Chapter Twelve: We Can't Do This

Emma

"What's he doing here?" I asked my mom when Jay walked into the house with a duffel bag. His eyes were red like he'd been crying. He'd do anything for sympathy.

"Honey, Jay's going to be living with us," she said.

"WHAT?" I screamed. "You can't be serious!"

"Calm down," my mom snapped. She got really angry and it scared me. "His mom had to go live somewhere else. We're his family, so he's staying here. I don't care if you don't want him to; it's not your decision to make."

"Hmm, let's see. She probably went to rehab!" I crossed my arms over my chest and walked towards the stairs.

"Shut the hell up Emma! You don't know anything about her!" Jay snapped.

"That's not MY fault, is it?" I snapped right back.

"That's enough Emma," my mom said sternly. She turned away from me and lost all her anger when she looked at Jay. She hugged him tightly and smiled at him. "Snake and I will fix up the basement for you. Do you mind the couch until then?" she asked.

"Good, cause he's not getting my room!" I yelled before I stomped up the stairs to finish getting ready for school.

"Snake's taking the day off on Wednesday so we can go to your house and get everything. Why don't you stay home from school too and help," I heard my mom say before I slammed my bedroom door.

I called Craig and asked him to walk to school with me so I could vent. He assured me that everything would be fine and also said that I should be nice to Jay. I hung up on him and left before he even got out of his house.

Ellie

Last night was terrible. I never stopped crying all weekend and woke up Monday morning with a huge headache. The only good thing was that I was allowed to stay in Alex's bed with her both nights. She lay next to me the entire time I slept and kept me warm. I felt really safe, but I couldn't stop thinking about my mom.

My own mother—the woman who had given birth to me; the woman who told me she'd never stop loving me, no matter what—kicked me out of my house because she saw me half naked and making out with a girl.

I knew that she didn't like gay people, but a small part of me hoped that she would make an exception for her own daughter. I guess that small part was wrong.

Right after I got ready for school, I met Alex, Craig, and their parents in the kitchen for breakfast. It was the first time I'd left Alex's room since I got there around one in the morning on Saturday. They had such a great family that I got jealous really fast.

"Ellie, honey, are you okay?" Caitlin asked me as I played around with the milk leftover from my cereal.

"Yeah," I sighed, forcing a smile. "I'll be fine." Biggest lie of the century.

"You can stay here as long as you need to," Joey offered. "I can talk to your mom for you if you want. She didn't have very nice things to say to me last night, but maybe I can get through to her," he said.

"No, that's okay. I'll try to talk to her after school; hopefully she'll have calmed down by then. I have to go there to get some more stuff anyway."

"Do you want me to go with you?" Alex asked.

"I don't think that's such a good idea," her mom interjected. Alex made a face at her but I nodded my head.

"She's right. I can go alone, it'll be okay."

Manny

I unsuccessfully avoided Marco at school on Monday. He was waiting by my locker when I got to it.

"Are you okay?" he asked right away.

"Just skip hello," I said sarcastically. He leaned in and kissed me on the cheek.

"Good morning," he said.

"Too late," I rolled my eyes and opened up my locker.

"What's wrong with you?" he asked. "Seriously Manny, just tell me what's wrong. I want to help."

"I want you to leave me alone, and you're not! That's what's wrong," I yelled suddenly. I looked around to see if anyone heard me, but thankfully, no one was around.

"What did I do to make you act this way?" he asked.

"You're smothering me." I'm pretty sure it was our first fight since we'd gotten together a year and a half before.

"How am I smothering you? I left you alone all weekend after you wouldn't tell me why you ditched me. I want to know what's going on. Manny, I love you and if something's wrong I want you to tell me so I can help you."

"You can't help me so just FUCK OFF!" I screamed.

"Why are you being such a bitch?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at me. I could tell he was really upset and confused but I didn't have the patience for any of it.

"Because that's who I am," I said, slamming my locker and walking away.

"What's up with you and Marco?" Ellie asked me on the way to our math class.

"Nothing's up; why do you ask? I lied.

"Bull shit Manny. The two of you are usually making out in the middle of the hallway every time I turn around, and now you're both avoiding each other," she said.

"He's just gotten so clingy lately and I told him I needed a little space, that's all."

"Oh," she said, apparently buying it. We stopped outside the classroom to keep talking; we had a few more minutes until the bell.

"What's going on with you?" I asked, turning the conversation around. "Why are you so upset?" She sighed, and then looked down at the floor. When she looked back up at me, she had tears in her eyes. "Ellie, what is it?" I asked, suddenly very concerned for my best friend.

"My mom kicked me out," she whispered, letting the tears spill over.

"Why would she do that? You're a good kid. Did she actually have a reason?" I asked.

"She walked in on me and someone else. We were half naked and making out, and she flipped out," she explained.

"But why? People make out; people have sex. I can't see why your mom would kick you out just for that. Ground you, maybe; but kick you out?"

"It was because of the person I was with."

"Who was it?" She paused for a minute. The bell rang and she tried to move around me but I grabbed her arm.

"It was Alex," she said quietly—so quietly that I almost didn't hear her.

"Alex who?"

"Jeremiah."

"But El, that's a girl," I said. What was she talking about? She nodded her head and it hit me. "You're a lesbian?" I hissed.

"I'm bi, okay?" she snapped.

