Unmasking the Chains

by Lucifer Rosemaunt

ErikRaoul slash fic. It's dark, it's different, it's the continuation of A Mask for All Occasions. Erik and Raoul make different choices and take different paths that converge to one. Warning: character death. Complete.

22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer: Please don't sue. I don't own POTO... All I own is an overactive imagination.

Summary: ErikRaoul slash (finally). Story continuation of A Mask for All Occasions. Changes!

Warning(s): Mild violence. Slash (homosexual content).

Pairing(s): ErikRaoul

Story note: That's quite an evil cliffhanger.

o.o.o.o

Unmasking the Chains

Chapter 22

o.o.o.o

By: Lucifer Rosemaunt

o.o.o.o

Erik's POV

o.o.o

Last time:

It was disheartening this process of trying to lure him away and failing day after day after day. He was in my opera house. He was so close. Raoul was out of my reach though. Mentally, and then after a few weeks physically. One day he simply stopped showing.

The Comte was forcing me to show at Don Juan Triumphant. He wanted me to do something. It was as though he were daring me to. If things came to that, I would not disappoint.

I would find a way to get Raoul. If I had to play the Comte's game, if I had to kidnap Christine, if I had to fight Raoul, I would do it all to get him. He belonged with me. It was inevitable.

o.o.o

Tonight was the night.

After all the rehearsals that the Opera Populaire had been having, the preparations that had been made in response to the law enforcement that had been called, and my seemingly long separation from Raoul, everything was going to come to fruition.

I was restless the entire morning. I barely had any sleep the night before. I was nervous and excited. I would finally see Raoul again. I would have my chance to take him back.

Honestly, I had been restless these past weeks not just this morning. I had not had a single peaceful night's rest either. How could I rest knowing that Raoul wanted to kill me? How many regrets did I have? Before all this happened, I had no regrets. I did not care who I hurt, who I killed, and what I did to get what I wanted. I did not regret my actions because I considered it only fair considering the hand that fate had dealt me. After all the injustices I had gone through, it was only fair that I obtain whatever I wanted through whatever means I saw fit.

I did not have any regrets until Raoul. I would have done so many things differently with him. I had never felt this way about anyone before. He consumed every thought I had, every emotion I felt. He consumed me. I had had so many chances with him. He was deposited into my hands at least three times, and each of those times, I let him go. And, as much as I said I would protect him, I could not. I did not. I had failed, and because of that failure, he was gone. The Raoul I knew was gone.

It's just that it had been so much easier to push him away. It was easier to get mad at him and punish him for the confusion I felt. It was easier to believe that whatever I felt was simply a passing emotion.

Wanting Christine had hurt too much. She had disappointed me every way possible. Betrayal hurt, and Raoul paid the price for what she had done. Trying to not love Raoul though hurt so much more.

It was not as though I could deny it any longer. Raoul was everything I wanted. He had somehow made me realize that I had compassion, I had pity, and more importantly, that I was not alone. For a while, I had considered myself to be as much of a monster as everyone believed, and even when I began to deny it, there had been that part of me that still believed I was only a monster. He had given me so much, and I refused to give up on him. I refused to admit that I had been defeated by the Comte.

It was not as though I did not know what they were planning. The managers could hardly keep a secret. The increase of guards at the doors and the planning sessions that had been held hardly screamed secret. I knew their plan.

I had a plan of my own. They expected me to act as I had in the past. They expected mere parlour tricks. I would not be racing through the rafters or dropping scenery. I would not be in the ceiling. I had written the opera, and it was my prerogative to be in it. I was Don Juan after all. I still believed that I could reach Raoul somehow. He had been well guarded before, but now, I would have my opportunity.

If the Comte wanted to challenge me, then I would challenge him in turn. Seeing how Raoul had been recently acting, he would follow. He wanted to kill me. I could use that to my advantage. As much as I wanted to simply kidnap Raoul, the closest person I could get to at the performance was neither the Comte nor Raoul. It was actually Christine. She would be on stage, and I would be there with her.

I had watched them practicing my opera. I knew the exact part I would switch with Piangi. Watching Don Juan Triumphant annoyed me though. It reminded me of what I used to be, of who I used to be. I was no longer that person. That person had been left in the cemetery.

I spent the morning walking around checking and rechecking my passageways. I was not worried that anyone would have found them. I had lived beneath the opera house for so many years and no one so far found my passageways. I roamed the passageways simply because I did not know what else to do. I was not used to being patient. I was not used to waiting for what I wanted. I usually just took it.

The morning passed extremely slowly. I asked myself constantly. Was I ready for this?

Was I?

Unfortunately, I came up with the same answer every time. I was not. I was nowhere near ready. I was ready for many things now. I was ready to perform my opera. I was ready to face down a hundred soldiers if I had to. I was ready to confront both Christine and the Comte. I was ready to risk my life for Raoul.

I was not ready however, to face the Raoul who wanted to kill me.

I knew that I could not die just yet, but I could not bring myself to want to hurt him. I could not even imagine intentionally attacking him anymore. I had told myself that I would protect him, and even though I could not and had not protected him from everyone else, I would protect him from myself.

When the opera house finally opened and began to let the audience in, I felt anxious and relieved at once. What would happen would happen. I could not stop it. I would face my destiny tonight, and I hoped that it involved a happy ending. It could not be so much to ask for a happy ending after everything that had happened.

I went to my home and dressed. I stood in front of the mirror and looked at myself. I hated my reflection. I hated everything about my deformity. It had driven everyone away. That was not entirely true though. Raoul had never seen my face, and I had still driven him away.

I had changed though. I was not the same person I had been from before, and I was proud of that. I could admit that I had changed only because of Raoul. What could I do with this change? It was not as though I could suddenly go out into the public now that I decided I would stop killing people. I would not be accepted with open arms just because I stopped considering myself to be a monster. They would still scream and yell. They would all still try to kill me.

No, change did not mean things would get better. It did not mean that people would treat me differently because I felt differently. The change I had gone through simply meant that I would no longer allow myself to be caged. I would not allow myself to wallow in the despair that I had created for myself. I was my own worst enemy, and with this change, I could stop that. I could be freed from the cage I had allowed myself to be trapped in. I could find freedom and maybe that freedom was with Raoul.

Although there was still plenty of time before the opera really began, I dressed up in my costume and slipped on a mask. I wanted to be upstairs to catch sight of Raoul the moment he walked in. I hoped that there was some sort of change in his demeanor from the last time we met. Maybe he was only acting for the sake of fooling the Comte. That would have made sense if the Comte had been around when we had been talking. I knew I was lying to myself with such thoughts, but I could only hope I would not have to fight him.

I raced to the stage and checked the trap door. I would kidnap Christine to infuriate the Comte. The Comte and thusly Raoul would follow me down to my lair where I would trap them. I would leave the Comte and Christine in the cellar and take Raoul with me. It seemed simple enough. There were more intricate details, but that was the basic gist.

The thought had of course crossed my mind that I would like to kill Christine and the Comte, but I knew that I should not. There was no point in doing so. My attention to them had always been my downfall. I should just take Raoul and leave. We would go somewhere… I did not know where, but anywhere away from Paris and away from his family and Christine would be ideal.

