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His Past, Her Present, Their Future

Chapter 19 - Tension

A heap of silk as coverings are divested. Graceful fingers dance across burning flesh in the dead of night. The song of pure ecstasy rings in the couple's ears as they lose themselves within one another. Obsidian and moonlit strands combine, splayed across silken sheets. Cries of pleasure, of completion, of destiny.

The woman's back arches drastically into her lover's touch, pressing her body into the scorching source of heat above her. Her partner moans as her legs move to wrap around his hips. Her control is nearly lost as she digs her nails into his muscled back, raking them across his shoulder blades as she screams his name…

The dreamers awoke, breathing heavily, trying to dismiss the visions from their mind. It was not yet dawn, but neither would find sleep again that night.

Kagome had been in the Heian period for a month now, and in that time, she had studiously avoided confrontation with Sesshoumaru at all costs. Mattaki had business to attend to on his northern borders, so with her 'protector' gone she had simply avoided Sesshoumaru and hoped that he would not seek her out. It had worked, for the most part. She spent most of her time with the Lady Kaori, and any free time spent sitting in the Northern Garden with a notebook.

She had come to the conclusion that, should she ever make it back to Modern Japan, she would write a book series of her adventures. Surely the truth of her life was more exciting than any author's mind could ever hope to imagine. That was, of course, if she ever got back. She cringed as the thought crossed her mind. Would she? Or would she stay in this period and live out her life? And if that were the case, would that erase the memories of her past with InuYasha, with Sesshoumaru?

It took her a moment, but she clearly remembered Sesshoumaru at the well. He'd known she was coming here, right? That was what his warning had been for. This train of thought always led her to scowling vehemently. Damn him! Why hadn't he told her sooner? And then she remembered that she must leave a terrible impression on her someday-friend, considering all the times he'd tried to kill her.

And now, this morning, she was awoken with that dream. Her face burned in remembrance.

Kagome shook her head free of the traitorous thoughts. Sure, she could admit being attracted to Sesshoumaru (her Sesshou, of course) but actions like… that were not something she would give up for lust and affection. She wanted to be sure. Often times people discounted true love as a fairytale, a foolish dream. Even she found herself sometimes believing it. But she was sure, positive, that somewhere out there was a person who would love her so completely that they would gladly spend eternity with her. All she had to do what find him.

She giggled at her girlish fantasy. It was the one thread of her eternal innocence that she had retained through every argument with InuYasha, through every night she found him with Kikyou, through every tear she cried. Even if InuYasha had not been that person, she would find him. And if she didn't, she was perfectly content to just wait it out. She hoped. She could always be one of those scary ladies who lived alone with fifty cats and who frightened the neighborhood children. It would be pretty funny, actually, to launh her cats as projectiles at the kids if they tried to walk on her lawn.

Kagome huffed a sigh into her unruly bangs and pulled on a midnight blue yakuta, laughing to herself. The days were getting warmer now that summer was in full swing. She eyed the lavender tendrils that wound their way up the contrastingly dark material with a smile. With so many kimonos that clashed so terribly, it was nice to find a few that were complementary to her modern tastes.

Another heavy blush stained the young miko's cheeks as a flash of a similar kimono sliding to the floor played in her mind's eye.

Her servant, the mousy girl having been replaced with a pleasant horse youkai, entered as dawn broke and was shocked to see her charge out of bed and already dressed.

"M'lady! Already awake, I see?"

"Mmhm. I couldn't fall back to sleep, so I thought I would dress. How are you this morning, Mizuki?"

"Well, you've taken half my fun away, so at least let me fix your hair. I'll tell you about my evening then."

Kagome giggled. "I would like that Mizuki."

Kagome relaxed into the older woman's tugs on her uncontrollable mass of hair, letting her mind slip away from all thoughts of silver-haired youkai, the future, and emotion. The servant girl and she had become fast friends once she had mentioned to Mattaki that her former servant seemed adverse to her humanity. It was nice to have someone to chat with.

When she was properly primped, refusing the cake-like makeup as usual, she left her chambers to find her way to the dining hall. Mattaki had returned sometime late last night; she had been able to feel it when he arrived. His youki was so powerful it was impossible to mistake him for anyone else. She smiled widely at him as she entered, bowing her head in greeting.

"I see you have returned, my lord."

"Ah, my friend. How do you fare?"

