CHAPTER EIGHT
Never Once Seen Her

When debauchees are roused by the white, rosy dawn, escorted by the Ideal which gnaws at their hearts. Through the action of a mysterious, vengeful law, in the somnolent brute an Angel awakens. The inaccessible blue of Spiritual Heavens, for the man thrown to earth who suffers and still dreams, opens and yawns with the lure of the abyss. Thus, dear Goddess, Being, lucid and pure, over the smoking ruins of stupid orgies, your memory, clearer, more rosy, more charming, hovers incessantly before my widened eyes. The sunlight has darkened the flame of the candles; Thus, ever triumphant, resplendent soul! Your phantom is like the immortal sun!

The season is at hand when swaying on its stem every flower exhales perfume like a censer; sounds and perfumes turn in the evening air; melancholy waltz and languid vertigo! Every flower exhales perfume like a censer; the violin quivers like a tormented heart; melancholy waltz and languid vertigo! The sky is sad and beautiful like an immense altar.

The violin quivers like a tormented heart, a tender heart, that hates the vast, black void! The sky is sad and beautiful like an immense altar; the sun has drowned in his blood which congeals...A tender heart that hates the vast, black void gathers up every shred of the luminous past! The sun has drowned in his blood which congeals...your memory in me glitters like a monstrance!

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Yuki left her infront of a ballet studio downtown, the wind having whipped the sand from her hair and uniform till she looked as ordered as usual. She cast him a speculative look and then her usual wicked smile as she dismounted from the bike and disappeared into the building beneath a pair of flashing ballet shoes. Driving around on a stolen motorcycle, particularly a yakuza one made him nervous and uncomfortable and not only because it was merely luck and instinct that kept the thing upright. But he wanted to make a last stop before he abandoned it somewhere to be found and returned home.

An hour past six and the lobby of Niagata Hospital was all but empty but for the receptionist who shuffled papers that glowed luminescently beneath the florescent lights. She offered him a smile as he approached.

"Hello, again. Are you back to see Miss Amatasuka?"

He returned her polite expression. "No, thank you. I was hoping you could give me the room number for someone else."

"Of course. Their name?"

With a start Yukie realized that he didn't know. Distantly annoyed by his lapse he frowned. "A married couple. Elderly. The man's name is Kei."

The receptionist's eyebrow shot up instantly and her chipper welcome died like an old light bulb, flickering her fingers over the short bangs that shifted against her forehead. "You're visiting someone who's name you don't know? What relation are you to them?"

Lying was pointless and transparent so he simply shook his head. Her frown deepened.

"I'm afraid I can't give out--"

"It's already Sakaki." The voice was that powdered sugar tone from before and wrinkles carved a gently amused expression in the features of the dark haired woman that walked with bent grace towards him. She placed a wrinkled hand on his sholder as if he were a favorite grandchild and she beamed towards the receptionist. "This is Mr. Tsubasa's great-nephew-in-law. Or was it second. Oh, old minds can never remember these things. Why don't you come with me, dear?"

The last she addressed towards Yuki, her fingers tightening on his shoulder as she steered him away from the front desk and across the lobby at a hobbled pace. She smiled with fathomless cheer, inclining her head towards the patients the drifted through the ground floor.

"What did you say your name was, dear?" She questioned once they had passed into the labyrinth of the hospital's hallways.

"Sohma Yuki. I apologize if I've caused any trouble."

She laughed. "Not at all! But I didn't hear anything about Kozue being admitted again. And certainly not so soon after the last time."

Her evident concern made him feel guilty. "No, she hasn't. I apologize for the misunderstanding. I was hoping that you would allow me to speak with you."

Her dark eyed flashed curiosity. "Oh? Well then, I was just on my way to the cafeteria. Why don't you have a cup of tea with me?"

"It seems that I've been remiss in my manners." She said once they had settled comfortably into one of the booths in the hospital's cafeteria. She stirred little packets of sugar into a paper cup of tea that steamed steadily. "I'm Tsubasa Hikaru. And you met my husband Kei, the other day."

"Ah, yes! I was also hoping I could apologize for interrupting his game."

She chuckled, waving a hand like crinkled paper in the air. "Don't think a thing about it, dear. You saved him from another loss. He's ever teaching Kozue card games and once she learns all the rules she beats him flat every time. Nothing gets him quite as riled up." Her eyes laughed.

"How did you meet Miss Amatsuka?"

"Hmm? Oh, it must have been…about three years ago. The first time she was admitted to the hospital. My husband has a very delicate heart condition and so he's admitted here permenantly. Since those first incidents when she was admitted she's put in the room with Kei every time."

Yuki started in surprise. "Every time?"

Hikaru's regard became speculative now and she set her arm against the table and leaned forward in a conspiratorial manner. "How well do you know Kozue, dear?"

He flushed in embaressment but looked away calmly. "Not well, really. I've spent some time with her but I can never figure out what she's thinking or what she's going to do. She won't talk much about herself and her actions are contradictory."

Mrs. Tsubasa clicked her tongue against her teeth sympathetically. "Poor boy. You've picked a difficult road. Kozue isn't an easy girl to figure out." She leaned back again, looking sorry now. "To tell the truth, Kei and I know her little better."

"But…I thought you've known her for three years."

"Oh, we have. But you see, Kozue does nothing but jokes and plays around us." See his confusion she sighed, shaking her head. "Perhaps I'd better explain. The first time we met Kozue she'd been hospitalized after getting into a car accident. It was far more serious then the one you came to pick her up afterwards and she remained her for almost two weeks. She was very quiet at first during those days. I felt so sorry for the poor girl and I tried speaking to her but she wouldn't say a word. I could babel on and on and she wouldn't say a word. Well my husband told me to just leave her be but I'm a stubborn old woman. I just kept on talking away, chattering her ear off for that whole first week. By the second I thought it was hopeless. My throat was all about killing me in protest and maybe I was faltering in my words because next thing I know that girl's offering me a glass of water with the little smirk she can get and amusement written plain as day on her face. Well after that she started responding a bit and I was happy as a peach, you know. But then I made the mistake of asking about her family and she just shut down. Closed up like a clam and nothing I could do roused her. Well I was miserable and Kei saw that. Bless his heart, he strode right over to the girl and announced he was gonna teach her to play whist. Well he taught her and I stopped asking about personal things and after a while she started speaking again." She smiled at him ruefully. "So you see I really don't know much about her either."

"How many times has she been admitted since then?"

A brief moment of silence passed as Hikaru dipped into the well of her memory. "I couldn't say for sure. Thirty, perhaps almost forty times." She shook her head gently. "I can tell you one thing, that I think may help greatly. In all those times that girl's been here she's only had two visitors beside yourself."

"Who?"

"Well, that first time a woman came by. She said she was a teacher at Kozue's school. Aramoto-sensei she called herself. Well Kozue just refused to see her. She went into the worst fit and didn't settle until the woman left. A few months later there was a girl, a student at the same school judging by her uniform. Well, Kozue'd been taken for a check-up then and the girl just left a letter and rushed off without seeing her. I left the letter on Kozue's pillow and the next morning I saw it in the trash bin when the nurse came to collect them."

"What about her parents?"

"I'm told she lives with just her mother. But that woman…I've never…never once seen her." She looked miserable, expressive eyes dark with sadness.