Seeing that everything was in working order, I made a quick detour to Box 5. There was a guard by the door, but he hardly noticed when I used a secret panel to enter and exit the box leaving a present for Raoul. I would have to make sure that it would be Raoul who received it. I could always just follow the Comte and Raoul. I had already planned to do so. Finished with that task, I left to wait by the front doors. Already waiting at the doors were the managers and a group of soldiers. I wondered if they understood anything about subtlety.

Andre was nervously fidgeting with his sleeve. He looked around and forced smiles at the incoming regulars. The regulars were always the first ones to the opera. They liked to mingle with the other elite. I wondered why none of them was smart enough to realize that something was off. I knew that some of the guards were not in plain sight, but the ones that were would surely raise some questions. However, looking at the number of carriages pulling up, it would appear as though the full house had been sold. These people were completely obtuse.

"Are you sure this will work?" Andre asked.

Firmin looked around and greeted a few people who passed, "It has to, Andre. We know he will be here."

Andre nodded vigorously.

Firmin added, "The Comte seems very certain as well."

"Yes, about that…" Andre did not seem impressed. At least one of the managers had the brains to realize the Comte was not to be trusted. I was simply surprised that it was Andre.

Andre was not able to finish for the Chagny carriage pulled up at that moment.

My heart sped up. It had been far too long. I had hardly wanted to separate for a mere day before being separated for weeks.

Raoul was the first one to exit the carriage. The managers and the soldiers that followed them hurriedly greeted him before pushing him aside to speak to the Comte.

Raoul frowned at them, and I was glad to see him. I had reconciled the idea of him having short hair, but I had forgotten how handsome he looked now that you could clearly see his face. Short hair was not a terrible idea. He watched as the Comte stepped out of the carriage, and I watched him. I did not care very much about the Comte. He was merely a nuisance that I was forced to confront. I would not let him distract me from Raoul anymore.

Looking at him, I knew automatically that he was not my Raoul. He was still that evil mixture between Comte and Vicomte that I had encountered earlier. At least, he looked alive and well. It appeared as though he was sleeping and eating better than the last time we had separated. He was not walking uncomfortably, so I could surmise that he had not been given any more wounds. Overall, as far as bad news went, this was amazingly good.

The Comte climbed down from the carriage and motioned the managers to stop talking, "No need to be in such a state. You will make our audience uneasy."

Firmin whispered hoarsely, "You do not think they will not be nervous with all the soldiers around?"

I saw Raoul smirk. I had not quite expected that. Before, Raoul had this odd hero worship of the Comte. He had followed him like a dog followed his master. He had been subservient to the Comte, but just now, he had openly smirked when Firmin had clearly disagreed with him. Did this mean that Raoul was less under the Comte's control? Did this change anything?

The Comte ignored the comment. "Let us go in shall we," he started to walk. The managers walked beside him talking to him, and the guards followed so closely that Raoul was forced to walk at the very back of the group.

I too followed them closely, never once taking my eyes off Raoul. I wanted to see if I could avoid this whole opera. All I needed was a moment alone with Raoul. I could see that both Raoul and the Comte were armed with swords. Not to mention the fact that there were a number of guards around them. It would be difficult to find a moment when he would be alone. Even if there was a moment, he would probably struggle which would then get everyone's attention. As confident as I was with my skills in battle, I would lose in an unequal fight. There were just too many guards.

I spared some of my attention to the managers and the Comte. They were talking about their plan again. I swear they might as well have posted up a sign saying what the plan was with all the time they spoke of it. I even knew it by now. It was simple really. Lock the doors. Wait for the signal. Then shoot to kill. There really was not much else to it, and I had heard it so many times that I hoped they would just put up a sign. I was thankful that their plan was not more complicated or else they might get confused. Thanks to that simplicity though, I would have a lot off leeway in my actions. They were setting up a trap, and it was an easy one to get around.

I doubted that was it though. I knew that the Comte would not be stupid enough to think that I would not hear the plan. He could not be stupid enough to think that I would fall for such a simple trap. He was planning something else, and I was not sure who else knew about it. From the look of Raoul's bored expression and the new rebellious streak I saw earlier, I doubted that he knew that the Comte was planning something else. I had to be a little more careful now.

Raoul began to look around suspiciously. At first, he had been observing the others as they mingled and talked. A year ago, he would have been doing the same thing. He would have been making his way around to each individual promoting the Opera Populaire and proving how wonderful a patron he was. He would have kept many of the people that way. He had been charming then in a way that was thoroughly fake. They would not have recognized it because they were fake as well. Now, he was looking past the people into the dark corners of every foyer and up at the ceiling. He was looking for me, and I wondered if he realized I was following him. He surprised me by grabbing the hilt of his sword and glaring at a wall very close to where I was watching.

I did not think he had been that observant before. He definitely knew that I was watching him. Unless he did that every now and then just to fool me. He turned his attention away from me and towards the Comte.

The Comte was ordering the guards to go to different places around the opera house and to wait for the signal. Hearing the phrase, 'shoot to kill' so often was very ominous. Raoul looked like he was about to say something to the Comte but he quickly closed his mouth. I wondered why he kept it a secret that I was following them. He knew I was. It would have been helpful to know that your prey was watching as you set the trap. While I did not think that Raoul had done it for my sake, I thought it was a good sign that he no longer told the Comte everything.

This made me hope that the note I had written him would be able to sway his judgment.

Sending the managers to their seats, the Comte and Raoul headed towards the stage. I followed, knowing that Christine would be waiting for them. I had not been watching Christine very much these past few weeks except during the times when she practiced my opera. It was inevitable. I needed to know how they were handling my opera, and she happened to be the lead. I no longer had a reason to follow her though. I knew that she interacted with the Comte quite a bit during her free time. I knew that they were quite physical with each other, but I no longer cared what she did. Watching those two only served to anger me. When I was that angry, I tended to destroy parts of the opera house, so I only watched them when absolutely necessary.

I had stopped talking with Madame Giry as well. She had tried to contact me a few times, but I refused. I had fallen apart for a few days at the beginning when I kept failing to get Raoul. I had never failed at something so consistently. I could not remember a time when I had failed at anything. Although my life was hardly a success, if I wanted to draw, I could draw well. If I wanted to write music, I could compose an opera the likes no one had ever heard before. If I wanted anything, I had been able to obtain it. Even when I had wanted Christine, I had been able to kidnap her.

With Raoul, it was one failure after another. It had been devastating. I had not known failure. I had not known how so much effort could obtain nothing.

When we arrived backstage, Christine was pacing. I smiled at her anxiety. It was only fair since I was anxious myself. She was lucky I would not kill her. Meg was nearby trying to comfort her, but she looked distracted as well. I knew that if Meg was near, Madame Giry was near as well. She had not liked the fact that I had cut off all exchanges with her. She would worry over her daughter. It took me a moment but I saw her quite a distance away, but fixedly watching her daughter. Carlotta was loudly complaining to anyone who would listen, and Piangi was fussing with his cloak. None of the performers looked very well. I had never seen them so anxious before. I almost felt bad for them. I laughed to myself. I did not feel bad for them at all actually. I was glad they were nervous. I was glad they were afraid. It meant that I would not have to do very much to get their attention. If they feared me, they would stay away and everything would go as planned.

