Catscratch: The Story of Mimi Marquez

Chapter Six: Temptation and Rejection

I barely had time to catch myself from falling, as Roger pulled himself from my embrace. "Who do you think you are, barging in on me and my guitar?" He paused to look at me, as if my hurt expression would please him in some way,

"Little girl." Little girl? Yeah, right…Because little girls totally strip and do drugs and fall in love. "Hey, the door is that way," He gestured towards the door way. I tried not to cry, he's such a fucking asshole! Why is being like this? He's feeling me like I'm feeling him, I know he is!

"You better go, you know the fire's out anyway. Take your powder, take your candle. Your sweet whisper, I just can't handle!" Sweet whisper. Hm, maybe it wasn't over yet. He walked towards the door of the loft, God, this guy had serious anger issues. " Well take your hair in the moonlight, your brown eyes. Goodbye, goodnight!" He yelled, swinging the door open, he stuttered for a moment, and I took it as an opportunity to make this right.

"I should tell you, I should tell you," he kept repeating as I made my way over to where he was leaning, "I should tell you, I should," I placed my hand gently on his shoulder, " NO!" He yelled, making me jump as he swung around. I thought he was gonna hit me for a second.

"Another time, another place," He continued, chasing me back into his loft. He moved closer to me, and I tried to remain calm, " Our temperature would climb, there'd be a long embrace. We'd do another dance. It'd be another play. Looking for romance? Come back another day." He said the last bit as he walked past me, and picked up his guitar. I knew what that was-it was the dismissal bell. Yeah, like I'd go for that. I wasn't done with him yet.

"Another day." He repeated, shaking his head and looking-staring at me. He sat down and gave me the opportunity that I had been waiting for. I looked over at him, and repeated the words that Angel has once taught me.

"The heart may freeze, or it can burn." I inched towards him hesitantly, "The pain will ease, if I can learn." He refused to look back at me, so I walked around to face him,

"There is not future, there is no past. I live this moment, as my last." He finally looked up at me, a pained expression now replaced the angry one.

" There's only us." I knelt towards him, "There's only this," I continued, shugging. I needed to remind him to past his past behind him and focus on me. " Forget regret, or life is yours to miss. No other road, no other way, no day but today." He looked convinced for a second, but the next words to come out of his mouth were more hurtful than ever,

"Excuse me if I'm off track," he said, with a smug look on his face, "but if you're so wise, then tell me-why do you need smack?" He stood up again, this time getting more in my face. "Take your needle," he grabbed my arm, escorting me out of his apartment. I couldn't believe this! This was so ridiculous, what would it take for him to want me the same way that I want him? "Take your fancy breath, and don't forget, get that moonlight out of your hair!" He pushed me roughly out of his loft, I thought he was done, but I wasn't quite so lucky,

"Long ago you might have lit up my heart, but the fire's out and it's never gonna start!" I turned away, thinking he would close the door and go back to his precious guitar, but instead, he chased me out of my own building, shouting at me the whole fucking time,

"Another time, another place. The words would only rhyme, we'd be in outer space." I bit my lip to keep myself from crying, how could anyone be this cruel? "It'd be another song, we'd sing another way. You wanna prove me wrong?" I did, not so sure now. He finally stopped, and leaned on the banister, continuing to yell as I stormed out of my building, "Come back another day. Another day!" I took one more look at him, before I stepped out outside into the cold Winter night. I made a split second decision to keep arguing with him, not that it was likely to make a difference.

"There's only yes! Only tonight," I wrapped my arms around myself, to keep me warm and as a means of comfort. "We must let go, to know what's right," He had to let go of that May? June? April maybe? Yeah, I think it was April. He needed to put it behind him, and let me in! I was shouting at the top of my lungs, knowing he was listening. "No other course, no other way. No day but today!"

He stepped out onto the fire escape, and looked out into the city. He shook his head, as Angel, Collins and Mark turned the corner. He knew he would be outnumbered in this argument. I was still feeling him, and I knew that he wanted me, so why the hell couldn't he just give in? He had nothing to lose, except maybe his virginity- ha ha. "I can't control,"

"Control your temper!" He said to no one in particular.

"My destiny."

"She doesn't see!" I didn't see what?

"I trust my soul." I yelled up at him,

"Who says there's a soul!?" He yelled back,

"My only goal, is just to be!"

"Just let me be!"

He continued to shout at me, but as Angel put her arm on my shoulder, I focused only on what she had taught me, "There's only now, there's only here. Give into to love, or live in fear!" Angel's grip on my hands comforted me, and urged me to continue, " No other path, no other way," I looked up to watch him storm back towards the door, and looked into Angel's eyes, "No day but today." I looked back at Roger, he was avoiding my eyes,

"The fire's out anyway." He looked almost sorry that he was breaking my heart, than again-he was probably just feeling sorry for himself. He continued to rage, and I kept repeating my life's motto to no one in particular.

"Take your powder; take your candle. Take your brown eyes, your pretty smile, your silhouette." He was very emotional by now, and if it wouldn't have been for Angel, I would have been too. "No day but today, no day but today, no day today."

Roger stormed around some more, "Another time, another place. Another rhyme, a warm embrace!"

"No day but today! No day but today!" Angel was the only thing keeping me from crumpling to the ground. I couldn't contain my feelings anymore.

Roger looked down at me once more. "Another dance, another way, another chance, another day!"

With Angel's support, I managed to have the final words, "No day but today." The words before escaped my lips before I looked up at Roger, who actually made eye contact before disappointedly heading back into his loft. I looked as Angel, who had a sympathetic look on her face, before crumpling into her arms and breaking down, with her patting my hair, right there, on the corner of 11th street and Avenue B.