Mike Nelson was barely able to regain consciousness on the medical examining table.

"Oooh…," he moaned. "Where am I?"

The doctor approached.

"Welcome to Gizmonic Institute," he said.

Mike's eyes popped open.

"Gizmonic Institute? Isn't that the super-secret laboratory dedicated to coming up with new inventions?" he asked.

The doctor stared at him for a while.

"Well, not so secret after all," he grumbled.

Mike sat up.

"Well, it's hard to keep secrets like that. It's like Area 51."

"There's no Area 51."

"Then what do they do with all the aliens?"

"There's no such thing as aliens."

"Yes there are! I saw a lot of them while I was on the Satellite of Love."

The doctor looked at him quizzically.

"Yes, about that… I'm sorry to tell you this, but you've placed under arrest by the government for stealing the Satellite of Love," he said.

Mike sat there for a long, trying to comprehend this.

"Um…pardon?"

"Well, that's what happens when you steal government property," the doctor said condescendingly.

"But…but I didn't steal it! These mad scientists conked me on the noggin and they shot me into space!"

Mike made a rocket noise and made an upwards motion with his hand to illustrate it.

"I see," said the doctor. "And who were these mad scientists?"

"Dr Clayton Forrester and his assistant, TV's Frank."

"That's impossible. Dr Forrester was fired ten years ago."

"Yeah, right when the Satellite of Love was shot into space."

Then Mike remembered something.

"Wait… Where're Crow, Tom, Gypsy and Cambot?" he asked.

"Who?"

"The robots! Where are the bots?! Are they okay?!"

"Ah, the robots. They've been placed in storage."

"…And?" asked Mike, motioning for him to continue.

"And after some experiments are performed, we'll decide what to do with them."

"But…but, you guys aren't going to hurt them, are you? I mean, I've come to think of them as my friends."

"Look, buddy, I'm sure no harm will come to them. Let's just hope they do well in the experiments."

Mike gulped nervously.

On the other side of Gizmonic Institute, four robots were sitting in a lab.

Crow and Tom Servo were strapped down into chairs, and Gypsy was strapped to wall because she wouldn't fit in a chair. Cambot was unable to be contained because he could just float away, but he felt a loyalty to the others, so he stayed in the room with them.

"Well, another fine mess Mike has gotten us into," complained Crow. "It's just like him to get us trapped in a government conspiracy!"

"Oh, come on, Crow. It's not his fault," said Tom.

"You know, you're right. It's your fault!"

"What?!?"

"You were the one who was driving! Why'd we let you drive? Your arms don't work!"

"Well, at least I didn't need help getting into the theater!"

"Yes, you did!" Crow shouted.

"Well, maybe I did, but at least I didn't cry at the first sign at danger!" Tom went on.

"Yes, you did!"

"Okay, well, at least I don't humiliate myself thanks to my confusion!"

"Servo, you're naming off your character profile by continuing to talk!"

"QUIET, YOU TWO!" Gypsy shouted. "We're in a real fix! This is more dangerous than anything we've been in! Something could happen to us! And we don't know where they took Mike!"

Crow and Tom looked upset.

"We're sorry, Gypsy," they chimed remorsefully.

"We've gotta find Mike and get out of here," said Crow.

"But how?" asked Tom.

Just then, the door opened, and a scientist approached.

"We'll think of something later. Just play along for now," Crow whispered.

Tom, Gypsy and Cambot nodded in agreement.

The scientist sat down before them.

"Hello, Robots," he said. "I'm Dr Lyle. Who are you?"

Crow and Tom stared at him.

"We're not Little Richard and Tommy Kirk, if that's what you're thinking," said Tom.

"We're the Bots from the SOL," said Crow.

"I was looking for names, actually," said Dr Lyle.

"Oh. Gypsy? Give him the Robot Roll Call," said Tom, turning towards Gypsy.

Gypsy opened her mouth, and a clipboard slid out into Dr Lyle's hands.

"Ah," he said. "Cambot?"

Cambot buzzed in low.

Dr Lyle grinned weakly and pushed him aside.

"Gypsy?"

"Oh my stars!" cried Gypsy.

