Ahem, it's been awhile since I've done Anime Breakdown or any other of my sotries…. O.O but that's only cause I've been really busy and the whole Riku'sAngel thingy ma bobby . My goodness you've had a lot of time to think about that didn't you. I can't add most of that, it interferes with the whole sesshy is … and … so on… v.v… so instead… I mi…nnoooo!! I'll just have to make modifications. :D so ..enjoy this chappy! But, good news everyone, I fulfill lebra girl's request for full metal alchemist. I hate the show and all of it's characters but HEY that's what the internet's for…so I can figure things out :P and you'll have to excuse me if I insult them :D
-Chapter 5- Fullmetal Monk
Guard 1: Raindrops keep falling on my head!!!
Scientist: actually that's radioactive waste.
Guard 1: oh…
While Guard 1 passed out, we move on to the gang.
Guy in an eagle's nest: waawk waawwwk.
A bird came with a bag of skittle's, opened the bag, and we all watched dumbfounded as the guy jumped up for the skittle's that came out. "How pathetic was that?" Sesshy said after the nest and bird disappeared.
Star: that was gold! Pure gold! Now all we need to see is that singing bunny sponsoring skittle's candy as well.
Singing rabbit: haaaaaawww haawwww haaaa!!!!! Haaaaayaaaaaaa haaayaaaa ayaa yaaaa.
Star: and maybe the Gieco dude too.
Gecko: Let's not delve into me personal life eh?
Star: and the Travelocity Gnome!
The Travelocity Gnome came flying in a chair with balloons tied to it. A sudden wind blew and he went flying faster and higher until he got mauled by a giant pickachu. Sniff, poor Travelocity Gnome.
Inuyasha: you know who would be even better?
Girl singing: Priceline Negotiator!
William Shatner appeared and everyone stared as he stroked Star's hand and told her to lower the prices for a random hotel that didn't exist. He made her click then afterwards he disappeared. Star shuddered and washed her hands uncomfortably.
Kagome: Now that that's over with, we can continue right?
Miroku: Um…is there a reason why that says Fullmetal Monk?
Star: catchy huh?
Miroku gulped. He didn't like the sound of Fullmetal Monk. He was afraid he might end up in an iron lung, or maybe an evil villain that wears an ugly metal suit and he would have to go around terrorizing a city full of underwear-on-the-outside wearing supermen. Supermen…why…!!!??? He shuddered.
Star: oh don't worry Miroku.
Inuyasha: yea…that's really reassuring.
Star: shut up Inuyasha …you stupid pirate that doesn't wear underwear.
Sesshy: just a thought…do I have to go anywhere? If you make it stupid like Strawberry Shortcake or the Cabbage Patch Kids I'll kill you…no…I will murder you…
Everyone stared at him glaring at Star with this creepy pissed off look. Everyone saw the volcano in the background. Star flinched.
Star: no no of course not… (twitch) not you…
Suddenly, Miroku began to disappear.
Miroku: I knew this day would come (sob).
Star: oh relax you'll come back eventually.
Miroku closed his eyes as he was transferred to the realm of short people, metal suits, and lots n lots of angst! And magical powers that's referred to as alchemy.
Rin: I wonder how Kikyo is doing…
Meanwhile…
Kikyo had fallen asleep. When she woke up she saw that Barney and fiends (yes I mean fiends) were gone. She started sobbing.
Kikyo: Isn't anyone going to help me!
X-FilesKids: (appears) Hello Kikyo…
Kikyo: (gasp) you again!
X-filesKid: (grin) So you want my help do you? Well let me tell you something. There's only one way out of here and that's through a door. But you don't just want to get out of here do you?
Kikyo: (raises eyebrow)
X-filesKid: To get back to your own time you must exit this building, go to the fork in the road, race a man with a crazy hairdo, jack his motorcycle, then ride towards the mountain that looks like a giant tuna fish playing a piano. Because we all know you can't tuna fish… aheh heh… I thought of that one last week…. Hehe tuna fish…
Kikyo: excuse my language but… that sounded like a bunch of hog swoggled chicken nugget fig newton shaznak attacked bag sack of crappy bologna sandwich…on a stick... with guacamole on top and a side helping of mushrooms.
X-FilesKid: (sob) those were harsh words, but what I said was all true. Besides, It's better than staying here.
Kikyo: that's true… so …would you mind untying me.
When the X-FilesKid untied Kikyo, she cried bloody murder, but in a good way. She was happy to finally be free and in an instant she was off to look for this fork in the road.
Meanwhile…
Miroku: this is the ugliest red overcoat I have ever seen… and why does it wear like a shirt…
Al: wow big brother, now I can call you BIG brother and actually mean it! You've gotten so much taller that your red coat looks like a shirt now. May I hug you?
Miroku stared at Al. Then he looked at his new red shirt, then back at Al.
