Author's Notes: Alrighty! I'm back yet again! First off, I'd just like to say thanks to everyone again, you guys are soo nice! And to Syakura, I was so touched by your review ^^, I mean it! It makes me so happy for someone to say that my work inspires others (and don't feel embarrassed or anything ^^), so it made me realize that my work does reach people somehow, I'm so happppy!
Well, it's 10 o'clock P.M, right now, and I'm really hungry and cold for some reason. But right now, to satisfy my hunger, I'm eating a homemade sandwich (you must think I'm weird, sandwich at ten o'clock, huh?), but I'm really, really hungry, my dinner didn't fill me up! I wonder why... Maybe the rice wasn't good?
So, you guys are annoyed with Sakura, huh? Well, I don't mind that you feel that way, but I never would've thought that you guys would think that she was some sort of bitch now (scuse my language), but I guess that's OK, because we all don't really know the reason why she acts the way she does. Alright, I could already tell that you're getting bored. Time to end my endless banter and go on to the real thing. Thanks for the reviews, guys!
Kero: Geez, A-chan talks A LOT.
Kiyone: Shh. She'll hear you.
Kero: Yeah, I guess you're right.
Kiyone: Anywho! Let's skip on down to those who answered last chapter's trivia question! Last time's question was: What is Spinel Sun's greatest love?
Kero: And because of MY influence, it was—dum, dum, dum! SWEETS! Yes, sweets! He's goes all hyperactive when he takes a bite out of one, and that Eriol dude thinks he hates it! Hahaha.
Kiyone: *giggles* Here's the list for the people who got it right! You guys are SMMMMMMMMART!
A CCS Fan
k707 of baca productionz
sakurakawaiicherry
CalumonMelodyEfuimon
Syakura
Angel Blossom
Glarie
Kero: Not that much people, huh?
Kiyone: A-chan thught it was going to be an easy one.
Kero: Not to blame! The stupid DUBBED version couldn't show the real Suppi and the real me! So, no worries! A-chan was wonderin' bout that, she was thinking that's why no one could answer it correctly.
Kiyone: Daijoubu! Someday, the subtitled ones will take over, moo hahahahaaha!
Kero: Kiyone, calm down.
Kiyone: Sorry.
Disclaimer: I do not own CCS or any of its characters, CLAMP owns them. Reiko, Yumi, Shiro, & Hiroyuki, are MY characters, and shouldn't be taken without permission. Ai Da Ne? Is my story, and shouldn't be copied or taken without my saying.
(Isn't It Love?)
A CCS Fanfiction ( CLAMP)
Chapter Three - Decisions
by, azngurL aka Lauren (A-chan ^.^)
As Sakura and Reiko got home, they both saw Yumi cooking dinner for her guests that night. When she heard the door shut, she immediately turned her head to see both Sakura and Reiko there. "Sakura, Reiko-chan, you know that Shiro-kun and his mother are coming today right? So dress out of those filthy uniforms and into something appropriate, now!" She commanded.
"Hai (Okay), Okasan," Both Sakura and Reiko said in unison as they headed upstairs to their rooms.
As Sakura entered her room, she quickly locked it, and sunk down in front of her door. Kero came out of hiding and flew over to her. "Sakura, daijoubu ka (are you okay)? What's wrong?" Asked he.
Sakura sighed and looked around her room staring at nothing... "As of now, Tomoyo and I ... are no longer best friends. Our friendship's done for, it no longer exists anymore... And it's really all my fault, because I'm not acting like a best friend anymore for her," She confessed while holding back her tears. "But I'm only doing it for my sake and hers. I don't want her to know what Okasan does to me, and what she could do to ruin all my relationships....,"
"Sakura....," Kero whispered.
Sakura got up and flung open her closet, taken out a short dress and throwing it upon her bed. She took her uniform off, and started to dress. As she got dressed up in a black short dress, she turned to Kero and sat upon her bed, being silent. Then she spoke, "I think... I have to .... tell Syaoran-kun that I don't love him, I guess I'll have to call off everything and make him hate me too," She said nervously.
"Sakura, instead of getting to think you hate them, you should just tell them," Kero said.
