Author's Note: After the harshness of the previous chapter, I decided I wanted to throw in some good-quality mush because from this point on, things go downhill. For those of you desiring fluff, this should prove fluffy enough.
x-o-o-x
Chapter 19
Memento Mori
x-o-o-x
"Only do what your heart tells you."
- Princess Diana
x-o-o-x
Harry sat on his sister's bed, his feet dangling off the end, wishing he had brought a watch with him. Buffy had told him she'd meet him after the Order meeting. They both knew they needed to talk, but she hadn't come back yet. That was more than an hour ago, he'd wager. He ran a hand down his face, attempting to wake up. Of course he'd gotten there and had fallen asleep. He hadn't been sleeping the best of late and knew that part of that was because he was worried. There was too much to worry about. How could he keep it all straight?
He was just drifting off into a light doze when he heard frantic pounding on the other side of the portrait hole. Harry groaned as he sat up, rubbing his eyes tiredly. It probably wasn't Buffy unless she had forgotten her password, which did happen on occasion. But likely it was someone else, one of her friends there to gossip or do whatever it was that Buffy's friends did with her.
He was forced not to snicker at his own mindset as he heavily moved to the door. If Buffy was there and had forgotten her password, he would at least be able to do that for her.
But the person on the other side of the portrait wasn't Buffy.
It was Faith.
But this wasn't Faith as he knew her. His image of Faith didn't shake and stare at him as though he was a ghost. She certainly didn't try and avoid eye contact while shaking her head and backing away. He had never seen her like this, even when her life was falling apart.
"Faith?" he asked gently.
"Is B here?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. Her hands were shaking and she had great difficulty even looking at him. This was leading him to believe that she had done something wrong.
"She hasn't come back yet," Harry murmured as Faith paced the hallway outside. The portrait was standing with her back to them, grumbling about the rudeness of those who had borrowed her to protect the Slayer's quarters. "What's wrong? What happened?"
"I screwed up," she said, her head tilting to the side as a look of anguish crossed her face. "I…"
"Come on," Harry said, taking her arm and pulling her into Buffy's room. The portrait swung shut behind them. He had a feeling that what Faith was about to say was not for the ears of the masses and likely there would be eavesdroppers. "Now, tell me what happened."
She kept her gaze at her feet, shaking her head. "I can't."
"Is it about Buffy?" he asked, unable to keep the anxiety out of his voice. He knew he shouldn't have to worry about his sister as she could take care of herself, but she was off her game lately. At Faith's reluctant nod, he felt a stab of anger. "What aren't you telling me?"
"You don't know?"
He stared at her blankly. "I don't know anything," he said softly. His hand reached out to touch her face, but her hand shot out and knocked his arm away. "Faith, please, tell me what's bothering you so much."
"I screwed up, okay?" she snapped angrily, running a hand through her hair. "It wasn't supposed to go down like that. It… she shouldn't have found out… not that way."
"You're not making any sense," Harry replied, watching as her nervous pacing continued.
"None of it makes any sense!" Faith cried out, rounding on him. "None of it does! When she came back, it was supposed to be better. I could do what I wanted. I didn't have to be here. I never wanted this life! I watched what they did to her and it made me sick! But what those sick freaks did to her…" Her voice became choked and she pressed a hand to her mouth, looking ashamed.
Harry moved over to her, reaching out to touch her. This time, she didn't push him away.
"I wanted her to know the truth about her perfect life here. They would destroy her to save you." Earnest eyes met his. "I didn't want that for her. Don't you see that she deserves better than that? She was a hero long before she knew you existed. They are slowly draining her of the life she thought she knew. I don't care what side wants her for whatever reason but I'll be damned if they get another chance."
In this moment, Harry saw how deeply the Slayers were connected. There were times when Buffy and Faith seemed sisters of the same core and there were times when they were as unique as the houses they lived in. "Faith…" he whispered, pulling her closer.
"You don't understand," she murmured, staring up at him. "All this time, I thought I could stay away to protect you because you are the most important person in the world. How could they make you suffer so much? How can they keep tearing your family away from you?"
"Tonight, Faith," he said, trying to keep things as simple as they could be. "What happened tonight?"
"I wanted Buffy to know the truth about her precious friends that betrayed her. They will do everything in their power to keep you safe, even if it means the life of your sister."
Harry shook his head to clear it. He should have seen it coming. The government had screwed him before and now it was after his sister. "Where is she?"
"She ran," Faith's voice broke. "I forced her to make a choice between us and them."
"What about me?"
Faith's heart shattered at the sound of the deep sadness in his voice. Her eyes met his and blurred as he took a step back. "Harry…"
"Don't I have a right to family?" he asked, his voice rising. "Don't I ever have a say? All of my life, people have been dictating a path for me that I wish I could just forget about! I keep losing the people I care about, the people I love! Do you think I enjoy watching them suffer?"
"Of course not—"
"Do you really think I am going to stand by and let them take and take and take when my life is on the line?"
Faith's head tipped down as she felt something wet streak down one of her pale cheeks. "I was stupid to think you would."
"This war has claimed my parents. I won't let it take anyone else I love. Not again."
Faith shook her head. "You shouldn't have to."
His fingers came forward and brushed her chin, nudging it upwards. Her eyes slowly lifted and locked onto his. "Not even you."
Faith felt her heart tense and hammer in her chest, the blood rushing into her ears. She blinked uncertainly at him. "Harry…"
"I don't give a damn what sense of foolish pride you think you have," he said, his voice gaining strength.
"How could I even want to be near you if I thought for one second I was capable of killing you?" she asked.
"Because, in case you haven't noticed, the end of the world is coming," Harry replied, drawing her closer. Her hands clenched into fists and rested against his chest, preparing for a battle to push herself away if necessary. "Are you going to hide forever?"
