"What the shit!" Shouted Harry, gaping at the empty cup. It didn't seem to still be poissesed by Voldemort. "Why the shit did he send it to me?! And how the shit is he still alive?! And WHERE the shit is he now?! Shit!"
"Shit, don't worry about it." Said Hermione.
But Harry wasn't listening to her, he was looking at the bottum of the cup.
"U Can Save Them"
That was what it read.
Harry looked up at the words, back at Hogwarts, and then bakc at the words.
At last he understood.
His face went super pale.
"What is it, baby?" Asked Hermione, still all too drunk.
"Well, there is this one theory." Said Harry.
Hermione waiting.
And waited.
And waited.
And waited.
And waited.
And waited...
"Harry!" Said Hermione, at last. "What's your "theory"."
"What?" Asked Harry, "Oh, yes, that, ummm..."
He paused.
Hermione waited.
And waited.
And waited.
"HARRY!" SHouted Hermione, "I'm about to pass out drunk! WHAAAAAAAAT-IIIIIIIIIIIIIIS-YOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUR-THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!!!!... could you please tell me."
"Well," Said Harry. "It's kind of crazy sounding..."
"I'll try to understand." Said Hermione.
"Well..." Said Harry. "I'll try to tell you."
He hesitated.
Hermione waited.
And wait-
"JUST TELL ME THE CRAPIN IDEA!" Said Hermione, seeing where this was going.
"O-kay." Said Harry. "Shhesshcakes! I'll tell you, Ms. Unpationed!"
Hermione didn't bother asking what a sheshcake was and waited for Harry's answer. And she asked him again before the "And waited"s kicked in, again.
"Well," Said Harry. It's very complicated, so I may have to repeat it over and over again untill the day we dye of old age, because it's very hard to understand. Okay, here we go. Going now. Housten, we have lift off. Starting in three, two, one, zero, negative one, negative two, negative three-"
"Harry!" Shouted Hermione. "No. More. Build. Up. The. Next. Thing. I. Want. To. Come. From. Your. Mouth. Is. Your. Idea."
"Wow!" Said Harry. "You managed to put eighteen periods in one sentance!"
"NOW, HaRRy!" Said Hermione, coolly.
"Rab-"
"NEVER CALL ME RAB!" Shouted a recorder inside the Huffopuff cup.
"Sorry, rab-I mean RAB! RAB!" Said Harry. "Not ra-... just R.A.B."
The recording eased.
"Please continue" He respectfully said. "I would like to hear you idea and see if it's correct, my lightin' bolted friend."
Harry grinned. "Great idea! Let's be friends!"
"SHUT-UP!" Said the cup. "After having people for twonty eight years now use me as a chamber pot, I'm not the sort of person you want to make angrey."
"Of course, rat-I mean rab-No, I don't mean RAB, no... I do mean RAB, RAB."
Harry grinned timidly.
"Procede with your plan, young sir! OR I WILL KILL THAT STUPID DROPPING EVERY OTHER MINUTE MAKING OWL OF YOURS!"
"O-kay." Said Harry.
"And I'll kill that owl, anyway, if he pearches one dropping one me."
"Okay."
"PROCEDE WITH YOUR PLAN!"
"It's not a plan"
"WHATEVER! No! More! Build! Up! The! Next! Thing! I! Want! To! Come! From! Your! Mouth! Is! Your! Idea!"
"Wow! You managed to put eighteen eclamation poitns in one sentance!"
"Actuely, something like an eclanation point ends your sentance. But anyway, DO AS I COMMANT OR I WILL KILL YOUR BLASTED PENGUIN!"
"I have a penguin?! Boy, you know, there the latest fate right now. Every kid wanted an emperror penguin last year for chritmas, but since there an endangered species, they was a limited supply and some people died in the cold trying find one and."
"ENUOGH! It was a figure of speach. I ment you ugly owl!"
"She's not ugly! She's beutifful!"
"START TALKING!"
"Okay... wait, I just realized something. You managed to make eighteen sentances out of eighteen words!"
"Ah, shucks! But it was actualy only seventeen."
"Even cooler. In fact PERFECT!"
"That's enuogh! There's only one way to get you to cut to the chase!"
A jet of rainbow light it harry in the nose.
"IthinkRABwantsto-" Said Harry, very fast and in one gasp.
"No, slower, my poissesed friend." Said the cup.
"Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii... ttttttttthhhhhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkkkkkkkk"
"No! No! NO!"
There were sounds as though the Cup were were adjusting valume or something.
"I think." Said Harry.
"That's better!" Said the cup. "MUCH better! Proceed!"
Harry didn't say a thing.
The cup seemed to sigh and swair than floated over to where Harry was standing motionless and bonked him on the head.
"Owe!" Said Harry. "Ow-ow! OWWWwww. I think that RAB wants to have Voldemort's fallowers killed by me. And he knows that, to save the lives of the good wizards, I'll do it for him."
"That's it?!?!" Said Hermione after a pause. "That's your exstreamly complicated plan."
"Ohhhh..." Sighed Harry. "Being poissesed while drunk isn't very pleasent."
"That is my plan, by the way." Said the cup. "Well, actualy, it's RAB's plan. But since he poissesed me, it's my plan, too... kinda... in a way."
"Whatever!" Said Harry, and aimed his wand at the cup. "By greece, paris, good ol' NYC, and rome. Melt this thing, even if it's made of chrome!"
"I have served my purpos." Said the cup, as a puse colord bolt it him and he began to melt. "Is that you, old buddy? The Goblit of Fire, is that you?"
The cup died than completeley melted before he could say anymore.
"The Goblit of Fire's dead?" Asked Hermione, horrified.
"I guess so." Said Harry.
Just than the al new Hogwarts alert radio boomed:
"This just in: The Goblit of Fire has been stolen by a deranged House Elf named Hermy. Officers found the Goblet of Fire in pieces in a near by field along with a burnned up Hermy. Officers believe that Hermy ment to keep the goblit, but when in danger, the Gobet will automatically light a fire. Hermy probably destroyed the goblit to save himself, but was to late."
"Well," Said Harry, shrugging. "That solves that."
He belched from drinking too much.
"Well, that solves it!" He said, drinking all that was left of a beer can. "Tomorrow I'll gather up an army of wizard's and we'll march out to kill all the Deatheaters! Come morning!"