A/N: OMG I'm so sorry for the late update! I didn't even realize I was taking this long with writing the chapter. Well finally I finished it, sorry about the long wait. I had a sort of Sasuke block for a little while.
Chapter 19: Last moments of privacy
It's night, it's still, Kakashi had once again talked to Itachi. Once again leaving me out, this whole week he hasn't said anything about the situation to me, and it's really making me angry. Though I was able to find out from my eavesdropping that Kakashi has permitted Itachi to stay, seeing as how close his eighteenth birthday is. But sternly he announced the moment he turns eighteen he'd have to leave. On top of that, in a threatening voice, he orders my brother to stay away from me, and that he would be watching. True to his word Kakashi is watching. Which only adds to my irritation.
When Itachi is upstairs in his room Kakashi can be found in his own bedroom, the door open so that he may hear if Itachi leaves.
At the moment I'm waiting, though it's futile for me to do so. Kakashi is on high alert, even at night he leaves his door open so that he may hear possible sneaking around. I'm surprised he hasn't taken the lock off of Itachi's bedroom door. All I know is that it's summer and my heart aches, being so near to my brother yet unable to be with him. I crawl under my covers, and stare up at the ceiling. Really what is irritating me the most out of this is Kakashi's actions when it comes to me. What does he think is going on? What does he think this situation is, between me and Itachi? Since he doesn't seem to want to talk to me, he obviously blames Itachi for everything. That or he doesn't want to believe that I would actually allow or want such a thing. Such a wonderful thing that has been taken from me, and I want it back. Or at least I want to be acknowledged. My eyes widen and I sit up in my bed as I realize what it must be that Kakashi thinks is going on. Molestation, he thinks I'm being taken advantage of, being raped. Why do things have to be twisted into things like that? Why must everything be sick? I know I'm young but, it's not like I don't know what sex is and the gap between mine and Itachi's age isn't that great. I could understand someone coming to that conclusion if Itachi were twenty one, but he's not even eighteen yet.
A bitter emotion comes over me, and I can't help but scowl at the door as if hoping my displeasure would magically reach Kakashi's ear. If I were a girl and not related in anyway to Itachi would he still draw the same conclusion? No of course not, because that relationship has some sense of 'normality' to it. I suppose me pouting about it will do no good. I lay back and try to relax, but don't feel sleepy at all. I reach for my locket and fumble with it, in that familiar way. The fantasy of being in my aniki's arms plays through my mind. I clutch my locket tightly, as if it would close if I did so, of course it didn't. Tomorrow I'll demand an explanation from Kakashi, I'll confront him. Yes, and I'm not going to play the innocent act, it takes two to tango as they say.
It was after a very uncomfortable dinner that I decided to confront Kakashi. I don't want to be treated like this whole thing doesn't concern me, I mean it's honestly ridiculous how Kakashi seems to think that if a word of this is said to me all my innocence would be taken from me. He's already too late for that, both types of innocence, my sexual innocence and my child-like innocence. I think back, and wasn't Kakashi the one who tried to heal me after my parents' death? Tried to maybe bring back a little bit of my innocence, seeing as I was too young to lose it. I suppose it was taken from me a little early. Maybe he's trying to protect my innocence once more, therefore making Itachi look like a horrible villain for kissing me.
"You wanted to talk?" Kakashi asks, sitting next to me on the couch. Itachi gives me a passing glance as he heads for the stairs.
"Yeah," I nod, trying to get myself out of my thoughts. Eventually my attention is full on the situation at hand, and I find that I have no idea how to start. "What's going on?" Is all I can think of to say, and my voice came out sounding a little irritated.
"What do you mean?"
"Don't act stupid. You're going around lecturing Itachi and shit, and haven't once talked to me," I say it all in a calm voice that just didn't suit my face expression or the emotions inside of me. I was beyond annoyed. Itachi is so close but far away, Kakashi seems to be oblivious to the love I have for my brother, and it's all damn well starting to piss me off!
"Sasuke," he starts out sounding like he's talking to a five year old who might not understand what he's about to say. "Stay away from your brother. Some people are just sick, and can't function right in normal environments."
"Oh, so throwing a person who 'can't function right' out onto the streets at the age of eighteen is going to help," I say sarcastically. I'm not in a good mood, and I'm not going to be nice. I could care less if Kakashi only has good intentions, he should keep his nose out of mine and Itachi's business.
"Itachi is my responsibility until he's eighteen—"
"So I shouldn't be surprised if I get thrown out at eighteen?"
"No Sasuke. I'm doing this to protect you. He's taking advantage of you," he says. "You're too young to understand fully what's going on, this is wrong, when you're older—" It's funny, Kakashi used to have sympathy towards Itachi, wanting me to give him a second chance, build a bond with him. But now that the bond is something that Kakashi doesn't see as right, he wants to break it and his sympathy is out the window.
"Whatever," I mumble, before taking to the stairs. I couldn't stand to listen to that crap anymore. To be honest I just wanted to go into Itachi's room, and lock him and myself in it. Too young to understand…love knows no age, and it knows no gender. Yet I wonder, does it know no relatives either? No, it doesn't care, love will let you fall in love with anyone, it's nature and people that care, that will twist it and try to ruin it.
Kakashi's vacation days are used up— can you believe he went as far as to us up the few vacation dayshe has, just to make sure Itachi kept his distance? — and with that finally came some privacy. I could tell Kakashi was un-easy about leaving me alone with Itachi, but he had no other choice. He wasn't allowed to take me to work with him, and I doubted he had any other ideas of what he could do. Either way he tells me in the morning that I should keep my distance from Itachi and that if anything happens to tell him. He'd call every couple of hours to check up on me, he promised.