"What the fuck Ellie? Why didn't you tell me?" I nearly yelled.

"Girls! Class already started, in case you didn't notice," Mr. Armstrong said from the doorway. I ignored him and glared at Ellie. I leaned forward to whisper in her ear.

"Did you know that when you kissed me a long time ago?" I asked.

"Girls."

"Because that's really messed up if you did," I said when she didn't answer me. "I can't believe you!"

"Do you want a detention?" Mr. Armstrong asked. Ellie suddenly stormed off, past me and the teacher. "Ms. Nash!" he called after her. "Get into the classroom," he said to me. I watched as he tried to go after Ellie.

"I'm gonna be sick!" she yelled, completely faking it. He turned around and I followed him into the classroom, feeling disgusted.

Craig

"Do you get it now?" I asked Spinner. It was our fifth tutoring session and we were holding it at his house instead of mine. I'd filled him in on the Ellie situation since they were friends, and told him that she probably needed some alone time. I thought that tutoring would be really boring, but I found out that Spinner was actually fun to hang out with. Friend number three.

"Yeah, I think I do," he said. He started writing the problem out on his paper. When he finished, he slid it towards me. "How's that?" he asked.

"That's actually right," I said.

"Don't act so surprised that I'm smart," he joked.

"Don't be so sensitive, gay boy," I said. I was only joking too, but he got off his bed and walked over to the window. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean it like that. I love gay people! I was only joking around."

"It's okay," he sighed. "I guess I am a little over sensitive. Do you want to take a break and go outside? It's too nice to sit in my room all afternoon."

"Sure." I stood up and walked to his door.

"Hey Craig," he said when I had my hand on the knob.

"What?" I asked, turning around. He was right behind me.

Before I even knew what was going on, his lips were pressed to mine. I let him kiss me for a moment before I realized what was happening. Then I shoved him off me.

"What are you doing?" I yelled.

"I thought that…" he trailed off.

"I have a girlfriend!" I yelled. "I'm not gay! And I'm not your tutor anymore either," I told him, leaving the room and slamming the door behind me.

I was thankful that he didn't try to follow me. I got out of his house as fast as I could; quickly thanking his parents for letting me come over. As I walked down the street, I turned around and looked into his bedroom window. He was looking out of it, watching me walk away.

Jay

"I think it's time that Emma met my mom," I told Spike while I helped her get dinner ready.

"Are you sure about that?" she asked me.

"Yeah, I really am."

"Okay. We'll have to work something out then."

"Talking about me again?" Emma asked as she walked in the room. I rolled my eyes and walked past her to get napkins to put on the table.

"Emma, the next time Jay visits his mom, you're going with him," my aunt said.

"No, I'm not," she protested.

"This is not debatable," Aunt Spike sighed.

"Whatever. I'm sick of you taking over everything, Jay," she snapped at me. She left the room before her mom could yell at her.

"I'm sorry Jay," she said to me.

"It's okay, really. She just doesn't understand. Give her some time," I said.

Alex

Joey told me all the crap Ellie's mom said to him on the phone the other night. I felt horrible that I'd gotten all of us into this situation. My relationship with her was bittersweet. I couldn't completely comfort her since I didn't really know what she was going through.

Ellie's mom said that I corrupted her and I forced her to take her shirt and bra off. She said I was disgusting and I needed to be dealt with properly. She also told my dad that he must have raised me wrong if I turned out gay. I couldn't believe how ignorant she was. It made me sick to my stomach just thinking about it.

"Hey," Ellie said softly from the doorway. I looked up and smiled at her as she joined me on my bed. She sat next to me; our knees touching.

"How'd it go?" I asked as soon as I realized she must have gotten back from her mom's house. "Did you leave your bags downstairs or something? Joey said you'd have to stay in the family room on the pullout. Or you could have my room and I can sleep there."

"Alex, slow down," she said.

"Sorry." I knew I was talking too much, but it happened when I was really nervous. "I know this is really hard for you and I can't help but think that it's my fault. I'm just glad you're here with me."

I leaned forward to kiss her but she pulled away. Suddenly, our knees weren't touching anymore. My stomach flopped.

"What's wrong?" I asked. I reached up and ran my hand through her hair but she turned her head away from me.

"I'm not staying," she whispered.

"What? Where are you gonna go if you're not staying here?" I asked.

"Back home," she told me.

"Really? Your mom wants you back? That's great Ellie," I said, wrapping my arms around her and hugging her. She didn't pull away but she didn't hug me back, either.

"Yeah, I guess it is. But..."

"But what?" I asked. My stomach started to flop around again.

"She told me that I could come home as long as I stopped seeing you."

"And you agreed?" I asked, hurt.

"Alex, she's my mom. I can't lose her. I can't feed off of your parents when I have one of my own who's willing to take me back."

"But you can lose me, right? Do you even care about me at all?" I asked, tears running down my cheeks.

"Of course I do; that's why I'm doing this!" she protested.

"Bullshit Ellie. You did this for yourself!" I yelled.

"Alex…"

"Just go! Go back to your bitch mother who doesn't give a shit about the person you really are!" I screamed.

"I'm sorry!" she cried.

"LEAVE!"

A/N: The next chapter will take place on Saturday of the same week. I have a lot of stuff to add in here so I'm not sure how many chapters there will be. I'm planning on thirty right now, but that could change. Thanks for reading and let me know what you think!