When Meg saw them walking towards her, she acknowledged their presence with a small tilt of her head before leaving. Christine finally took notice of them when Meg left. She ran to the Comte hugging him. I heard the Comte whisper in her ear, "It's quite alright. We'll be here every step of the way."

She nodded but held onto him longer. The sight did not fail to anger me. Raoul did not seem to care. I was glad for it because my Raoul would have been hurt to see a scene like that. I still wanted to injure them for having the gall to touch each other so freely in front of both Raoul and me. Of all the insolent things to do… I would get back at the Comte any way I could.

They ignored Raoul, and I wondered if everyone was going to ignore Raoul. If they were going to ignore him, then his absence should not be missed. He once again did not seem to care. Instead, he turned his attention to his surroundings. He must know that I had been following him. He was so intent on finding me. If only that desire was not connected to his desire to kill me, I would have liked the attention.

I heard Christine whisper quietly, "Does he know?" She indicated to Raoul.

The Comte shook his head almost imperceptibly. "I do not think he would approve."

She narrowed her eyes at him, "Then make him approve."

He once again shook his head. He motioned for her to stand off to the side before turning to Raoul. Seeing Raoul inattentive, the Comte put a hand on his shoulder. I glared at him. He should not touch Raoul. I was ready to reveal myself and force our confrontation to this very moment. However, he released Raoul's shoulder and suggested.

"Why don't you go on ahead to Box 5?"

I agreed with that suggestion. If Raoul went ahead, then at least I would not have to worry about the Comte getting the note first.

He nodded and left with two guards following. I hated those guards. At least if Raoul had been alone, I might have had a chance to speak to him. I doubted that even if I tried to simply speak with him, he would listen. He knew how to use his sword and apparently, he had no qualms against hurting me. It would have been nice though to be able to speak to him before this whole plan, this whole scenario occurred. That was just wishful thinking though. I had never been one to just talk. I was a man of action, a man forced to take action. Our conversation would just have to wait.

He entered Box 5 and looked out over the audience.

It was a full house as I had expected it to be. I noticed Raoul look towards the stage where the Comte and Christine would have been standing, but the curtains blocked any sight he could have had of them. I wondered what he was thinking. Was he jealous? I doubted that. His apathy towards Christine was probably the only trait I liked about his new personality.

He was about to sit down when he finally realized that there was a rose on top of a note on the seat. I had wondered if he was going to sit on it before realizing it was there. He picked up the rose and saw that there was a black ribbon tied to it. He frowned slightly. Who else could it have been from? He was sitting in my box, and Christine must have told him about the black ribbon. He looked around the box and I felt his eyes skim over my hiding spot, but he found nothing else to be out of place.

He picked up the note and read:

Raoul

Since you have failed in our initial agreement, if you remember the terms well enough you should realize that the ultimatum you had given me was void. If you wish to have your memory refreshed, I believe the deal was that if you had stayed within the opera house for seven days, I would return the ring to you. If you failed, you would expect nothing from me and since your desires will mean nothing to me, I would do as I please. I will hold you to that agreement for I remember you to be an honourable man.

Furthermore, the ultimatum you gave to me on that seventh day hardly covers the debt you have incurred. You will have to find some other means to repay me for my kindness. I would be glad to offer you several suggestions. Though I fear you will still try to kill me, I hope you will at least stay and enjoy my opera. I do believe it will be enlightening.

Erik

I had written the note trying to appeal to his 'honour.' He had focused on how much he was a Vicomte that I hoped he would realize that killing me was not the answer. Halfway through the letter though, I realized a note was nothing compared to what the Comte must have been doing to him. It was nothing compared to the brainwashing Raoul experienced at home, so I ended the letter with what I had been thinking at the time.

Not surprisingly, after being able to touch Raoul so freely when he was unconscious, not many completely pure thoughts ran through my mind when thinking about him.

I was pleased to see him blush. He frowned and stared at the letter.

"Vicomte?"

He turned to the guard who had spoken. I too looked at him. He was disturbing the moment for me. I half expected Raoul to tell the guard to get the Comte or report that the letter had been sent. The letter practically said I would do something during the opera – although I considered that a given already.

"Is something the matter?"

Raoul shook his head and turned away from him. He walked to the railing and let his gaze wander. He was deep in thought. I wondered what he was thinking.

The letter inevitably reminded me of that day. Sure, it reminded me of the first day that Raoul had denied me anything. It reminded me of when Raoul suddenly changed. However, I remembered the days seven days before then. I remembered Raoul in my arms, holding me. I remembered his smiles and his expressions. I remembered eating with him and watching him sleep. I remembered touching him, and I wanted those moments back. I wanted to touch him. He did not belong anywhere but with me, and the Comte had taken that away from me.

Everything had changed, and I wanted to make the Comte pay dearly for what he had done. I almost wanted to be that person who would kill him. Somehow, I knew that if I even tried, Raoul would be lost to me forever. So, I could not. I would have to find some other way to get back at him, but I could not kill him.

Raoul stared at the rose for a while. I stared at Raoul.

The Comte entered the box and called Raoul's name.

He started at Philippe's voice and for some reason quickly hid the note in his jacket.

Was he that embarrassed by what I had written? Whatever the reason for his hiding the note, at least, I knew he would not be revealing anything prematurely about my true affections towards Raoul.

"Philippe?" He turned around holding the rose, "What are you doing here?"

The Comte looked at him suspiciously. I knew he had not seen Raoul hide the note. He reached out and grabbed the rose from his hand. "A gift from an admirer," he mocked.

I smiled, but it was short-lived. I could try to fool myself all I wanted about the Comte's knowledge of my affections towards Raoul, but he knew that there was something more than what I had revealed. I had tried to kidnap Raoul. What else would he think?

Raoul frowned at him, "You know very well who it is from. And, you haven't answered my question."

The Comte sat down picking off some imaginary lint from his jacket. "We," he began, "Christine and I that is. We have decided that it would be best if you were waiting in the wings of the stage since you are better acquainted with the Opera Ghost and I would simply be guessing."

I rolled my eyes. I hardly believed that excuse. They did not want to leave Raoul alone. I could not be certain of the exact reason, but they did not want Raoul in this box. I did not like it.

Raoul did not seem to think anything was amiss as he simply nodded his head.

"I told her I could very well tell when a masked man appeared, but she said she would not be risking her life if I could not notice his presence quickly enough," the Comte grinned, "So, you are to stand there and be her guard."

I stared at the Comte trying to figure him out. His motives were always convoluted. I could only guess what his true motives were.

"I understand," Raoul responded before turning to leave. We were both almost out the door when Philippe commented.

"I'll be watching you."

Raoul did not bother to turn around and neither did I. It did not matter if the Comte said he was watching. It only meant that he would watch as I took Raoul away from him.

