"Behind Closed Doors" By Meg
I don't own Harry Potter…I simply enjoy using the characters conjured up J.K. Rowling for my own sweet pleasure.
Pairing: Hermione/Ron and Hermione/Mystery man (okay, the cat's out of the bag. It's Remus.)
A/N: I usually write chapters to songs, and I feel that listening to the song helps to better feel the flow that the song has established, so...from now on, I will list the song below.
Song:"Creep" by Radiohead, "Dancing" by Elisa, "Fake Plastic Trees" by Radiohead "Brighter Discontent" by The Submarines.
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The silence lasted only a moment. It lasted only long enough for Remus to close his eyes and reopen them. One breath, that was all Remus could manage. The noise in his mind was deafening. Hermione had cheated on Ron so many times. Why should he suppose this was any different? She seemed to be eternally bored with her life. She needed outside entertainment. Apparently, the best entertainment comes in the form of disposable men. Draco? Harry? Viktor?
"Why am I any different?" He asked aloud, back to his lover.
"Remus..." Hermione whispered. She took a deep breath and took an idle brush at her eyes. Her crying had stopped immediately when the front door had slammed shut. "What did you say, Remus?"
"Never mind, Hermione..." Remus shook his head. He'd made up his mind.
"What did you say, Remus?" She asked, wiping the remainder of her tears from her eyes. She seemed to be able to turn off all emotion at will. Was she truly upset about Ron leaving? Was it what she'd wanted all along?
He acted quickly. Without warning, Remus grabbed Hermione's shoulder and turned her to him. Sliding his hand down the slender length of her arm, he pulled her to him until their lips were close enough to brush.
His eyes burned when their lips touched. The moisture of her lips clung to his and their pink lips refused to part. He nestled his hand at the base of her skull, fingers intertwined into the curly mass of her hair. With a single breath, she pulled back, mouth coming free from his hungry lips. She moaned as he kissed her chin, the underside of her jaw and the smooth line of her neck. Nibbling, he set his teeth into the crook of her and took a slow, hard bite.
"Remus!" Hermione stifled a yelp as a tingly half-pain, half-pleasure seared up the nerves of her neck.
Remus trailed his fingers down her neck and chest, brushing on the tender skin of her collarbone and grazing the taught fabric separating his fingers from her supple breasts. His thumbs found the edge of her shirt as he palmed her hipbones, mouth lavishing rough kisses on the skin of Hermione's shoulder. Her skin was hot beneath his lips, nearly feverish. Remus wanted to remember this time with Hermione forever, because he knew this time would be the last.
Remus wanted to remember the way Hermione smelled, spicy yet honey sweet. He wanted to memorize the feeling of her curly hairs as they passed through the spaces between his fingers. The look of her dewy eyelashes and flushed cheeks. The sweet rosy pink of her soft lips and pert nipples. He wanted to remember the way she breathed and those moments when she held her breath.
He hooked his thumbs under the thin layer of fabric and began working it up her body. His mouth broke contact from the heat of her skin only long enough to drag the blouse over her body and head. Suckling again, he held her to him, body flush with his own. He wondered if she knew that this was the last time he'd touch her like this. Her fingers drew small circles on the fabric of his shirt, much the same way she had done to Ron's chest earlier. Her touch on his back nearly brought tears to his eyes. Remus loved Hermione, much more than he should. He loved her despite all that she had done, the things he knew of and the things he did not. He loved her for her flaws, not despite them. But, Remus also wanted to be loved in return. He knew Hermione was incapable of returning the feelings he had for her.
"I know better." He whispered to himself, voice barely above a whisper. "But I need this. I need one more moment with her."
Hermione, reaching down, cradled his head in her small hands. Their eyes met and he knew he had made the right decision. Her eyes held no love for him; they reflected only lust and possession. He forced himself to look away. It hurt him to look at her and finally see what he'd missed all these years. His denial had been all-consuming, had intoxicated him into a sense of false happiness. But, the spell had broken. Hermione's spell over Remus had finally worn off and he could see clearly now what was once clouded by desire. He'd built Hermione up into a goddess over the years of separation.
Hermione kissed Remus's lips softly, fingers roughing his beard. Her fingers trailed down his torso and she rest her palm on his chest for a moment. His heart was calm as she unfastened the buttons of his shirt, as she tugged open the worn blue dress shirt. Not making a move, he let her pull the shirt from his shoulders and let it drop to the floor of her den. Remus wondered, sourly, in the back of his mind if killing Hermione would hurt less than leaving. He could barely think the idea, and knew in no way would he be able to harm her, now or ever. He was used to the pain of not having Hermione. This pain would probably burn forever, but Remus carried many burdens. This would only be another weight to bear.
