Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, they are the rights of their perspective owners, I am not involved with Superman Returns or the Superman comics or any other Superman franchise. DC Comics owns Superman. I am not making money from this work and no copyright infringement is intended.

Part 3 – only the truth will set you free

This would have been the perfect end to the evening, but he could not let another day pass without confessing. He knew only the truth would heal, and he could not begin a relationship with her, either as Clark or as Superman without telling her what a horrible thing he had done, without confessing his deceit.

"Lois, I have to tell you something." He said it simply, the ache of regret deep in his voice and his normally powerful confident stance weakened. He softly grabbed her shoulders and turned her so that her body was facing his.

He touched her chin gently and raised her face so she was looking him in the eye. It would be so easy to kiss her right now, to taste her lips again. The ache inside him was real, but he knew he could not.

The sound of her pulse quickening brought him back into the moment.

He took a step back from her, not breaking his gaze. His voice sounded broken "What I have to tell you will make you very upset and angry with me, and it will not be unjustified."

He inhaled deeply, "After I tell you this, I will do whatever you think is best. If you wanted me to I would promise to stay away from you, to stay away from Jason. I would keep my distance – I will do whatever it is you ask of me."

He knew as he said the words it was partially a lie. He would stay away from her and Jason if she asked, but he would never stop watching over them, protecting them.

She couldn't imagine what he could say to her which would make her so angry – didn't they just clear the air – Oh, wait he started off apologizing for something earlier and she cut him off.

"Jason needs you and I would never take that away from him."

She was on guard now.

"Please hear what I am saying, all of it. If I had known, if I had thought for one minute that you could be pregnant, I would never have left, I would have never had done what I did. I did this because I thought it would be better for you to not know, to not remember, us. I did what I did out of love, nothing less. I have regretted my actions every moment since returning. Since understanding what I did to you. I didn't know Lois."

She was scared for the first time in many years. She was frightened. She knew he was going to tell her something that she was happier not knowing.

A wave of anxiousness covered her.

Her voice was soft and confused, "I never thought I could be afraid in your presence, but suddenly I am terrified. What did you do to me?"

Although he had practiced this speech several times over the last few months, he knew no words would be adequate . He knew in order to heal, in order to move forward either together or apart, he had to confess his actions. He had to admit his failures.

"I took your memories. I made it so you would not remember us, to protect you, to free you of this burden. And then I left because it hurt me too much to be near you and for you not to remember us. Without you, I am alone. I went to Krypton in the hopes of finding others like me, perhaps learning about where I come from and who I am. Now I realize the decision was hasty and I should have asked you before I took your memories and I should have endured the pain. I should have realized home is where you are, and when I had you I was home. If I stayed even a few short weeks longer, I would have known you were pregnant. Lois, I am so sorry. I am so sorry for being weak, for being a coward, for not believing in you, for not believing in us, for abandoning you, for taking away your memories. I am sorry for everything."

She prayed what she heard was a dream. She didn't want this moment to be real. However, nothing in the last five years felt more real then this moment. She knew he was telling her the truth. She took hold of her anger, she took hold of her pain and lashed out at him.

"You purposefully took six months of my life away? I thought I was drugged. I thought I was raped. I thought I was crazy. I didn't know who the father of my child was? You took that from me . . .on purpose?"

He walked over to hold her, she was shaking.

"Take your fucking hands off me! Go to hell."

She started to walk into the water. Now the sun was reflecting a golden shine off the ripples in the lake. It looked to beautiful; the exact opposite of how she felt. Her insides had been torn out.

The air was thick with morning dew. She needed to be in motion, she needed to swim.

She felt him come up behind her, to comfort her, but she was furious and she knew she should have paused to consider her next actions, but she didn't, and she spun around and slapped him as hard as she could across the face.

It didn't take long for the pain to set in. Her hand hurt so much she almost had to laugh at herself for not considering the fact that hitting him would hurt her more.

But she was wrong. Although the physical touch of the slap didn't hurt him, its meaning and the intention behind the slap was not lost on him. The guilt took hold of him.

"Lois, let me see your hand" his voice was soft but commanding.

"Don't you dare touch me." The weight of the conversation crushed her.

Lois threw herself into the water and swam back to the dock.

He saw her safely to the dock before he flew away, the regret of the last five years weighing him down.