As we headed back toward the stage, Raoul continually looked over his shoulder. A guard was following, but I knew he was not looking at him. I wondered why Raoul could suddenly tell when I was watching him. He had never noticed before.

When he reached the stage, he stood to the side by Christine. I watched them expecting some sort of exchange. They used to be childhood friends. Was that not the reason Raoul had gone as far as threatening me? That should not have changed. What of his honour? However, they did not exchange a single word. He ignored her, and though she sneaked peaks at him, she did not say anything to him. I wondered if she had ever felt anything for him. There had to have been a time when she had seen him more than just a Vicomte. It no longer mattered. There was nothing between them now.

The orchestra was preparing and the lights were being dimmed. The opera was about to begin. I looked at Raoul one more time hoping that what I was about to do would bring us together. This was all part of the plan. Everything was falling into place so far, but would everything turn out well?

I quickly noted where all the guards were. They were everywhere. The managers definitely wanted to succeed in catching me. I slipped into rafters to watch as they pulled the curtains back. The music began and I was amused to see the reaction on everyone's faces. The performers at least continued even though the audience looked less than pleased with the sound that was coming forth from the orchestra pit. The audience including the Comte grimaced and held their ears. It was to be expected. I had written this opera as though I myself were the music. It was simply the reaction they would have had to viewing my face.

I glanced towards Raoul. He was not grimacing. He was not shying away from the sound. It was more like he was concentrating on hearing it more clearly. I looked at him in awe. He never failed to amaze me. Whoever wanted to kill me, Raoul was still somewhere in there. He was still listening to my music, to my words, to me. I had to reach him somehow and I knew how.

The song I was going to trade places with Piangi for. Point of No Return was our song. When I had first written it, I thought that I should be worried that Raoul's words had set the song into motion. His presence, not hers. His words, not hers. His voice, not hers. I had wondered if the desire I felt while writing the song was his as well. They were. These thoughts, these feelings that had come through in the song were not for Christine. They had never been for Christine. They were for him.

At the time, I had thought the song to be important, but I had not realized that it would be this important.

I noticed him wince when Carlotta's voice shrieked on a high note. I glared at her when I saw her fighting with another performer on whose hand should be above the other. I did not have the time to deal with her juvenile behaviour though. Piangi had stepped on to the stage.

Passarino, faithful friend,
once again recite the plan.

Your young guest believes I'm you -
I, the master, you, the man
When you met you wore my cloak,
with my scarf you hid your face.
She believes she dines with me,
in her master's borrowed place!

I sang along in my head. I could visualize the sheet music and listened as the third trombone missed a note. They had not listened to my suggestions. However, I would be surprised if they could find someone at all who would work for the theatre. It was not like it truly mattered. I would be leaving the opera house soon enough. Old habits die hard though.

I watched Raoul waiting for some indication that he would realize what I had done to this song. He was looking around the stage looking for me. I had told him to pay attention to the opera.

Furtively, we'll scoff and quaff,
stealing what, in truth, is mine.
When it's late and modesty
starts to mellow, with the wine ...

I smirked when his head whipped towards Piangi. At least I knew he was listening.

He looked so confused. How deep did he bury that memory?

Christine stared at him in worry. Raoul shook his head. She glared at him before turning her attention back at the stage. No, she bypassed the stage and looked towards Box 5, towards the Comte. I did not like the looks they shared with each other. It always made me wary. Raoul also glanced in that direction.

Would he remember why this song was special?

You come home! I use your voice -
slam the door like crack of doom!
I shall say: "come - hide with me!
Where, oh, where? Of course - my room!"

I saw Raoul focusing on Christine. After he had ignored her so much, I wondered why he would watch her now. The better question would be why wasn't he paying attention to my opera?

He looked around the stage once more. In any case, I knew I was in his thoughts. Adjusting his jacket, his hand paused over the pocket. His cheeks reddened a bit, and I knew he had remembered the note in his pocket.

I just needed to lower his defenses a little more. I needed him to be open to me. As it was now, he would only fight me before I could get a word in.

Poor thing hasn't got a chance!
Here's my hat, my cloak and sword.
Conquest is assured,
if I do not forget myself and laugh ...

He paused again, but I could no longer watch him. Piangi had gone behind the curtain and this was my cue.

I jumped down from my hiding place and choked Piangi making sure I did not kill him. There was no need. All my anger was directed at a different individual. He passed out and I tied him up and gagged him in case he woke up sooner than I planned. I took his cloak and draped it over myself making sure my face was completely hidden. I took a deep breath and readied myself.

"... no thoughts
within her head,
but thoughts of joy!
No dreams
within her heart
but dreams of love!"

I had never realized Raoul had been poetic until that moment, but when he had said those words in such a self-deprecating manner, I could not help but take notice. How could the Vicomte I had known be so humble? I still could not believe how blind I had been, how much I had been willing to believe such an obvious mask.

Dreams of love. I had not even realized I had been searching for that. I had merely been searching for freedom. I had merely been looking for a way out of my darkness and loneliness. In all truths, I had thought that I was only taking what I deserved. I had wanted Christine and therefore believed that she was meant to be with me. To go to the ends of the earth for someone had seemed obvious. What had been less obvious to me was the particular someone.

I stepped onto the stage and grinned despite myself. All eyes were on me and they had no idea what was in store for them. The cloak hung low over my face. I knew that once I began to sing, they would realize who I was. I knew for certain that Christine would realize. So, too would Madame Giry realize and I hoped Raoul as well, but I knew that I could captivate the rest of the audience easily.

Master?

Passarino - go away!
For the trap is set and waits for its prey ...

I heard a gasp and I looked towards Raoul. Good. He had realized that it was I. The cloak had a gauze-like quality so that I could see through it. Although not much was clear, I could see him standing stock still facing my direction. I could not see his eyes, and I took a step closer towards him in an effort to see his face clearer.

I was glad that I could still affect him, glad that my voice could still reach him. Though glancing to the audience, I knew they were entranced by my voice as well.

Christine had stiffened. She had noticed my entrance. I wondered how she would warn the Comte. She was staring off to the side. I doubted it was indecision that had her facing away from the Comte because I knew her betrayal was set. I would see it again tonight. The only thing that varied was how she would do so.

You have come here
in pursuit of
your deepest urge,
in pursuit of
that wish,
which till now
has been silent,
silent ...

Singing this song made me remember that conversation. It reminded me of every event that occurred in between. I had been such a different person then that it felt as though it was not my own memory. I was just a third party watching that Raoul and that Phantom talking to each other.

How could things have changed so horribly?

I could not help but think of this as our song though. I had turned the sentiment to some woman because at the time I had still desired Christine. However, this song was wholly made up of Raoul and me. I focused on him even as I stepped towards Christine.

I realized belatedly that everyone had gathered around the edges of the stage also entranced by my voice. I forced myself to look away from Raoul long enough to look out into the audience. They watched raptly.

Why was it so easy to have them accept me when they could not see me? Truly, my face had forced me to live underneath the opera house. Truly, this deformity had denied me of all the love that a child should receive.

I have brought you,
that our passions
may fuse and merge -
in your mind
you've already
succumbed to me
dropped all defenses
completely succumbed to me -
now you are here with me:
no second thoughts,
you've decided,
decided ...