"I don't want to," she muttered. How could she ever think to stay away from him? The way her body was pressed to his was sending sparks to all of the dangerously wrong places. She felt the old longing shatter her perfect control as he pulled her even closer. His breath was warm on her face, his eyes shining behind his spectacles. He was so close now… so treacherously close…
"I am going to find you one day," he replied, his voice nothing more than a whisper as his forehead rested against hers. "Even if I have to drag you from the Hellmouths of this planet to do it, I am going to find you. When this war is over—"
"Who said the war had to be over?" She was being foolish, she knew. But she was hurting. And when she hurt, she tended to think with something other than her brain and her hormones weren't exactly cooperating either. Why did she keep pulling herself away? Harry was the most important person in this fight and he wanted her. "I was thinking more of tonight."
Before he could open his mouth to answer her, her hands unclenched and swept to his neck, drawing his face down to hers. Her lips met his hard. She used his shoulders as leverage to pull herself even closer as his hands wrapped around her back, arching her into him. Everything was so blissfully clear when she felt like this. It was far better than worrying about the consequences when she came to her senses. But if this could last forever, she wouldn't complain. But it was his hands on her arms that slowed it down until she drew back, gasping. His eyes glinted in the darkness as they stood there, staring at one another.
If we die tomorrow, Faith thought to herself, how would I want to spend my last night on this planet?
His reasoning sounded a whole lot like hers, even as he reached to push her hair back from her face, those eyes never leaving hers. That was all she needed to convince herself that this was what she wanted.
His hands glided over her arms and around her neck to her face to hold her there. His tongue swept the seal of her lips and she allowed him entrance. But the craving kicked in and she wanted more, adding fire as she nipped his lower lip and tugged, her fingers skillfully prying the robes from his body. Her own robes pooled at her feet and she felt the scorch of his hands on her back as her hands pushed the material from his shoulders as his robes joined hers. Before he could take on her jumper, she pulled back long enough to push him backwards. He stumbled and caught his heel on the edge, sending him spilling onto the bed. She was on him in a fraction of a second, her dark hair cascading over her face and into his as her hand wandered down his abdomen and below. A moment later, he flinched and his eyes opened, staring brightly at her. With a wicked smile, she drew her tongue along his lips as his trembling hand touched hers.
It had never really occurred to her that this saintly young man beneath her had never experienced what she as a Slayer had come to see as something she could take for granted. There was another moment of silence before his hand moved hers. Her eyes widened and his head came up, his lips taking hers. She moaned into his mouth as the hindering fabric fell away.
x-o-x
Ice lashed out at the windows, the fading sound of thunder a distant music to her ears. Buffy lay on her side, her fingers idly twirling her hair as she stared at the window, the streaks of pink and white. Despite the warmth of her body with the fire at her back and a fading fire within, she felt cold and numb.
A hand touched her back. She flinched at the contact before she sat up, holding the covers to her body as she began searching for her clothes scattered among the garments on the floor.
"What is it?" a sleepy voice asked as the hand fell away. "Aren't you going to sleep?"
"No."
His blue eyes narrowed and he sighed, pressing the palms of his hands to his forehead. He had been having a quiet evening when she had pounded on the door to the room he had taken at the Hogs Head Inn. She was standing on the other side, drenched, trembling and sobbing as though her heart had fallen and was bleeding at her feet. Of course Oliver had taken her in. After a few moments of just holding her, it had come to something that was considered a bit more intimate. But as he had drifted off afterwards, he felt that she was pulling away.
"What's wrong?" he finally queried, propping himself on his elbows as she hopped across the darkened room in front of him, struggling to get back into her damp pants.
"Nothing."
"This isn't nothing," he said, gesturing to her as she yanked on her sweater, offering him a striking view of her backside. "Buffy, please, come back. You can head back to the school in the morning."
"I'm not going back," she mumbled.
He sighed again and pushed the blankets aside, searching for his robe amongst his things.
"What are you doing?" she asked, yanking on one of her boots.
"I'm getting up with you."
"No, you're not."
This should have been something that she cherished as much as he did. After all, they had been separated for months. Her Watcher had pretty much limited their intimacy in Germany. And now she seemed to be pulling herself away. After what they had gone through the year before, he felt that they had earned tonight. Instead, he was watching her rush it along.
"Would you stop for just a moment?" he asked, grabbing her by the shoulders. As he did, he gave her a quite striking view of what she had just seen. Her eyebrow lifted as she gazed at him. "Buffy, you're acting insane."
Her eyes had softened at his touch but had hardened at his words. "You sure know how to talk a girl to your bed, don't you?" she snapped, bending down to grab her other boot.
His eyes rolled as he pulled a robe on. "I'm just trying to understand where all of this anger is coming from."
"Sorry if I wasn't all gentle Gerry on you," she replied, her voice sounding dead as she pulled on her other boot and bent down to tie it.
"Buffy…"
"WHAT?" she yelled, her dark gaze snapping back at him. "What do you want to tell me? What do you want from me?"
Oliver was taken aback by her outrage as she stormed at him, her index finger poking painfully into his chest.
"What do you know?" she challenged, those hazel eyes burning into his.
"Buffy, this isn't you," Oliver said, watching as his girlfriend stalked his inn room in agitation. "You are not one to be playing games with me."
Her body tensed and she slowly turned to him. "Playing games… is that what you think this is?"
"Is that all I am to you?" he asked in a hurt voice. "Just someone to play around with?"
"How can you ask me that?" she snarled, charging him again, her hands glancing off his chest, sending him stumbling backwards into the wall. "First Faith and Percy and the Order and now you?"
"Buffy…"
"No!" she shrieked, turning away as her hands went to her hair. A moment later, her arms fell aside. "I am not going to let anyone plays these games with me. They want me to pick a side, fine. I am not going to hurt my friends or my family because they can't function together anymore!"
Oliver gaped at her. He didn't have a clue what was going on, but was afraid to ask as they would likely get into another petty argument and that was the last thing he wanted.
"In case you haven't noticed, everything is falling apart," she ranted, jerking her coat over her shoulders. "The Ministry did this, the Slayers did that, the Death Eaters are doing God knows what. And for some reason, why am I always the one they have to blame?"
