To my lovely reviewers: Seeing these lovely reviews of you makes me proud. I actually made someone laugh. Oh goodie. I like that!

But I've got a question for you all: where are you from? Because I'm from Belgium and my mother tongue is Dutch. So if I make some grammar or spelling mistakes: please forgive me, I'll do my best. But I'd like to have some English corespondents, you know to improve my English, because that's what I'm going to study next year.

So for those who are interested: but before you do that: review:-D

Grtz Jade The Orkkiller

Fourth step: What to do when your wife has gone in labour?

The first thing I would say is: RUN AWAY! But that would mean: never return. Bad option. I mean as horrible as the whole pregnant thing was I still love Ginny. Yeah you can call me a hopeless lovesick man. But I mean what I say, Ginny is my world as often as we disagree, she means everything to me. But to answer the question, what do you do when your wife has gone in labour? First of all: DON'T PANIC! Your wife will get totally nervous and believe me you don't want to deal with a nervous, pregnant, labouring wife. Secondly: DON'T SMILE! Your wife will get angry if you do so. I believe me you don't want to deal with a angry, pregnant labouring wife.

One month later, Ginny and I were well sleeping when the fate decided to er ... well intervened.

"Harry, Harry! For heaven's sake HARRY WAKE UP YOU DAMN IDIOT!" I woke up with a start.

"Where's the fire?" I asked looking bewildered around. WACK!

"YOU STUPID ASSHOLE! THERE IS NO FIRE! My water just broke." It took several minutes for me to figure out what that meant.

"Omygod omygod! What should we do, what should I do?" I panicked.

"You git, I need a healer NOW! Omygod, I'm going to die!!! Harry what if something is wrong with the baby? I'm to young to die! Where is that stupid healer!"

"Oh right." I ran to the fireplace and firecalled St Mungo's.

"Please send a healer over, my wife has gone in labour!" he yelled.

A minute later a healer stepped out of the fireplace.

"Where is she?" he asked.

Harry led him to the bedroom.

"What took you do long!" Ginny said in tears and she started screaming again.

"Is she going to be alright? Omygod, is everything alright?!" I asked panicking.

"HARRY STOP PANICKING! YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS!" Ginny yelled. I tried to force a smile, hoping that it would comfort her.

"STOP SMILING LIKE A BLOODY IDIOT! THERE IS NOTHING TO SMILE ABOUT! I'M IN PAIN, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO LAUGH!" I quickly wiped the smile of my face.

"Everything is alright for now, we only have to wait a couple of hours before you're fully dilated."

"YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! YOU'RE SAYING THAT I'VE TO SUFFER FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS?"