"But if I do, then they're going to try to do something about it! I can't let them hurt Okasan, Kero-chan! I don't want them to interfere with what she does!!" She cried.
"But why not!? She causes you enough pain!! Look what she caused you to do to Tomoyo!? And now to the Li kid!?!" He exclaimed.
"But it's only for their sake... I don't want them to hurt Okasan.....,"
"But why?"
"Because... Even if, she does cause me grief, she is also the wife of my father... Mother of two kids before, now three—me.... I think I'm lucky to even have a mother, right? If Otosan died and she wasn't here, then where would I be right now? ... I don't know if I love her, I'm just happy to have a mom... And... I don't want to take away Reiko and Hiroyuki's happiness away, it would tear them apart,"
"Sakura..."
The door bell suddenly run and Yumi called all of her children down to the dining room. There they saw Shiro and his mother, Saki, another beautiful youth, but with dark raven hair, slightly above her shoulders. She had black eyes, and a slim figure.
"Koban wa, Kinomoto-san (Good evening, Ms. Kinomoto). Koban wa, minna (everyone)," Shiro greeted while bowing his head.
Yumi, who was utterly excited, told everyone to sit down, and she ordered Sakura and Reiko to help her bring out the meals and place them on the table. As they were finish preparing, Sakura sat down next to Shiro, and Reiko sat down next to Sakura. "Let's eat!" They all said while they began their dinner.
During dinner, the phone suddenly rang many times, and no one picked up. Sakura looked at it and was about to answer, but Yumi stood up instead and answered. When she answered it, a disgusted face had suddenly ensued, and she said, "Sakura, it's for you,"
Sakura stood up slowly and
walked over to Yumi who whispered to her, "You no good child.
I told you that no one should ever call us during dinner, especially
if it's one of your cronies!" Then she left and sat
back down. Sakura remained silent and spoke to the receiver, "Hello?
Who is this?"
"Sakura," A deep voice suddenly said.
She recognized the voice and her eyes widened as she whispered, "Syaoran...kun...? Is anything wrong?"
"Of course something's wrong. Why did you do that to Daidouji?" He asked.
"What do you mean?" She asked.
"Argh, Sakura, don't act so stupid! Why did you suddenly call off your friendship? Why are you acting like you're drifting apart from her?" He asked.
Sakura turned her body so that nobody in the dinner table could see her sudden change of emotion. But Reiko was watching, and so was Shiro. She leaned against the wall and replied, "Why are you concerned? It's none of your business,"
"I know that, but, it wasn't really right to just tell her off like that!"
"Well, she shouldn't have brought up the subject in the first place shouldn't she?!" She asked, practically screaming into the phone. Everyone then turned to see what was happening with Sakura. Sakura noticed that they were then watching her, then she lowered her tone. "Look, I'm sorry, but I just can't be best friends with her anymore, Syaoran-kun, okay? I gotta go, bye," She hung up.
"Wait, Sakura!" He yelled over the other line. When he heard the click, he put it down slowly, then walked away. "Sakura, what's wrong with you..?"
Sakura put down the receiver and slowly walked back to the dinner. She bowed her head and said softly, "Gomen nasai (I'm very sorry), minna...," Then she sat down.
"Ah, daijoubu, Sakura-chan (It's alright, Sakura!)" Saki exclaimed. "Daijoubu! These things happen all the time!"
Sakura smiled at Saki, but then turned to her mother who looked very displeased with her. She knew that when Shiro and Saki were gone, that something was going to happen to her. As soon as dinner was over, Yumi had told both Reiko and Hiroyuki to disperse from the table and be somewhere else. Hiroyuki hurriedly went to his room, but Reiko stayed, hiding and eavesdropping from a distance.
Sakura
I wonder why Syaoran-kun is really concerned, I mean... It's not really his business to be butting in on what's happening between Tomoyo-chan and I... But, even if I don't ever wanna admit it to him—losing a friend really hurts. I sat down next to Shiro, and both Okasan and Saki-san sat in seats facing us. They looked rather serious really.
There was a moment of silence, and I felt uncomfortable in the atmosphere I was in at the moment. Shiro-kun didn't look like he was comfortable either here.
