Disclaimer: No own. Would like to have Sessy real…and after this weekend, I would love for Lord Anubis of Rinseternalsoul's creation to be real as well. *sighs and swoons* Also, I used "House of the Moon" as the palace title, with full deference to Resmiranda.

His Past, Her Present, Their Future

Chapter 3 - Agreement

A week later, things were returning to a state of relative normalcy. It was then that Kagome finally turned to Miroku in Kaede's herb garden with a serious look in her still-dulled eyes. "We need to start out to collect the jewel shards again, you know."

"Yes, I know," he responded, ripping up a weed and not quite able to meet her eyes. "But without my Kazaana, I'm not very sure how much help I would be… and..." he paused to glance up, "Sango and I are having our wedding in a week. We were putting it off until you were awake."

Her smile reached her eyes this time, though he quickly looked away. "Oh I'm so happy for you both!" she said the glee, wrapping her arms around his neck. Slowly, as she went back to the weeding, it hit her. This wasn't a cheerful proclamation to inform her. It was an explanation for why they would not be hunting with her for the Shikon Shards. With wide eyes she turned to look at him. "So… I'm alone in this?"

He cringed, the pain evident in his eyes. "You're never alone, Kagome. If you need our help, we'll be there. But…" Sango, having heard the conversation, walked out then and Miroku stood to join her.

"Kagome, you know if you need us we will be there in a moment…" her voice trailed off as Miroku's hands went around her waist to cup her flat stomach, and Kagome's eyes went wide.

"Oh, oh goodness, congratulations you guys!" She hugged them both tightly, swallowing the lump forming in her throat and nodding. "Yes. I understand. I would never ask you to risk this happiness. I'm really, really glad for you both. For now, though, I think- I think I need to be alone." She stood up and jogged away, not knowing where she was going, and leaving two worried friends in her wake.

When her eyes fell on Goshinboku a sob ripped from her throat, from her soul, and she laid across its huge roots, sobbing. Her world was falling apart. She couldn't go home without collecting the shards, and she couldn't collect the shards without help. What would she do now? She wasn't strong and independent like Kikyo. She had become strong in her years against Naraku, but there was no way she could do it on her own. Maybe she'd depended on her friends too much. Maybe she should have trained harder. But hindsight was twenty-twenty, as she'd heard it said, and now she was left reaping the consequences. She couldn't actually be angry with her friends, and she couldn't ask their assistance with Sango being pregnant. She was so happy for them, but she still felt so hopeless. So alone.

"Miko, stop crying," a voice resounded coolly.

Tears still falling she turned, locking gazes with the amber eyes of Sesshoumaru. "Oh, shut it," she mumbled, turning her gaze away. She didn't need this right now.

"Shut what?"

She sighed and turned back to him. "Nevermind. What do you want Lord Sesshoumaru?"

He raised one eyebrow. "I seek the idiot half-breed. Where is he?"

Her voice caught again and her chin trembled. "Well, just go back where you came from, because he's…" She couldn't hold back her sob, her vision blurring as hopelessness reigned down on her.

"Foolish girl. You weep for that mongrel? Did he run off with his clay pot?"

She rounded on him, on her feet in moments. Fury danced in her eyes as she stomped to face him, craning her neck to look up at him as she poked him fiercely in his armored chest. "I'm foolish? You idiot! He's dead! Are you happy now?"

His eyes flashed, but not with the fury she would have expected. Instead it seemed almost... knowing. "Hn. So, the idiot went off and died before I could kill him? I am done here."

Something in her mind tugged her, screamed that she couldn't let him leave. She gave herself over to that part of her. "Wait, Sesshoumaru!" she called as he gathered his youki cloud at his feet.

He turned, his icy gaze connecting with her. "What do you want from this Sesshoumaru?"

She froze in place and wondered why she'd stopped him, panicking a bit as his blank stare turned annoyed. She fumbled for words. "Uhh… please, stay with me for a few minutes, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

His glare softened minutely, back to blankness. "If this is about your insistence that I am your "friend", why are you being so formal?"

She smiled sadly. "Well, we haven't spoken in a few months, I thought it was better to be. Besides, you're the one who went back to calling me 'miko' and 'girl'."

"Hn."

Kagome rolled her eyes and sat on one of the roots of Goshinboku, motioning for the youkai lord to join her. He did so with his usual effortless grace and looked towards her from the corner of his eye. "What do you need from this Sesshoumaru?"

"How about your company? I don't feel like talking to the others. Every time they look at me I see their pity, and I'm reminded of everything that has changed."

"Hn," he said again, pushing a few claws through his hair. "Why am I any better?"

"You would never pity me," she said bluntly. "And your arrogance always makes me forget everything else."

His chest vibrated in a soundless chuckle. "And for this I am to be grateful, I assume?"

"No, but I am."

She couldn't see the tiny smile that formed on his lips, but she knew it was there. Two months stuck in the lord's palace and many subsequent late night talks had gotten her used to his mannerisms. He was still the same ruthless killer, and his icy demeanor never wavered, but she had found another layer to him. He was extraordinarily intelligent and spent more than one night talking to him until dawn. He wasn't as quiet as he made out to be, he just didn't speak if he didn't have anything to say. This was was rather often, really but not absolute. He was totally content to sit in companionable silence for hours, lost in his own thoughts. But silence wasn't something he came by often anymore, with a preteen Rin running rampant through his compound.