As I sang the last lines of that verse, I focused all my attention onto Raoul. I needed him to feel as though he had decided. I needed him to remember a time when he had not wanted to kill me. His decision had been one that was the furthest from violence. Violence was not Raoul. I did not want to reconcile the two thoughts. Violence was the Comte and I knew that Raoul did not want to be like him.

I knew my voice had its desired affect when Raoul stared back, and though he could not see my eyes, I stared directly into his. I needed Raoul to realize what was happening. This was not him. This was not the person I had been slowly accepting, and my acceptance was something that could not be earned. It was something that was stolen from me, since I would never willingly give it to anyone.

It was true though. Of all my efforts to ignore him, Raoul had taken my acceptance and I had had no power to take it back.

Past the point
of no return -
no backward glances:
the games we've played
till now are at
an end ...
Past all thought
of "if" or "when" -
no use resisting:
abandon thought,
and let the dream
descend ...

This night was the point of no return.

All our fates would be decided tonight, and though the meaning had changed since I first said the words, 'the games we've played till now were at an end,' they still rang true. Games. The game with Christine had ended, but this opera and this situation was all a game. It was the Comte's game, and I knew that I had to play it because he had the one prize that I wanted. I would show him though that our lives were not games. Raoul's life was not something that could be changed and torn asunder at a whim.

I would tear him down and show him how much it hurt to be played with.

I watched as Raoul fought against my words. He fought against my voice, and for the moment, I wished he were not so strong. I wished that quality I saw in him when I had seen his scars had faded just a bit. He grabbed the hilt of his sword and I could see him tense noticeably. I could almost see the white of his knuckles, or perhaps that was my imagination.

What raging fire
shall flood the soul?
What rich desire
unlocks its door?
What sweet seduction
lies before
us ...?

Raoul was fighting, and I had to implement the other portion of my plan. I turned my attention to Christine. I was loathe to do this, but I knew how the Comte would just love my next actions. I drew close to Christine pulled her against me. I allowed my hands to drift across her abdomen and grabbed her hands. She gasped in surprise. This was bold. I allowed my hands to caress her as I sang to her. This close and with the physical contact I could tell that she was affected by me still. I had not sung to her in a while, and it seemed she had been immune to me before only due to constant exposure.

I hated doing this. Touching her was nothing like touching Raoul had been. Though I had not tried, the comparison was still being made.

I looked towards my box seat and saw the Comte glaring in my direction. He was sitting tensely in his seat, but I noticed that his anger was secondary. He was too enthralled with my voice to be completely focused on his adolescent obsession with possessing things and people.

He had considered Raoul to be a pawn. I believed he was using Christine as a pawn as well. I wondered if she realized it herself; however, he had evidently told her about his personal plan when he had not told Raoul.

People were not to be treated as pawns. Once again, I knew that I was no fighter of justice. I did not care about anyone else. I only cared about myself. Okay, myself and Raoul. And I knew that if you were not careful you would always be a pawn to others. I had been a pawn. I had been the Devil's Child. I had been used for people's shock and horror. A mistreated pawn in a circus of freaks.

I had used others too. I was not free from that guilt, but I would raise hell if anyone believed that they could use either Raoul or me as pawns ever again. Not after what we had been through, not after all the remnants of our past followed us wherever we went. We were survivors, and though I had once believed that doing whatever necessary to obtain what I desired was the proper way to live, I had recently realized that when something, when someone finally came who was worth fighting for all the bad deeds in the past would come back.

I did not know if I believed in karma, but it felt as though every bad deed I had ever committed was keeping Raoul and me apart.

I glanced in his direction and I saw that Raoul had managed to step out in the line of sight of the Comte. He was stronger than I had expected. I stepped away from Christine and focused on him again. He froze and looked at me, eyes wide almost in fear.

Past the point
of no return,
the final threshold -
what warm,
unspoken secrets
will we learn?
Beyond the point
of no return ...

I sang to him and only for him. It was the last chance to make him snap out of whatever had happened to change him. I was calling out to him. I wanted him to answer. I pulled at him with my voice and I saw him almost step forward.

My part had ended though.

You have brought me
to that moment
where words run dry,
to that moment
where speech
disappears
into silence,
silence ...

Christine's voice seemed to bring him out of his stupor and I cursed my damnable luck. I did not look away from him though.

Raoul looked relieved, and I realized that I had been doing what I had wanted to avoid. I did not want to coerce Raoul into coming with me. I did not want to force him to do anything he did not want to do. It was… it was just that I did not see any other way. I did not see any other way to make him come to me.

There was one fact I knew: Raoul belonged with me (to me). Because of this one fact, this one truth, I would do anything. Although I wanted Raoul to come willingly, if he would not, then I would have to try other means.

It did not mean that I had to like my approach though.

Raoul glanced at the Comte and motioned that I was on stage. He was much too strong willed. The Comte nodded, but I noticed that his attention was elsewhere. Christine was staring at him as she sung. She was very furtive with her glances, but since I was so close, I could tell she and Philippe were looking at each other.

Once again, I took some pleasure knowing that she would be hurt by him after all this was through. It was in their nature, the one they had accepted completely.

I have come here,
hardly knowing
the reason why ...
In my mind,
I've already
imagined our
bodies entwining
defenseless and silent -
and now I am
here with you:
no second thoughts,
I've decided,
decided ...

I could see Raoul wondering what the Comte was waiting for. He should have given the signal to kill me by then. 'Shoot to kill.' Raoul did not look too pleased with the delay. Apparently, he wanted me dead really badly.

He glanced at the Comte once more and realization dawned on him. I had wondered when he would notice. The Comte was trapped in the sound of my voice, in the effect of my training with Christine. He was caught in my opera. They all were. That had always been the purpose of my music. The music was meant to act as a sort of cage for people. They needed to know what it felt like for me. They needed to know what being trapped felt like.

In that cage, I could make them feel anything I wanted. I could reach into their very minds and switch on happiness and sadness. I could make them feel pleasure beyond their wildest dreams and I could hurt them, as I had been hurt. It was the only power I really had over others besides having their lives in my hand the moment they stepped into my opera house.

Everyone was watching with avid interest, and I was surprised that Raoul had been able to break out of it. Not that surprised. The map of the scars on his body flashed before my eyes. My opinion of him had been steadily increasing.

Past the point
of no return -
no going back now:
our passion-play
has now, at last,
begun ...
Past all thought
of right or wrong -
one final question:
how long should we
two wait, before
we're one ...?

It felt wrong to sing this duet with Christine. It felt forced, and though she sang passionately, I knew that she too had begun to fight against my voice.

How would this end? I knew that once this song was over, I would have to act quickly. Christine had motioned to the Comte and he would eventually have to signal people. The guards had been moving. Some sign had been made, but not the 'shoot to kill' sign yet.

When will the blood
begin to race
the sleeping bud
burst into bloom?
When will the flames,
at last, consume
us ...?
Past the point
of no return
the final threshold -
the bridge
is crossed, so stand
and watch it burn ...
We've passed the point
of no return ...