"I don't—"
"Because big, mean, nasty Buffy is a threat? I'll show them what a real threat is. When those Death Eaters are marching through, killing off everyone I care about—" Her voice became choked as she started to cry, her hands gesturing wildly as she struggled to get her thoughts out. "Oh, what do you know? It's not like you're even going to be there!"
"What do you mean?" he asked angrily. "I'm standing right here."
"You know what I mean," she snapped. "When the nasties start a'comin', where are you going to be? You'll be in the safety of your home! You don't know anything about war. I bet you don't even know what's at stake, what we're risking our lives for! You don't have to be a part of it!"
"Neither do you," he said calmly, folding his arms against his chest.
Buffy's gaze darkened further as she jerked her bag from underneath a chair. "You know that I am not going to stand by and watch my brother die. Heaven can't stop me. Hell won't stop me. The only thing that will stop me is death and if I die, I die. We all do… it's the gift of mortality. Some just see it faster than others."
"And if you think I'm going to stand by and watch you die, you don't know me as well as you think you do."
Her gaze leveled on his as she walked slowly towards him, the look on her face taunting. He knew he was baiting her and that was treading dangerous waters as it were. "Are you going to take up arms?" she asked him quietly. "Are you going to kill a man before he kills you?" She let out a breath in a scoff. "I don't think you have what it takes to kill. You are not meant to kill. Your hands are meant for greater things than death."
He let out a slow breath at her praise but knew it came with cost. "You are one of the most important things to me. If that means that I defend what I'm supposed to defend with my life, so be it."
"I will not ask you to die for me," she whispered. "Stay out of this fight. You don't want to get caught up in this."
"But what about you?" he demanded. "Whatever they've done, whatever they said – the pressure is killing you!"
"Maybe it's a sign," Buffy said, giving him a sad half-smile. "Maybe—"
"Don't say that," he said, reaching for her arms, his hands sliding to hers. "This is our future you're playing with here."
"Our future," she breathed. A moment later, she shook her head and closed her eyes painfully before pulling her hands from his. "I'm going to war and you're talking like I'm taking a trip to London! This is much, much bigger than the two of us, Oliver. This isn't just our future. This is the future of our entire world!"
His eyes closed in frustration. "I know, but—"
"A Slayer means death, Oliver. I am meant to kill. Maybe you've forgotten after a kiss here and a kiss there, but it all comes down to one thing. I'm a killer."
"I don't accept that."
"You don't have to," she said with a helpless shrug. "I do. And since you're not the voice of me now, I guess mine is the only one that matters."
"But I love you. Does that mean nothing?"
"No, it means something," she said, glancing at him with eyes that were too bright. "I guess a part of me will always know that, but I am not going to risk my life for you to act stupid and heroic. Love doesn't end wars. The only thing that solves war is death." She turned and continued searching for anything she might have missed.
"Where are you going at this hour?" he asked, his eyes flicking to the miserable weather outdoors.
"I have to get out of here," she mumbled, buttoning her coat. "I…"
Oliver watched her movements become more frantic. "Nothing is worth this," he said, gesturing to the ice outside.
She paused, a harsh laugh bubbling from her lips. "Maybe you don't think anything is worth this, but I almost lost a friend tonight. I may lose more if my friends don't get their heads screwed on straight. Percy—" Her voice caught up, because she didn't really want to talk about him, despite the fact that he was her friend. The sight of him lying there, weakened, bloodied and mocked by Faith… her eyes closed and another shadow passed over her face. "I have to go."
"What about Percy?" he asked calmly as he sat on the edge of his bed, watching as she jerked her pant legs over the tops of her boots. "Are you telling me that you're going out there because of him?"
"You don't—"
Oliver felt something settle inside of him. There was such passion in her face, such indecision… if only he could get inside her mind to see what she was thinking! "So you have to go running back to him, is that it?"
"Don't be stupid!" she shouted back. "I chose you, didn't I?"
"And look at where it's gotten us!" he yelled back.
"Don't play me, Oliver," she said, rising to her full height and squaring her shoulders. "I've been played enough." There was pain in her words. "I'm done being played with."
"Then maybe you should just go," he said in a hollowed tone. "You should see to your friends. Lord knows you haven't pissed everyone off."
Her eyes flared for a moment before she turned on her heel and pulled the door open, yanking it shut behind her. Her footfalls faded as she moved away, leaving Oliver in his room alone with his confused thoughts.
x-o-x
Though the others had left, he was most acutely aware that she was still sitting on his bed and she was still gazing at him. He ignored her, even as she tried to get his attention by stretching or clearing her throat or using an annoying little cough that had him sending reproachful glares at his feet. He wished he could ask her to leave, but he didn't have the heart.
Not when he was wondering why she had even bothered to come. Obviously he wouldn't forgive the intrusion. Even if he was British to the core, that spoke nothing of his duties as Watcher. He had failed the first time around and had royally screwed up the second time. This third time was his final chance to get things right. He had finally had some progress with Faith, watching as the young woman had matured these past few months. Being thrust into the light as the one Slayer had done wonders for her, changing and shaping the sharper corners of her aggressive personality. He hadn't had much pride in his work before, but the past few months had changed him, too.
But after another few moments, he couldn't hold his silence. "Why are you still here?"
"Because I don't want to leave."
"You really should before one of the Slayers returns," Wesley said in a tired voice as he looked at her. Her eyes rested on his face and he quickly looked away. "Family or not, Faith won't hold anything back."
"I take it you're proud of the fact that your Slayer has these violent tendencies?"
"Your entire family seems bred for violence," Wesley countered.
"Not mine," Tonks snapped. "My father was a Muggle."
"And that means so much to me," Wesley said sarcastically. Tonks rolled her eyes and pressed her hands to her face. "What I can't believe is that you knew something about the Slayer and you said nothing."
"It wasn't my confession to tell," Tonks said quietly.
"You could have saved us a lot of grief," Wesley persisted. "In case you haven't noticed, we don't like being pulled around like that."
"Our intentions were not that—"
"You could have fooled me," Wesley muttered under his breath.
