Pain for your love

Chapter two:

I kissed the sleeping Belinda on the forehead and walked out of her bedroom. I walked into my bedroom and slid into bed next to my also sleeping wife. I wrapped my arms around her waist as I thought about how close we had become in just a year. I remembered how she helped me see life in a different way.

It was after the opening feast that I started confiding in her. I was sitting on the couch in the Head's common room staring at the fire, thinking. My life had turned to crap. I had no friends; all of the Slytherin's hated me. I had no family to love me, and I had no family to love. Yes, I was drowning myself in self-pity… at least that was until I found some one that would listen.

"Hey" said Hermione, casually walking in and throwing herself on another couch on our first night.

"Hey" I muttered back not looking away from the fire.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, just thinking about-" I hesitated a second trying to think if I should tell her or not. " Umm, don't worry about it."

"Malfoy, you do know if you ever need to talk to someone, you can talk to me?"

"Yeah, thanks."

I watched her as she got comfortable in her couch and opened her novel. I stared at her for what seemed like hours just watching her turn every page and read them quickly yet calmly. 'How did she do it? How could she be so calm? Is her life so perfect? How come her life is so perfect and mine can't be? What did I do wrong?' were the questions that kept running through my head.

Noticing I was staring, she closed her book and looked up at me questioningly.

"That's it, Malfoy. You've stared at me long enough. Now spill. What's on your mind?"

We stared at each other until my mouth decided to get a mind of it's own.

" Do you know what really gets to me? What is really bugging me?" I asked not daring to break the eye contact.

"What is it?"

"Your life is so perfect. You've got no troubles and yet I can't be happy. How can you be so calm and relaxed as if you have nothing going on in your life?" It didn't make too much sense but I think she understood what I was saying.

" What's so bad in your life?"

"Argh! Everything!" I yelled in frustration, as I stood up and started to pace the room. "I'm hiding from Death Eaters; everybody hates me. Don't forget I'm being accused of something I never did, I'm being accused for being exactly like my father when I'm not. I have a murderer for a father and an alcoholic for a mother!"

" Malfoy-"

"In other words," I cut her off, "I have no life but still I am able to walk and breathe. It's like my life has ended, but my body lives on!" I pulled put my wand and held it to my heart.

This wasn't the first time I had tried to kill my self, but it sure was the last. I had tried it a number of times but never really had the courage to do it.

As I was about to whisper the incarnation, Hermione ran up to me and snatched the wand from my hand. She looked as if she were about to cry. Once again I looked at her and she shook her head.

" How can you think I have no troubles in my life? Do you think watching my dad commit suicide is nothing?" she stuttered as the tears came streaming down her face. "Malfoy, you can't just give up on life. Life is like a challenge. Giving up life is like giving up the challenge and I know you're not one to give up a challenge." She was silent for a second and then she continued, "Life is like a quiditch match. If you saw your opposing seeker closer to the snitch, are you going to try and catch up or fly down to the ground and give up?"

She wiped her eyes and started walking to her bedroom.

"Granger." She turned and faced me. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry about your father and I'm sorry for scaring you." She smiled at me sadly and continued walking to her room.

Ever since then, I had trusted Hermione and told her how I was feeling at different times. She has helped me realise that life is a challenge and it's not all going to be easy, I have to overcome the bad times but also enjoy the good. I have to suffer the storm to reach the rainbow. Still, I couldn't believe I had brought up her father's death (even though I never knew). I felt so bad and I still apologise to her about it now.