I pulled Christine against me. I would use her as a shield if I had to, but I knew that I had to keep her close. I knew that she would run away from me, and I needed her to follow through with my plan.

They had used her as bait for me, and I would use her as bait for the Comte and Raoul.

The words of the song had ended, and it was a though time suspended. The last notes from the orchestra hung heavily in the air, and suddenly, words that I knew by heart came to mind. They were the words that had haunted me since that night. Haunted my dreams, my thoughts, my every breath. They were words that I had wanted to hear. Words that I had felt to be freedom.

I let my gaze focus on Raoul.

Say you'll share with
me one
love, one lifetime ...
Lead me, save me
from my solitude ...
Say you want me
with you,
here beside you ...
Anywhere you go
let me go too -
Christine
that's all I ask of ...

Halfway through the song, I realized I could not say Raoul's name. I could not so openly reveal that I was going through all of this for him. Quickly changing the name, I spoke Christine's name knowing that the Comte would be enraged by it.

When Christine unmasked, I was actually surprised. I had not been paying attention to her, and it did not even cross my mind that she would do something like that. I should have expected it though. She had unmasked me once before. Why would she stop at once?

The gasps and screams of horror sounded the same to my ears. People's reactions were always the same, whether it was at the circus or in the opera house. I grabbed Christine close though she tried to run away. I saw the guards taking aim, and I realized that was the signal.

I looked at her with all the hatred that had been building before glancing at Raoul. I was almost afraid of his reaction. Christine had not reacted well when she first saw my face. I wondered how well he would handle it. I expected the worst, but when I looked at him, he was not screaming or horrified. He looked at me and I could swear that it was my Raoul.

The moment passed though, and he was back to the Vicomte. I looked at him with challenge in my eyes hoping he would follow. This was all done so that he would follow me down to my home.

In a flash of light and smoke, I engaged the trap door. On my way, I cut the safety ropes to the chandelier. I could hear it tinkling unsteadily. Although the destruction of the opera house was not my primary interest, I knew that kidnapping Christine would not be enough to draw the Comte. It may have been, but I wanted to destroy some part of his life as well.

Christine screamed as we fell through the trap. We landed and I shook her roughly.

"Shut up."

She screamed even louder.

I winced, but instead of forcing her to be quiet, I decided the best plan of action for right now would be to get to the lair. I grabbed her arm and began to drag her. She was forced to follow along. I moved so quickly that she had to concentrate on keeping up instead of yelling.

I was thankful for the reprieve.

I had to think. The Comte and Raoul would not be able to find their way by themselves. Perhaps I should have spoken to Madame Giry before tonight. I knew they would find a way down. Madame Giry would think I had gone too far. Just like before when I had kidnapped Raoul, she would reveal my secrets to the Comte. I only had one more secret left and that was the way down to my home. Madame Giry would lead the way or else they would find some other way.

All I knew was that both of them would follow me.

Entering my lair, I grabbed some rope on the way. I hear her gasp and I turn to see at what she was looking. Her gaze was sweeping across the cavern. Oh, I had forgotten about how differently it looked now. The swan bed was gone, so too were her mannequin and the paintings. There were even less candles lit. I had not needed the light.

Finally realizing that I had been watching her, she screamed once more and tried to pull herself away. I held onto her wrist tighter and yanked her to me.

"Philippe will come and save me," she bravely (or stupidly) replied.

"You've had the opportunity to betray me quite a few times now," I spoke angrily at her. I towered over her small frame.

She cowered and I enjoyed the sight.

"… and you've gladly taken those opportunities, haven't you?"

She tugged at her arm replying, "I know you don't want me anymore."

I laughed, and it was a maniacal sound. I grinned maliciously, "Well, shall I give you a prize for figuring that out?"

I turned us around showing her once more how bare it was.

She glared at me. "Philippe will come."

"Oh I am planning on it," I responded, "I am rather hoping he will."

I had reached my breaking point. They had taken everything from me. They had taken Raoul.

I bound Christine's hands and tossed up the loose end on a rock protrusion overhead. Tying off the loose end I made certain Christine was uncomfortable. I pulled it high enough so that she was forced to stand on her toes. She was a ballet dancer, so I knew it would not be too uncomfortable. I considered pulling the rope up so that she could not touch the floor at all, but I did not want her to pass out from the pain if her shoulders dislocated. I wanted her to see when I left her.

I released her temporarily. She struggled and I watched to see if she could free herself. She could not get the proper leverage. I took a step back and looked at her for a moment.

She was growling and hissing at me in fury. It was quite the animalistic response. "Let me go you monster!"

"Monster? What happened to your Angel of Music," I mocked her.

I could not waste too much attention on her though. Once she was tied up, I had to worry about the Comte and Raoul. Hopefully, I would be able to convince Raoul not to attack me. Then, I could subdue the Comte, tie him and Christine to a heavy stone, and drop them into the lake never to be found again. Though that would be nice, I had to remind myself that killing them was not priority. I would subdue them both, and take Raoul. Where we will go, they will never find us.

"Let me go." She screamed in pain.

"We are waiting for our guests," I replied, "Do not be impatient."

"Let me…"

I clasped my hand over her mouth.

"Shhh! Listen."

"Christine! Christine!" The Comte came barging in through a side passageway. He had come down the stairs then. I waited a moment before wondering where Raoul was. Surely, he came down as well. I thought for certain he would. Well, even if he had not, this would make it easier. I would only have to worry about the Comte. After I was done with him, I could search for Raoul.

"Welcome, Comte," I gestured to my home, "to my humble abode."

The Comte grinned, "Opera Ghost. I appreciate the invitation."

"This is indeed an unparalleled delight. I had rather hoped you would come."

He nodded, "I had rather hoped to be here in fact. You will truly make my night."

"We have unfinished business. Do we not?" I did not like his cocky attitude. I would wipe that smirk from his face. I moved closer to Christine.

"Indeed we do." His eyes narrowed seeing me move towards her.

I allowed my hands to drift to Christine's midsection. She squirmed and tried to move away, but to no avail. Once again, my mind compared the two. It was nothing like touching Raoul, but I wanted to anger the Comte. I had already learned that he did not like others to touch things he thought were his. I purposefully let my hands linger. "Have you had our prima donna yet?"

The Comte glared at me.

"Just petting?" I laughed at him loudly. "Even I have petted her Comte. Do not tell me you have not been able to do more."

"Release her you monster." Apparently, I had hit a nerve.

He pulled his sword and lunged at me. I dodged it easily and kicked him aside.

Christine screamed, "Philippe be careful."

He glared at her momentarily before pulling out a pistol. He turned towards me angrily but I had already seen him reaching for it. In his lunge, I had seen it tucked into his belt. It was not a good sign, but before he could properly turn around, I knocked the gun away from him. He swung at me with his fist and ran towards the pistol. I pulled him away and threw him against the wall. He staggered and stood up holding his sword ready. At least he had given up on the pistol. I myself did not appreciate that weapon. It was a dishonourable way to fight. I thought that there was more skill in sword combat.

"I even believe the Vicomte was able to pet her."