She noted the lack of Sesshoumaru at the table as she took her seat beside the lady of the palace. "Well, my lord. Did your business go well?"

"Yes, it was menial and I am very glad to be back in more pleasant surroundings." With this he threw a glance at his mate, who blushed prettily and smiled at her food.

Kagome giggled. "Well, we certainly noted your absence. This castle just isn't the same without you!"

"I trust my son gave you no problems?"

Kagome coughed discreetly and looked away. "Ahh, no. I avoided him."

A bark of laughter was her reply. "So I see. Speaking of young Sesshoumaru, where is he?"

"Here, Father," a melodic baritone called out, and the pale form of Sesshoumaru glided into the hall. For once, he did not glare at her, but refused to even glance in her direction. Kagome couldn't help glancing up, and her breathe caught in her throat. His usually light ensemble choices were replaced with a black haori and hakama, silver threads adorning the belled sleeves. She blushed as another flash of dream played before her eyes and she tore her gaze away.

Both the lord and lady noticed the tension between the two, but since it was a silent tension they left well enough alone. The morning meal went on quietly until Mattaki grinned and stretched back languidly. "I have not slept so well in weeks. Did everyone else sleep well?"

Kagome turned the color of the crimson sash around Kaori's waist. Sesshoumaru choked on a bite of food. Now the two elder youkai were intrigued. "I take that as a no?" Kaori said with a light laugh.

"Ahh…" Kagome tried to think of anything other than the images from the dream. "My sleep was good, but I woke up after a dream and couldn't go back to sleep."

She glanced up to see the stunned look on Sesshoumaru's face. He glared at her incredulously for several moments. "I was awoken early as well. Nightmares, you know?"

Kagome irrationally snapped back, despite how unlikely or impossible it was that Sesshoumaru had had a dream even remotely like her own. "Oh yes, nightmares. I woke up and was glad I did not take dinner last night, otherwise I would have had to purge myself."

Sesshoumaru growled. "It did not matter that I had not eaten, I did."

Mattaki finally broke the staring contest. "Would you two care to clue us in to what you are referring to?"

"No!" they both shouted before standing and stomping from the room in separate directions.

Kagome stormed into the castle's dojo and pulled a bow and quiver from the first rack she saw. Paying no heed to the other occupants, he began firing off arrow after arrow at a far target. Her aim had been honed well in her four years with the weapon, and it showed when all the rapidly-fired arrows hit their target, though few were at the center. She fumed and took solace in the familiar wood in her grip, the twang of the bow string, and the dull thuds of her arrows finding their way home. Home. Home where her family smiled during their meals, home where she could shower, home where she knew people and did things and people cared.

She didn't notice the quick retreat of the former occupants of the dojo, all made uncomfortable by the spiking snaps of her holy aura. It only increased as she fired again and again, the arrows flaring a hot white as they struck. She was tired of being constantly torn from place to place. She was tired of losing her loved ones. She was tired of being the one who knew nothing, the one who said the wrong thing, the one who sat as a burden on the shoulders of others. She was furious and hardly noted the hot, rage-induced tears that fell down her cheeks, snapping the bow again and again.

But the muscles of her neglected arms could only take so much, so when an arrow she was readying sprang away when she couldn't draw back the string, she could do little but sink to her knees, finally giving into the urge to scream. "I want to go home!"

The arms that wrapped around her were comforting, and she turned into the embrace as the sobs finally consumed her. She weakly beat at his chest before giving in and allowing herself to be swallowed in his arms, gasping for breaths that were hard to take. The arms were unyielding as she wept.

When her sobs finally calmed to whimpers, she chanced a glance at the owner of the lap she sat in. Silver hair and golden eyes. "Mattaki, I am sorry for being so weak. I must be such a bother to you." She laughed without humor.

A clawed finger pressed to her lips. "Hush, child. You lasted longer than I thought you would. It is not healthy to keep such emotions pent up, you know. Now, tell me what plagues you?"

"I just… I want to go home. I don't even know which home anymore! I don't care if its my time or that of your sons, I just want to be somewhere I belong, somewhere I understand! I have been here a moon and still have no idea why I am here."

"But is that through any fault of your own?"

She huffed a bit, rubbing at her cheeks to get rid of her tears. "No."

"Then stop wallowing. You are a strong young lady to put up with even a single member of my bloodline, let alone two. This may not be a time you are accustomed to, but I expect you thought very little of my sons' time when you first arrived either."