Dr Lyle stared at her.

"Tom Servo?"

"Check me out!" Tom said cockily.

Dr Lyle then looked at the last name, unsure how to pronounce it.

"Crooooow?" he asked.

"I'm different!" said Crow proudly.

Dr Lyle stared at them all.

"Um, okay. That's nice for you. Anyway, I'm here to conduct some experiments on you."

"Does it involve watching movies?" asked Tom.

"No."

"Good. We can't stand movies anymore after all we've gone through," said Crow.

"Such us?"

"Oh, there was a buffet of crappy movies on the Satellite of Love," said Tom. "We could name so many."

"The Crawling Eye, Bloodlust, The Creeping Terror, Skydivers…," said Crow.

"Catalina Caper, The Sidehackers, The Unearthly, The Atomic Brain…," said Tom.

"Mitchell, the Brain That Wouldn't Die, the Last of the Wild Horses, the Deadly Mantis…"

"And tons…"

"And tons…"

"And tons of shorts!" they ended together.

"Yay," said Gypsy.

Dr Lyle stared for a while.

"Right, well, Crow and Tom, you two shall be in the first experiment. I want you both in that chair over there," he said at last.

"Ah yes, save the tragedy for tomorrow, but have the comedy tonight," said Tom.

"Indeed."

Half an hour later, Crow and Tom had been attached to a giant chair and were hooked to a bunch of wires.

"I had no idea we had any outlets on us," commented Crow.

"This isn't the eye test where we read off letters, is it?" asked Tom. "I've never been good with that. I don't have any eyes."

"Well, we're about ready to conduct the test," said Dr Lyle.

"Conduct? I've never been comfortable with that word," said Crow.

"Don't worry. You're both completely safe."

Crow and Tom glanced at a sign on the control panel they were hooked to.

It said "DANGER. HIGH VOLTAGE. DO NOT STICK A SPOON IN HERE."

Dr Lyle noticed. "Oh, don't worry. That sign shouldn't even be there," he said.

But Crow and Tom continued to stare at it.

"I'll remove it if it bothers you," he said.

"It bothers us," said Tom.

"Bothers us like a bratty kid sitting behind us on an airplane to France," said Crow.

"Ooh, good one!"

Dr Lyle got out a small metal knife and attempted to remove the sign.

BRZAP!

"GGAAAAACK!" he screamed.

He froze and toppled to the floor.

Crow and Tom stared at him.

Then Crow started to look around.

"Is there a doctor in the house?" he shouted.

The next day, a new doctor came to see Tom and Crow.

"Hello, Mr Robot and Mr Servo. My name is Dr Paul," he said.

"If we ask you who you're replacing, do we get a cookie?" asked Tom sarcastically.

"Today, we want to try an experiment called numeric placing," said Dr Paul.

"Does it involve a plug in my butt and a man being fried?" asked Crow.

"No. No it doesn't."

"Well, sorry for seeming nervous. There's still a silhouette burnt into the floor."

Dr Paul glanced at the silhouette, and then laughed nervously.

"Well, we determined that Dr Lyle had a heart condition, and that his death was completely unrelated to the mild shock that he received."

"I'd start warming up the court summons if I were you," said Tom.

"I wouldn't worry about that."

"The man was cooked in his shoes! His glasses were fused to his skull! His hair caught fire a few seconds later!" Crow objected angrily.

Dr Paul groaned inwardly.

Later that day, a third doctor arrived.

"I'm Dr Ray," he said.

"Where's Dr Paul?" asked Crow.

"He's taking his vacation early."

"Did you hear about Dr Lyle?" asked Tom.

"Yep. Bad heart."

"Sticking to your alibi, eh? Can't sez I blame ya."

"Let's try some word association," Dr Ray said. "I'll say a word, and you two say something back."

"Bacon," said Crow.

Dr Ray looked at him.

"I haven't said anything yet."

"Well, nothing that piques my interest, at least."

"Sit."

"We are sitting," said Tom.

"No, that's the first word. Sit."

"Oh. Well, bacon."

"Sunrise."

"Breakfast," said Crow.

"Square."

"Meal," said Tom.

"Left."

