Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling, not me.
A/N: Not much to say today, just that I hope you all like this chapter. Enjoy!!
Chapter 13: Need to Escape
The first thing Hermione saw was darkness a complete pitch blackness accompanied by an all-consuming pain that throbbed at every nerve ending in her body. In her head, the pain was so intense that she felt it would burst through her skull at any second. The pain was so great that she could not even cry, the throbbing agony forced her tears to remain unshed; leaving them to drown her spirit within her. In a valiant effort to ignore the pain, Hermione tried to focus on her surroundings. That was when she realized that her eyes were still closed; 'the pain must have woken me up,' she thought. But she could not remember falling to sleep. The last thing she could recall was waking up to find Bellatrix Lestrange standing over her and then torturing her. But after that it was blank. She was quite certain that Bellatrix had tortured her, but she did not think that was what the pain was from, nor did she think it was the reason why she had passed out.
She clenched her teeth and fists, and forced herself to relive the memory of what had happened after Bellatrix. At first all she could remember was pain, she knew that she had been tortured again, but this time the torturer was not quite human, and beyond evil. In a flash, she saw the blood-red snake eyes of Lord Voldemort and in that moment, it all came back to her. Everything that Voldemort had said and done to her up until the instant her head made contact with the wall and knocked her out. She had no idea how long she had been unconscious, nor did she have any way to tell for sure.
But that was irrelevant at the moment. What mattered now was that she was conscious, and even more important than that, she was alive. As long as she was alive and conscious, she had a shot of making it through this. However, in order to make it, she would have to be able to see what was going on around her, and that would require opening her eyes. Normally that would have been quite simple, after all, one rarely consciously thinks about opening their eyes once they awaken, it just happens. In her present condition however, the mere thought of opening her eyes increased the pounding in her head. Still, she did it, but the sight that greeted her was not a comforting one. At some point, during the hours she had been unconscious, she had been moved to a new location.
This place was musty with a definite stench of mold and neglect resting in the air. The concrete floor was cool and layered with a thick blanket of dust. It looked like a very large, old basement. There were small stacks of boxes piled off to the side, and a pretty old couch against one wall. Other than that, the room was pretty much empty. There were no windows on any of the walls, so Hermione guessed that she was underground. Hermione could just make out the shape of footprints in the dust in front of her. From the looks of it, whoever brought her here had apparated with her, left her on the ground, and then walked away leading Hermione to suspect that they could still be somewhere in the house.
As she was scanning her surroundings, Hermione realized that there was no shimmering silver mist surrounding her as there had been before. As a matter of fact, there appeared to be nothing stopping her from getting up and walking away whenever she pleased. She tried to calm the instant leap of hope she felt in her chest because the logical part of her knew that it was too good to be true. Still, she had to try, it was worth whatever may happen to attempt an escape. Never mind the fact that she did not have her wand, or the fact that she had no clue where she was or how to get home. She refused to sit around an be Voldemort's prisoner any longer.
So, she took in a deep breath; the pounding in her head was diminished by her relentless determination. Thoughts of reuniting with her friends and being held tight in Draco's arms fueled her drive. She stood, ignoring the stiffness screaming in her joints; she allowed nothing to stop her or force her back down. 'So far so good' she thought once she was on her feet. Cautiously she took a step forward, her entire body shook with pain but other than that, nothing prevented her from moving forward. She took another step, and still felt nothing stopping her.
Hermione's heart began to race with excitement. Wild thoughts that Voldemort had left her for dead, and therefore hadn't bothered to secure her flew through her mind. Never before had she thought that the idea of someone wishing her to be dead would be a good thing, but at this point she was praying for it. She took two more steps and was ready to dash ahead and cry out with joy when she was suddenly held back. It was as if an invisible chain was wrapped around her middle, allowing her to move only so far before yanking her back and reminding her that she was still a prisoner.
"No!" she cried in desperation, she attempted to run to either side, but the spell held her back. Hermione dropped t the floor with a defeated sob, she had been so close; she had believed she was free. But now, to find that she was still a prisoner was heartbreaking. It left her feeling nothing but despair and helplessness.
The sound of a door creaking open caused Hermione to wipe her eye and compose herself. She was not about to allow Voldemort or his Death Eaters to see her in such a vulnerable state. She stood in tall defiance as she listened to the soft thud of footsteps descending a stairway and then walking towards her.