"Sakura, Shiro," Okasan suddenly started. "The reason why we've called you here together is because we have some important matters to discuss,"
Important matters? I wonder what's up, I wonder if I did anything wrong.
"Yes, Yumi and I have been planning this for sometime now, and I think now is time to discuss it since you both just turned sixteen," Saki then said.
Shiro stood up from his seat and yelled, "Well out with it already!"
He was really impatient, and I could see that he couldn't take the suspense any longer. I guess parents like to do this kinda stuff with the children before announcing something big, just to get our attention. But even I'm growing impatient...
"Shiro, calm down," Saki said while gesturing Shiro to sit down. I watched Shiro do as he was told to.
Okasan cleared her throat and said, "Well, since you're both sixteen, you're both practically entering adulthood... And, we are arranging a marriage for the both of you,"
I practically froze and I started to quiver. I couldn't move, I was numb. The last words that Okasan had said, We are arranging a marriage for the both of you,' just lingered into my mind. I was dumbfounded, and I didn't know what to say. I just sat there, almost ready to cry, almost ready to scream. "H-Hoe?!" I shrieked to myself.
I looked at Shiro and he had already lost his control. "WHAT?! HOW CAN YOU DO THIS!? THIS ISN'T FAIR, OKASAN (Saki)!? SHOULDN'T YOU ASK US IF IT'S ALRIGHT FIRST?!"
I couldn't help myself... I lost it too. I stood up screaming, "And besides!!! An arranged marriage shouldn't be even considered anymore!! I can't marry him, I don't love him!! We don't live in the olden days, we don't live in those times anymore! You can't do this to us, and we WON'T do it!"
I couldn't believe what I just said. I know Okasan will slap me for this... I looked at her, and it was as if she wanted to. But she controlled herself. I could just tell... I sat back down, not saying anything else. But when I sat down, I started to shiver again, and my heart started to beat rapidly. Shiro then too, sat down in his seat, very displeased.
"Yes, well, it would only be best, my son. It would be perfect for future generations to come!" Saki exclaimed, really excited.
They're only probably doing this for the wealth and money that future generations might produce from us. After all, Okasan came from a rich family, and so did Saki-san and her family. But, I don't know how people could be so cold-hearted. I just wanted to run, but I couldn't.
"Sakura, Shiro," Okasan suddenly started again, "This is already decided, and both of you cannot decide against it. Any further questions?" She asked.
I didn't bother to ask her anything, she would reject anything I would say... And I know Shiro knew the same. So we both remained silent.
"Good, then Saki and I will head off to the temple right now. Shiro, Sakura, take care of the kids while we're gone," Okasan said while standing up. Saki followed, and they made their way out of the door.
All
Sakura couldn't believe it, and a moment of silence arose between Shiro and her. But she didn't really know how to react, so she started to cry. "Oh my God, Oh my God...," She repeated over and over.
"Nesan... Oh my God... How can Okasan do this to you...?" Reiko thought from afar.
Sakura's crying suddenly got louder and Shiro placed his hand on her shoulder, whispered, "Daijoubuyo (It'll be alright), Sakura-san.... Don't worry... We'll figure out something, right?"
She didn't reply, she just kept on crying and crying softly to herself... Burying herself in her arms, as if she didn't want to face the world. Suddenly Reiko came out of hiding. "Nesan!!" She yelled as she ran to her sister, putting her hands on both of Sakura's shoulders. "Nesan... daijoubu ka...?" She asked softly.
"Rei...ko...?" Sakura asked herself as she slowly removed her face from her damp arms. She looked at Reiko, then nervously whispered, "It's not fair... It's not fair... It's not fair, Reiko!!! What'll I tell him!?! What'll I tell Syaoran-kun!?!" She buried her face with her hands. "I already told Tomoyo-chan that we couldn't be friends anymore, now Syaoran-kun... But what will... What will I tell him?!"
"Nesan, calm down...!" Reiko said nervously to her sister. Sakura looked up at her sister and kept on crying softly, so Reiko open her arms out slowly and held her. "Nesan..."
"....Syaoran...?" Shiro asked.
