Dear You Who Read This,

This is a chain letter, a spam, a troll, and basically useless stuff stuffed down to your mailboxes.

I'm Ron. I read Mr. Flamel's letter and decided to use the beginning but with variations.

So…I'm Ron Weasley, the sixth son of the Weasley family. While I might look poor to you, I really am poor. But no one will ever underestimate my chess skills. I will PAWN every one of those who tried to beat me, because I am the KING of chess. There you go two chess pieces jokes.

Yes, yes, I understand. I am not unbeatable. Someone will defeat me, but at that time, I shall be Hogwarts Champion of Chess first. I will inspire young players, cute girls, and many others to play Chess. So I will give you a How-to NOT gets beaten at Chess.

How to Not Get Beaten at Chess

By Ron Weasley, the Boy Who Pawned All Others

Before starting, you had to:

1. Learn Chess' Rules.
A Knight can't simply 'move ahead one', you young unskilled players should know. If a bestseller writer wrote a bestseller story about young magicians who ordered the Knight to 'move ahead one', that writer must be sacked.

2. Have Chess Set
You can't play Chess with dead animals' body parts. A bladder stone will never be able to replace Bishop. Stop trying, Hagrid.

3. Know that Chess Required Common Sense and Logic to Win, Not Exact Knowledge and Trivia
In your face, Hermione!

Okay, if you have those three listed above, let's begin!

1. Understand the Importance of the Pieces
Queen was, is, and will always be the most important of them all. Protect your Queen as strong as you can.

2. Sacrifice
You had to do sacrifices. You will get in a position where you'll have to sacrifice your Rook to use your Knight to check mate the opponent. Do it. DON'T, however, sacrifice your Queen to make sure one of your Pawn get one space ahead than your Knight. When will Neville listen to this tip?

3. Don't Lost Your Focus
Losing focus in a chess game was like missing an ingredient when making Big Bang Potions; deadly. Stay focused to each and every chess pieces, and if you had extra set of eyes, it'll help. Seventh-graders should try to Transfigure their head to those of the Aliens.

4. Don't Ever, EVER Lose in Purpose
Chess was, is, and always will be a game of pride, strategy, wisdom, and pride. Never ever made stupid moves deliberately; it's like saying that there was a Weapon of Mass Destruction hidden in your house to that Muggle President. Deadly as hell.

5. Don't Play Chess as an Excuse to Stare at My Sister, Ginny Weasley
Dean, Seamus, and HARRY, I'm warning you. I even bolded, italicized, and underlined it, HARRY.

6. Keep Playing
Don't cry when you lose. Keep playing to sharpen your logic. Yeah right. Just keep playing against me, and while your logic was sharpened, I couldn't say the same to your dignity.

P.S: That one game DIDN'T count, Ginny!