Wow! So many reviews, so little time! I didn't get home until after midnight, and I had so many reviews to read, I didn't get a chance to respond to everyone, but thanks so much!
Booth collapsed on the sofa, thankful just to be home. He was exhausted, but he was also determined to get Bones to talk to him. She looked as bad as he felt.
Brennan walked in and laid her keys on the table. "I only have a few minutes..."
"Bones, don't even think about it." He was not going to give her a chance to run.
She saw the determination in his eyes. Why had she ever thought she would be able to get away? She had a feeling he would tackle her to the ground before he let her go, gunshot wound or not. "Look, Booth..."
"You know I'm just worried about you, don't you?" He went on, not giving her a chance to answer. "Angela told me you haven't been sleeping, and you're working even more than usual."
Anger flashed in her eyes. "She shouldn't have told you that." She sighed. "I'm fine, Booth. You don't have to worry about me."
"Just because you say that doesn't mean I won't. You're my partner, and my friend. I'm always going to worry about you." He leaned forward. "You may not like it, but it's something you're going to have to live with. You may not have your real family around, but you have people who care about you. You don't have to do everything on your own. If you don't realize that soon, you're going to break."
"It's not up to you to save me, Booth, no matter how much you think it is."
"You're right." He stood and walked toward her. "Only you can do that. But you need some help. You need to face your fears, to deal with it. If you don't, it will eat away at you." He stopped and took her hand. "Believe me. I know."
Brennan looked into his eyes, eyes haunted by the things he had seen, things he had done. "I know you do, Booth. It's just..." She stopped. She had to get out of here. If she stayed much longer, she would be telling him everything. Her fear of losing him, how she felt about him.. "Look, Booth, I really do have to go, okay? And as much as you seem to think otherwise, I can take care of myself. I've been doing it for 15 years." She started towards the door.
"Bones, wait." He reached over, his hand catching her wrist, turning her back towards him. He couldn't let her go. "Stay. You don't have to talk about anything, I promise." He was desperate. He didn't want her to walk out the door. He needed her, as much as she needed him. "Please." He dropped her hand. "I'm just going to go change, okay? Promise me you won't leave before I get back."
His eyes were pleading with her. "Okay." He looked at her for a moment, then he turned and walked into the bedroom.
Brennan fell back onto the sofa. What was she doing? She knew she should leave. It wasn't safe for her to be around him. Her resolve to keep him at a distance was already crumbling, just by his nearness, by his touch. Her brain knew what she should do, but her heart...her heart was a different story. When she looked into his eyes, all she wanted to do was collapse into his arms, to let him hold her, comfort her, make the fear and pain go away. No, she had to be strong. She had to do this. She stood up. She would keep her promise to stay until he came back, then she would insist that she had to leave.
She brushed past the table, and the bag of belongings he had brought home from the hospital fell, spilling everything out onto the floor. She leaned down to pick them up, and froze.
Among everything, one thing stood out. Booth's shirt, torn and covered in blood. Her heart started to pound in her chest. She saw him lying on the floor, in a pool of blood. She closed her eyes, but the image remained. Broken glass sprayed across the floor. She heard the sounds. The gunshots. Karen's screams. Jeremy's crying. Booth, bleeding, trying to tell her... "No, no, no" She shook her head. She hadn't realized that she had been backing up until she felt the wall behind her. Her eyes opened, and she stared at the clothing on the floor. "Booth" she whispered. Her legs gave out, and she slid down the wall to the floor. The tears fell from her eyes, and sobs wracked her body, as she finally surrendered to her emotions.
Booth pulled the shirt over his head. He hadn't really needed to change, but he knew she needed a few minutes alone. He wanted to get her to talk, but he couldn't do that if she left. He would go as slow as he needed to, but she was going to talk to him. He needed to get back out there before she changed her mind and ran, promise or no promise. He wouldn't push her. He knew he couldn't force her to confront her feelings before she was ready, but he was going to be there when she was, whether she liked it or not. He had looked into her eyes, seen the fear, the exhaustion. The uncertainty. He wanted to take her in his arms and comfort her, but he knew that right now it would only push her away.
He opened the door, walked out into the living room, and froze. She was sitting on the floor, her back against the wall, her arms wrapped around her legs. Tears ran down her cheeks, and her body shook with sobs. "Temperance?" He moved to her and bent down, ignoring the twinge of pain from his wound. Her eyes looked through him, to a spot on the floor in front of her. He turned to follow her gaze. Why the hell hadn't he just thrown the clothes away at the hospital? He turned back to her. "Temperance, please. Look at me." His hand touched her cheek.
"Booth. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't..."
"Shhh, it's okay." He pulled her into his arms. She leaned into him, her cheek resting on his chest, her tears soaking the front of his shirt. He sat there, holding her, stroking her hair, whispering to her, until her body stopped shaking.
Brennan felt the strong arms holding her. She breathed in the scent of him. Why did she always feel so safe in his arms? She felt like nothing could hurt her. She didn't want to feel this way, to be so dependant on him, on anyone. She knew she should go, but she couldn't seem to move. She was so tired. Just one more day. She could lean on him for one more day. Tomorrow she could let go.
She was aware of his hands, caressing her back, the warmth of his body against hers. She pulled back and looked up at him. Logic and reason left her as she looked into his eyes. She wanted nothing more at this moment than to let go, to give him what he wanted, to take what she needed.
Booth's breath caught as he looked into her eyes. He leaned down towards her. Their lips met, and he shivered. Kissing her was like nothing he had ever felt before. She put her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. Booth lost himself in the kiss, in her. His hand caressed her cheek, sliding to the back of her neck, pulling her closer and running his fingers through her hair. Her hands moved past his shoulders, down his chest, heat following the path of her hands. Only then did he realize what he was doing. She was vulnerable, emotional. In pain. He couldn't take advantage of that. He ran his hands down her arms, and encircled her wrists. He pulled back from her, breaking the kiss. It was the hardest thing he had ever done in his life.
Brennan opened her eyes. She missed his hands on her, his lips on hers. She tried to break his grip on her arms, to pull him back to her, but she couldn't. "Booth, please." she whispered. "I'm so tired, tired of seeing death everyday, of closing myself off. I just want to feel alive." She leaned toward him. "Make me feel alive."
"Temperance." God, she was breaking his heart. "I can't, you're upset." His eyes pleaded with her to understand. "You'd only end up hating me. And yourself." He watched the look in her eyes change from passion, to confusion, then finally to understanding. The tears started to fall again, as she bowed her head, putting her arms around him. He held her there, his heart breaking with her as she wept.
So, what do you think? I know, I'm heartless and cruel, aren't I? Next chapter will be up later today, I promise!