That brought a though to her. "Hey, where's Rin?"

"Still safely within the House of the Moon. Spring planting."

"Aww, I miss her. She's growing so quickly."

"Hn," he replied, silently agreeing. His young ward was approaching womanhood too quickly for his tastes, and it established a deep sense of her mortality in him that left him unsettled. He sighed inwardly and tilted his head up to look through the ancient boughs of the God Tree.

Kagome looked to him and was once again struck by his ethereal beauty. His upturned eyes were closed, the suns rays dancing across his flawless, pale skin. The more time she spent with Sesshoumaru the less guilty she felt for appreciating his shocking beauty. Breathtaking, really. She had grown rather fond of him in her time with him, for reasons that lay beneath his usual persona, but she had kept a tight reign on anything beyond that of friendly fondness for him. His head turned back down as her far-off eyes were locked on him, and his cool golden eyes met hers for a moment before she turned away, cursing herself for getting caught staring.

"If you wish to, you can return with me. She would be glad to see you, and your room is still your own."

Kagome worried her lower lip, a surge of warmth flooding her to know he would still have her room ready for her. But reality was harsh. "I would love to, but I can't," she said sadly, letting her head fall back against the tree's trunk

"Can't or won't?"

She sighed heavily, tilting her head to meet his gaze. "Seriously, can't. I have a duty to fulfill, and I have to figure out how to do it."

"That being?"

"To re-gather the shards of the Shikon Jewel."

"I still do not understand why it shattered again. It should have been almost whole after the battle. I know there is more to this than what you have said, Kagome."

She squirmed and looked away from him. "I don't want to talk about it, Sesshoumaru."

The clawed fingers of his single arm snaked over and grasped her chin, pulling her gaze back to his. "You will tell me, miko. I do not appreciate deceit."

"It's not deceit, Sesshou. It's just… not important. I don't want to talk about it; it's none of your concern." She turned her head to break his grip before standing with every intention of walking away.

Her belief she was going to get away from him was halted abruptly by a firm but not painful grip on her throat and a tree trunk to her back. She wasn't even aware of either of them having moved. "Listen to me, human, you will not tell this Sesshoumaru what does and does not concern him. This Sesshoumaru will decide for himself. And cease calling me bu that foolish butchering of my name."

"You listen here Lord Sesshoumaru, we've gone over this. You know this friendship thing we have? That means you cannot order me to do anything! Cannot! And if you don't feel the need to put up with this 'filthy human' then why in the hell are you here? Just leave me alone," she cried, tugging fruitlessly against his iron grip.

He sighed inaudibly and loosened his grip, but did not release her, "Kagome, we've been through this. I know where you are from things are different, but this is not that place. I demand, others obey. It is the way. You can choose not to tell your friends if you wish, I cannot stop you, but you will not be leaving me in the dark on this matter. We could avoid a lot of these petty arguments if you would just give in once in a while."

She softened, but her anger remained. "And you could do the same."

"And I do."

She scoffed. "Right. Name one time."

"For instance, right now. You are not dead, that is a large compromise on my part."

She rolled her dark blue eyes exaggeratedly. "If you must know, I will tell you, but can I at least be put down first?"

He appeared to mull this over for a moment or two before releasing his grip and once again reclining against the Goshinboku's roots. She made her way back and caught his impatient gaze. With a heavy heart she relayed to him the boundaries of her wish on the jewel, all the while looking at her loafer-covered feet. She told him of her inability to go home until the shards were recovered and her eventual departure when her task was complete.

His brow was furrowed when she concluded her story and he spoke slowly. "Then why must you collect the Shikon Shards? Keep the three you have, so you know the jewel will not be completed, and then make a life here. You told me once that you wished to."

"Yes, and I still do. But if it means sacrificing my family, or the lives of countless others at the hands of power-hungry youkai with shards, then I will go home. I will go back to my time and live a boring, plain, uneventful existence, and try to forget my time here."

He raised her gaze to his again, with a single finger under her chin. "Never forget your past, Kagome. Your past is what makes you, and if you forfeit such a bounty of knowledge that you learned here, or sacrifice your memories in order to save yourself a few tears, you are not the woman I thought you were."

Unable to hold back any more, she sobbed and fell forward into Sesshoumaru's chest. He stiffened at the unexpected contact, looking unsure what to do, before tentatively placing a hand on her head, as he did for Rin, and running his claws through her hair gently. "But…" she choked out, her voice muffled in his haori, "I can't even collect the shards! InuYasha is gone, my friends are getting married and starting their family, and I am too weak to go on my own. I'm such a fool."

She felt his sigh. "Miko, look at me." He waited until her gaze met his and frowned. "You may be weak of body but you are no fool. And you will get your shards."

"How do you figure?" she said, sniffing and trying to quell her grief.

"Simply," he said, standing and settling her on her feet. "I will assist you."