Reiko looked up at Shiro. "Her... Her... boyfriend," She said reluctantly.
"Boyfriend...?" Shiro asked.
"N-Not really... Not really... I don't know what to consider him... but a person who loves me.... He still has feelings for me, that's why he came back... that's why he came back....He left Hong Kong, just to see me again!" Sakura cried.
They all became silent, and then Sakura's crying turned into soft sobbing, and Reiko still held onto her. But then Sakura broke away from Reiko slowly and looked at the table. "What do I do...? What do I do... Reiko... Shiro-kun...How do you tell somebody you don't love them...? How do you get them to despise you...?"
Reiko and Shiro contemplated, but then Shiro replied to her in a calm tone, "... Just lie to them .... Sakura, just tell them plainly that—You don't love them, and they'll buy it... That's how people are... People are so naive, and so gullible nowadays...,"
Reiko remained silent, not saying
anything, but listening into the conversation.
Sakura looked at Shiro and asked, "...Do you think it would
hurt...? For me... and for him ...?"
"Of course it'll hurt... That's how Love is..," Shiro replied uneasily.
Tears welled up in her eyes again, and she leaned onto Shiro who took her into her embrace. "It'll hurt a lot... right...? Reiko ... Shiro-kun...? It'll hurt a lot... Not only for me, but for him... right? But, I'm only doing this ... just so ... just so ... Okasan would finally be proud of me .... and that ... she won't hurt Syaoran-kun... do you think ... it's right...?"
Shiro tightened his embrace on her. "Yeah, it's right... You're doing the right thing... I may not love you, but... don't forget... I'm always here for you. Remember that, okay, Sakura-san?"
"Nesan... You're so unselfish. You're doing this for both Okasan, and Syaoran... But all it does—is hurt you," Reiko thought as she looked at her sister. "No!!" She suddenly screamed.
Sakura and Shiro both looked at Reiko. "What...?" Sakura asked softly.
"Nesan, you shouldn't hurt yourself anymore! Don't do it just for Okasan or for Syaoran, do it for yourself! Keep your feelings for Syaoran, don't just throw it away!!" Reiko exclaimed. "You love him right!? Why throw it?! Why throw away your most precious feelings, Nesan!?"
Sakura froze, and said nervously, "I don't know... Because maybe.. I want Otosan to smile down at me and be happy and proud. Maybe because, I finally wanna be accepted by Okasan," She stood up and looked at Reiko. "I don't know how I'll manage ... I know that... I'm going to cry like hell tomorrow when I tell him, but... You and Shiro-kun will be there, right?"
Unexpected, Reiko started to cry. "But, Nesan! I care about you so much, I don't want you to be hurt!!!" She cried out suddenly. Reiko covered her mouth in surprise that she finally said it to her sister. "Nesan...," She whispered as she looked down at the floor.
"Reiko," Sakura said softly as she looked into her sister's eyes. "Arigatou gozaimasu (Thank you very much). Arigatou ... for being the first member of my new family... To actually care for me," She kissed her on the forehead, then walked over to Shiro. She bowed her head, and Shiro did the same. "I'll see you tomorrow. I gotta get some sleep. But, thank you for everything. We'll figure out something, right?"
Shiro smiled and said, "Of course. We're in it together. Just you and me, and Reiko. We'll figure out a way, Sakura, don't worry okay? I'm always here,"
"Arigatou," Sakura said with a smile. "Oyasuminasai (Good night)," Then she headed up the stairs.
Reiko looked at her sister who was hurriedly going up the stairs. "Nesan... Why don't you listen to me?"
As soon as Sakura got into her room, she shut the door. Kero got out of hiding once more, and saw a teary face across Sakura. "Sakura...?" He asked as he watched her fall into her bed, holding onto her pillow. "Sakura, daijoubu ka?!" Kero asked.
Sakura didn't say anything... She just kept on crying. Soon, Yumi and Saki had come back from the temple where they arranged the future marriage of both Shiro and Sakura. Saki and Shiro had left, and Reiko was sent to her room.
Sakura still laid on her bed, just sobbing to herself, being quiet, and Kero was trying to comfort her. But then, Yumi was walking up the stairs, and everyone on the floor could hear the creaks that she was making.