"Thought you could escape mudblood?" Bellatrix Lestrange taunted the moment she laid eyes on Hermione.
Hermione set her face with the blankest expression she could manage. She could not think of an appropriate retort, so instead she opted for a cold silence.
Bellatrix however, was not to be so easily put off. She began to stalk back and forth across the room, just beyond the point where Hermione could go. This enraged Hermione far more than Bellatrix's verbal taunts, and Bellatrix knew it. The Death Eater grinned maliciously and chuckled at Hermione bound by invisible chains. Hermione was itching to lunge forward and wring Bellatrix's neck, but instead she had to settle for glaring at the woman with her fists clenched.
"I suppose you are wondering why I am not torturing you right now," Bellatrix goaded.
Hermione paused in her thoughts, she had been so consumed by her rage that she hadn't even stopped to wonder Bellatrix was there, let alone wonder why the Death Eater wasn't torturing her. Now however, she realized just how out of character it was for Bellatrix to be taunting instead of torturing. She really did not want to know what the vile woman's reason for coming was because Hermione knew that whatever the reason she was not being tortured now, it would mean something much worse for later on.As if to confirm Hermione's thoughts, Bellatrix spoke up once more. "the reason is because the Dark Lord is eager to be finished with this mission, and he wants to be sure you see the results of his handiwork on your cursed friend Potter. Bellatrix paused for effect, "I on the other hand, cannot wait until I can punish my traitorous nephew. So much talent and power, wasted, because of you!" Without warning, Bellatrix smacked Hermione across the face.
Hermione was taken by surprise by the sudden stinging sensation on the right side of her face. But that wasn't what startled Hermione the most, what really caused her heart to race was the thought of what Draco's devil of an aunt would possibly do to him. Or what she would do to Hermione in front of Draco.
"I can just imagine the look on your face when you are forced to watch him being tortured to death-"
Hermione forgot about the magic binding her as she charged forward towards Bellatrix, but just before she was within reach, the invisible chain magic forced her to stop. She was wrenched backwards so hard that she fell to the floor with a loud thud and a pained grunt.
"- priceless, I'm sure," finished Bellatrix. "And it will all be because of you." With that Bellatrix stalked away; leaving Hermione alone on the floor grasping her ankle, which was now sending shooting pains up her leg.
Again she felt the desire to cry, this time however, she did not allow herself to give in. This time she forced herself to stay strong and brave. 'Come on Hermione,' she began a mental pep-talk, 'you were not a Gryffindor so that you could cry when things got tough. And you were certainly not the smartest student in your year so that you could give up! You can save yourself…just think!'
Hermione took a deep breath and began to do what she did best, analyze. "Okay," she said aloud, "I'm somewhere, in a basement, with some sort of invisible chain spell keeping me here. So first things first, how to get this spell off me."
Hermione had never really practiced wandless magic before, at least not extensively, and even with the minor spells she had tried, her wand had always been nearby. Hopefully she had enough power within her to break the spell on her own, because that was the only way she'd even have a chance of escaping. So, she slid over to the wall and began to mentally recite every anti-jinx and counter curse she had ever heard. All the while hoping that one might be able to remove the spell keeping her captive.
- - - - - - - - - -
The tension in number 12 Grimmauld Place in the days following Hermione's disappearance was so thick you could cut it with a knife. Draco never spoke to Harry or Ron, and they returned the favor, nevertheless, you could feel the enmity between them whenever they were in a room together. It seemed like without Hermione's actual presence, the boys returned to their past hatred of one another. It did not help that they blames each other for what happened to her.
Draco was certain that Hermione would have never been in danger had she not been in the Order and so friendly with Harry and Ron. They, on the other hand, believed that it was somehow Draco's fault that she had been discovered and captured. The other members of the Order all felt the tension as well, however since the young men had thus far been silent and behaving themselves, no one intervened. Clearly, some rivalries never die.
Draco's patience had been on its last resolves for over a day. So now, as he sat in the meeting room listening to Dumbledore, Moody, and Lupin rehashing the same plans they had made days ago, he could feel that last thread of his patience fray. He was so sick of this mindless planning. They could be torturing Hermione ever second that they wasted sitting around making useless plans. Draco had had enough sitting around, he was furious with himself for agreeing to Dumbledore's offer. Draco was certain that is he was on his own, he would have at least been able to find her by now, if not save her as well.