She giggled weakly around a pathetic hiccup. "Well, with InuYasha trying to kill me and yelling at me every five minutes, that's a safe assumption."

"Why not try to make the best of your time here? Is there not anything that sparks your curiosity?"

"Well, yeah, there is. I would love to see Heian-kyō… and I want to get to know Sesshoumaru here… and you for that matter. I have heard so much of you, and I can't deny liking the idea of getting to know more about you than Sesshou was willing to tell, or than Myouga had time to before running off..."

He gave her a genuine grin, fangs and all. "Well, we can do all three! Perhaps not immediately, and Sesshoumaru will take work, but those three things should occupy you for a while, should they not?"

She smiled back and leaned into his chest in something resembling an embrace, though her hands stayed in her lap. "Thank you so much for all you've done, Mattaki. I wish there was a way to repay your kindness."

"Worry not, my friend. Just continue to take care of my son in the future and we shall call it even?" He stood, taking her with him before settling her feet on the floor.

"He would resent that remark."

"Well, then, it appears the present and future versions of my sons have something in common, then."

Hours after her calming talk with Mattaki, Kagome found herself wandering amongst the flowers after nightfall. The summer sky seemed to be alive with the twinkling of the stars, the near-full moon casting an ethereal glow on the garden. She wondered what the date was. It was sometime in July, she thought, or was it August? She wasn't even sure when she had lost track of the days. It had been in the Feudal Era, she knew.

She meandered past some imported roses and stroked the soft white petals. So soft. She didn't register the approaching youki signature that advanced on her, but when gravel crunched only a few feet away, Kagome snatched her dagger from the folds of her obi, gripping it and spinning on her adversary as she had been made to practice.

Her wrist was caught easily, and she stared up into the molten gaze of Sesshoumaru, who looked at her contemptuously. "You think such a meager blade could ever be used against me, mortal?"

Kagome glared. "Meager, is it?" She wrenched her wrist from his grasp and offered him the dagger. "Take a look and say that again."

Unable to resist the curiosity, Sesshoumaru took the blade, which hummed happily in his hand. He studied it closely before realization dawned on him. "This is… my fang?"

Kagome smirked mockingly. "Still think it's meager?"

"Why do you have a blade made from my fang?"

Kagome sighed and shook her head. "Because Toutosai took it upon himself to make it when we went to get your own blade repaired. You did not mind, and in fact agreed with Toutosai about me needing a more close-range weapon."

Sesshoumaru glared. That did seem like something he would think, if this woman really was his friend. After all, a bow and arrows were useless in a one on one fight. "But why would I let you have it? A blade made from a youkai's fang is kept within families, going to children and mates!"

Kagome burned crimson. "Well, I do not know why you did… do… whatever!"

Sesshoumaru leaned closer to her, scrutinizing her closely. "I would be suspicious if I did not know that I would never be interested in a human."

Kagome's fury blazed around her. "You bastard! You'll see when you-" she cut herself off and feinted right before dipping around the youkai's left side, leaving Sesshoumaru to jog to catch up.

"Tell me of myself, if you know me so well."

"I do not know you now, I know what you will be."

"Then, how did we meet?"

Kagome snorted ruefully, continuing the trek back to the castle. "You tried to kill me."

"Ah, I am smarter than I thought."

A huffing breath escaped Kagome and she stopped, whirling to face him. "Do you always have to be such a jerk? I didn't do anything but smell like you, and you have me pinned as a terrible person!"

"I did not say that, though I do admit to thinking you were a liar. And what is a jerk?"

"It's a word I think was invented to describe you, whether it's now, then, or in the future."

"So then, it means 'debonair and skilled', does it?"

Kagome's eyes went as big as saucers. "Leave it to Mister Arrogant to say something like that. Urgh!"

"Mister Arrogant? That is what you call me in the future?"

"No, though it fits. As do things like 'Ice Prince' and 'Arrogant Bastard', like others call you… and Fluffy…" she snickered as she said that one, "but I just call you Sesshou."

The silver-haired teen made a face. "That is foolish."

"You think so then, too. You get over it though, because I am so adorable."

"Who is arrogant now?"

The two smirked at one another before realizing they were speaking civally, and turned to face the opposite direction. Kagome stomped back to the palace, but not before tossing a small smile over her shoulder. "Goodnight, Sesshou."

She was gone before he turned back around, a small smile on his own lips. "Goodnight…Kagome."