As she slowly crept up the stairs, Sakura's doorknob started to turn and Kero froze, pretending that he was a doll on Sakura's bed. Then Yumi opened the door, and slammed it behind her. Sakura immediately opened her eyes and got up to look at Yumi, teary-eyed.
"How dare you, you insolent child!" Yumi yelled with anger as she went face-to-face with her step-daughter. "Stand up! How dare you disrespect me! How dare you make a fool of me in front of Saki!"
Sakura slowly stood up, not looking at Yumi, not saying anything. "What the hell is the matter with you, Sakura?! A so-called friend calls you during dinnertime, and to make matters worst, you start screaming over the phone! What kind of person are you, huh!?" Yumi screamed while she slapped Sakura's face.
Sakura practically fell to the floor, holding her cheek, still not looking at her step-mother. She clumsily got up, and said, "You know, this isn't fair. What's you're doing to me isn't fair. I don't know why Otosan married someone like you,"
Suddenly a big blow came across Sakura's face, causing her nose to start to bleed all over her face. Sakura fell to the floor, and Yumi started to kick her with her sharp-heeled shoes, which soon caused her leg to bleed rapidly. "You no-good child! You stupid fool! I can't believe you! You dare to speak to me like that?!?! You know what, Sakura, I'm really glad that Saki and I are arranging this for you and Shiro. I can finally get rid of you when it happens!" She exclaimed hatefully.
Yumi then picked Sakura up by the collar, looking at Sakura's pitiful face with such disgust. "I don't know how Fujitaka tolerated with such a child like you. You are nothing, you're worthless!" She screamed, throwing Sakura back to the floor. "Now, don't disappoint me ever again!" She then left the room, slamming the door once more.
Sakura slowly got up with tears streaming down her face. But then she fell because of the bleeding on her leg that was just slowly gushing blood because of Yumi's heel. She winced at the pain and just stayed on the floor. Kero flew over to where she was with a sad expression, and put his small paw on her crying face.
The next day, Sakura and Reiko left early again. Sakura had bandaged her small wound that she got from Yumi, which was on her upper leg, so that nobody could really have noticed it with her skirt. As they started walking, Reiko asked Sakura, "Nesan, daijoubu ka?"
Sakura looked at Reiko and smiled. "I'm fine, don't worry about me,"
"But... Something was going on with you and Okasan last night, right? ...Did she...?" Reiko asked.
Sakura looked at Reiko, then at the floor. She slowly nodded her head. "Because of yesterday, there was blood all over my carpet. She kicked my upper leg with her heel, and started to bleed like mad... It still hurts too," She said.
Reiko became shocked and surprised. "Nesan, why don't you tell her to stop?!"
"Heh, do you think she would listen to me? Okasan hates me, Reiko," Sakura said with such ease. "And anyway, let's not worry about last night, okay? I got bigger things to do today, remember?"
Reiko became silent, remembering what Sakura was going to do today to Syaoran, and how she was going to tell him that she didn't love him anymore'. They got to school, and Reiko and Sakura both separated, going to their own classrooms.
As Sakura walked down the hallway of her school, she saw Tomoyo and Syaoran walking in the opposite direction. They noticed her walking, and when they got to the door together, they all stood still in front of the classroom door. Sakura looked at Tomoyo first, then at Syaoran. "Ohayo gozaimasu (Good morning)," She said while bowing her head to them. She opened the door and walked in.
"Sakura-chan.....,"
Tomoyo whispered to herself as she watched Sakura walk in.
Soon, it was lunch period for them. Sakura clumsily walked on
the pavement because of small leg wound. As she continued walking,
she couldn't find a place to sit because everyone had taken
it. She had no lunch with her, so it didn't matter if she
sat anyway, but she needed a place to rest. Then, she saw Tomoyo
and Syaoran talking together. Tomoyo seemed rather depressed,
and it was as if Syaoran was just trying to cheer her up.
"Syaoran-kun... You can't face me because of what happened yesterday...?" Sakura thought as she watched Syaoran talk to Tomoyo. "Tomoyo-chan... honto ni gomen nasai (I'm really sorry),"
All of a sudden, someone came up from behind Sakura and practically bear-hugged her from behind tightly. "Sakura-san!!" The person yelled.
