Disclaimer: Please don't sue. I don't own POTO... All I own is an overactive imagination.

Summary: ErikRaoul slash (finally). Story continuation of A Mask for All Occasions. One big karmic comeback.

Warning(s): Blood!

Pairing(s): ErikRaoul

Story note: Well, Raoul's had a psychological breakdown. Poor Raoul's gone, who knows if it's permanent, but he's pretty much gone in this chapter, right? In his place is that new and improved Vicomte… improved? Who knows?

-Erik's karma gets even in this chapter. I think he's OOC because I don't really see him as being hesitant and he acts like a wuss in some parts of this. Call it a low point of his life. --

o.o.o.o

Unmasking the Chains

Chapter 20

o.o.o.o

By: Lucifer Rosemaunt

o.o.o.o

Erik's POV

o.o.o

Last time:

There were only chains, chains that I now saw. They were chains that I could not fully understand and was only now beginning to pull against.

There was no one left.

No one but Raoul. No one mattered but him.

Everything of my old life could be disposed. I would dispose the unnecessary weight. All I had to do was let go. Let go of my past conceptions and past prejudices. All I had to do to move forward was leave the past behind.

I let go.

I let the past die as I left the cemetery and headed toward the future.

o.o.o

That optimistic feeling that had kept my energy high and the pain to a minimum subsided somewhere around the time I realized I had about two more hours of walking before I reached the Opera Populaire. I had been walking for what felt like an eternity and now that the sun was out, it was harder to make progress. I had to worry about people noticing my presence and the fact that I did not have my cloak made it harder. I wondered why the sun had decided to shine so brightly when this morning had been so dismal. That was an evil trick to play on me since I had to walk home.

However, I could not bring myself to be completely angry at the day. It had been enlightening to say the least and now that I was set on what I wanted, I could somehow believe that everything would turn out well. I had no idea what drove that optimism since nothing had actually ever gone as I had planned it, but I was confident that this was meant to be. Things that were meant to be had to come to pass. I reminded myself that fact whenever I had to once again rest for the sake of my throbbing wound.

The cemetery was not very close to the city proper; in fact, it was surrounded by happy little homes with oblivious families, farmland, and some scattered forest. In order to remain anonymous, I had to completely avoid those neighborhoods. It took that much more time and that much more distance to walk to keep my identity secret. It was hard when I did not have enough energy to tread lightly or breathe softly. I simply knew I had to keep walking and breathing. Intermittently, I would have spurts of wooziness from the loss of blood, but somehow I managed to take one more step forward and then another.

Once I was able to get into familiar territory, it was not so bad. There was that extra burst of energy that came with knowing that I was getting so close to a bed, bandages, and food. No matter how bright the sun was, the back streets of Paris were always dark. More importantly, they were filled with people who knew to turn their heads from suspicious people. They were people who knew how to stay alive and were intelligent enough to know a dangerous person when they saw one… unlike those imbeciles at the opera house. That was the fatigue and pain talking though. It relieved some of the tension of my body to make snide comments at others. The people at the opera house were easy targets. Perhaps it was a psychological thing. All I knew was that it made me forget about the pain for a moment.

Thoughts of Raoul were another source of comfort for me. It took little effort to conjure up an image of him. My wound still hurt. It still bled, but it was easily pushed down the list of my priorities when I was able to think about Raoul. There was little respite in it though. I would begin to worry about what had happened to him after a while. The what if's plagued my mind. It was no use thinking such thoughts, but I could not help it. The most glaringly obvious fact about Raoul was that he was currently not with me. I could not ignore it.

I pushed every thought back as I checked my progress. I paused to rest a bit, as I watched unnoticed as carriages and people passed me. There was an anonymity to it all that was almost comforting. I did not stand out as I usually did. However, that was only because I was hiding. I picked the shirt off my body. My perspiration had soaked my shirt and it clung to me uncomfortably. I winced when I saw the front stained almost completely with blood. Just a little further. The opera house was just a little further. It became a mantra in my mind. Once there I could recuperate in peace and then hopefully Raoul would come and visit.

I did not reach the opera house until a little after noon. I slipped into the familiar passageways and the cool air caressed my skin. I breathed a sigh of relief and rested again the wall letting my eyes adjust to the darkness. I pushed myself forward needing to reach my home. It felt further than it really was. By the time I dropped onto my bed, I was thoroughly exhausted and I could no longer ignore the pain. My eyes were drooping and the desire to sleep was overwhelming. However, I needed to tend to my wound. I needed to make certain that I did not bleed to death while I was sleeping. I had a reason to live. I would not want stupidity to be the cause of my death.

I slowly rolled to a sitting position and grabbed the bandages that had been nearby. Thankfully, I had gotten a lot of bandages for Raoul when he had been here. There was enough for me to clean the wound. To my chagrin, the gash was indeed deep. I stood up and searched for a needle and some thread before beginning the painful process of sewing myself back together. I was no stranger to doing this unfortunately and I completed the process fairly quickly after much hissing and gulps of alcohol.

I wrapped up the wound and dragged myself into a comfortable position on the bed. I had not been sleeping this past week. It was Raoul's fault. I had not wanted for one moment to lose sight of him. I had wanted to spend as much time staring at him as I could, and I had. I had hardly slept, but it had been well worth it. However, it would also explain why I felt so weak now. The moment I laid my head down, I was fast asleep.

0.0.0

I looked in front of me and stared at the stone. It was the horse statue on the roof of my opera house. I leaned to the side to look beyond it and saw Raoul and Christine. What were they doing here? Why were they trying to escape from me? Did they not know that I was the owner of all who entered this building? I had just killed Buquet as a sign of my displeasure at their actions and here Raoul and Christine were holding hands on my rooftop.

Christine was acting agitated and murmuring what Raoul had to think was utter nonsense. He looked uncertain, but gently taking her hands into his, he walked her over to the light and began to sing to her. "No more talk of darkness. Forget these wide-eyed fears. I'm here …"

I'm here. I stepped out from behind the statue, but they took no notice of me. I could not move further out though. I knew somewhere in my mind that I should not because I did not want to be found. I opened my mouth to call to them instead. Once again, my mouth was not cooperating with me. I could not speak. I was stuck there, just watching them. Listening to his song…

However, I did not need to hear the words. I knew them by heart already. A song about love and devotion, and I knew it already. I knew every note as though I myself had written it solely to hear Raoul sing it. He had a remarkable voice. It seemed to resonate through me. That too was wrong. I was supposed to be angry with him. I was supposed to be angry with both of them.

Both?

My eyes had unfocused when I had been lost in my thoughts. I looked over towards where Raoul and Christine were, but all I could see was Raoul's back. I could not see Christine at all.

Raoul began to walk away. My body finally listened to me when I told it to move. I followed. I finally caught sight of Christine over Raoul's shoulder. I was certain that he was still singing. It seemed to echo in the background, but it was muffled. She was looking at me, more like past me, and it was like looking at someone I did not know. However, I did know her. It was as though up until that moment, I had been seeing my concept of her. I did not want Christine. That was no mystery to me. It was no sudden revelation. She had done so much to lose my affection or what I believed to be affection for her. It had been easier when I had never really seen her. Then she was suddenly gone, and I was left looking at Raoul's back.

I reached out but he seemed to pull away from me without really moving. It felt as though I were being dragged away from him. He turned around and I finally stopped moving away. It was just him and me when he finally looked me in the eye. I took a step backwards in shock and suddenly I was falling backward.

I flailed my arms and reached towards where I knew Raoul to be. I was falling

I screamed loudly and jerked into a sitting position. The moment I did, my abdomen protested and I dropped back onto the bed. My heart was beating loudly in my ears. My stomach had felt as though it were stuck in my throat. I was gasping for air and every time I breathed, my wound hurt more. I rolled onto my side and closed my eyes. I curled up grabbing my stomach. I did my best to steady my breathing. I tentatively probed my stitches hoping that I had not pulled them out when I had jerked awake. Luckily, I had not.