"Overs," said Crow.

There was a pause.

"Are you two hungry? Can robots eat?" asked Dr Ray.

"We could stand a nibble, yes," said Tom.

An hour later, Crow and Tom had just finished a giant pile of fast food and candy. Wrappers were strewn everywhere.

"Feel better?" asked Dr Ray.

Crow made a fart noise.

"I do now," he said.

"May we proceed with the test?"

"Fire at will," said Tom.

"Okay. Here is the first word."

There was a pause as Crow and Tom just stared at him.

"Is there a problem?" he asked.

"No," said Crow, shaking his head.

"Okay. Here is the first word."

Another long pause.

"We're ready. Go ahead," said Tom.

"No! Here is the first word! Here!" Dr Ray groaned.

"Are you toying with us?" asked Crow, getting agitated.

Dr Ray sighed.

"Let's try another word."

"Let's," said Tom.

"On."

"Off," said Crow.

"Up."

"Down," said Tom.

"Toast."

"Dr Lyle," said Crow and Tom.

There was a pause as Dr Ray glared at them.

"In."

"Out," said Crow.

"Cold."

"Dr Lyle," said Tom.

"Okay, we're done!" said Dr Ray, who got up and began to leave.

"The man had to be removed by a chimney sweep!" Crow said.

"And where's Gypsy?" demanded Tom.

In another room, Gypsy was being held by her tubing and being whipped around in circles.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH! OH MY STARS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!" she screamed.

She screamed louder as she spun faster.

Crow was positioned before another doctor.

He glared down at them.

"Hello. I'm Dr Mickey. I'm going to show you some inkblots."

Crow stared.

"Does this involve electric shock?" asked Crow.

"Let's just let that die," Dr Mickey sighed.

"Good choice of words."

Dr Mickey pulled out the first picture.

"Let's start with this one," he said. "Mr Robot?"

Crow looked long and hard at it.

"Dr Lyle struck me as a warm and gentle man who didn't have any reading comprehension," he said as he looked at it.

Dr Mickey glared hard at him.

And Gypsy continued to be spun around the room.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!! YOU ALL CAN JUMP UP MY TUBE! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!" she hollered.

Tom was sat down in a room with his dome removed so that he couldn't see. He was drinking out of some cups.

He paused as he drank from the first.

"Hmmm…," he said. "This one is definitely the Dr Pepper."

Crow sat before a woman this time.

"Hello, I'm Dr Carnage," she said.

"Catchy," said Crow.

"Thank you. I'm going to show you some pictures."

"Of you?"

"No."

"Small miracle."

Dr Carnage glared.

"Identify these," she said.

"No lunch?"

"No lunch."

She held up a picture of a man with sunglasses and a beard.

"Identify this man."

"Ringo Starr. Can I ask you something? What's your opinion on the food around here?"

"Passable," she said. "Can you identify this?"

She held up a picture of a spaceship.

Crow groaned.

"I was wondering when that would come up," he said, rolling his eyes.

"Ah, are you aware of the Star Ship Enterprise?" she asked.

"I know it's an icon for dateless nerds with no lives or appeal," he said.

"And tell me about your spaceship."

"Technically, it was your spaceship," said Crow. "I was, in fact, built from certain pieces of the Satellite of Love. But now, the only place I could ever call home is destroyed. Everything I ever had is gone, except my friends and my large collection of Tattoo magazines."

"And what of your life, Mr Crow. Are you sad? What scares you?"

"Besides Coleman Francis and Hal Warren?"

"Yes."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

Crow motioned for her to come closer.

Dr Carnage leaned in.

"I'm a bit curious about the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy of Gizmonic Institute. I guess it works to your advantage, doesn't it?" he asked slyly.

Dr Carnage froze and stared at him.

Tom was placed in a cart with a helmet over his dome.

"Can I get a set of those little wings? I've been a good little pilot," he said.

"3…2…1…Engage."

BEEP!

SHOOM!

"WHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAA!!" Tom screamed as he was rocketed down a track.

CRASH!

"Quick! Get the jaws of life!" Tom wailed.

Crow, Gypsy and Cambot had been watching.

"Ooh," they moaned.