"Sasuke please don't give me that look. Tell me if anything happens. This isn't love, he can't love you. It's just like I said, you're too young to understand, he can't function right. Please just keep your distance," with that he's off, grabbing his car keys he leaves to head to work. I felt angry, Itachi can function just fine. Why is it that just because someone thinks differently from another or does things that others can't understand, that they are called weird and are kept away from the general population? The moment I was sure Kakashi was gone and too far down the street to be coming back, I go up to Itachi's room. I give him a smirk, and come to sit next to him on the bed.
"I'm so aggravated. Kakashi makes it sound like you're some sick pervert," I tell him. He closes the book he was reading and gives me all his attention. I smile, but it doesn't last long. "What will you do when he throws you out?" I ask with worry.
"My inheritance should cover my college tuition, and I should have plenty left over for a down payment on an apartment, and a couple weeks rent." He tells me with confidence.
"What college will you attend?" I ask, wondering if his choice will take him far away from me.
"I applied for some colleges, mostly in state. But I was also looking at the local college here," he says. I want him to attend the local college, but I don't say anything, after all I want Itachi to get the best. Going to a state collage will look better on a job application then a local college. I hadn't noticed that I let out a sigh until Itachi spoke. "I would have left for collage once I was eighteen anyway," he tells me.
"Yeah but this just frustrates me," I tell him.
"I wanted to get custody over you," he tells me. "Once I had an apartment and a job, and was enrolled in part time classes," he tells me. I smile, and rest my head on his shoulder.
"You can still try."
"If Kakashi can prove that we had more then a brotherly relationship, I wouldn't be granted custody over you. On top of that I could go to jail. But I don't really see how Kakashi can prove so. Yet even the mention of it could make the court second-guess my intentions. Also with my having been in an insane asylum, and my medical record is hard to over look. They'll probably come to the conclusion that I'm not a suitable guardian," he explains. I sadden, and just close my eyes to let his words sink in. Being so close to him and being able to talk to him is pure heaven.
"What do you mean you could go to jail?"
"I found out what we're doing is wrong in the eyes of others, so much so that it is punishable by law. Of course me being the elder, I'd be the one sentenced. They'll come much to the same conclusion Kakashi has. That I tricked you, took advantage of you, and so forth."
"Oh," I say, somewhat concerned. Would Kakashi go as far as send Itachi to jail? "I have a say in who I want to live with," I tell him as an after thought.
"If you want to be put through court sessions, I can still try to be granted custody." I sit and think, looking at all the pros and cons. The thought of being separated from Itachi was horrible. But there was a risk. If Kakashi could prove our relationship was more than brotherly, or even if I slip and say something wrong when I explain why I would rather live with my brother, he could be put in jail. He'd be taken away from me for I don't know how many years. Then the stress I would put on Itachi if he did become my guardian. After all balancing a job and school isn't easy, I wouldn't want to be an extra financial burden. By the time Itachi would have finished up four years of college, I myself will be looking at colleges to enroll in.
"No it's fine," I tell him softly.
"Are you sure Sasuke?" I look up into dark eyes, he didn't want to leave me as much as I didn't want him to leave. I give him a smile and lean in to touch his lips with mine. There was no time to be shy, it seems, since our tongues were quickly coming together in a dangerous and supposedly sinful dance. I let out a moan, as I feel Itachi's hand on my cheek, tilting my head up just enough to dive his tongue into my mouth further. As our kiss gets deeper, my mind gets hazier with lust. The thought of being with my brother bodily was very appealing at the moment. I start to unbutton my brothers black silk shirt. The sound of the chains on his black and red embroidered pants told me he was helping me undress him. Soon after, those same pants were discarded on the floor. Then my shirt and pants followed suit.
At that moment we are interrupted by the phone ringing, I pick up, catching my breath before speaking. "Hello?" I question casually and it was as expected Kakashi, checking up on me. I reassure him I'm fine, lying to him when I say I'm downstairs looking through movies I may want to watch, and that Itachi's been in his room the whole time. Kakashi doesn't seem to be put any more at ease, but he does let me get off the phone. The momentary byes are exchanged, I turn off the phone and give my attention once again to Itachi. Just one last peck on the lips, and then we both reach for our cloths on the floor. The mood was ruined, with Kakashi's interruption. Still however, we both lay on the bed, I was happy to use Itachi as a pillow, and he didn't seem to mind.
"Why does he look at me like I'm too young to understand? I know perfectly well what I'm doing. You didn't trick me in any way."
"It's the only way he can understand Sasuke," Itachi tells me softly. I suppose it made sense. After all, it's just like what Itachi said once before. It's a natural human instinct to be afraid of what you can't understand. Too many people can't understand us, this. But they have no right to make it any of their business. The next minutes are quiet, neither of us feeling like talking. Instead we just lie close to one another. Soon this will all be gone. I won't be able to see my brother around the house. It may even be four years before I see him again. The future seems so unclear, and once again I feel the fear of the unknown. But for now, I simply listen to my brother's heartbeat. I close my eyes to relax.
My peace was soon interrupted once more by a phone call. "Hello?" I knew it was Kakashi on the other end.
"Sasuke I have some good news," he says. Which I highly doubt.
A/N: A little cliffhanger. Please leave reviews. And hopefully it won't take me too long to update again.