Tonks shot him a quick glare. "Must I tell you what those Slayers did? Or what Buffy did? Harry's sister or not, she used the darkest magic last year."
"Does it really matter what she did? She doesn't go around killing people with curses. Nymphadora, do use your head! For God's sake, how many times does she have to lay her life on the line just to prove to your worthless government that the Slayers are actually not to be messed with? They are forces of nature… they need to be unleashed, not withdrawn. If anyone is to blame for Faith's or Buffy's anger…"
"If we had the choice to do it again, we would," Tonks said simply. "One Slayer was bad enough. We had no idea when they were brought here that they would carry that much darkness."
"You would say that of your own family?" Wesley asked her coldly. "Buffy is one matter. Faith is different. You may think Buffy more dangerous than Faith, but they are Slayers to the core and nothing, not even death, could tell them different save experience."
"Wesley…"
"No, you listen to me," he said, getting up from his seat. "How can you be so biased against Buffy unless it is because she's Harry's sister. After everything the Ministry put on him, after all the wrongs they did to him—"
"We have been paying for those mistakes," Tonks said earnestly, watching Wesley pace.
"But why, why would you take his family away? Why?" Wesley asked. "You and I both know something about the bitterness of family. You don't want to own up to the darker Blacks, like your mother's sisters, but you can't deny that they're your blood!"
"Because we needed to protect him!" Tonks cried out. "The Slayers are nothing but harbingers of death, misery and demons! Harry Potter does not deserve a life like that. He deserves more than anything that sister of his can give him. He is bound for a life better than this darkness, Wes. You know this."
"So what you're saying is that being a Slayer's brother is not good enough for him," Wesley said, his eyes narrowing. "After how many times my Slayers have saved the world…"
"It speaks nothing of their skill, but what they've done so far since they've come to England."
"You could have told me," he said, his voice a heated whisper as he pinned her with a sharp blue gaze. "You could have done something different. I don't give a damn about who you betray on your end, but by holding the truth, you betrayed my family and I won't have that."
"Wes—"
"Am I your enemy?"
Tonks stared at Wesley for a moment, her eyes widening. "What?"
"Am I your enemy?"
The thoughts that had been welling in her mind for some time now seemed quashed by the pain in those words. "How can you say that?"
"Because I did." His voice was firm and his eyes never left her face. "Am I?"
"You know that you're not my enemy," she said in a quivering voice.
"But my Slayers are."
Tonks remained silent. She didn't know what to say.
He sighed as he got to his feet, gesturing to his portrait hole. "Go."
"Wesley, please…"
"I have nothing to give you. If you feel that my Slayers are a threat after what they've proven themselves to be, then you are no longer welcome here. Go." He nodded at the door. Tonks got to her feet and stared at the Watcher, trying to read his expression. But his eyes were stony and cold and his posture erect and solid. It seemed as though he were determined to make a stand for the Slayers who couldn't seem to do so for themselves.
"I am not your enemy," she said earnestly, wanting to let her voice be heard before she walked out of his room and quite possibly his life. The friendship they'd developed over the past few months was crumbling beneath her feet. "I came to you tonight, didn't I?"
"I know you weren't responsible for Buffy, but Faith's incarceration last year…"
Tonks swallowed hard and shrugged helplessly. She had been partially responsible for apprehending Faith, but she wasn't about to admit that to Wesley. A cold feeling coiled in her abdomen, tears springing to her eyes. Why was it so important for her to defend her actions to this man? She didn't owe him anything!
And yet… as she stared at the coldness of his eyes, the chill deepened. There was more there than just friendship, she decided. And this confrontation was more than just crumbling their friendship. It was breaking her heart, which had already endured so much from Remus.
"You should leave before I do something I'll regret."
A single tear dropped from her eyelash, decorating her cheek with a frosty glow. "Please believe me," she whispered. "I didn't mean anything against you."
His sharp eyes held hers for a moment before he turned away. "I won't ask you again," he said coldly. Tonks turned and walked out through the portrait hole, drawing a deep, calming breath to soothe her nerves. But inside, she felt as though she were breaking. Pressing a hand to her eyes, she sank against the wall near the portrait hole in an attempt to pull herself together.
Inside his room, Wesley felt oddly comforted when his portrait closed. But inside, he felt conflicted. Part of him longed to wrap his arms around her and forget their mutual alliances. She was with the government. His loyalty belonged to the Slayers. The other part felt satisfied at the broken look on her face. He knew what he felt, but he knew she was too young to fully grasp those emotions. Watching Buffy muddle through hers was bad enough and she was just a few years Tonks' junior.
It was a small comfort to him that he managed to convince himself that Tonks and the werewolf deserved each other. No matter how his jealousy took that.
x-o-x
Faith drew in a deep breath as she settled herself under Harry's arm, her dark hair spilling across the bed. "Mm," she sighed, nuzzling his shoulder with her cheek.
"Now that," Harry chuckled next to her, "was good." His hand idly moved down from her hips below. Her eyes closed at the touch as she nipped at his shoulder before resting her head against the bone.
"You should stop before I get all worked up again."
"Do you really have that much to give?" he asked, those green eyes that much brighter as he observed a glow that seemed to set her pale skin on fire. It didn't help that he was afforded such a beautiful image. Her hand cupped his cheek as her lips teased his, her hands wandering across his chest.
"I'm spent," she moaned as she curled into his side. "At least for now, anyway."
"That's a relief."
Her hand vibrated as it smacked his chest. He blinked at the sharp stab of pain and the numbness that followed. His fingers from the arm wrapped around her lifted from her hips and began to idly stroke her dark hair. "I could have done with more of that," she said playfully as she walked her fingers across his chest.
"With whom?" he asked, covering her hand with his. She recognized the scars on the back of it as from when Umbridge forced him to cut into his own hand and write lines with his own blood. Her own body tensed at that and she bent over, pressing her lips to his scar.
"I do have a good history with B's men," she taunted, pulling back and shaking her head, her dark hair cascading down her back.
