Broken Promises

Authoress: Cattsy (Catness)

Chapter word count: 1142 words

Chapter Fifteen:

'To be honest,' Hikaru thought to himself, a few moments later, 'I don't actually regret what I've done.' Hikaru looked into his brother's eyes for a few moments, his arm still stretched out, reaching out to hold him. Hikaru remembered when they were both younger, the way they'd hold each other at night. Sometimes they laughed and giggled in the darkness, joking about teachers and people they knew. Sometimes they cried and sobbed about depressing events and wondered why they were only friends with each other. They never needed anyone but themselves, growing up had shown them that the other brother was the only one they could trust. All others were cheats and liars and overall; not to be trusted. It was absolutely obvious now, that it had been wrong to join the Host Club in the beginning. Hikaru now knew, for sure, that they would both be better off if they'd never opened up to anyone but themselves. Sometimes they'd lied in bed at night, quietly. Those nights had been the best; at those times, they didn't need words to describe how they really felt.

Hikaru wished that they could just go back to those days. It was so much easier to hold his brother during times of monsters and dragons, knowing that he could protect Kaoru. However, it's so much harder to know that he couldn't hold Kaoru anymore; because Hikaru was now the monster.

'The only regret,' Hikaru thought, 'is that I destroyed my brother's future.' He knew that Kaoru had always dreamed about the fashion industry. He knew the Kaoru dreamt about becoming famous and successful. It wasn't all about becoming popular, though; Kaoru adored the different colors and styles. To Kaoru, the fashion industry was like multiple paintings that showed people feelings and flair. Kaoru often drew dresses in his math notebook, adding beautiful frills and lace to boring dresses. Hikaru adored his brother's designs. It was sad to know that Kaoru might not have a chance anymore. Hikaru knew that he'd especially destroyed Kaoru's chances with Sebastian; not just with his so-called apprenticeship. Hikaru considered the different ways that Kaoru found himself attracted to the older man. Hikaru had never actually thought about how his brother felt; all Hikaru knew was that he needed to protect Kaoru from monsters.

'Is Sebastian a monster?' Hikaru questioned himself quietly. The first time he'd actually seen Sebastian had been tough on him; Hikaru had been so worried about Kaoru. Fear had been rushing through his head about losing his brother. 'The kiss had been difficult to take in,' Hikaru thought as he studied the older man lying on the ground, still unconscious. The driver was currently trying to perform resuscitation. On any other day and person, Hikaru would have tried to help, but Sebastian was something like an arch-rival to Hikaru. 'I guess I was just afraid that I was going to lose my brother due to love.'

'The first time I met him,' Hikaru wondered jealously as he drew his mind back to the kiss shared between Kaoru and Sebastian, 'I knew I hated him, but I think I was just jealous that he was getting closer to my brother than I was. Every time I've seen him, he's been trying to take Kaoru away from me. I think that if I met him before the kiss, I might not have been jealous. Or perhaps I was just jealous because he could do things to Kaoru that would be wrong if it were me. I can't get closer to Kaoru because it's wrong to everyone. Everyone thinks that we should go our separate ways, drive ourselves further apart so we can go off and marry women and have babies.' Hikaru mentally sneered at the expectancies of society. 'I wish I could just kiss him once,' Hikaru mentally sighed, 'I wish I could have a chance to tell him how I feel without anyone to call him away or judge us on our relationship.'

Hikaru frowned and pulled his hand back to rest it on his knee, realizing that he would not be allowed to pull Kaoru into his arms, to a welcome embrace, like the old days. 'Sebastian makes Kaoru happy…' Hikaru thought, wistfully. 'Kaoru has always been happy when I've seen him around Sebastian. I think I should let them be together and wish them the best. All I can really do is to be there when, and if, it fails.'

Hikaru reached forward again, but not for Kaoru; he leant out to help Sebastian. He knew that he could at least try and help perform CPR. Kaoru snarled angrily and pushed Hikaru away, roughly. "Don't touch him!" Kaoru said angrily. It was now Hikaru's turn to draw back in fear; this was an angle of his brother he'd never seen before. 'Who the hell does he think he is?' Kaoru thought with an inward snarl. 'Attacking Sebastian… What the hell does he think he's doing now? Trying to perform CPR or something,' Kaoru thought with a tinge of sarcasm. 'He's been so annoying since the start, he's always found some way to try and intrude my relationship with Sebastian. It's just rude. He is so jealous that he can't find anyone decent to adore him.'

Kaoru shook his head with anger. "I hate you…" Kaoru muttered as he brought his head to Hikaru's level and met his brother's eyes with a sincere glare. A little twinge of guilt hit Kaoru, letting the boy realize that he didn't fully hate Hikaru. Over the years, Kaoru had managed to collect a lot of love for his brother. It had overwhelmed him at instances, letting him feel guilt and pity for his brother and letting him realize that he loved Hikaru more than he could ever hate his older twin. Feeling the guilt wash over, he realized that he'd probably forgive Hikaru when this was all over, hoping that Sebastian would forgive such an un-provoked attack. "For doing this to Sebastian…" Kaoru ended the sentence, lamely, knowing that he didn't hate his brother. However, he hoped that Hikaru would mature after hearing the past sentence.

For so many years, Kaoru had noticed that Hikaru was, more than, slightly self-centered. It had been his brother's main bad quality, apart from chewing his toe nails. Kaoru had put up with many long years of Hikaru expecting everything to go well. Kaoru knew that Hikaru always expected something to go right for himself, no matter what trouble it would cause other people. Hikaru needed to learn that it wasn't always going to turn out well; things were always bound to go wrong, but Hikaru never seemed to learn that. Kaoru knew that he would have to eventually forgive Hikaru, but only if Hikaru would learn to think of someone else but himself.

To Be Continued…

Authoress notes: Sorry that it has taken so long, but I've just been so busy recently. I'm working on the next chapter at the moment and I have some ideas about how I'm going to finish the story, but nothing solid so far. I'm a bit absorbed in my HIM fanfiction and icons at the moment, so I don't know when I will update next. However, please do keep in mind that I am working on it and I will try and have a new chapter done within a week or so and then a final chapter afterwards.

Cattsy…