I had forgotten about that dream. It was unexpected to say the least. This dream had kept me awake for so long. It had caused me weeks of exhaustion when I could barely sleep for minutes at a time. My hands were still shaking. My heart still beat unsteadily. My lungs were beginning to hurt from the strain of trying to slow my breathing when all it wanted to do was take deep gulps of air. My stomach felt uneasy; it felt worse than uneasy and I feared that I would have to get out of bed in case anything did happen. I had forgotten about the dream, but I did not forget how this felt, the panic and fear.

Even now, I could not remember what had driven me to take that step back. What could have Raoul done to shock me? Perhaps I was asking the wrong question though. What had happened to Raoul? I did not want to let my mind wander through that possibility when I was here and he was stuck with his brother. The only thing that I clearly remembered was Christine as she looked through me. I could also remember his song, but I did not need the dream to remember it.

I rolled onto my stomach wincing when I leaned on my wound. I wanted to bury my face in my pillow though. I had slowed my breathing but the way my heart beat erratically made me worry. I sighed loudly. I would be having no sleep again for a while. What had made the dreams stop before?

Raoul.

I let out a string of curses still mad at myself for my acts of cowardice in sending Raoul away so many times. It hurt to yell though so I was forced to stop. Frustrated and restless, I slowly sat up and leaned against the headboard of the bed waiting for my heart to slow down.

I stared into the darkness of my home. Home. This opera house was my home, was it not? The organ, Box 5, the lake, the stage, the rooms, they were all mine. Even the singers and the managers, they had been all mine. Had been. I did not want them any longer and I no longer laid any claim to them. I grinned at the thought that I was not the Opera Ghost. I was Erik and the only thing I laid claim on was Raoul. I did not care about the managers and their junk business, Giry and her ballet, Philippe and his arrogance, Christine and… and her rooftop confessions of love. Maybe I did care about that last one.

That rooftop seemed to be the place where pivotal moments occurred. I had sworn vengeance on the two when they both had proclaimed their love for one another. I had also experienced clarity on that rooftop. I knew that I would have to return eventually.

I felt as though I had once again achieved that clarity, but it was partly troubling. I had discarded my roles and decided to take Raoul. It was what I had wanted all along, wasn't it? I wanted to be myself. I wanted to be Erik. I had also wanted someone who would see me as I was and not some monster. I believed Raoul to be that person. But… and this was the troubling part, what if something destroyed it all before I could get it?

It was the dream's fault. I did not like it. I disliked it even more the second time around. I disliked it not only because it prevented me from sleeping or because my wound hurt more now than ever before or because my heart had still not slowed down or my hands stopped shaking. I hated it now for a new reason. This dream had been about Raoul. It had been about Raoul and it made me feel like this. Nothing about him had ever made me feel this way. I could not help but feel apprehensive. Was this a warning? Had that foreboding this morning yet to come to pass?

What if it were just building to a crescendo that would ruin me completely?

I sighed and tried to ignore those doubts and that nagging fear. I would not be dissuaded by anything. If fate had decided to play with my life once more, I would have to fight back. Things could not be too bad. It had not been the best of mornings, but I knew that it could get so much worse.

I slid over and stood up. Dressing myself in cleaner clothes and a cloak, I quickly grabbed a piece of bread that would serve as my lunch before heading upstairs. Though I had not seen any carriage or horse in the front, maybe Raoul had come here already. Walking the familiar paths, it was strange when every thing was so quiet. It seemed that everyone had taken the day off. I knew that the managers still had not decided whether to do the opera. I knew that they would of course eventually do it. They would for the sake of protecting their investment. I also knew Carlotta would make a fuss about her part since I had specifically made certain it was small. I grinned at the thought. It still caused me some satisfaction to cause disarray in their lives.

I passed by the main hall and saw no one there. Moving to the auditorium, I found that it too was empty. I figured the best bet was the dormitories. Christine's room, I found to be empty, which was not surprising. She would not want to be alone now that I had actually hurt her. I heard more than bothered to look at Carlotta yelling to who had to be Piangi and her entourage about the atrocity of my opera. When I finally checked the ballet dancer's room, I found Christine and Meg huddled together talking and laughing.

She looked so at ease, so young. I wondered how she could still pretend so much. I wondered how she did not lose herself to her roles. It no longer mattered. I knew that I once would have loved to see these people and their actions. There was the normalcy that I had so greatly desired. I had been envious of them and to ruin their lives, I would wreak havoc. I would find little things to scare and unnerve them. It had been one of my greater joys. Now I looked at them uninterestedly. I did not care what they did with their lives. I did not care as long as they did not affect mine. In fact, I no longer cared about my opera anymore.

I should care, and a part of me was still obsessed with it. However, Don Juan Triumphant was only filled with thoughts of her. I had created that masterpiece because of an unhealthy obsession that in the end only caused harm to myself. It was perhaps not how I wanted to continue to live my life. Don Juan Triumphant was not only the Opera Ghost's work though, if I thought about it. The culmination of the opera was Erik's. It had been inspired by Raoul and I would so dearly like to see it performed. I could see it in my mind and see Raoul's reaction to it. I was grinning but I could not seem to help myself.

What was I going to do about Don Juan Triumphant? The final answer would be… Nothing. I hoped to be already gone with Raoul in tow before they even premiered it. Hopefully, wherever we ended up would be a place with an organ so that I could perform my opera for him. I of course would be Don Juan. Maybe I could even convince Raoul to sing the young maiden's part. I almost laughed aloud at the visual image I had.

Yes, I did not need to be here to see the opera performed. I could take Raoul before they even began rehearsals. That was of course assuming Raoul ever came back to the opera house. I was still worried about him. Philippe was dangerous, but what could I do?

I found myself standing by an exit of the opera house. I could go to the Chagny estate. I lifted my foot to take that first step but found that I could not. I knew something held me to the opera house. I understood that fact. Understanding it and acting against it were completely different things though. It was a completely different issue of whether or not I could break those chains so quickly. I would wait for Raoul to come to me and then I knew with him by my side, I would be able to leave this cursed place.

It was not as if I had never left the opera house. I had left it just this morning. There was something different about this step though. I felt frozen. It was frustrating and I wanted to yell and shout and literally throw myself out. I knew why I could not leave just yet. The other times I had left the opera house, I had left knowing that I was going to come back. I would return. Leaving now, I knew that once I retrieved Raoul, I would never return to this place ever again. That was what made me pause. That was what had stopped me from leaving.

This was my domain. It had been the only place I had known for a long time now. I knew the familiar pathways and the comforting sound of water lapping on the shore. It was that comfort, that complacency that had made me weak.

I could leave it all. I knew I could, but a part of me did not want to rush the inevitable. I knew that life in the opera house was easier than that of the outside world. When I kidnapped Raoul, it would force me to be ready to face it all, but until then, I found solace knowing that I could always return here. I found solace in knowing where my place in the Opera Populaire was. I was certain that my place in the world would be naught but a monster. I could fight against it all I wanted, but I felt as though I would eventually lose to all the assessments of others and become that monster once more. It would be much too easy to fall back into a role. That was why I felt as though I needed Raoul.

Did I need him? I knew I wanted him, but to actually need him meant that I was admitting that weakness. I was actually trusting someone. Could I do that? I did already, didn't I? I trusted Raoul. I had believed him when he had promised to break up with Christine. I thought I had stopped trusting and depending on others a long time ago. When had this change occurred? And, did I want to stop it? If I gave Raoul too much power before I found if his affection for me was similar, he could break me. The only reason Christine had not done so even though she had betrayed me was because I had always known on some level that she would. Raoul was different though. I did not think he could deceive me. I did not think that he would want to betray me.

