Severus Snape gazed smugly at his reflection in the mirror. His reflection gazed smugly back.

His hair was cut, teeth whitened, and pores cleared. Granted, he was still not as beautiful as Lucius, but at least some improvement had been made. The rest of his attractive image would be in the attitude.

Severus made his way to the Great Hall for breakfast. The students gaped at his new look. Severus couldn't tell if they were absolutely enraptured by his beauty or just surprised at his sudden transformation.

Severus seated himself at the Head Table, next to Minerva McGonagall, ignoring her astonished expression.

"Severus! Whatever happened to you?"

"It was time for a change," Severus intoned silkily, letting the sex creep into his voice. It was all in the attitude. Sex, sex, sexy.

Severus pulled his shoulders back and tilted his head slightly, letting his hair fall attractively into his eyes. He let his eyes sparkle and burn. He was gorgeous. He was on a Harlequin romance novel...

McGonagall was concerned. First he had chopped off all his hair and now he was sitting ridgidly in his chair, shoulders thrown back, and eyes staring madly at God-knows-what.

"Are you okay, Severus?" McGonagall asked, carefully.

"What? I'm fine," snapped Severus. Merlin's arse. How was he supposed to concentrate on being a Sex God when Minerva was asking him all sorts of inane questions?

"Eat something," Minerva pushed, "You'll feel better."

Severus thought carefully about this. He really shouldn't be eating anything. His frockcoat was already starting to bunch around his middle. And he was supposed to be a dark personality, troubled by painful memories that plagued his dreams... How could he stomach food after all that? He was a starving artist. A starving artist sex god.

But, Merlin's balls, those buttered rolls were looking tasty. One or two couldn't hurt. Severus helped himself to the butter rolls, while noting student reactions out of the corner of his eye. A group of Gryffindor girls were giggling and kept glancing at him.

Positive results? Severus couldn't tell.

Potter was also watching him, suspicion evident on his features. Severus let his cool gaze meet Harry's. Sparkle and burn. Sex, sex, sexy. Harry's eyes narrowed and he turned towards his friends, leaning forward to tell them something.

Probably something about how drop dead gorgeous their potions teacher had become.

"Severus," Dumbledore had arrived at the Head Table and seated himself next to Severus, "I'll need to see-"

Dumbledore stopped. He had suddenly noticed Severus's significantly changed appearance.

"Oh. Severus."

"Yes," Severus looked at Dumbledore. Glitter and pierce. Sex Godddd!

Dumbledore frowned. Then twinkled. Then frowned a bit more.

"Erm... Yes. I was just saying I'd like to see you in my office this evening."

"Of course," said the Sex God and turned his attention back the butter rolls.

xxxxxx

At the Gryffindor table, Parvati and Lavender were discussing an interesting new development, i.e. Snape's changed appearance.

"Maybe he's trying to impress Trelawney," Parvati supposed, "I always thought they had a thing going on."

"They'd match. They both look like big, ugly bats."

"Snape does especially. Look at how he cut that hair! That ratty fringe, he's got now. Who would want him?"

The girls dissolved into a fit of giggles.

At the other end of the Gryffindor table, Harry was also speculating about the changes in Snape.

"Look at him! Someone probably saw him kill someone and now he's changed his looks so no one knows it's him!" said Harry.

"That doesn't even make sense. Maybe he just wanted a haircut," reasoned Hermione.

"He didn't just change his hair though," Harry said, "He whitened his teeth, too! Look, you can see it when he sneers."

"His pores look cleaner too," Ron added, helpfully.

To be continued...

xxx

Disclaimer: The Sex God and his supporting cast do not belong to me.