Harry made a sound between a hiss and a roar as he pulled her closer. She smirked widely at him as her thigh brushed against his hip, sliding farther up. She loved the way his eyes widened as she did something he wasn't expecting. It was something new with him, she decided. And then she decided she liked it. A lot.
"Are you saying you want me?" she asked lightly.
"I have you," he growled as she chuckled throatily, dropping her head onto his chest. He felt her cool fingers on his skin below the belt gently moving across his startled flesh. "I just wasn't sure if you wanted me."
"It wasn't the issue," Faith yawned as her lack of sleep began catching up with her. If there was one thing all of this foreplay was good for – aside from the mess they made of the room – it was a great stress reliever. Even Harry looked more relaxed as his eyes closed. She allowed herself to snuggle into his side and pull her arms up against her body as he settled a comforter over them. "Can I rest now?"
He dropped a kiss on top of her head as he resumed stroking her hair. "I think we could both do with a good bit of that."
"I like sleeping," she murmured, a slight smile on her face. "But I like this more."
"You like what?" he asked drowsily, glancing down at the obsidian mass spread across his chest.
"Pillow talk," Faith snickered as she wound her arm across his chest. "You know, the kind that doesn't involve some lord of the bed claiming his prickle made my itch any less than seventh heaven."
There was a beat before Harry added, "Did you want to talk about—"
"No, no," Faith whispered, blushing against his pale skin. "I meant non-dirty."
"So, non-dirty," Harry said, though his mind had already escaped to all of those dirty places. "You and my sister—"
"Harry!" Faith gasped, lifting her head to look at him, her dark eyes shining in the dim light. "You know a girl never kisses and tells!"
"Noted," he coughed as she settled back into his chest. "Non-dirty."
Her grin against his skin was bright. "You're going to get me all worked up again."
"And we wouldn't want that," Harry teased.
"Mm… not now. But I'm thinking that once this whole thing with Voldemort is over… maybe we could, you know, take off for a few days and see where it takes us?" She asked this question lightly, but she had been thinking about this for a long time. Once the war was over and Voldemort was dead, she would be free of this godforsaken curse. She could finally shove aside whatever fears were holding her back and do what she wanted for herself, for once. This wasn't a matter of wanting, taking and having. This was a matter of her soul. Part of this bright young man just happened to complete it. That was all.
"I think I'd like that, but…" His voice grew distant. "What makes you so sure that I'll win?"
"Because if you don't, we all lose," she said in a low voice. She didn't mean to turn this post-bliss into an angst-ridden talk about a post-war future, but she had to admit that his question did have some merit. "I'm not willing to lose anymore."
"And I'm not willing to lose you," he said fiercely, holding her even tighter to his chest.
"You're not going to because I'm someone who's very stubborn about getting her way," Faith said, one eyebrow arching as she lightly traced the spot where his ribs stuck from his skin. "And I'm thinking that you're my way."
"Perhaps in your way."
"Never happen," she yawned, slipping her opposite arm underneath his neck and drawing herself closer.
"What about Buffy?"
Faith felt a pang and a sense of sadness as she remembered what had brought her to this room in the first place. "If she ever forgives me, I guess we'll know." He didn't say anything. He didn't want to say anything that could spoil this for them.
She smothered a yawn as she flattened her hand on his stomach and closed her eyes, drawing in his scent. It wasn't anything she could ever forget. How could she forget this night? For once, she was able to throw her fear aside and be something rebellious. Wesley would probably curse her for it tomorrow, but tonight… she didn't care. As she drifted off to sleep with the thought of finally getting something right in her head, Harry stroked her hair, a comforting gesture she would never thank him enough for.
Harry just gazed down at her as her breathing slowly calmed until he was sure she was asleep. His mind was, for once, blissfully clear. Only one thing made sense and that was the dark-haired Slytherin in his arms. After recalling what Hermione said about breaking down the hostilities between the Houses, he thought that tonight he had done a rather good job of that tonight.
But there was one thing still left unsaid. There was still one thing he had to do. Lifting his hand to press a kiss to the crown of her head, he whispered, "I love you."
But Faith, not being as quite asleep as he had thought, smiled into his side as she let the words sink in.
x-o-x
Percy slowly opened his eyes as the feeling returned to his right cheek. He groaned and moved his head to the left and then to the right. His first surprise came when he saw his parents standing on one side of his hospital bed. His next surprise was the Emma hadn't left the other. She sat on the edge of the bed and the pressure he felt on his hand was actually her hand woven through his. He was surprised to see that there were steaks from dried tears that decorated her normally pale face, which was slightly flushed as her gaze dropped down to their hands. His fingers must have slipped between hers in his own oblivion. He felt slightly foolish, but the smile they shared was anything but.
"How are you feeling, son?" Arthur Weasley asked in a bright voice. After being summoned after the latest meeting of the Order, the last thing he imagined was to find his third-eldest son in the infirmary.
"Like I had one of those cartoon mallets you like so much fall on my head," Percy moaned, bringing his free hand up to cradle his head.
"My poor boy," Molly sniffled as she flung her arms around her son, her lips smacking his cheek loudly. "My poor baby boy."
Obviously his mother had gone around the bend since Bill had died. She had never cared to make such a fuss over him, even when he had almost died the previous Christmas.
"Mum, mum, I'm fine," he said, untangling his fingers from Emma's to push his mother hastily away. "It was just a little misunderstanding."
"I believe we should have a word about the likes of her being allowed to return to this school after this stunt she pulled," Molly said, dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief.
"Mum?" a feminine voice piped in as Ginny appeared in the doorway, followed by a sleepy Ron. "Mum, what's wrong? Professor McGonagall said something about Percy…"
Ron's eyes widened when he saw his elder brother laying pathetically on his cot, covered by cuts, bruises and swellings the size of a grapefruit. "What the bloody hell happened to you?"
"Ron!" Molly hissed, her penchant for foul language far defeating her youngest son's concern for his brother.