But no, instead of being out there doing something useful for Hermione, he was stuck in this hellhole with a house full of people, n one of whom even wanted him there in the first place. Perhaps that was part of the reason why he stayed, just because he knew how much his mere presence pissed off everyone other than Dumbledore. Of course the main reason for staying was because he wanted to save Hermione, and he didn't want anyone to think he was giving up, or a coward for leaving. So he stayed, but that did not mean that he had to enjoy it. With a heavy sign, he tuned back into the conversation just in time to hear Weasley's mother's objections to Dumbledore's plans.
"I still think that Harry and Ron should stay here at first," Mrs. Weasley said. "That way if it is a trap and Hermione is not there, they will still be safe."
Draco let out an un-amused snort, which drew disapproving looks from several Order members, including Mrs. Weasley. Draco hadn't failed to notice that she had not raised any objections to Draco being the first to go. Draco didn't bother to point this fact out because he already knew what she would say; that he had to be the first because he was the one who would know where the Dark Lord was. But Draco knew the real truth, he knew that Weasley's mother did not care if he was safe or not. Hell, Draco would even be willing to bet that she would not be sorry to see him all but dead at the end of all this.
Harry and Ron began to wildly protest Mrs. Weasley's objections. Honestly, Draco didn't know why they had bothered, everyone knew they were going to do whatever they wanted anyway. They always had, and they'd always gotten away with it. So why were they wasting everyone's time by putting up this big show?
Mr. Weasley sided with his wife right away while Moody, Lupin and Tonks tried to reason with both sides. Dumbledore was the only one who remained silent and who watched as Draco wordlessly get up and leave the room. Unlike the rest of the Order, who felt that Draco was just making things difficult and uncomfortable for the rest of them, Dumbledore was impressed by how cooperative Draco had been since he'd arrived. Sure, it was clear to everyone that Draco was not pleased with the situation, but for the most part, after the first day, he had remained silent. Dumbledore rose and slipped out of the room as well, he was curious to see where Draco had gone.
- - - - - - - - - -
Draco couldn't handle this place anymore; he had to get out of the house and away from those people, even if it was just for a little while. It wasn't like they could save Hermione without him. After all, every plan the Order came up with began with Draco's mark burning and him telling them where the Dark Lord was, so they wouldn't miss him for a few minutes. At least that was what he told himself as he walked through the hallway and out the front door.
The cool air hit him like a munch needed slap in the face the moment he opened the dor. Instantly he felt better. The cool air brought relief; relief from the suffocation he felt inside that dreaded headquarters. He could not believe that Hermione had actually lived there with those two idiots, how could she stand it?
Draco started walking down the road; he had no idea where it led to, or where he was, but it didn't matter as long as he was moving in the fresh air. But he couldn't relax, something didn't feel right, he felt like he was being watched again. How anyone could have found him here in the middle of nowhere with all that protection around that bloody house was beyond him. As he glanced to either side, he slipped his hands into his pockets and wrapped his fingers around his wand.
He heard something behind him and he whipped around, drawing his and as he did so. But it was on ly Dumbledore, the old man looked amused as Draco lowered his wand and returned it to his pocket. Draco did not say a word or make any movement to return to Grimmauld Place. For several moments, the two men stood just looking at each other, Dumbledore with a small smile on his face, and Draco with a cold frown. Finally, Dumbledore spoke, "be sure to return before it gets too dark Draco."
Draco's expression did not change, but internally he did a double take. Had the old man just referred to him by his first name? That was a first, part of Draco felt he should refuse to allow the professor to call him by his first name, however deep down he understood that Dumbledore had meant it as a sign of respect. He referred to everyone else in the Order by their first names, so why not refer to Draco that way as well. Draco realized that he had not yet acknowledged Dumbledore's words, so he gave a curt, but definite nod before turning on his heel and resuming his alk down the road. He was actually a tad grateful that Dumbledore had followed him and in his own way, given Draco permission to leave. Not that he felt he needed permission of course, but still, it took away every ounce of guilt that may have somehow found its ay into Draco's mind. He felt free, and he liked it.
- - - - - - - - - -
Dumbledore retuned to the meeting room just as the argument was winding down. No agreement had been reached, but everyone was tired of arguing about the same issues over and over again.