I was drawn out of my thoughts when I heard a carriage pull up to the opera house. I was momentarily confused when I saw two blondes both with short hair riding in it. I frowned when I saw the Comte get out of the carriage. I had known that one of them had been the Comte. I did not know what I was feeling when Raoul turned his head and descended from the carriage as well. He cut his hair. I knew I was pouting but I could not help it. I had rather liked his long hair.

I forced myself to focus. This was my chance. He looked well enough – if I ignored the short hair aspect of him. I saw no stiffness in his movements that would make me believe that he had been further injured when they had left me at the cemetery. He even looked… the word was not 'better', but he looked untroubled. That air of sadness that had seemed to linger in his presence was gone. He had always looked to be pained in a way even when he had been with me. I had seen it with his smiles, which were filled with more sadness than joy. It appeared to be gone, but I was too far to really be certain.

Something had to have happened to him. Whatever it was, I knew that Raoul would bewith me… whether he wanted to or not. I would worry about the details later.

They entered the main hall and headed towards the managers' office. Watching closely, I followed them. The Comte turned to Raoul who looked at him guilelessly, "I will meet with the managers first. Get your business done and meet me back in the main hall."

He began walking away and I wondered what business Raoul needed to do if the Comte was going to meet with the managers. I hoped he was not going to visit Christine. I dearly hoped he had learned his lesson about her. It had been my mistake to tell him to watch her, but I had learned my lesson from that mistake. I wanted him nowhere near her ever again. Who knew what she would do now that she was with the Comte. I could not be too mad with him though if he did visit her. He was probably worried about her. He was always worried about her, I thought more bitterly than I would have liked. It was just frustrating.

The Comte stopped suddenly and turned back to Raoul, "You still have much to learn before you can even attempt it."

Attempt it? What was Raoul going to attempt to do? I looked at Raoul who appeared to be stunned. He knew what his brother was referring to however. I scowled when it was once again brought to my attention that his brother knew more about him than I did. The Comte had been gloating but I did not think that he had been exaggerating about this fact. He said he was going to change Raoul, and I was beginning to worry that he had succeeded. He had this smug expression in his face and he was being rather flippant with Raoul. I had only seen them interact once before, and there had been a suppressed rage about the Comte's actions when he dealt with Raoul. If the Comte's actions now meant anything, he was well pleased with himself.

The Comte briskly turned and strode away confidently.

Raoul suddenly had a look of determination. Looking down at something in his arms, he started to walk in the opposite direction. I watched Raoul and could not decide whether if he had really changed or if he was simply acting a different role. This person with the furrowed brows and a dissatisfied expression did not seem to be Raoul, but it did not seem to be the Vicomte either.

I was staring at him so intently that I did not realize where he was heading until he entered Box 5. I momentarily allowed myself to feel a little victorious. Raoul was going to visit me. However, why would the Comte know about it? More importantly, why would he let him go by himself? Unless, he was certain that Raoul would not do anything of which he would not approve.

He exited the box before I could even reveal myself and headed back towards the main hall.

I quickly scanned the area. No one else was around for which I was grateful. I stepped out into the middle of the hallway where I could be easily seen. This was it. "Raoul," I called.

"Who?" He turned around angrily. I did not know what to make of his reaction. He looked at me with an expression I could not properly read. However when he spoke, he called me by name, "Erik."

I grinned but hid the expression. Hearing him call me by name was still a novelty to me. It was nice to hear it aloud.

He seemed to be uncomfortable though. My name had not fallen from his lips as it had when I had first told him. It seemed awkward and foreign. He took it back, "Monsieur OG."

I blatantly frowned at his response. Something was different with him. I mentally cursed the Comte. Anything that had changed with him would of course be the Comte's fault. It had to be.

I hoped that Raoul was only joking with me. I hoped that his stern expression would fade and he would at least attempt to give me a smile. He had always tried when in my presence. I had not appreciated it as much as I should have, but I wished he would just give me that sad smile once more. It would put me at ease.

He had always let his guard down so that I could read his eyes. Now, there was nothing in his eyes. There was nothing in his expression that I could properly read or understand. How could he have changed so much in half a day?

I stepped closer and he took a step back in response. He shied away from me. I felt my frown deepen. I caught his eyes and tried to see some semblance of the Raoul I knew in him. Still, there was nothing. He was not even acting the part of the Vicomte because I had always been able to see Raoul in him. He had not been able to hide his true self from me since I knew where to look. This time, there was nothing underneath this person. There was nothing underneath that gaze. I felt my heart skip a beat.

He narrowed his eyes at my gaze. I could read this expression easily. He was getting irritated.

I stopped staring at him so intensely. I could not help but search his eyes. How could there be nothing else there? I could not help but call out to him, "Raoul?"

His irritation only seemed to increase, "Please, Monsieur, do not call me as such."

Monsieur? He called me Monsieur, but it was not so much the formality but the way he had said it. He had not spoken to me with such arrogance before. I always associated arrogance with the Vicomte. Whenever Raoul spoke to me, it was light with some wit and some uncertainty. He spoke to me as though I were an equal. Never like this.

I could not bring myself to really accept it, but what else could I conclude? If this was not Raoul, then it had to be the Vicomte though my mind knew that it was neither.

I just could not allow myself to admit that the Comte had managed to do something to change Raoul so drastically. There was that unfounded optimism in me. If this was the Vicomte though, I would have to be wary.

My expression hardened and I took a step backwards. The Vicomte did not have a problem with fighting with me, and I would need the space to react if he did. "Vicomte."

He nodded his head and finally offered me a smile. It was definitely not what I had been expecting. It was disturbing. There was absolutely no happiness in it. There was no sadness either though. His smile reminded me of one of the stone angels in the cemetery. It was cold and seemed to be mocking me. Then I realized whose smile it really reminded me of, it was the Comte's.

This whole situation was unnerving. First, there was the haircut: although Raoul's hair had been cut differently, I could not forget Raoul's adamant protest against cutting his hair when he had spoken to Christine. I could not forget it because I had agreed with him to keep it long. Then, there was that emptiness in his eyes as though there was nothing beneath the surface. It was almost as if this were no mask. Now, there was the smile: the Comte had smiled similarly as he had tried to kill me in the cemetery. My stomach tightened at the thought of Raoul being anything like the Comte and I forced myself not to wince when my wound ached. I knew that smile was one that could be filled with malice and arrogance but nothing more.

I was angry with myself. I found myself wondering what had happened to him. Could this be any more reminiscent of the masquerade? Only this time, it was I with the stomach wound and bloody shirt. Still… still, it was Raoul that had something amiss. I could not let him out of my sight for a moment!

He spoke with that same arrogance, "I would very much appreciate it if you continue to address me properly."

Address him properly? After a while, I had only ever thought of him as Raoul, Vicomte role or not. However, I did not know how to act around him now and it only succeeded in making me more frustrated. I took a semi-calming breath and considered my options. I did not care who stood in front of me because no matter what role was currently out, Raoul had to be somewhere inside there. It would be harder with this new Vicomte, but that would not hinder me. I would kidnap him and then make him remember who he really was.

He held out a cloak to me. "I wanted to return this to you," he said.

So, he had only come to visit me because he wanted to return my cloak. The look in his eyes said that was the only business he had with me. Typical… I was disappointed at the realization. Our meetings were only ever about business. I guessed that when I saw him looking for me, I had been hoping he had searched for the sake of seeing me. I wondered when I started to delude myself. At least with Christine, she had played along with my delusions. She had gladly spurred on my delusions, but with Raoul, his innocence just destroyed each illusion painfully every time.

