A/N: Number four, up and at it!

xxxxxx

When You Lose Your Way

Worn Your Welcome

xxxxxx

Okay, so I wasn't completely right about the pregnancy... I was completely wrong. Hermione Granger, pregnant? I think so. The thought was enough to make me want to crawl inside a hole and just die there, even if that next door hole was Malfoy. I couldn't believe him. To have the nerve to force me into a clinical appointment and then rub the pregnany in my face... well, not really. But still... any reason to hate Malfoy, I would take.

Morning was hard to get through... him and his smug face... I would love nothing more than to just cut off his pretty little hair, or rip up his expensive robes. I wouldn't mind hitting him smack dab on the cheek like I did in third year, but I suppose he would actually report me for that. But then again when did I care?

" - so tonight, and hopefully we'll be finished."

I snapped my head up from my breakfast. There wasn't much point going to the Great Hall for breakfast when we had our very own kitchen in our dorm. I appreciated this advantage more than ever, for no one would see my change in eating habits.

"What?" I asked indifferently.

"I was talking about our rounds tonight. If we start earlier than usual you won't have to be up so late and you could get some rest. I'll take the rest of your shift and manage the remainder of the night myself. Is that okay?"

I couldn't care less at the moment, so I just nodded, not bothering to show my thanks.

"Sure, thanks a lot Malfoy. Ah, Granger, no problem, it was my pleasure," I heard him mutter, first with a high voice, and the second sentence in his deep, mocking voice.

"I'm sorry?" I asked testily.

Draco smiled at me fakely and shrugged.

"Nothing," and he moved away from me, taking a seat on our couch, staring aimlessly around the dorm. I arched my eyebrow, thinking he was waiting for something. Well, he wouldn't be getting anything I figured, so I picked up my bag and made my way to the door, seeing as class would be starting very soon, and I was already late on my schedule.

"You're welcome, by the way," he said loudly from his seat. I smiled with my forehead cringed together.

"So that was what you were waiting for? My thank you?"

"Well, you know, I've been such a nice guy, considering I could be telling the school and making your life a living hell, but you don't seem to take any of that into notice."

"And I shouldn't. Besides, I never asked you to keep this a secret or help me, did I?"

"Is this when I apologize for trying to help you out?"

"No, this is when you finally listen to me when I tell you to leave me alone and butt out. We've gone through this, have we not?" He stayed silent, so I continued. "You set up an appointment for me, and I thanked you for that - "

He scoffed, "Barely." I ignored him.

"And that is the only thing I will accept from you from here on after. Have I given you any reason to feel responsibility towards me?"

"Yes."

I was surprised.

"Like what?" I challenged.

"For one, I was the only person you told."

"I never told you anything - !"

"You showed me the test, Granger."

I sighed. He made a point there.

"And now I feel that since I'm the only person who knows about it, I should... take care of you somehow, or make sure you're okay, until you're ready to tell someone more... reasonable."

"Reasonable?" I questioned.

"I really shouldn't have been the first person you told," he explained. "Your parents or your friends, you should've told... just not me."

I sighed.

"I had every reason to tell you."

He looked at me, puzzled, and scratched his head.

"Like?"

Woops.

"I..." He stared at me. "Well, you...it's just... kind of... " I should have said something by now, huh? Bugger. "It's just... well, to be honest - "

Riiiing!

Saved by the bell. Huh, I never knew I'd get the chance to say that in real life, ever.

"Crap," Malfoy said, glancing at his watch. "We're late."

I looked over at the clock above the fire, and panicked.

"And I have potions first thing!" What a bad start to the day.

Malfoy walked past me and held the common room door open while picking up his bag with one hand.

"Rounds tonight at ten o'clock, Granger." And he was out the door like that, not even pushing the matter further. I was very glad of that.

Figuring that I was already late, I would at least finish up my breakfast. I was pretty hungry still. Maybe ten more minutes, and then I would leave. I was just glad Malfoy left before I did, and without questioning me further.