Miroku: what are you supposed to be? Some kind of possessed demon suit? Demon be gone! (throws one of those things he throws… the papers yea I don't know what they're called…)
Al: Cut it out big brother we still need to go find that non existent object called the Philosopher's stone. But we need to be careful, there are many people trying to kill us even though we're just kids. Plus there are many fake Philosopher's stones everywhere so we have to make sure we get the real one. Otherwise I'll never be a real boy again and it's all your fault anyway. You never listen to me you should have just that one time and maybe we wouldn't be in this predicament. We could be home and I could be drawing or something. You should have known better than to try and revive mom I mean you were still little and when I say little I mean twice as small when you were just a child. (sob) We're never going to find this stone I'm going to be stuck like this forever aren't I? This is all your fault you know! May I hug you?
Miroku: so let me get this straight, your mother died because when I was a kid I was messing with things I obviously had no experience with and I tried to revive her even though that's against the laws of nature?
Al: right.
Miroku: and because I was dumb enough to make you revive her with me you lost your body but somehow I managed to put your soul in that dumb suit?
Al: right and you have a metal arm because of it also.
Miroku: and now we're looking for something that doesn't exist while trying to elude death because a bunch of adults are trying to kill us for no reason?
Al: yes.
Miroku: and even though this object doesn't exist, there are a bunch of fakes everywhere, people are trying to kill us, and were still just children we're still looking for this stone?
Al: it was your idea, you felt bad because it was your fault. Oh well at least you're doing this for me…did I mention that all of this is your fault? May I hug you?
Miroku: but this is as dumb an idea as the other one. First I pretty much get us KILLED trying to revive someone and now we're searching for something that doesn't exist despite the fact that people are trying to KILL us! It would be better if we found a nice sheltered place and stayed there.
Al: But then I won't be a real boy.
Miroku: (sigh) lead the way…
Al: May I hu-
Miroku: NO YOU MAY NOT!
Meanwhile…
Star: (yawn) I wonder when everyone will get back…
Rin: I'm still worried about Kikyo…
Star: don't worry Rin. Kikyo was only transported to the realm of that stupid big headed dinosaur to suffer a fate of listening to his crappy songs and that's not so bad plus I doubt it's possible that there will be psychotic children that don't speak well or like sugar or maybe even from the X-files and we all know Barney isn't a sailor scout and neither is Kikyo so that problem won't come up either.
Everyone: (glare)
Star: what…?
Inuyasha: you're so cruel hearted.
Meanwhile…
Kikyo: lets see first I need to find this fork in the road.
Kikyo kept walking along through a random forest scene. She soon came upon a fork in the road… it was a real fork you know the ones you eat with :D She didn't want to just leave it there. What if Barney and fiends came looking for her, she would leave no tracks!
Kikyo: this fork may come in handy (yoink)
Kikyo continued on down the road. She met up with a talking tree. At first it startled her and she pulled her bow on him but when she saw that he was friendly she took a chill pill.
Tree: HI! MY NAME IS TREE! NICE TO MEET YOU!! WHO ARE YOU!!!???
Kikyo: My name is Kikyo…why are you shouting I'm standing right in front of you.
Tree: I'M NOT SHOUTING!!
Kikyo: … do you know where to find someone with a weird hairdo?
Tree: YEA FOLLOW ME!
And so they continued on. With Tree as her guide, Kikyo felt pretty safe. She didn't expect anyone would bother her because Tree was so annoyingly loud.
Meanwhile…
Al: May I hug you?
Miroku: NO FOR THE 64 TH TIME!!! YOU MAY NOT HUG ME!!!!
Roy Mustang: Edward! My main midget er I mean man! Wow you've sure grown up since last we met.
Miroku: who is this?
Roy Mustang: don't act like you don't know me! (snaps and fire appears) see I'm a young n hip version of the human torch (grin) not to mention cooler.. oops I mean hotter. (conceit, self-importance, pride, vanity, smugness, snobbery, arrogance, superiority, self-satisfaction, bigheadedness, narcissism) (sorry this is what happens when you get a hold of a thesaurus o.O;;)
Roy licked his finger, put it on his butt and made a sizzling noise. Miroku was on the verge of crying. He didn't like this world. It was full of strange people that made no sense, an annoying talking metal suit that wanted a hug all the time and really dumb ideas and a guy who was pretty much in love with himself and his magical powers. Poor Miroku…
Roy: Anyway Edward we know that the world is a dangerous place, so I hired a bodyguard.
Miroku: Really? Well that solves at least one of my problems…
Armstrong: I was given strict orders to protect Edward and that's what I'm going to do!!! (yoink!)
Armstrong grabbed Edwa…I mean Miroku and stormed off leaving a trail of sparkles behind him. Miroku sighed.
Meanwhile…
Guard 1: phew that was weird.
Scientist: I'm glad you regained consciousness. You're the guard, I need you to be awake if the anime guys ever come so you can protect my… dare I say, inferior exterior. Heh I made a rhyme. :D
Guard 1: so why don't you work out then?
Scientist: I'm a scientist I don't have to work out! I'm super intelligent. Now protect me!
Guard 1: (sigh)
Weee yay for summer. Now that it's summer I can write so much more:D I hope you enjoyed this chappy…I think I'm a little rusty this one isn't as funny as I wanted. Oh well more chapters coming soon. Bye now :D