With deft fingers, Remus undid the clasp of her bra. He held one soft breast in his hand as he kissed her again, this time with renewed passion. His tongue sought to memorize her taste as he delved into her open mouth. Hermione's back arched, bringing her breasts to Remus's chest. He could feel the soft brush of her hard nipples against his body and found himself more anxious to be inside Hermione one last time. He could admit, even without love, he and Hermione had indisputable chemistry. This would surely be the bane of his existence for the remainder of his days. Strong hands grabbing her just under her rear, Remus lifted Hermione and cradled her in his arms.
"Where are we going?" Hermione asked, voice husky from lust.
Remus didn't answer her. If he opened his mouth to speak, Remus was afraid that all the things he wanted to say would come pouring our. He couldn't let his emotions take hold of him like that ever again. He wouldn't have it. He carried her, not feeling her weight, up the stairs to her bed. He knew it was the marriage bed that Ron and Hermione had shared for seven years. He knew that Ron certainly wasn't the only man that Hermione had brought into that bed.
Once up the stairs, Remus held tightly onto Hermione as he crossed the threshold of their door. In the back of his mind, Remus mourned for the marriage he and Hermione could have had. Mourned for the bride he would never carry past the threshold into his room. He set her down onto the broad bed, not even bothering to pull back the crisp white covers. He didn't wish to stay with her and cuddle beneath the warmth of those covers. This wasn't about love for Hermione anymore. This was about remembering Hermione, one last time.
Hair fanned out against the bed, Hermione looked up at him. Bare from the waist up, she looked like Eve. Blushing cheeks and pale lips against milky skin, perhaps she was more of an angel. Remus reached down to the waistband of her muggle jeans and slowly unfastened the button and unzipped the fly. As he tugged her pants and knickers down from her curvaceous hips and slender legs, he kissed a gentle trail down her smooth skin. If Hermione hadn't been so caught up in the sensation, she would have felt the occasional pattering of a tear here and there.
"I want you, Remus." She cooed to him, fingers tracing idle paths along her flesh. "I always have."
Completely naked to him, he felt drawn to her. He closed his eyes and remembered, for a moment, the first time he had made love to Hermione. He had been sweet and gentle with her, as she had been a sweet and gentle girl. She was no longer that girl, and hadn't been her for years. She was a woman now, and a woman who felt no qualms in taking what she wanted. Remus wished he could take what he wanted from her, but he couldn't. He couldn't be like her. Instead, he chose to make her happy one last time. He would take memories of her with him when he left in the morning. He wanted to leave a few memories for Hermione to keep.
Remus leaned down and kissed Hermione's silken stomach, one that once held two tiny lives that he'd helped to create. He kissed a path to the moist curls between her thighs and left one kiss on her there, one that sent chills up her spine. He was glad she didn't moan his name, it would have broken him. With swift fingers, he undid the clasp of his pants and tugged them down over his slender hips. Naked as Adam, he knelt at her feet, eyes wandering over her body for perhaps the last time. She was beautiful on the outside, but Hermione was nearly ugly on the inside.
Hermione's body accepted him willingly, warm and slick around him. He would remember the pleasure she gave to him so readily, but he would try to forget the consequences his love for her had. Remus wanted to remember the good times he'd had with Hermione. The strong emotion that had coursed through his body, the one he dared call "love". He wanted to remember Hermione as the innocent, tender girl he'd met at Hogwarts.
When dawn broke, and lemon rays of light pierced the dark of the bedroom, Remus crawled out from the bed he swore he'd not sleep in. Remus pulled on his rumpled clothes and went downstairs. He stared into the green flames of the floo powder he'd thrown into the fireplace. Remus thought back on the last night. The screaming and the tears, Ron's searing pain, and the passion he'd felt while making love to Hermione. He'd lain in Hermione's arms all night, thinking back on his life and the role she had played in it for so long.
He'd lived his life in secret since the moment he'd found himself looking at Hermione as more than a seventeen year old former student. Since the moment he'd caressed her skin, Remus's life changed. He'd kept secrets from the world before. With each new secret that Remus took on, less and less of him existed anymore. Remus wanted to emerge from the world of secrets. He wanted to live his life out in the open. No longer could he live his life behind closed doors.
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Please R&R.
I hope you like how it turned out..I'm satisfied with the story as a whole. I had intentions to kill Hermione, but I don't think Remus could have been the one to do it. His love was genuine from the start.
I'm sorry for the readers who thought I should continue this story longer, but it was time to retire it. The storyline was nearing soap-opera drama and I wanted to keep it dignified...I will, however, write about this pairing in the future.
If you like this story (and similar pairings) please read my Ginny/Sirius fic, "God of My Idolatry".
Meagan