With great relief, I plonked myself onto a stool.

I doubt anything else could save me from something like that again.

xxxxxx

I should have let Malfoy have my shift completely, tonight. I was utterly and completely tired after the first ten minutes of rounds. I didn't like patrolling the school at night because it was scary (yes, I know I'm a witch for goodness sake), and I had an hour alone with Malfoy. This fact I absolutely hated the most. I looked forward to another session of question and answer with Malfoy. Not.

"How many more minutes?" I said, while stifling a yawn.

Malfoy glanced at his watch as he brought his hands down from rubbing his eyes.

"Fourty-eight," he said, almost apologetically towards me. I guess he knew I was tired.

"Oh for Merlin's sake," I whispered in the dark.

"Tired?" He asked me.

"Not at all," I lied.

"You're bad at lying, Granger."

I gave him a sarcastic look.

"It's not that I'm bad at lying. You're just very... perceptive."

"No. You're bad at lying, and very easy to read."

I glared at him.

"I'm not easy to read, thanks."

"Yes you are," he contradicted. I could almost tell he was trying to keep from contradicting me any further.

"Oh yeah? How so." I supposed that if I let him elaborate, he'd shut up for the rest of the night.

"Well, for example, if I didn't know that you were pregnant, I would have realized you're eating habits right now, and the fact that you were vomiting in the bathroom every other day. Plus, you've got bags in your eyes from lack of sleep, and just the way you act would have given me the hint that you were."

I went rigid as a board.

His smug faultered when he saw this.

"Oh... I didn't mean to talk about the pregnancy." I tried very had not to flinch at that word.

I ignored his somewhat apology and went stoney. "Well, I'm not the only one with bags under my eyes," I told him, while starting to stroll our current area of supervision.

"What do you mean?" he asked me sharply. Ah, crap. I didn't mean to get him riled.

"Well, you wake up in the morning like you've got a wand up your butt. Plus, I hear you get up at night and go to the bathroom to splash some water on your face. Looks like I'm not the only one with lack of sleep, right?"

He eyed me suspiciously. "What else do you hear at night?"

I shrugged. How was I supposed to know?

"You snoring," I added, trying to make the sudden turn of the conversation go back to the normal arguing.

He straightened up.

"I don't snore."

I smiled. "If that helps you sleep at night."

He peered at me again, and looked serious once more. Oh honestly, could I have said anything more to stay on topic? He looked really uncomfortable now, as if he really did have trouble sleeping because of something.

"What?" I asked peevishly.

"Nothing," he said dismissively.

"No, seriously. What's keeping you up at night?" I asked him with what I thought was concern. "Me and the pregnancy... - " insert my flinch here, "it's not bothering you is it?"

He scoffed. Wow, thanks, Malfoy.

"No, that's not it."

"Then what?"

"It's just..." now he really looked uncomfortable. "I keep having these dreams."

My ears perked in interest.

"Dreams? What about?"

"I don't know," he said, with a hint of frustration in his voice, "I'm walking up to this familiar door, stumbling and everything on my way, yelling Pansy's name. I get the feeling that someone's in trouble, but I keep on yelling like a maniac, and tripping and falling... That's as far as I get, before I wake up."

Well... that's interesting.

"What is this? A nightmare?" I asked in plain worry.

"No, it can't be. But it feels so much like one."

I was at a loss for words. He couldn't be dreaming about what I thought he was dreaming about, could he?

"Have you... gotten any further into the dream?"

He scratched his head in frustration. "I get closer to the door with each dream. But I never have enough to see what's behind it!"

I think this was my cue to leave. I didn't want in on any of his drama when I had more than enough of my own.

"I think I'm feeling out of it," I said, faking faintness.

"Feel like going back to the common room?" He asked, although it didn't sound like concern. He was still frustrated about the dream.

"Yeah. You don't mind taking the rest of my shift?"

"It's fine. I could use the time alone to sort this dream out anyways."

"Okay. I'll see you up there."