Christine screamed, "That's not true."

He tried to attack me again, but he was still unsteady from hitting the wall. I easily dodged it.

"I'm certain there was a certain fan as well."

He was furious, "I will destroy you."

"As if you could," I dared.

If I knew anything, anger made for poor fighting. There were some times when anger helped, but thanks to some exaggerations, the Comte was reaching blind rage. He was looking for the kill more often than his own defense. Not only that though, he was at a disadvantage. The light was meager. He was still slightly disoriented and tripped over stones stumbling on the rocky terrain. He was in my territory.

After a series of failed swipes of the sword, he lunged at me again and this time I tripped him. He fell ungracefully to the floor, and I quickly grabbed my Punjab lasso tightening it around his neck. Kneeling on his back, I tied his arms behind his back much how a swine would be tied.

"Oh," I laughed at his struggling, "I had expected much more from you. What a shame."

I paused momentarily hearing a splash of water. Someone was crossing the lake.

"Release him!"

The voice caught my attention immediately. I quickly finished tying him up and tossed him easily to the side. I waited a moment to compose myself.

I turned around and looking at him, I knew right away what had happened to him. He had fallen into the water trap. I was glad he had survived but was even angrier with the Comte for having left him there. I had wondered how he was able to bypass the trap on that stairwell.

I eyed the Comte before turning to face Raoul again. I knew that the Comte already knew that I wanted Raoul. I wondered if he knew just how much I wanted him.

"Vicomte," I said no mocking in my tone. "I'm so glad you could make it."

He grasped the portcullis when Christine whimpered and the Comte moaned.

"Free them. Do what you like only free them!" He yelled.

I was not ready for this. I could not attack him, but he probably would not let me near him unless we were battling. I would have to subdue him without harming him. He was not making this easy on me.

He ordered, "Let me see them."

I paused for a moment wondering at the change of tone. I glanced at the two behind me. Christine was still hanging and the Comte trying and failing to loosen his ropes. I looked towards Raoul thinking this would be the perfect opportunity to capture him.

"Be my guest sir," I replied before pulling a lever. The portcullis shuddered and slowly lifted up.

He ducked under the gate and walked warily towards us. He paused a short distance away. He was being cautious. He glanced between me and the other two.

I stalked towards him, "It seems we have a full house tonight, do we not?"

"Free them," he stated calmly.

"A lot has happened," I continued as though he had not said anything. Just a little closer and I would be able to reach the rope beneath the surface of the water. I had to time this correctly, "I could free them, but," I slowly bent down and reached into the water. The noise of the portcullis dropping behind him caused Raoul to turn around. The moment he did, I grabbed the rope and threw it around his neck. I did not plan to choke him, but it was a start. He threw up his hand quickly and the lasso fell around his shoulders. Even better, I thought. He had quick reflexes. I tied him up quickly. I used all my strength to overpower him. The sooner he was tied up, the sooner I would be able to convince him to stop trying to kill me. I could appreciate the feel of his body against mine later. "Why would I want to free them when I could just capture you all?"

I wrapped the rope around his arms and torso and threw him against the portcullis. He was struggling rather valiantly. I had not realized he was that strong. He struggled harder causing our bodies to collide against each other repeatedly, and I thought I was going to go mad. I held onto him tighter. I was mindful of the scars though. I tried to avoid them the best I could, but he was moving so much. I was certain I had accidentally bumped a few of his wounds.

"Release me!" He screamed. With him so close, I did not even consider that to be an option. I had released him too many times before. I would not make the same mistake again.

I whispered hoarsely, "Never," in his ear and he suddenly stopped struggling. He looked surprised.

I looked behind me to check on the other two and saw that they were free from their bonds. I screamed, "You wretched woman you!"

Christine was in the Comte's arms. There was no way that the Comte could have freed himself from his bonds, so that meant that Christine had been faking pain. She had gotten out of her ropes and proceeded to free the Comte. I wanted to physically harm her, very painfully. I stalked towards them with half a mind to do just that, but the Comte held up his hands in supplication.

"Perhaps we should make a deal."

I paused. What deal could the Comte make that would interest me at all. I asked warily, "What deal?"

"Free us," he motioned to himself and Christine, "and do what you like with him," he pointed to Raoul. I glared at him and saw Raoul doing the same. "We will never return."

I already had Raoul. Why did the Comte think he could bargain with him? I realized what I was doing again. I was putting Raoul second. I was letting my anger get the better of me. All I had wanted when the plan started was to get Raoul. I did not care what happened to the Comte or Christine as long as they were out of the way. This was what he was offering. I did not think I could believe them when they said they would never return, but I just needed a few minutes before I would be gone with Raoul in tow forever.

I glanced at Raoul. He was worth the risk.

"Go and never return," I said plainly pointing to a passageway. I watched them as they left. Waiting a few moments, I made certain they were not returning.

Turning to Raoul, I smiled. I could not help it. We were finally alone, and I was no longer at war with myself. I wanted him and I was going to take him. This was my chance.

"Raoul," I called to him relieved that it was all over. The Comte and Christine were gone. The plan had worked.

I looked at him and realized the plan was not over. This ordeal was not through. Raoul was not Raoul. He was the Vicomte. He was still the man who wanted to kill me. All my energy seemed to dissipate. So close, yet so far. I was so tired of this struggle. I was so tired of fighting with him. I walked to his side and raised my hand to touch him. He tensed at the contact, but it was not as though there was something he could do to stop me. I rested the palm of my hand on his cheek and knew that I would do everything I could to fight for him. I sighed at the contact.

I dropped my head beside his leaning against the portcullis. I would do anything and everything. I had reached this part of the plan, but I had not actually thought of the specifics of returning my Raoul to himself. "I don't know what to do."

I gently stroked his cheek with my thumb almost losing myself to the feeling of being able to touch him once more. My fingers brushed a part of his hair, and I remembered I could not enjoy this. I still had to do something about his desire to kill me.

There was only one thing left to do. I sighed and forced myself away from him.

"You still want to kill me," I stated more as a fact than a question.

He nodded his head hesitantly.

I nodded my head too. Of course, he wanted to kill me. I left his side and searched around for my sword. I would have to fight him. We would let fate decide. Fate had decided many things for me already. Why not this too? Finding my sword, I returned and steadied my mind. I would not harm him, but I could not deny Raoul what he wanted. I could never deny him. I swung in an easy arc cutting the ropes from him. He had closed his eyes certain that I was going to kill him.

As the ropes fell into the water, he opened his eyes in confusion.

I met his gaze evenly and with more than a little bit of sadness said, "Let us see how cruel fate can be. Come."

He pulled his sword out of its sheath quickly. Apparently, he did not think I would be benevolent for very much longer. I wanted to yell in frustration. Did he have to look so damn excited when he was going to try to kill me? He stood confidently before quickly lunging to my right side. I could only assume he thought it would be my weaker side since that was the last place he had attacked me last time as well. The wound had healed well enough.

I parried his lunge and stepped away. He was quick, but in the water, it was easy to anticipate his attacks.