"Mum, he has a valid point," Ginny protested, pushing past Emma and sitting at the edge of his bed. "Who would do such a thing?"
"Faith," Percy and Emma replied in unison.
Ron's eyebrows lifted so high they almost disappeared under his hairline. "But why would she…? How…" his voice faltered as he realized something. "You didn't attack her, did you?"
"He took responsibility for the Ministry's actions in Buffy's relocation to Bulgaria," Emma explained to the Weasleys. "It wasn't his call, but he did it anyway. He knew that there would be consequences, but to face the ire of a Slayer…"
"Her bite is definitely worse than her bark," Percy winced, reaching for his glasses. Ginny caught her brother's pathetic attempt, rolled her eyes and retrieved them for him.
"You should know better than to get on her bad side," Ron said matter-of-factly, as though he had written the encyclopedia on Faith. "She's definitely got a temper."
"Nevertheless, she shouldn't be going around slugging our brother," Ginny said with a sniff, drawing up Percy's blankets in a way that his mother would have done. "I hope Dumbledore expels her for that."
Percy fought not to wince as he scoffed. "He won't."
"What makes you so sure?" Ron asked. "He told her she would only get one chance."
"How do you know so much about this?" Ginny asked, looking around at him. "You spent maybe three minutes talking and the rest snogging."
"Yes, well, but—"
Percy lifted his hand quietly. "I really don't care how my brother knows the Slayer, but the truth is… Buffy knows."
"It's better that she does," Ginny said quietly.
"She's also a bit brassed," Emma concluded sullenly. "She just ran away when Faith told her… like she couldn't take it anymore."
"Could you really blame her?" Ginny asked sharply. "After everything she's been through the past year and a half, I don't suppose a little support never occurred to any of you."
"That's why I wanted to be the one to own up to the sins of the Ministry," Percy murmured as he rested his head into a small mountain of pillows.
"Because you knew she'd forgive you," Ron realized.
Molly and Arthur watched as their children and Emma stood around, piecing together things that had happened. After a moment, he cocked his head to his wife and drew her from the infirmary. They were met outside by both Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall.
"I think it'd be best under the circumstances that Faith remains at Hogwarts," Dumbledore said in a low voice even as Professor McGonagall opened her mouth to protest.
"Perhaps it would be best," Arthur conceded.
"Arthur!" Molly gasped, spinning around to him, shock written on her face.
"She has as much right to be here as they do," Arthur defended, gesturing inside to where Ron and Ginny were now arguing with Percy over which of his eyes was blacker. "And if her being here gives Harry a fighting chance, who are we to tell her otherwise?"
Professor Dumbledore gave Arthur a bright smile. "Well said, Arthur, well said. Now, if you please, I do have a matter of the Order I wish to discuss with you. After a most enlightening conversation with Miss Black, I do believe the time has now come for it."
"Lead the way," Molly said, her curiosity piqued. She took her husband's arm, casting a last look inside the infirmary before they were ushered away.
Inside, Ron and Ginny were babbling about nothing in particular. Percy didn't notice because he was staring at Emma. Even when his family was driving him insane, as they were now, she was far more pleasant to look at. She was smirking at Ron before her gaze shifted to his. It became almost shy as she came forward, her hand reaching automatically for his. He felt a spark as her fingers wrapped around his, providing silent support for the sound his siblings were making. For a moment, all the world belonged to them…
And she wasn't all that bad to look at, either.
Madame Pomfrey swept into the infirmary, took in Ron and Ginny babbling and set her foot down. "No more guests," she said calmly, looking pointedly at the door. "The patient needs to rest. You can see him tomorrow."
As Ginny and Ron said their good nights and swept out, Emma chose to remain at his side, even at Madame Pomfrey's glare.
"It's all right," Percy said, offering the healer a bright smile. "She's not the one bothering me."
Madame Pomfrey took in their locked hands. "Hmph," she mustered as she shuffled away.
"Thanks for that," Emma whispered.
Percy grinned up at her as she settled next to him. "It was nothing." As her hip bumped into his, he became acutely aware of how cute she was when she acted all awkwardly. "Really… nothing…"
x-o-x
Both Weasley siblings were quiet until they reached their Common Room.
"Have you seen Harry tonight?" Ginny asked him as they turned the last corner.
"He wasn't in bed when I left," Ron said, his voice rising in concern. "Do you suppose we should have raised some alarm?"
"I know he was waiting for Buffy, so I suppose he's in her room. It's not like they'd let him out of the school. Not now, anyway."
Ron gave her a comforting smile, gave the password to the Fat Lady and swept into the hole, his sister following behind him.
"How do you know so much about Faith, anyway?" Ginny asked curiously as they walked into the warm and comforting surroundings. "You two never talked when you were together."
"No, we didn't," Ron said vaguely. "And it doesn't matter how I know. All I know is that she's not nearly as thick as you all put her for."
"Obviously not," Ginny replied as she followed her brother to the stairs. "She wouldn't be in Harry's army otherwise." She paused before she walked up the steps to the boy's dorms. "'Night, Ron."
"Good night, Gin," he said, watching as his sister bounced off. He had the feeling that he was not the only one hiding something.
x-o-x
Two candles were the only light in the dining room at Grimmauld Place as Sirius bent over the dining table, pushing a mug of hot chocolate across the table. "There you go."
"Thank you."
He sat in his seat, waiting for her to say something. There had to be a reason why she would come to his family's house in the dead of night. Her excuse of having nowhere else to go just didn't sit well with him. "Buffy…" he began.
She set down the spoon she'd been stirring her cocoa with, blinking up at him with bright eyes. "Oh, I'm okay. I just needed someplace to go." At the sudden look in his eyes, she added hastily, "Someplace that isn't Hogwarts."
"Did something happen?" he asked quietly.
"You could say that," she whispered, her face falling. "I…"
"Hey," Sirius said, recognizing the blank look on her face followed by a hard sadness in her eyes. He hated seeing her like this. James certainly wouldn't stand for it. "Don't beat yourself up. Whatever this is, is it really worth these tears?"