"I'm just thinking about your safety," insisted Mrs. Weasley.
"And we're just thinking about Hermione," stated Ron.
"Well, Hermione would want you boys to stay safe as well," was Mrs. Weasley's final word on the matter.
Harry and Ron shook their heads at Mrs. Weasley, but allowed the issue to drop. That was when Harry glanced around the table and noticed that Draco was conspicuously absent, "Hey, where did Malfoy go?"
"The other Order members, with the exception of Dumbledore, looked around at each other shrugging. None of them had even noticed Draco was missing until then.
"I can't believe the bloody git just left in the middle of our meeting!" exclaimed Ron. "And we're supposed to rely on him?!"
Harry and Ron both pushed away from the table, and made their way towards the door. Lupin and Tonks stood to follow the boys out as well.
"Where are you going?" asked Dumbledore.
The four stopped in their tracks, and Lupin spoke for all of them. "We need to find him don't we?"
"We should have just locked him in one of the spare rooms and taken away his wand," muttered Harry, "that way he wouldn't be able to go anywhere.
"Do you really feel that would have been the best action?" asked Dumbledore.
"Well, it would have shown him that he's not in charge here, and that he can't just walk out of an Order meeting whenever he wants. Plus, what if Voldemort summons the Death Eaters? Malfoy will probably just go there himself without telling us. Then he'll get killed and we'll never be able to save Hermione!"
"I have to disagree with you Harry. And I believe this is the perfect time to discuss this matter because I am very disappointed with how it has been handled up until now."
"What matter is that?" asked Tonks.
"I will get to that in a moment Nymphadora," replied Dumbledore. He then stood in silence until everyone had returned to their seats.
"Now, to address your first concern Harry, I am confident that if Voldemort contacts his Death Eaters, Draco will let us know immediately."
"But Professor-"
Dumbledore raised his hand to silence Harry. "If Draco had any intention of trying to rescue Hermione on his own, then he would not have accepted my invitation into the Order."
"That may be so Dumbledore, but it doesn't change the fact that he has no respect for the rules of the Order, as he demonstrated by leaving just now," reasoned Mrs. Weasley.
"On the contrary, I believe he respects the rules as much as he can, and considering how he's been treated by the individuals in this room, I am impressed with how he has handled himself thus far."
Harry and Ron gaped at Dumbledore as if he had just grown a second head, they appeared to be too stunned to speak.
"Everyone in here seems to feel that Draco should be on his hands and knees serving the Order. But surely you can all understand what a sacrifice it was to his pride for him to come here. And you certainly cannot expect him to behave any differently than he is behaving, when not one of you shows any respect for him.
"He acts like he's the only person who cares about Hermione!" argued Ron, "but we all care for her too, and we've cared for her a lot longer than he has!"
"Did you ever stop to think that perhaps he acts that wasy because she is the only person that he has ever deeply cared for?"
A look of taken aback surprise crossed the faces of several Order members.
"And you should also consider the fact that every one of you is surrounded by people who care for you and who love you. Draco has never had that, the only support and love Draco has ever known has been with Hermione. I would like for all of you to keep that in mind when Draco returns, and treat him with a little more respect. I'm sure it would make Hermione very happy."
Silence followed Dumbledore's speech, no one looked at each other. Instead they all reflected on Dumbledore's words and their behavior over the past few days. They sat that way until they heard the front door open and close. Everyone stared at the door, expecting to see Draco, but instead it was Kingsley who walked inside.
A sigh, which suspiciously sounded like one of relief, passed through the entire room. The odd greeting caused Kingsley to stop and raise a brow, "it seems as though I have missed something," he remarked.
"We were just having a discussion about Draco," explained Dumbledore. "We thought you might be him; though I do not expect him to be back for quite some time."
"I see. Where is he? I hope there's no problem," Kingsley shot a quick glance at Harry and Ron.
"I believe any problems there were will have resolved themselves by the time Draco returns. As for where he's gone, I do not know, however I believe some fresh air will do him good."
Kingsley nodded, "yes, it will be god for him to get away for a few hours."