I looked at the cloak in disdain. Looking at him, he looked at me expectantly before glancing down at the cloak. I really could not understand what was happening. This was supposed to be my chance. I should just kidnap him, but I was still too thrown off by it all.

I could not help but ask, "What happened?"

Raoul frowned at my question. He looked annoyed once more. Apparently, I had not been the only person to ask him that question.

I almost moved towards him, but I knew that he would only step back. I would have to bring him closer by some other means. I would need to lower his guard first.

"You cut your hair," I said with distaste. Raoul once again frowned at hearing this statement.

Faster than he had time to react, I grabbed his arm and pulled him close to me. I tugged so harshly that he almost ran into me. I hardly would have minded, but he caught himself. He struggled rather in vain. Once he stopped struggling, I released his arm. This was good. I could feel his body heat. I could feel him breathing. It was nice to know that he was alive and well, maybe not 'well'. I could not help but make a comparison. Raoul would not have struggled against me. There had been that one time when I threw him out of my home, but he had been mad at me then. In the cemetery, Raoul had let me hold him without once protesting. I would have liked to think that he wanted me to hold him.

I was content with closing the distance, but it still felt as though we were miles apart. He had to look up to meet my eyes, and I was annoyed that I could not understand who stared back. Where was Raoul?

He glared at me but he did not back away. Everything about his posture said that he was not standing so close because he wanted to but because he was challenging me.

This close, I could not help but notice how handsome he did look. I had liked his hair very much, but short hair did make him look rather striking. I could not help but stare, and I wanted to reach out and touch him. He was so close. I wanted to hold him. At least with his hair short, I did not have to worry about his hair blocking his face. However, I remembered that time when Christine had told him to cut his hair. What if he had done this for her? "You cut your hair," I repeated.

He shrugged, "If I did?"

I wanted to ask him why, maybe yell at him to tell me what happened when he had gone home. I knew that was not the best way to go about it though. I would have to be careful since I did not know exactly how he would react now.

My fingers twitched. I really wanted to run my fingers through his hair. I knew what it felt like when it had been long. I could summon the image and the sensation of it. I wondered if it would still feel the same. I doubted it. Maybe… I reached out and ran my fingers through his hair.

He jerked away from me with an angry cry, "Monsieur!"

He was frowning at me, but I could not seem to care. I inwardly sighed. I had been right. It felt differently. Not bad, but I rather liked the feeling of running my fingers through it when his hair had been long. My hand was still suspended in air. I wanted to reach out to him and make him stop being so confusing.

I wanted him to not have changed so quickly. Admittedly, I had changed to. I knew, but his change was extreme. There was nothing left of Raoul in his actions. Nothing.

My mind rebelled at the thought again. There was no other explanation though. No, the Comte could not have succeeded. He could not have. I would not let that be the reality of the situation. Whatever he did, I could undo. I had to be able to undo it. Raoul and I… what could I say? We had shared a connection. We had something between us. It could not be my imagination that he had dropped his pretenses with me. It could not have been just another role he had been playing. No. I would not accept it.

I dropped my arm. I called out to him, hoping to see a glimpse of something, a flash, anything. "Raoul."

He looked at me suspiciously. He did not respond. I did nothing think that he knew what to say. It was not as though I had asked a question. I had simply called his name. If anything, from his previous reactions, he would tell me to stop calling him by his given name. Vicomte? I scoffed at the thought. I would not call him the Vicomte. I would not accept that he was anything but Raoul with me.

I called out again and I hated the fact that it sounded as though I were begging. I did not beg. I amended that thought. Maybe I would for Raoul, but I hated myself for begging anyway. How low had I stooped? How desperate was I?

That was an easy question to answer. I was really desperate to have Raoul with me. I had decided to change my whole life only because I had been certain that I would have someone with me. I would not have to be alone anymore. I would not have to live, in solitude, in darkness, in shame. I would be able to look someone in the eyes and not wonder if all they saw was a mask. I was absolutely sure that person was Raoul. I knew I loved him.

Then there was that doubt that had inevitably settled in my mind and perhaps my heart. What if he did not love me? What if he could not?

I was desperate. Desperate enough to kill, to move heaven and earth, and definitely desperate enough to beg.

He responded this time. "Monsieur, I told you to desist calling me so familiarly."

At least I had expected that. It did not lessen its sting though. He was still unreadable. He was still someone else but Raoul.

There was the conclusion I did not want to even consider. What if Raoul had only ever acted with me? What if this was who the real Raoul was underneath under all the roles I had seen him play? It would mean that the Vicomte, the fiancé of Christine, the patron, and Raoul were only roles, and I was now for the first time meeting the real man beneath all those masks. It would explain everything. It would explain why he was really not hiding anything from me. If anything, he was being the most forthright he had ever been with me.

I could have sworn though. I could not help but grasp at the strings as they unraveled.

I stood there wanting to shake this out of him. "What happened? Did Philippe do this?"

He looked at me in pure confusion. From there, he became appalled that I had asked him about his business. I wanted to scream in frustration. This person may not be the Vicomte that had first come to the opera house, but it was without a doubt a mixture of him and something I was reluctant to acknowledge that was the Comte.

No. This could not be happening. Maybe I was still dreaming. As though in response to that thought, my side began to hurt. I was becoming angry with this infernal state of confusion.

He replied, "The only thing to have happened was your grabbing me."

What was I supposed to do though? Had it been just Raoul who faced me, I would have simply taken him. I doubted he would have protested though that could be only my own arrogance. Even if he did protest, he would not have wanted to hurt me. Raoul seemed to dislike confrontation. Had it been the Vicomte who had faced me, I would have subdued him. He would have tried to fight back but even with all of the Vicomte's fervor, he seemed apathetic when left to his own devices. He only acted as he thought he should act. The Vicomte would act as any Vicomte would have, and it would have been easy to read what his actions would have been.

No, I had to have been taken by surprise by Raoul. If I had known that he would be a mixture of the Vicomte and the Comte, then I would have knocked him out while he still thought I had not been around. If he was truly like the Comte, he would not only distrust me, but fight dirty. I was not well enough to expect the unexpected in a fight.

There had to be another way. I was not going to give up. I had said so before, and when I made my mind up about something, it was permanently fixed. I would have Raoul.

Then it hit me. He had been affected by my voice in the cemetery. I was not completely certain, but it was a gamble I was willing to take. Maybe I could make him come with me without having to use force.

He spoke up a little uncomfortably, "I simply came here to return your cloak."

He looked fidgety. Maybe he knew what I was going to do. I would have to calm him somehow before he did run away.

Some sort of pride kept him in place though; a Vicomte's pride of course. He continued, "To repay my debt to you, I'm offering you this one last chance to prove that you will do no more harm to this opera house or its occupants. If I even sense some indication that you are planning anything or have done anything, I will kill you."

I did not like what I heard. He had once warned me about hurting Christine, but he had never threatened to kill me. The worst part was that I believed that he would do it given the opportunity. He would kill me. Kill me. My mind faltered a bit at his warning. I reached out and grabbed the cloak looking at it just so that I could focus on something other than him. It was as though my mind were stuck in a loop that kept reiterating the fact that he would kill me. Just like the Comte had tried.

He would not. I did not know why I was positive, but he would not.

I looked up at him. I may not recognize who he was currently, but he could not have changed that much. He stood in his place proud that he had yet to run when everything about him: his nervous glances, the way he shifted on his feet, his uncomfortable posture, said to run.

I stepped towards him, hoping that his pride would force him to stay in place. Luckily, it did.

"What do you want?" He said. Though his voice did not waver, his breath had sped up.

I stared at him intently. I needed him to only see me. Although I could not see Raoul in those eyes, I knew that if I tried hard enough I would be able to bring him back. Raoul froze in place. His eyes widened and I could tell he wanted to look away. He could not though. I used everything I had within me to keep him in place. It was a type of hypnosis that I had learned in my time in the carnival.