"Yeah, okay." He still sounded distracted.

I began walking my way up to the common room alone, thinking. Well, those few minutes weren't so bad. Malfoy was actually almost nice and I could stand him being next to me for more than ten seconds. But that didn't excuse the fact that I hated him with every breath in me. He was still Malfoy.

I stumbled my way to my bedroom door, and turned on the lamp. I would sit here and think, for a while, about what I was going to do about... the thing. Whether it was a bean or a baby, I couldn't admit, but sitting here, making myself believe it, would probably help me come to terms with it, I supposed.

The worst thing I could do was abort the baby. I'm not a murderer, and I never will be... but it may help my future stay in track. But I could also have the child, and give it up. Or I could have the baby and keep it... but that was impossible. I couldn't have it and keep it. I have a career to follow and an education to finish. I couldn't do any of that while carrying a baby in my arms.

I was dealing with the pros and cons in each choice I had, when I realized I had fallen asleep. Or not. Maybe I had been thinking for too long. I was on my side, my head facing the digital clock on my bedside table. It was 11:30. So I had fallen asleep.

I turned around to my other side to turn the lamp off. I probably wouldn't be able to go back to bed now. And just as I reached out to flick the light off, I heard gasping from next door. I shot up in bed, and looked instinctively to the wall seperating me from Malfoy's room. I forgot that he was probably home by now.

I crept out of my bed, and turned the knob on my door slowly. I looked to my right, towards Malfoy's room, to see if there had been any disruption of some sort. Through the slit at the bottom of the door, I could see he had turned a light on, and that he was stirring.

Spying on him was a temption option at the moment, but I didn't really feel like it, as I was so hungry suddenly. I didn't know if it was just me, or the... pregnancy acting up, but I felt like eating a feast. I shut my door and walked over to the kitchen.

I opened the fridge, to find that we were well in stock. I took out a bag of bread, vegetables, a generous amount of ham and a plate of cheese. My feast would be my very own giant sandwich.

Soon, my sandwich was made, and I was eating it like I hadn't eaten in years. I could probably empty our whole kitchen, from the way I was still so hungry and almost finished my sandwhich. While thinking of making myself another "feast," I heard footsteps coming my way. I gulped quickly and dropped my sandwich.

"Late night dinner, Granger?"

I sighed. It was Malfoy. And he was looking pretty normal.

"I... uh..." I looked down at my large sandwich, "I was really hungry," I fessed.

He nodded. "Me too, sort of."

I pushed him the bag of bread as he took a seat across from me, and began putting away my sandwich.

"You don't have to leave, you know. I'm only going to be here for a while, seeing as I'm not that hungry." And it was true. He took out two slices of bread and slathered a layer of mayonnaise over one of them. He slapped the other slice onto it, and took a bite. Seeing that made me feel like a pig.

"Okay," I said, picking up my sandwich again. I made sure not to eat sloppy. "So... are you sure you're just hungry or not trying to distract yourself from going to sleep again?"

He snapped his head up, and put his sandwich down.

"Why?" Malfoy asked.

"It's just..." I twiddled with my fingers, after wiping them on a napkin. "I heard you waking up like you were drowning in a pool a few minutes ago."

He nodded grimly.

"The dream again?"

Another grim nod.

"Was it bad?"

Grim nod again.

"Did you get further?"

Insert a million more grim nods here.

I leaned in closer to the counter. He was looking really pale. More paler than me, and I was the one that was pregnant and hiding it from everybody.

"Well... what happened?" I asked.

He ignored the question and chewed slowly on his sandwich.

"What did you mean, it was my fault?" he suddenly questioned.

I went rigid, but quickly recovered.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know," he said with hesitation, "you just... seem to blame a lot of your pregnancy on me."

Why the heck shouldn't I?

"I'm pregnant, Malfoy. I have mood-swings."

"Yeah," he said, sounding defeated and tired.

I veered the subject to a different direction.

"So, this new class, huh? 'A Beginner Medical Wizards Basic Introduction to Doctoring.' Pretty cool huh?"