- - - - - - - - - -
Draco walked down the street for so long that he lost track of time and distance. He could not see number 12 Grimmauld Place behind him, nor did he see much ahead of him. He felt completely lost, not so much geographically as emotionally, within his life. Part of him wanted to turn around and shut himself in Hermione's room just so that he could feel closer to her. But another part of him wanted to stay as far away from Grimmauld Place as possible for as long as possible. But he had to go somewhere, hopefully where he wouldn't feel so isolated, which immediately removed the Manor from his options. Thinking as hard as he could about where to go, he dissaparated with a pop.
A moment later, Draco reappeared on a small front path outside of a modest-sized house. Luckily none of the neighbors happened to be looking out their windows, otherwise there would be several startled muggles watching the oddly dressed you man who had just appeared out of thin air. Draco rang the doorbell and then stood staring at the front door of the Granger household. It didn't matter to him that his only visit here hadn't gone over too well with Hermione's father; all he wanted was to feel closer to Hermione. What better place to feel close to her than her own horse with her parents.
Draco was drawn out of his thoughts by the sound of the door being unlocked. Draco sucked in a breath as the door opened to reveal Mrs. Granger.
"Draco!" she exclaimed.
"Mrs. Granger," Draco stuttered, he cleared his throat, "I'm sorry for coming over unannounced, I just…" but Draco couldn't express why he had come, or what he was feeling.
But Mrs. Granger did not need words to understand. She gazed at him with teary eyes, which were full of love before she pulled him into a tight hug. "Don't be silly," she assured, "you are always welcome here."
It took Draco a moment to respond, but soon he found himself hugging her back. Draco let go first and frowned when he saw Mrs. Granger wipe away a few stray tears. "Is there any news about Hermione?" she asked.
The hope in the woman's voice killed Draco. He couldn't even look her in the eye as he shook his head, "we're doing all we can, and we're ready to act the second we learn anything." He paused and finally managed to look Mrs. Granger in the eye, "we will save her Mrs. Granger, I promise I will bring her home."
"She is blessed to have such brave and caring friends," said Mrs. Granger.
Draco smiled a half-smile, "she would do the same for any one of us, we're all lucky to have her in our lives."
Mrs. Granger smiled. "Well," she broke the silence after a moment, "please come in, I'll make you some tea."
"That's very kind, but you don't have to, I don't even know why I came here."
"Nonsense, you look like you need it."
Draco didn't argue further as he was led to a seat at the table and watched Mrs. Granger bustle around the kitchen. In minutes she had a piping hot teapot along with 2 mugs filled to the brim with steaming tea sitting in front of them on the table.
Draco breathed in the calming herbal scent before taking a sip. He glanced up to find Mrs. Granger gazing at him with an expression that could only be described as motherly affection. It wasn't an expression he was accustomed to, but it still made him feel better. It was an expression of love and comfort, and Draco liked it.
"Anytime Hermione was stressed or upset, I would always make her tea," commented Mrs. Granger.
"It helps," agreed Draco as he took another sip. They sat for several moments in silence before Draco confessed a fear which had been plaguing him for days. "I feel like this is my fault, like I could have done something different that would have kept Hermione safe."
Mrs. Granger shook her head," no one could have seen this coming, you've always been there for Hermione, and you're doing all you can now."
Draco nodded, but the doubt was plain on his face.
"She wanted to tell you about the Order you know."
Draco's head shot up.
"After you two had a fight she was distraught, she was angry with Harry and Ron and with the rest of the Order as well for making her keep it from you."
"I never knew, muttered Draco.
It seemed like Mrs. Granger was going to say something more, but she stopped herself when she heard the door open. "Hi honey," she called, "we're in the kitchen!"
"We? Do you have company?" Mr. Granger stepped into the kitchen doorway and was genuinely surprised to see his daughter's boyfriend sitting at the kitchen table with his wife. "Is this about Hermione?" Mrs. Granger asked urgently.
"No sir" Draco shook his head, "I just…I miss her, and I didn't know where else to go."
Mr. Granger's face softened and he nodded at Draco, "Well, I'm glad you came here."
Draco stared at Mr. Granger with a surprised expression, as if he did not believe his ears. "Thank you," he said after a moment.
"You're a good kid Draco, I'm happy Hermione found you."
Draco was shocked, the last time he'd seen Mr. Granger the man had clearly not approved of Draco dating Hermione, so his behavior now was nothing short of bizarre.