Both Tomoyo and Syaoran looked at the person who had just yelled Sakura's name, and saw Sakura on the ground, with Shiro who was standing.
"HOOOEEEE!!!!! What's your problem, Shiro-kun!?" Sakura yelled angrily while gripping her thigh.
"Woah, gomen, Sakura-san! What's wrong, I always do that," Shiro asked while helping her up.
Because of the bruises she received yesterday, every touch that people made hurt. "Nothing.. Ow..!" She cried as blood started to trail from leg again. Shiro looked down at what Sakura was trying to cover up, and he saw the blood trail from her upper leg.
"Sakura-san, what happened?!" Shiro asked as he looked at her blood-covered hands.
Syaoran and Tomoyo both got up and ran to where Sakura was. "Sakura, daijoubu ka!?" Syaoran asked.
Not looking at him, she replied, "I'm okay. Don't worry about me," She slowly got up, but then fell towards Shiro who caught her. She breathed heavily and said, "Gomen...,"
"Sakura-san... What happened...?" Shiro asked her, still holding her.
"I'll take you to the nurse," Syaoran said while walking up to Shiro.
"It's okay, really, it's okay," Sakura said while standing up clumsily.
"Nesan!!!" Reiko suddenly screamed as she came running through the campus. As soon as she confronted her sister, she suddenly asked, "Nesan! I heard you screaming, what—" She suddenly stopped because she saw the trickle of blood flowing down her skin. "Nesan...," Reiko looked up at Sakura and looked into her eyes.
Sakura looked at Reiko too while wincing in pain. "Reiko,... please don't worry about me too. I'm fine. I just got cut on my upper leg while practicing today, that's all," She said with a discreet wink to Reiko. "I'm gonna go. But thanks for your concern, guys," She started to walk again.
As they all started to look at Sakura while she walked, Shiro turned to Syaoran and Tomoyo. "Why aren't you guys helping her? I thought that, you were her boyfriend, and you," He looked at Tomoyo, "...Are her best friend. Right?"
Syaoran got annoyed. "What's it to you?! You have no business to butt in! And what kind of relationship do you have with Sakura anyway?!"
"Oh... So Sakura-san didn't tell you anything yet?" Shiro asked.
"Tell me what?" Syaoran asked, confused.
"Shiro-kun, we should leave. Nesan looks hurt pretty badly," Reiko said while tugging on Shiro's sleeve, and eyeing him so he knew what really happened to her.
Shiro looked at Reiko and his eyes widened. Then he turned to Syaoran and said, "Look. I may not know you or whatnot, but Sakura-san has been pressured a lot lately by everything. Things aren't what they used to. I've known her since she was twelve, and let me just say to you to be grateful for what you have. And don't take advantage of anything," He looked at Tomoyo. "You too, Daidouji," He turned to Reiko. "Let's go. I gotta talk to you,"
Reiko bowed her head to Tomoyo and Syaoran and ran off with Shiro.
"What did he mean...? To be grateful? To not take advantage... of what?" Syaoran asked Tomoyo.
Tomoyo looked down at the floor. "Does he mean.. Sakura-chan?" She asked.
AN: Chapter 3's ovvvvva! Please R&R, it'll be greatly appreciated! Here's the preview for the next chapter, For the Sake of Love
preview from the next chapter, For the Sake of Love
Shiro and Reiko looked at Sakura and Syaoran, then at each other. "Nesan is still very much in love with him, it's really obvious," Reiko commented softly while watching the two of them walk away together.
"Yeah... I don't even think she has the courage to tell him that she doesn't love him. But, if she doesn't tell him, it could be also be for the best... I think," Shiro said.
"Really? Then Nesan doesn't have to say anything bad to him?" She asked.
"Who knows... Gomen, I was thinking outloud. It's all up to Sakura-san though,"
¤¤
Today's question isssss: What does Touya (Toya) mean?
(very, very easy!)
A: What a very long chapter! Oh well, I know you like long chapters! Please leave a review, thanks!