Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters associated with the film "Titanic". The only thing I do own is the plot.

Chapter Five

Rose did not know what had come over her this morning. She had convinced herself to leave her bedroom and after a few hours of trying to, she had finally succeeded. Not having eaten the breakfast that Cal had sent up to her, she had made her way down the stairs, intent on making herself something to eat. For some unknown reason she had been drawn to the dining room. Curious, she had walked into the room, only to find Cal sitting alone at the long mahogany table, staring at nothing in particular. He seemed to be deep in thought, and having never seen him this way, she had stood there and watched him. He looked so different, almost serene. The frown that had been a constant on his face for quite some time had disappeared and she had to admit that he looked much better without it. Of course, it was not as if Cal wasn't attractive. He was a very handsome man and she was sure that had she been any other girl, she would have fawned over him just like all the other women did. But this air of calamity surrounding him had shocked her and she could not help but stare at him. She had hoped that he would not notice her, but he quickly did and she had stood frozen with fear.

Should she have a reason to be afraid of him? He had planned to kill her and Jack the night of the sinking. But was he dangerous now? He didn't look as intimidating as he once did. If fact, he looked very inviting. Deciding that he would not cause her harm, she had sat down at the table. He went to push in her chair and she had stopped him before he even had a chance to touch her chair. Her annoyance with him returned and she snapped at him. Didn't he understand that she wasn't a child? Couldn't he see that she could do things on her own? That she did not need a man to take care of her?

Her harsh feelings quickly vanished when she saw the look of hurt that crossed his face. He had only been trying to help her, she reasoned with herself. They sat in the sunlit room, an awkward silence staining the bright walls. The sunlight seemed to melt away, leaving them in a black abyss of stillness. She recalled another time in her life when she had been swallowed into the darkness. The time she had spent in the water after the Titanic had been engulfed into the freezing sea were the worst moments of her life. It never seemed to leave her. The more she tried to forget, the more it stayed constant in her mind. Would she ever be free of the past?

Jack had popped into her head, instantly warming her heart. The sunlight seemed to creep back into the room and she was no longer troubled. Cal sat near her, trying not to look at her. She gazed at him then. He must have felt it, for he lifted his head a few seconds later and caught her eyes. Her green eyes pierced into his brown and she heard him suck in his breath. She couldn't take the silence any longer and suggested they have a cup of tea. Her words had caused him to smile, which was a sight she had not seen in a very long time.

Now here they were, sipping tea and talking about things that weren't important. She had the urge to pinch herself to make sure that she wasn't dreaming. Were they actually having a civil conversation? Well, not a conversation really, but it was the longest they had spoken in months. It was foreign to her, but she did not sever the connection. If they were to ever move on, this would have to stay alive.

She smiled as she sipped her tea. His voice was just as charming as it had always been, and she found herself thinking about moments in their past. He had been there for her after grandmother had died. He had comforted her, his voice soothing her tears. She had been so grateful to have someone that understood. Cal had told her about his mother dying when he was just a boy and it had helped. They had kissed that day. It had been her first kiss, but she was sure it hadn't been his. He had caressed her face, causing her blush to grow. His eyes had looked right into hers and he had told her that she may not have been his first kiss, but she would be his last. His declaration had warmed her heart. That had been the first moment she had felt something for him. After that, she had let herself entertain the thought of being Mrs. Caledon Hockley. She had seen his heart in his stare and she felt that maybe, just maybe, things wouldn't be as horrible as she had once believed.

Her feelings had stopped a day later. She had heard him laughing with a friend. They had been having a conversation about her, and she hid behind the door, listening as Cal spoke of their impending marriage sealing his spot as head of Hockley Steal. She could not bare to hear anymore and had run away, tears falling freely from her eyes.

After that day, she had been determined to get away from him. She was rude and cold toward him. She did not accept his gifts. She did not speak to him. He had grown angry with her and bruised her arm after grabbing her roughly during a heated argument. He had apologized afterward, promising her it would never happen again.

He had lied. She had not forgotten how he had struck her face on the Titanic. She had not forgotten the names he had called her.

But was it worth it? Was the grudge she was holding worth anything now? They had been given a second chance. Fifteen hundred souls had been lost in the sea, but they had been given second chances. Did God have a plan for her? Was she destined to marry Cal? Had she always been destined to be with him? Jack had given her so much. He had taught her so much. Could she just forget it all now and be with Cal?

No.

No!

It wasn't possible. She had tasted freedom and she wasn't about to give it up. If Cal wanted her, he would have to accept who she was now. She would never again be the weak little girl dressed in pretty gowns and covered in jewels. She knew more now. She wasn't a little girl anymore. She was a woman. She was a woman who would not take orders from a man. She would not allow herself to be chained to the ground. She could never let it happen again.

She had promised Jack that she would go on. She had promised him that she would fall in love and have babies. She knew that it was what she wanted, but was Cal the man she would grow old with?

She shook her head and a few of her curls were let loose. Cal moved closer to her and softly lifted his hand to her forehead. She did not move. She did not push him away. His hand softly pushed the curls back. The gentleness of his touch caused goose pimples to appear on her pale skin.

Had he noticed?

She wasn't sure, but what she did know was that the image of his smile had been burned into her mind and she would never forget it.