Usually my voice was enough, but with this, I could hope to reach him so that he would not remember anything but me. I reached out to grab his right arm lightly. I did not want to snap him out of his trance. I was surprised that he was still struggling. I moved even closer to him. Raoul had to look up to keep our gaze, but he was compliant to do so.

I did not want Raoul like this. I never wanted to do this to him because I wanted him to come to me of his own volition. I could make an exception this time though. This was not Raoul. This was the Vicomte and a little persuasion on my part could not hurt. I could still call out to Raoul. I could still hope that he would hear me.

"Come with me," I half sang. I spoke with a deeper tone and almost whispered it to him. My voice was one of the best assets I had. If Raoul had loved Christine's voice, then he would love mine. I was calling out to him. I was calling that deeper part of him, that darkness in everyone that always answered my call. His eyes glazed a bit.

He did not respond, but I had not expected him to. I did not think he even heard what I said. I knew it was hard to listen to the words when I sang. It was not always about the words. It was the feeling behind them. I sang to Raoul with every desire I had of him and that feeling was strong.

"Come with me," I sang again. Raoul momentarily closed his eyes in pleasure and I had to control myself. My breath hitched. The look on his face was so, so… erotic. I took a moment to just look at him. The blood was rushing hotly in my body. It was suddenly really warm. He seemed to revel in the feel of my voice as it washed over him and I wanted to touch him everywhere my voice reached. I wanted to hold him, to kiss him. My heart beat rapidly at the thought and I felt myself drawing closer. His lips were so close. I stopped myself. I could not. I knew I would lose him if I did so. I had to contain myself.

Surprisingly, he was still rebelling against me. He responded, "Where? Why?"

I was impressed by his will. With Christine, it was not surprising that she had been able to ignore my call. It was not because that darkness no longer existed within her. It was because she knew that darkness intimately. She did not need to succumb to it since she could very well manipulate it. Raoul was innocent. Raoul had been innocent. I had doubted if he ever had a single thought about harming another person in his life. He had easily succumbed to my call in the cemetery. Now though, he was struggling.

That constant worry I had felt for him since this morning increased a bit more. What could the Comte have possibly done?

Then, he amazed me further. He somehow managed to break the eye contact we had, but at least, he still could not move. I had to get to him. I had to break through whatever had happened since this morning. I wanted my Raoul back.

"Raoul," I softly crooned.

He immediately looked me in the eyes. "Yes," the response was also immediate.

I did not understand what was keeping him from just giving in. Was he so unaffected by me? His mind seemed to be elsewhere. If he was trying to distract himself, I would have to bring him back to this moment. I gently began to stroke the arm I was holding. I would have liked it to be skin on skin contact, but it would have to do. Right now, touching him was enough. It had to be. My own selfish desires wanted more. If he kept making those faces, who knew what I would do to him?

I had to be smart about this. I suddenly began to believe that if I could take him away from the opera house and from his brother, then he would stop acting like he was. What else could I do but take him away? I was slowly beginning to panic though. Only sheer force of will kept the fear at bay. I had known this would not be easy. Actually, I had thought that taking Raoul away from this would have been extremely easy. He was being abused by his brother. Why wouldn't he want to leave? It was that assumption that had been my mistake though. Apparently, he wanted to stay.

"Let me take you away from all this."

I called to him. I tugged gently on his arm and I let myself believe that Raoul's body was moving out of its own volition. I let myself believe that this was Raoul. It was easier to call out to him. It was easier to ignore the fact that Raoul had just promised to kill me if I did anything like this current act was.

"Come with me."

He nodded.

I could do this. He would be mine. I had to keep telling myself that. It was easier for me to act when I knew the goal. This was a worthwhile goal. I could do this.

"Away from this place…"

I began to walk towards Box 5. It was dangerous to stay in the hallway. Anyone would be able to see us. I could determine my next step when we were better hidden. He followed me.

Watching him however, I could not help but feel a pang of sadness. This had not gone the way I had expected. The blank look on his face was the last thing I really wanted to see. I was so tired of it all. I wanted to start a new life. A new life with Raoul away from all of this.

"… away from Paris…"

Paris was troublesome. The Opera Populaire was troublesome. Christine and Philippe, they were all troublesome. I was tired of roles, tired of having to try so hard just to fail so horribly. All of my previous efforts had been in vain. I had tried to secure my place in the opera house and I had for just a fleeting moment before M. LeFevre sold the opera house to managers who had made my life difficult. I had given Christine her voice hoping that she would understand that I was so much more than just a monster. I had given her time and spent so much effort in cultivating her. I now despised her. There was that part of me that asked how was this any different?

I did not know how this was different. I just knew that Raoul was different than anyone I had ever known. This whole situation was different.

Just follow me, I mentally ordered.

"… away from Philippe…"

When I saw him blink rapidly at the name, I wished I could take it back. He refused to look me in the eyes. He was frowning openly and looked to be having some inner conflict. We had been making progress, too.

"Raoul," I tried to call to him, but the effect was gone.

It was not Raoul. It was the Vicomte de Chagny.

He stepped away from me. I could not help but feel despair. This was not different, was it? This was just like everything else in my life. If I wanted something, I would have to take it.

Raoul looked a little betrayed when he realized what I had been doing. I could almost believe it was Raoul. He pulled his arm away from me, but I quickly closed my fingers around it. He tried to forcefully yank it away from my grasp but only managed to wrench his shoulder painfully. I winced when, he cried out in pain. I almost let go of his arm in fear that I would harm him further. That voice inside me just reminded me that this was not different than anything else in my life. I would have to take it, forcefully if necessary. It was not as though his struggling had not been hurting me as well. I grabbed his arm tightly.

"Raoul." I said firmly as a warning. He could pull all he wanted, but I was not going to release him. What had made me think I could get him to come with me without force? Why had I ever thought he would want to come willingly?

He growled at me angrily, "Vicomte. Do not test me, Monsieur."

Do not test him? I scoffed at the words. He should not test me.

I began to drag him away without another word. He tried to dig his heels into the carpet but he was simply too light. What had he thought? I was stronger than he was. I was more determined than he was. I glanced at him and noticed him frowning. I would have no pity for him right now. I could worry about the wounds later on, but he had appeared to be just fine earlier. He whimpered and I almost lost my resolve. I grabbed his arm tighter and kept moving. I would drag him to my home, bound and gag him before deciding on which route we would take.

His brother would never be able to find him. I would make sure we were very far away before he even discovered that Raoul was missing. They would not know what had happened. Madame Giry might guess, but what proof was there? I had never been anything but a ghost to these people. And, if Raoul insisted on struggling, I would have to knock him out for a duration of the trip. I would somehow find a way to get him back to normal.

Normal. I hoped that this was not normal. I could not get rid of that lingering fear that the person he had been with me had just been another role.

These doubts distracted me enough so I did not notice when Raoul stopped struggling. I only realized he was up to something when his left fist connected almost right on my stitches. The pain shot through my body and my hands automatically released Raoul in order to grab my stomach. I doubled over in pain and sucked in a deep breath of air wanting to scream so loudly. I could not bring attention to myself though. I just could not.

Some part of my consciousness that was not focused solely on the pain that came in white-hot waves through my body noticed Raoul running away from me. I curled into myself on the floor. I needed to move. So much pain. Someone might find me. Raoul might go get help. I had to move, but I could not get my body to do anything but stay frozen as I tried to ride out the pain.

I was beginning to sweat from the pain and the effort it took not to scream in pain. I was panting as though I had just been running. Suddenly, I started to laugh between gasps.

It hurt so much.

I had to move though. I had to catch up to Raoul.