"Yeah," Malfoy said, seeming to take the bait. "That's what you want to be right? A medi-wizard?"

I nodded vigorously. It's what I've always wanted to be.

"Yeah. I love using my knowledge to help people."

"I know. I see you volunteering for credit with Madame Pomphrey sometimes."

"Yeah," I said wistfully. I would love nothing more in this world to pursue that dream.

"...How are you going to become a medi-wizard now, Granger?" he asked me, while I was in my dreamland. I snapped quickly out of it.

"There's no reason why I couldn't still be a medi-wizard, Malfoy," I said, somewhat angrily.

"Well, you're pregnant, Granger." He saw me flinch. "And you're going to have to deal with the consequences of being irresponsible."

I glared.

"Me? This coming from you, who's done nothing in his spare time but sleep with every girl in Hogwarts?"

"That's not true!" He contradicted. I stuck my head out further from my neck.

"I sleep next door to you, Malfoy. I don't just hear you snore at night," I reminded with disgust in my voice. He glared at me this time.

"Okay, so I like to have a little fun. At least none of the girls I've slept with have gotten pregnant!"

I scoffed. "You never know, Malfoy, there might be a baby Jr. Draco out there, waddling his feet. It's not like you limit your choice of who to sleep with within the school, anyways."

He stood up from his seat angrily, as if to object, and as if it were a reflex, so did I, expect I reclined so that my back was to the fridge. Usually, with this action, I would have gotten an, "I won't hurt you or your baby," speech but it wasn't what I was afraid of. He chose to narrow his eyes at me instead, although he definitely noticed my lame defensive move.

"Being pregnant suits you, Granger. Now those mood-swings come with a reason."

"Well, being a pure-blooded son of a witch suits you too, Malfoy. I hear they're selling a new line of 'Asswipe' in clothing stores by the way, you should check it out some time." He took a step towards me.

My bravery was wearing very thin.

"I feel sorry for the father of that baby."

I bit my lip. "So do I."

He was inches away from me. I could see his chest heaving with anger, and his eyes weakening from the fight. I was almost sure he was going to do something to me to make me hate him even more, but instead, he sighed, and backed away, tripping against a stool. He steadied himself and sat on it.

"This is so stupid," he muttered, while rubbing his forehead.

He got that right.

"Wow. Has hell freezen over? Did Malfoy just back out of a fight?"

He shook his head. "I'm not about to hit a pregnant woman," he said defeatedly. Well, at least he had some common sense in him.

I nodded, and took up my seat again. We both sat there, looking away from each other, feeling the awkwardness. To keep him calm, I decided I would occupy myself with washing the dishes. It would be best if I wasn't near him.

As I dumped my sandwich in the bin (for I had lost my appetite) and put away the food in the fridge, I paused. Malfoy was staring at me.

"What?" I ventured to ask.

He arched an eyebrow.

"You know, you never said who the father of your baby was."

I tried not to make my shiver go noticed so I shrugged to hide it.

"Yes, I know."

He looked at me expectantly.

"Well then, who's the father?"

I put the dishes in the sink and turned around.

"You don't want to know," I said truthfully.

"Then why am I asking?" he challenged. I sighed.

"Let's just say he's out of the picture."

"I see."

Malfoy stood up and pushed away his plate. I took it, and rinsed it quickly under the sink. I watched him go back to his room.

"Hey," I yelled to him, "you never told me how much further you went into that dream of yours."

He turned around and shrugged. "I reached the door."

"And?" I asked, with anticipation.

"It swung open."

My eyes went oval, half in surprise and half in worry. Oh bugger.

"And who did you see was behind the door...?"

"Someone."

"Who?"

He shrugged. "It was you."

-

-

-

To be continued...

A/N: Hermione behind the door? Why would she ever be behind that door? Hmm... well, Draco's not completely out of the bushes with those dreams, and Hermione isn't even close to being out of the bushes! Review if you hate it or live it please! x