Draco spent the rest of the evening with the Grangers; he even enjoyed dinner with them. No one spoke much, but the atmosphere remained comfortable. It was not the stuffy silence Draco had grown up with; it was amiable. Draco actually felt at ease and at home with these muggles, a feat he never would have thought possible before.
After dinner, as Mrs. Granger was rinsing the dishes, she said to Draco, "you're welcome to stay the night if you like.
Draco almost said yes, he wanted to, but instead he shook his head. "Thank you, another time I would love to, but before I left I promised Dumbledore that I would come back to the headquarters."
"Alright, just know, it's an open invitation."
"Thank you, I will take you up on it another time."
Come back soon Draco, it was good to see you again."
"I will, and next time, I'll bring Hermione."
Mrs. Granger smiled; her eyes were shining with the beginnings of tears. She strode forward, enveloped Draco in a tight hug, and gave Draco a kiss on the cheek."
"We will see you again soon I hope," said Mr. Granger.
"I'll make sure of it," Draco held out his hand to Mr. Granger. Mr. Granger took it and pulled Draco forward, giving him a hug as well. Draco, whose father had never been much of a hugging kind of guy, didn't know what to do. He gave Mr. Granger an awkward hug back, but it ended quickly.
"Goodbye, and thank you. I think I really needed this."
"Goodbye," said the two Grangers.
Draco closed his eyes and dissaparated from the Granger's kitchen. When he apparated in his destination, he kept his eyes closed for a minute as if to cement his evening with Hermione's parents permanently in his mind. When he opened his eyes, he saw a dark and desolate road ahead of him. He had purposely apparated a fair distance away from number 12 Grimmauld Place to give himself some alone time before facing the Order again. If he was lucky, Dumbledore will have smoothed things over so that he wouldn't have to talk to anyone just yet.
As he walked, he gripped the box containing Hermione's ring tight in his hand. It had been in the back of his mind the entire time he was at Hermione's parent's house; they had made him feel so welcome and so at home. Originally, he had thought this ring would symbolize that she was his forever. But now he felt that her wearing it would mean something even more, it would also mean that he was hers. And to his surprise, he really liked that idea, he wanted to be a part of her family.
Before he knew it, Draco was standing before the front door to number 12 Grimmauld Place. It was with a heavy sigh that he pushed the door open and strode inside. His face was cold and impassive, no sign of the emotions within was allowed to show through for the Order to see; his pride was too great for that. Draco followed the dull sound of voices to the kitchen where he found some of the Order, including Harry and Ron congregating over what looked like desert. The talking stopped the moment he opened the kitchen door.
After an elongated pause, Mrs. Weasley spoke up, "Draco, would you care for some dinner?"
"I'm fine," Draco responded coolly.
"Come now, you really must eat something," Mrs. Weasley insisted.
Draco could feel his usual sneer forming on his face in response to Mrs. Weasley's mothering. How dare she talk to him like that when she didn't care one bit about him. "I already had dinner, I'm fine."
"Oh? Where did you go?" asked Mrs. Weasley.
Draco scanned the room to find that everyone was sending him accusing glares. He knew what they were thinking; they had all been warned to avoid public places in order to avoid risk of another kidnapping or attack. Clearly they all assumed that Draco had gone back on his word and gone out. Draco rolled his eyes, "if you must know, I was with Hermione's parents."
The shocked looks, which followed his pronouncement, were enough to cheer Draco up, so with a smug grin he excused himself and retreated to the upper level where his room was located. Along the way, he couldn't help but stop in Hermione's room. He did not go in completely; rather he just stood in the doorward looking.
"She'll be alright Draco, we will save her," Kingsley's low voice broke the silence.
"I know," Draco answered without looking away from Hermione's room, "but that doesn't erase the fear, or the pain from missing her."
It was the most honest and vulnerable thing Draco had said since he'd arrived, and it gave Kingsley a greater feeling of respect for the young man. "No it doesn't," was all he said in response to Draco's words.
Draco remained standing for another few minutes after Kingsley left before he forced himself to go to bed. But before he left, he whispered in a voice so quiet that he himself could hardly hear, "goodnight Hermione, I love you."
I hope you all enjoyed chapter 13! Chapter 14 is almost completely finished, but it will not be the last chapter as I thought it would be, but we're getting close. Reviews are greatly appreciated:)