"Everything is worth tears," she murmured.
"Why don't you start at the beginning?"
And so she did. She told him that she had suspected the Ministry being involved in her coma for some time. She told him that Percy had confessed that the Ministry had been involved, confirming her thoughts. And then she told him that Faith had laid the smack down on Percy just because the Ministry was involved. When she told him about Faith forcing her to choose between her friends and her, Sirius suddenly sat back, a drawn look coming to his face. "I had a feeling she was going to do that."
"You did?" she asked, not surprised. Sirius was Faith's brother after all.
He forced himself to nod. "A few days ago, she came just to tell me that she was going to make you choose between England and her."
"I really wish she didn't do that."
"She's an idiot."
Buffy felt a small curve of her lips at Sirius's sarcasm. "You'll get no argument from me."
"But she is also right. The Ministry has done quite a few questionable things and perhaps they can't be trusted. Your parents never truly trusted the Ministry, especially when their lives were endangered."
"They went to Dumbledore," Buffy said, realizing this. "Oh."
"They trusted him," Sirius said, with only a little bitterness in his voice. "They felt that he would do the right thing. And he did. If Peter hadn't betrayed them, everything would have worked out."
"And maybe then my family wouldn't be so broken," Buffy said sadly.
"You speak of family like it's a curse," Sirius observed, reaching for his own mug. "Have you even talked things out with Harry yet?" At Buffy's shifting eyes, he sighed. "You need to speak with him, Buffy. He might surprise you with his loyalty. He has always been Dumbledore's greatest hope and now all of our futures rest in him."
She was quiet for a moment, her thumb moving around the rim of her cup. At last, she met his gaze. "What if I told you that while I was in a coma, I was transported to a different world, almost like a dream? Would you think me crazy?"
"I guess that depends," Sirius replied with a frown.
"Mom and dad were still alive," Buffy said, her voice growing in intensity. "Harry, I and we had a sister, Dawn. We were all this happy family. Mom, dad and I worked on this police force together. And the reason I couldn't remember my life was because I had gotten shot saving your life."
Sirius made a sound as though to speak, but fell silent. The look on her face spoke volumes enough.
"I was engaged to a beautiful man who treated me like royalty and I had friends that were doing everything they could to help me remember. But I didn't want to remember. I wanted that life, to be the perfect wife and maybe a mommy someday. I loved my parents. I loved my job. And then they sent me back into the lion's den and the bad guys were all the Death Eaters." Again Sirius made to speak, but fell silent. "The tortured me. They… I can't even begin to describe the things they tried to get me to do, the things they tried to get me to admit?" There were tears in her eyes now. It was getting harder to speak as her voice was just starting to break. "I was shot because I refused to submit to them. And my mother…" Her voice broke now, the tears flowing freely. "They did everything in their power to save me and it wasn't enough. It just wasn't enough. And you… you never stopped watching out for me…"
Sirius felt the prickle of tears behind his eyelids, but refused to let these emotions show.
"And suddenly on my deathbed, they were there, telling me that there was still a chance because they had finally broken through to talk to me."
"It sounds like quite the dream," Sirius said gently, brushing his fingers across his eyes.
"That wasn't part of the dream," Buffy whispered. "They were real." Sirius's eyes widened as she took a second to collect herself. "They told me that there were more important things in my life than just my life. They reminded me of who I was and what I am – a Slayer. I was a Slayer before I came to England and I think, somewhere along the way, I had forgotten about what that means. But the most important thing they said was that Harry was the one they died for and they didn't have any regrets about it."
"No," Sirius murmured, "I don't suppose they would."
"They went through hell trying to find me locked in my own mind," Buffy said softly. "They convinced me that there are more important things worth living for. And I believe that, I really do. But part of me wants to believe in the dream that my friends are there to support me. They aren't fighting each other trying to win me over because in the real world, that doesn't happen. How in the hell do we have a chance if all we do is fight?"
"I've been wondering that very thing myself," Sirius replied.
"It doesn't matter what they are to me. What matters is what they bring to the table. The end is coming, Sirius, and it's going to be bad. People are going to die and nothing I do will change that. I might die, I might live."
Sirius let out a deep breath. "I quite imagine you'll get sick of hearing people say this, but things have changed since you left. Most of it has been for the worse, but some has been for the better. In case you haven't noticed, Faith is protected at Hogwarts. Not only does she have Dumbledore's protection, but the protection of the school itself. And I believe that it was fate that decided she should live with the Slytherins because not one of them has given the school or the Ministry any problems since she's lived there." He paused for a moment. "And I will not deny that things are not going to be bad, because we are both smart enough to admit that war has cost. We've both paid for it dearly."
"Yes, we have," she agreed. Part of her was glad that Sirius was squaring off with her. It was a relief that someone could spell it out for her because the vagueness was beginning to irk her.
"But we have been making preparations for the end. Dumbledore has a slight idea of Voldemort's final plans. They do include you and Faith, I don't deny that. But they also include Harry. Together, you are a triumvirate of good. But if he is able to activate you, Harry stands a real chance at losing."
"That's why we can't fail," Buffy agreed.
"Dumbledore believes that you three can handle yourself. But he knows the fight may come to Hogwarts. Voldemort has never been afraid of a challenge and the thought of casting down the school and the only person he has ever been afraid of in one fell swoop may prove too great to resist. He has always wanted Hogwarts for himself, knowing what enchantments the school has. There is one thing that can be done to protect the school, but I'm afraid the students will have to fend for themselves."
"They've proven before that they can handle that," she reminded him. "Harry's got Dumbledore's Army and we know that those kids are ready. They've been getting ready for—"
"I'm not quite sure Dumbledore is willing to let his students fight and perhaps die for the cause."
"I'm not sure he really has a choice," Buffy said quietly. "I mean, the government has proven it can be only partially trustworthy. They just got their asses kicked. What makes you think they're in any shape to help Harry out in this fight? He needs the students." She remembered how it felt when her fellow graduates took up arms against the Mayor-ascended-to-demon. The thought of being a general in another battle was motivating her.