I continued to laugh. It was a hysterical sound, that laughter. How could I catch up to him? I could not even move from this position off the floor. He had hit me. He had hit me in the abdomen when that had been the most sensitive spot. I did not fail to notice the irony of the situation. It was funny in an excruciating pain sort of way.

I deserved this. I deserved all of it.

I may have wanted to leave the Opera Ghost behind. I may have left that role behind me, but his sins were still my own. I wondered how long this would go on. I wondered how long fate would deny me what I truly wanted.

I rolled over and winced. The stitches had come out. My wound was bleeding, but the bandages were adequate enough for now. Currently, I had to chase down a certain Vicomte. I stood up unsteadily and wondered how I could possibly stay on my feet. I leaned partly on the wall and made my way staggering through the empty hallways. Finding a passage entrance, I slipped in and took every shortcut I knew to reach the main hall.

I watched the main hall from a distance since I knew that I was anything but silent at this moment. I could not contain the hisses of pain when moving jarred my wound. The managers, Carlotta, and Christine were on the top of the stairway. Carlotta and Christine were arguing. I allowed myself some satisfaction in the fact that Christine was acting like Carlotta more and more. I scanned the area and found Raoul and the Comte at the bottom of the stairs talking to each other in hushed tones. I was about to move closer when I saw them finish their conversation. I wished I knew about what Raoul and the Comte had been talking.

I could already guess what the others had been yelling to each other about. They had to be arguing about my opera. Carlotta only ever talked about herself and the opera, and since she was there, then it was without a doubt about my opera. I had known the managers would eventually cave in.

Firmin, ever being business minded managed to get a word in between Christine and Carlotta's argument, "You have a duty!"

"I cannot sing it," Christine stepped away from them, "duty or not!"

She looked to Philippe then. Of course, she would. They had an alliance. They had this twisted relationship that was part lurid sexual acts and part mental games. Her eyes pleaded with him, but I could not determine for what reason. She was waiting for his lead. That much was obvious. There was something else in her look though. Had they planned this? Her eyes fell upon Raoul and she hesitated for a moment. She did a double take as though she had not realized that it had been him. At least, I knew that Christine had not been the one to cut his hair. She was rather surprised by it.

Philippe started up the stairs, and like a well-trained dog, Raoul trailed behind him. I leaned against the pillar I hid behind and furiously thought over what I should do. I did not like to see him like this. Raoul looked like he had recovered already from our encounter. It was as though he was not affected at all. If that were true, the Comte's hold over him was stronger than I had thought.

I could do nothing right now though. The Comte probably knew I had confronted Raoul. He would be prepared if I attacked now. I would have to get Raoul when he was away from him. Not wanting to leave Raoul just yet, I relaxed against the pillar and watched the scene unravel before me.

When they had reached the top of the stairs, Andre looked at Raoul in confusion, "Who…?"

Firmin cut him off, "Monsieur le Vicomte."

He nudged Andre. Andre looked flustered, "I almost did not recognize you. I think your haircut looks rather nice."

I rolled my eyes. He did not 'almost not recognize' him. He had not recognized him.

He asked, "Why did you cut it?"

I wondered if Raoul would answer him. I wanted to know. However, I saw the same look of irritation cross his face as when I had been talking about his hair. He would not answer.

Christine commented in a voice that clearly said 'I told you so', "You look rather dashing."

Carlotta stopped her whining for a moment to nod her head in agreement.

They were all staring at him. Yet, he stood confidently and looked at them all indifferently. The arrogance was like a shield to their comments. He did not care what they thought, and he made that fact clearly known. That was not like Raoul at all. Even when he had been the Vicomte, he still had some consideration for others. He looked to Philippe.

"We have all been blind," he commented as though a realization had come upon him, "and yet the answer is staring us in the face."

Everyone's attention suddenly turned to him. The managers were aptly paying attention. All eyes were on him, and I could tell that he was thoroughly enjoying the attention. Raoul stayed partially behind him and waited to hear his plan. I could not bring myself to be impressed. So, the Comte thought he had a plan. He had to know I was listening in on it, but perhaps, that too was part of the plan.

"This could be the chance to ensnare our clever friend…" He once again left them in anticipation.

"We're listening."

"Go on."

They were in the Comte's grasp now. He was playing with their emotions. I glared at him when I noticed that Raoul watched him in admiration. Admiration! I did not know how he could look at him with such an emotion. That was the man that had beat him. I squeezed my hand into a fist and banged it against the pillar. Raoul was watching him aptly.

"We shall play his game – perform his work – but remember we hold the ace," the Comte looked at Christine then. Understanding what he was planning, Christine began to walk away. The Comte followed her and the rest followed him. I trailed a distance away, just close enough to hear and see their expressions.

Raoul finished his thought, "For, if Miss Daae sings, he is certain to attend."

I did not like the approving glance the Comte spared for Raoul nor did I like the pride that Raoul evidently felt for said praise.

That plan might have worked… a few months ago. I no longer cared if Christine sang. I did not want to be here any longer. I just wanted to leave. I just needed a moment alone with Raoul again so that I could kidnap him. I would not make the same mistake twice. I just needed that second chance.

"We make certain the doors are barred," the Comte added.

The managers understood the plan now as well.

"We make certain our men are there…"

"We make certain they're armed."

Christine stopped walking suddenly and spun around at us, "Madness!"

They almost ran into her.

I scoffed at his plan. No amount of bars, men, or guns would ever be enough to stop me when I decided to obtain something. They should know that I knew this opera house better than anyone else. I knew entrances and exits that no one else knew existed. They were lucky and would be disappointed when nothing would happen at Don Juan Triumphant's premier. Madness indeed.

"I'm not so sure," Raoul commented. Christine looked at him as though he had betrayed her. I mentally laughed at that look. She knew betrayal and Raoul's comment was hardly it. I did not believe that Raoul actually thought the plan would work. Did he not know the only thing that would lead me anywhere nowadays was him?

I cursed. He may not have realized it, but I was certain the Comte knew. This plan, there was more to it. He did not know who I was truly after. For all appearances, it would be Christine I wanted. However, current events would have let the Comte come to the conclusion that I wanted Raoul. He did not know which one it was. However, if he allowed the opera to be performed, he increased his chances because firstly, it was my opera. Secondly, Christine would be singing and I had never missed her sing though he would not know that. Thirdly, if my hunch was correct, he would make certain that Raoul would be there that night. If I did not get to Raoul before then, I would be forced to go to the premier.

Easy solution, I would get Raoul before then.

Christine did not seem as upset as she was acting. One could easily tell that she was not wholly against the plan. She was only indulging herself in knowing that she had so much power over them. They had to convince her, and she knew it.

Raoul shrugged at her. I did have to admit. I liked this Vicomte's reactions to Christine. He was simply uninterested in her. She was merely another lower class peon. He replied, "Not if it works."

"This is madness!" She reiterated and began walking away again.

This time the Comte did not follow her. Instead, he turned around and faced the managers as well as Carlotta.

Andre asserted, "The tide will turn."

Carlotta reiterated her belief. She pointed in the direction where Christine had walked away, "She's the one behind this. Christine."

They all looked at her skeptically. It was obvious she was simply upset about not having a larger part. Could she be any more insipid?

"This is all her doing," she continued, "This is the truth."

I ignored her. In fact, everyone did their best to do so.

Firmin spoke over her, "This is his undoing. If you succeed you free us all."

Carlotta stood there indignant that no one was listening to her.

"If Christine helps us in this plan," Andre brought to their attention.

Indeed, the Comte would not have a plan that did not cover all the bases. He would want both Christine and Raoul present in order to ensure my own presence.

Raoul agreed, "If Christine won't, then no one can."

I mentally told Raoul that he could do it, and I grinned at the mental image again.