He swung towards my head then torso in quick succession, but I easily blocked it. He finally realized that the water was not making it any easier for him. He maneuvered his way onto the dry land.

He was so focused on killing me. I did not know how to react.

I decided to try to speak with him, talk some sense into him somehow. "Raoul."

He ignored my call. He was concentrating, which basically involved him glaring angrily at me. I held my sword ready for the next round of attacks. Perhaps there was another way to go about this. He lunged and swung viciously at me. I managed to stay just outside of his reach and what was close, I blocked. He was getting frustrated that he could not hit me. There was another way. The Comte had lost his concentration when I angered him. I would just have to anger Raoul, and if in the process, I could remind him who he really was, then that was just a bonus.

"Are you truly that weak?"

That caught his attention.

"Weak?" He scoffed.

I kept my tone neutral. I did not want him to think I was just mocking him. I wanted him to know that by allowing himself to be this way, he was being weak. He was losing the battle I thought he had already fought and won. He had not turned out badly as I had. He had somehow survived.

Raoul looked confused. He was not ready to talk to me just yet.

I continued, "Were you so weak to give up that easily?"

He angrily charged me. He swiped at every body part he could: arm, leg, torso. Repeat. Arm, leg, head. Every time he attacked, I dodged. Every time I dodged, he plunged forward. Every time I parried, he attacked a different body part. He could hit nothing though. It was easier to defend, and Raoul was getting frustrated and therefore sloppy.

"How could you let Philippe win?" I knew I was gaining purchase.

He glared at me again. "What are you talking about?" He swung his sword down towards my head. I blocked it, and though he tried to force my sword down I held firm.

"You're just like him."

He faltered. I could see that some part of him remembered thinking that was bad. It was the part I was trying to reach. "Good," he gritted out. He pulled back.

"No," I tried to convince him, "you didn't want to be like him."

Raoul finally screamed in frustration before attacking me again. I sidestepped a lunge and grabbed his arm. Stepping behind him, I grabbed him in a bear hug effectively immobilizing his arms. He wiggled but I was not going to let him go. I could finally talk some sense into him. I could finally make him see what was happening to him. Though I did not want to do it, I had to remind him how evil the Comte really was.

He stopped struggling and responded, "How would you know that?"

"I just do," I replied. He struggled more.

"Let me go," he begged. I could tell his barriers were falling.

I hugged him tighter and mentally apologized to him. I did not know if this would work, but if he responded so adversely to pressure being put on the scars on his back before, I could hope that whatever memory it triggered would remind him how much the Comte was malicious. I could hope that it reminded him of what that man had put him through. There was nothing of the Comte's that Raoul should want to emulate.

I felt more than heard him gasp in pain. His body tensed in my grasp and I loosed my hold on him. He was breathing heavily and I wondered if he was going to have another attack like before. The sword fell from his hands and his legs buckled. I tried to carry his weight, but I was slow to react. I lost my balance and had to release him to break our fall.

I landed on the floor uncomfortably trying to avoid landing on Raoul. He skidded away from me. I slowly stood up thinking that it was over; that Raoul had dropped his sword because he remembered the pain the Comte had put him through. I thought that his scars had somehow saved us, but when I looked at him. He was lying perfectly still, yet his body was completely tense.

He clenched his eyes shut, and I could tell he was in pain. I just did not know why. He was lying on his side. There was no more pressure on his back. Did he hurt himself when we fell?

"Raoul," I spoke softly trying not to scare him, "what's wrong?"

He ignored me, but he looked so afraid. It appeared that he did not understand what was happening either.

I knelt beside him and checked to see if there was any blood. There wasn't. I was about to panic. What was I supposed to do? I did not know what was wrong with him. I was just about to yell at myself for my stupidity when Raoul spoke.

"Hurts." He had struggled to get that one word out. It did not help very much since I could tell that he was in pain, but at least I knew he was still with me.

I looked up quickly thinking that I had heard a noise. It must have been my imagination.

I heard Raoul take a deep breath in and hold it. I looked around for something that might help me.

"You aren't," he began suddenly and painfully, "going to kill me now, are you?"

I looked down at him surprised. I could feel my lips upturning slightly before I scoffed just as I had before. I placed a hand on his forehead, just because I could and replied, "Does it look like I'm going to kill you?"

"Should," he gasped as the pain and I tensed up. Maybe he should not be talking, "Should I know what that's supposed to look like?"

He grinned up at me then and it felt like we had gone back in time. There were a million things wrong with having this conversation right now. He was supposed to be trying to kill me. I was supposed to be finding a way to make him remember himself. He was not supposed to be in excruciating pain. I really did not know why we were saying these things. But of all the things he had done since our last meeting, this was the only thing that felt so right, felt familiar. It was the only thing that made me really believed that I could turn him.

"You'll know," I responded.

And suddenly Raoul relaxed. He took a deep breath and pushed himself away from me. I looked at me warily. It may have felt familiar, but this was still the Vicomte. I had a new resolve though. I just knew fate would be on my side this time.

Standing up, I grabbed both our swords and offered him his. He forced himself to stand. I could just picture him in my shirt, standing on legs that were too weak. He had been willful then, and was willful now. A barrage of memories seemed to attack me. This would work. We would fight some more and Raoul would somehow come back to himself.

"Shall we continue?" I asked. This had to work.

He tentatively grabbed his sword. He stood there with the sword tip pointed downward just thinking. He looked conflicted. That was a good sign.

He looked up at me and unexpectedly asked, "You've been doing all of this for me?"

The answer to that was obvious. Why would I trade both the Comte and Christine for him? I wanted him. I nodded and answered, "Of course."

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. Maybe I had not made my intentions clear. After all I had gone through for him though, how could he not see it? "Why?" he asked.

I considered the question for a moment. I could not say because I love you, because I find myself drawn to you. That would only frighten him away. He had not even realized I had gone through all of this because of him. I could not just say those things. He looked at me expectantly. "Because," I knew exactly how to answer that conveyed everything I wanted him to know, "you told me to stay."

He stepped closer to me letting his sword drop to the ground. Was that all I needed to say? Raoul looked a little confused still as though it took so much effort to find that memory. I could easily conjure up the moment when he told me to stay. I could hope this was it, couldn't I?

As he got closer, he looked at me as though for the first time and said, "Erik?"

He said my name. It was as though all of my doubts had been assuaged. He had not called me OG or Phantom. He had called me by my name. I dropped my sword and was about to go to him when a sharp pain spiked in my head. I fought to keep my balance, but my vision was suddenly blacking out. I felt myself falling forward onto Raoul. I breathed in his scent before I was placed onto the floor.

It was so hard to stay awake. I could hear voices, but they sounded so far away. I tried to focus, but I could not. I managed to find Raoul, and before my vision failed me completely and I lost consciousness, I wondered why Raoul was holding the pistol.

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End ch22

word count: 13,316

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A/N: Don't forget to R/R (Read and Review)!

Chapter review: Ahh!

Let's see, nothing happened here that you didn't see in the previous chapter. Oh, except for the Comte and the Christine part. All I can say is that I can't wait for the next chapter (I almost don't want to proofread this because of that excitement, but I guess I'll have to).