"But there are worse things than just Death Eaters," Sirius reminded her. "There are Inferi, Dementors, Giants, likely other dark creatures like goblins, vampires, dragons—"
"We'll cross that bridge when we get there," Buffy said, leaning forward. "Just let me know what I can do, okay? I want to help."
Sirius felt his eyes mist over as he gazed at the young woman sitting in front of him. "You truly are your father's daughter."
"That I will never get tired of hearing about," she said with a sad smile.
"The thought of losing you or Faith terrifies me," he admitted.
"The thought scares me too," she replied. "But I'm not afraid of dying. Not if it's for something I believe in. And I believe in Harry."
Sirius leaned across the table, resting his hand on hers. "As do I, my dear. As do I."
x-o-x
The bell tolled, signaling the end of the first class. Faith ran a tired hand through her hair as she collected her books, flashing a bright smile at Professor Snape before flouncing out of Potions on her way to Charms. Juliet was surprisingly silent next to her with the others, including Pansy and Millicent, talking quietly behind them.
Faith and Juliet led the way down the hallway, ignoring the group of Gryffindors walking in front of them. Well, she was trying to ignore them. She couldn't stop the flutter in her stomach as she recognized one Adonis moving easily at the head of the group, talking proudly about the army he had put together and what he would do to protect them. She couldn't help but sigh.
An elbow found her ribs and Faith found her attention snapping back to a curiously smirking Juliet. "Are you okay?" she asked in a teasing voice. "You've got that goofy look on your face and you haven't stopped grinning all morning."
So she had, but it wasn't like she was in a sharing mood. She just shrugged and continued on towards Charms when her attention was suddenly drawn to the courtyard. A single figure wrapped in a jacket was leaning against one of the arches, staring at the dim sunlight shining through the mist.
"Tell Flitwick I'll catch up," Faith said suddenly, stepping behind Juliet and heading outside despite her friend's protests. But her attention was focused on one person. "Hey, Buffy."
The figure leaning against the column tensed and slowly relaxed. "Hello, Faith."
"You know," Faith began without waiting for Buffy to tell her off, "it occurred to me that I never asked what you want."
"What I want?" came the dull reply.
"Yeah," Faith replied. "You know, we both get thrown here, we both suffer, blah, blah, blah. But that's just life. We take it and we deal. But it doesn't matter what we want because we only get what we have."
Buffy attempted to let the words sink into her sleep-deprived brain, but failed miserable. With a scoff, she flicked her gaze to her sister Slayer. "That didn't make any sense."
"And neither did I last night," Faith said quietly. "That choice… it was stupid. How could I ask you to choose between me and your friends?"
"It wasn't an easy choice to make," Buffy admitted.
"And when you disappeared last night, I got to thinking that maybe, just maybe, you didn't have to choose at all. I mean, why should you have to make the choice when the rest of us have already chosen? You made the choice when you came here."
"I chose Harry," she realized.
"We both did."
Buffy slowly wound her arm around the column and used momentum to swing around to face Faith. "You and I both know how important he is to the end here."
"He's more important than you and I even know," Faith agreed. "But I've made my choice. And maybe in the beginning I should have respected yours and I didn't. I'm sorry."
Buffy looked astonished that Faith had apologized to her. Since when did the dark Slayer know how to apologize? "I'm sorry, too," she said in a hushed voice. "For not trusting you, I mean."
"I didn't mean to hurt him like I said," she said, referring to Percy. "It's just… he made me so mad! The whole thing just got blown away and I—"
"Faith, its okay," Buffy said, reaching over and placing a hand on her arm. "I get it. I understand, I really do."
"A lot happened to me since you left," she said, biting her lip as she dug into her bag, fishing out the crumpled letter that she'd held onto for months now. "This is part of it. And that—" As Faith continued on, Buffy noticed a chain and part of a jewel hanging out of Faith's opened bag. Without really asking if it'd be alright, she lent over and retrieved the chain. Faith found her words clogged in her throat as Buffy held the necklace.
"Where did you get this?"
"From Angel," Faith said, wanting to be honest. "He said it had something to do with combining the power of souls or something. Wesley has been researching this for months. Its part of the reason Angel and Spike haven't left yet."
"Willow's in England, too," Buffy realized, not tearing her eyes from the necklace.
"So is Tara." At Buffy's curious expression, Faith explained who Tara was. "She's Willow's suitemate and a good friend of hers. Not to mention she knows wicked earthly magic." Her eyes went to Buffy's curious expression. "Are you okay?"
"I've seen this before," she said, giving it back to Faith. "In a dream." She shook her head as though to clear it. "We should… we should let the others know what's going on."
"What do you mean?"
"I spent some time last night thinking and I think the battle is coming."
"As in today?"
"As in this week or maybe the week after," Buffy replied, glancing around. "I think they deserve to know. They wouldn't be here if it wasn't to help you, Faith."
"What do I—"
"That chain belongs to you, doesn't it?"
"It belongs to one with supernatural powers which could mean either one of us…"
"And I think it looked fabulous on you then," Buffy said with a quiet smile. Then, glancing back out over the lake, she added, "I think our friends should be here. All of them."
"I'll make the call."
"Good," Buffy said, turning back to Faith. With a deep breath, she held out her hand. "Truce?"
Faith stared at the hand. In her wildest dreams, she didn't think apologizing to Buffy would be this easy, but honesty did have its perks. She quickly slipped her hand around Buffy's and grasped the older girl's wrist. "Truce."
"For Harry?"
Faith felt her eyes tearing up as she realized what these words meant. "For Harry."
x-o-o-x
In the next chapter… it begins.
Author's Note: So, just so you can get a good glimpse into the dark side of Voldemort, I do have companion chapters to this one. The sections I wrote just didn't fit. The link will be in my profile. I also have one written of the students in regards to their reaction to Harry's "we are now an army" speech. Just in case you wanted to read a bit more into this world… I promise the next chapter won't be two weeks off, but it marks a milestone.