Carlotta looked at him with disdain.

The Comte cleared his throat to get their attention. When the managers looked at him, he ordered them, "Get everything prepared. Have all the performers ready, but also make certain that we save the date of the premier. Inform the police of our plan now so that they can be well prepared as well. We need many able bodied men."

They nodded.

"But what of Christine?" Firmin asked.

He confidently replied, "You let me worry about such things. Go and have everything prepared. We need this perfect."

I rolled my eyes. All his effort would go to waste. It took months to prepare for an opera even if you sped up the process. That would give me ample amount of time to find some opportune moment to kidnap Raoul.

The managers and Carlotta walked away and I was glad to see that Raoul was about to follow them; maybe my opportunity would arise sooner than expected.

Philippe called him however, "Raoul. You're coming with me."

He nodded and obediently followed him as he walked down the hallway Christine had walked down. Did he have to be so submissive to the man?

"Philippe," he kept stride with him. "We must tread lightly. We have seen him kill. He may do so again."

It was clear that it was not only Philippe and Christine I had to worry about. I had to worry about Raoul as well now. The thought did not sit very well with me, but nothing was sitting well with me today.

The Comte looked away. "I know this well, Raoul." He was silent for a while and I thought he was going to remain so until he commented, "What did you say to him?"

They were talking about me. What would Raoul respond? Surely, he would not reveal everything. However, I did not doubt that the Comte would see right through any lie Raoul tried to tell. He would have to tell him everything. I unfortunately knew that he wanted to tell him everything as well.

"I told him that to repay my debt, I would leave him be unless there was an indication that he meant to harm the opera house again," he replied. He suddenly looked uncertain as to whether he had done the right thing. Looking to Philippe, he was searching for some confirmation. When had he begun to need the Comte's validation for any of his actions?

The Comte mulled over his ultimatum, "As a Vicomte, it was honourable to want to repay your debt to him. However, as the patron, you should have killed him the moment you had a chance."

When Raoul nodded at his words as though they had been the most enlightening statement ever spoken to him, I did not know how long I would be able to watch them. I wanted to leave, but knew that I could not. I could not leave the Comte to his own devices. I especially could not leave Raoul alone either. Every time he was out of my sight, something changed.

"You must kill him," the Comte reinforced, and I did not know how anything worse could happen, "He is a very dangerous man who only wants to exploit you to get to Christine. You must kill him. It is your duty."

Raoul nodded once more. It was settled apparently. If the Comte had said to do so, Raoul would certainly now do it given the opportunity. He had given me the ultimatum before but he had at least not done anything when I had tried to kidnap him. I knew he would not allow me to attempt it again. If I tried and failed to kidnap Raoul, I knew that it would be the last attempt I would ever make. I could not even show myself to him without now having to worry about him killing me.

Christine was a short distance away. She had stopped walking in the middle of the hallway. They paused before she had noticed them, "Help me comfort her." The Comte smiled at Raoul rather evilly. He was scheming once more. I did not know if Raoul knew how much the Comte was the predator and he was the prey. I dreaded to see what the Comte would do. "You know her better." He added and the look was gone.

They walked up to her, and she looked up at them with tears in her eyes.

She smiled weakly at Raoul, "You do look rather handsome with your hair cut, Raoul."

She reached out to touch his hair and I was glad to see him duck under her hand. She had no right to touch him.

He disregarded her statement and told her. "You know why we've come here. Do you not?"

She looked at him distastefully and decided that he was not worth the attention. She knew that he could do nothing for her. Instead, she turned her attention fully on the Comte. Raoul shrugged and moved to the side to watch. It seemed that was as much help as he was going to give. I wondered if I could separate them. I was in both Christine's and Raoul's minds already. It should not be too difficult to reach either of them. I doubted Christine would give away my presence. I was not so certain with Raoul. I would have to proceed with caution.

"Philippe," she moved closer to him, "I'm frightened. Don't make me do this."

Philippe's expression softened but he did not respond.

"Philippe," she tried again, "it scares me. Don't put me through this ordeal by fire."

He held her hands gently in his. I was furious. How could he do that in front of his brother? Raoul should be mad that the very thing that I was certain he had been forbidden to do by the Comte, the Comte so freely did. Though I was technically angry enough for the both of us. He wanted to flaunt their relationship in front of his brother. There was no other explanation. Why though? I had thought that seeing them together would have broken Raoul before, but now he did not seem to care at all. He had already been broken. It was a test. The Comte was testing Raoul. He had even allowed Raoul to meet with me to see what would occur. He had known that Raoul had changed already. I realized what the Comte was planning and I dearly did not want to see the two kiss again.

Christine looked around paranoid. Whispering soft enough that I had to strain my ears to hear, she spoke to Philippe, "He does not want me."

I smiled at her statement. The way she said it almost made up for all the trouble she had caused me. Almost.

Glancing at Raoul, I noticed that he looked as though he doubted it. Honestly speaking, it still appeared as though I wanted her. I had cast her in the lead role in an opera that I had written specifically for her. I had stolen their engagement ring saying, 'Your chains are still mine. You belong to me.' However, I had given my attention to Raoul almost completely after the masquerade. Christine was in my past and I did not want Raoul thinking she meant anything to me.

Raoul caught the Comte's eyes and shrugged.

He nodded shallowly. He considered her statement for a moment and seemed to agree with Raoul, "Perhaps he does not, but I do believe he will appear."

Christine did not look like she appreciated being bait. She pleaded still, "He'll take me, I know." Apparently, she also thought that I would take her if the opportunity presented itself. As though I would bother myself with her. The way she said it though, I did not believe she thought that I would take her alive. Now there was an option I had not even considered. I wondered how she would react to the fact that she had given me an idea to harm her. She was completely convinced that I would, and I had to admit, she was overreacting a bit much. I had only thrown her around a little in the cemetery. I wondered how deeply her betrayal actually ran if she was this frightened. She quickly glanced at Raoul suddenly uncertain if she should go on. I saw Philippe squeeze her hands and nod his head almost imperceptibly at her. "We'll be parted forever. He won't let me go."

They really were going to do this in front of Raoul and in front of me. The man was challenging me. Not only was this a test for Raoul, it was a test for me as well. He wanted to see how far he could push us.

The Comte called her name soothingly, "Christine."

I called out to her as well. The familiar echo bounced through the passageway and through the walls. The Comte did not hear it. I had not thought he would. Christine and Raoul though obviously did. Raoul's back suddenly stiffened and he looked around nervously.

Christine pulled her hands away from the Comte's as though she had been burned. She turned from him and took a few steps away. She gazed into the middle distance and began to sing. She was trying to appease me with her voice, "What I once used to dream, I now dread. If he finds me, it won't ever end. And he'll always be there…"

I was surprised when Raoul finished her song, "Singing songs in my head."

Her head whipped in my direction, and I could not help but stare at him in confusion. He had sung that line. I wanted to know what had possessed him to sing that line. I held my breath in anticipation waiting for something more. I did not know what, but I felt as though if he sang more, it was a sign. Something compelled him to finish the song, "He'll always be there, singing songs in my head."

I let go of the breath I had been holding. Relief welled inside me. Relief and hope. Raoul had been affected by me. He was not just that obedient lap dog to the Comte because I had managed to reach something in him that I was certain that the Comte could not even reach. I did not think anyone but I could reach it.

The Comte cleared his throat and broke the spell in which he had been. Christine also snapped out of her surprise. He walked towards her ignoring Raoul completely for the moment, "You said yourself he was nothing but a man."

He did not step closer than an arm's length away. Christine looked ready to bolt.

Raoul too tried to reason with her, "Yet while he lives, he will haunt us till we're dead."

He was half-right in that statement. I would haunt him until he was dead.

Christine looked between them and once again looked away. I had seen the answer in her eyes however. She had long since decided what she would do. I believed that she had decided since the main hall when she had looked to the Comte to lead the way. She was only disagreeing for… for whom? Was she playing innocent for me? This new fear she held for me told me otherwise. She was acting for the Comte. She was being the uncertain damsel. I was certain the Comte would appreciate the effort. He seemed narcissistic enough to love being considered the hero. Once the news got wind of these proceedings, they would greedily eat it up and his name would be glorified even more.

She sang once more. I wondered not for the first time in my life if she liked to hear her own voice, "Twisted every way, what answer can I give? Am I to risk my life, to win the chance to live?"

The Comte closed the distance between them finally. He too had seen the decision in her eyes. He gently took her in his arms.

"Can I betray the man who once inspired my voice?"

I scoffed silently to myself. Christine had already betrayed me. She had betrayed me by clinging onto Raoul. Then she betrayed both Raoul and me by clinging onto his brother. I was angrier for Raoul's sake than my own. I had known her character and still I let her blind me with her beauty. I felt great satisfaction in knowing that the Comte would betray her in turn. He was not a stupid man. I wondered if they would both become caught in each other's web of lies though. The games they played were deadly. Still, the real worry I held was for Raoul. Would he still be nothing but an innocent pawn in it all?

"Do I become his prey? Do I have any choice? He kills without a thought; he murders all that's good. I know I can't refuse and yet, I wish I could."

Once again, Christine showed her true opinion of me. She would never say those things to me, but she so easily did so when she was certain others would show her pity. Admittedly, she had always been like that. It was the tragedy of it all.

She turned around in his loose embrace and finally looked him in the eyes. "Oh God, if I agree, what horrors wait for me in this, the Phantom's opera?"

He replied, "Christine, Christine, don't think that I don't care."

Raoul looked a bit shaken still. I wondered what was bothering him. I knew it was not the affection that the Comte and Christine were showing each other.

The Comte looked uncertain what to say next. He knew Christine wanted to be consoled but Raoul did know her better. He snapped out of his stupor and sang, "But every hope and every prayer rests on you now."

She looked at him briefly but took the words as though the Comte had sung them himself. I saw the Comte grin at her with that customary challenge in his eyes. His hand slipped behind her head and closed the distance between them.

They kissed deeply, almost lewdly. I could tell that Philippe was trying to make a point. He was clearly claiming Christine as his own. He was clearly challenging me. He need not put on such a production of it all. He already had the one thing I wanted, and that man was watching them in boredom. I was torn between being glad he was unaffected or angry that he was not. I could imagine Raoul being outraged at seeing them kiss. Perhaps that was only the concept of Raoul I had in my mind.

Raoul diverted his eyes after a while. He looked down the empty hallway and stared at the walls. It was almost as though he were trying to look through them. I smiled when I realized he was trying to look through the walls. I enjoyed the feeling of knowing he was thinking about me. I did not know whether he was plotting a way to kill me or just wondering where I was. In the end, it did not matter because I now had proof that I had really gotten to him. I could do so again.

Raoul was impatiently shifting from side to side. The Comte and Christine had stopped kissing and they were whispering to each other. I could not hear their words, but I could see that Christine was surprised. She however looked pleased about the outcome of the kiss.

"Raoul," The Comte called.

I called him as well. It echoed in the hallway and Raoul looked perplexed. He had heard me. Seeing that the Comte did not react, Raoul visibly relaxed. He turned around to face him.

The Comte placed his hand on his back and led him forward. I snarled at him. He was not allowed to touch him. No one was. They began walking back towards the entrance of the opera house.

"I want to talk to you," the Comte started, "I'm very proud of the way you acted today. You've shown a lot of improvement since when I came."

Raoul nodded, pleased that he had garnered his praise. Just when I was beginning to feel better about this situation… I tensed and was forced to lean against the wall. Maybe these bandages were not enough. There was something more the Comte wanted to say though.

"You must remember though that the Opera Ghost cannot be reasoned with. No matter what, it's your duty as a Vicomte to kill him. Do you understand?"

"Yes," He nodded. It was as though he was brainwashing him.

When Raoul told him he did not need convincing, I felt as though any progress I could have been making had been eradicating. The Comte had the nerve to smile smugly back at him.

"I know you don't need convincing. I will be dealing with much of the specifics in the meantime. I would like you to guard Christine."

Why was fate so cruel? Raoul was going to watch Christine? There was a good side to this idea. It meant that Raoul and the Comte would be separated, but nothing good ever came from watching Christine. Trouble seemed to follow her or was it that she was the cause of all the trouble?

He nodded, but I was glad that he looked loathed to do so.

The Comte must have also seen his hesitation for he continued, "It's the gentlemanly thing to do. You have been childhood friends. It's proper."

"I understand." He immediately responded. The Comte's satisfied look was the last thing I saw as they exited the opera house. I slid to the ground. There would be some moment before the premier that I would kidnap Raoul.

There was still hope. I slowly made my way back down to my home the emotions within me warring.

I had failed Raoul. I had promised myself that I would protect him, and I had not. The worst may have indeed happened to him, and I had been nowhere near.

I walked slowly through my home looking at everything. There were signs of my obsession with Christine everywhere. Paintings of her, the mannequin, poems, songs, all about her. In a wave of fury, I grabbed everything that reminded me of her and threw it on the swan bed. I ripped the veil, dismembered the mannequin. I took the oil paintings, threw them against the wall behind the swan bed, and with joy saw it splinter into pieces.

Even though my wound was still bleeding freely and now furiously, I dragged the swan bed onto the lakeshore. Grabbing the nearest candle and with a yell that I was certain reached the heavens, I threw it onto the bed and watched it burst into flames.

All my energy seemed to drain from my body in that heat. My legs gave way under me and dropped onto the floor gracelessly. The blood had soaked through my bandages as well as through my shirt.

I had to stitch myself up soon, but I stared into the fire instead.

o.o.o

The premier of Don Juan Triumphant was fast approaching.

I got more frustrated as each day passed.

Raoul had been in the opera house for the first few weeks. He had been here everyday watching Christine. It should have been the perfect opportunity to kidnap him. However, the Comte had two personal guards watching him. He never had a moment alone when he was in the opera house. Either the Comte knew what I had been planning or he was just well prepared.

Even with the guards, I had tried. I had tried to lure him away and it seemed a few times that it had been working. However, he was so far. Why did he seem so far?

I watched him from a distance. Christine had stopped giving him dirty looks. She simply accepted his presence. Sometimes I would catch her looking at him rather wistfully, and I wondered if she could possibly feel badly for having used him. However, that look was not one of remorse. She was only looking at because he had changed. He had changed into someone she would have enjoyed manipulating. Those moments would pass and she would come to herself. She would shake her head and return to the rehearsals. She had the Comte now.

At least I knew she would leave him alone.

It was disheartening this process of trying to lure him away and failing day after day after day. He was in my opera house. He was so close. Raoul was out of my reach though. Mentally, and then after a few weeks physically. One day he simply stopped showing.

The Comte was forcing me to show at Don Juan Triumphant. He wanted me to do something. It was as though he were daring me to. If things came to that, I would not disappoint.

I would find a way to get Raoul. If I had to play the Comte's game, if I had to kidnap Christine, if I had fight Raoul, I would do it all to get him. He belonged with me. It was inevitable.

o.o.o

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End ch20

word count: 14,637

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A/N: Don't forget to R/R (Read and Review)!

Chapter review: story on hiatus until I can get my head straight. It was so hard writing this chapter and I think you can tell. There are just three more chapters and I really want them to be good ones, but I'm a bit frazzled now. Maybe not so much a hiatus as give me two weeks and hopefully things'll be better then.