Okay this will be and stay as a one shot, though I may make a companion piece and make it a second chapter in Roy's POV if people like it enough. I'll tell you now that I've only seen The FMA movie once, so I'm not too sure about what was actually said and what happens in the flashback, so don't flame me if what's said and done isn't perfect to what actually happened/was said in the movie. Apart from that this is RoyxEd you don't like it leave.
Disclaimer: If I'm writing this fanfic, then I obviously don't own it, if I did, FMA would be a Shounen ai anime.
Enjoy!
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Longing
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Edward Elric was sat on the window sill, looking through the plain glass window and looking intently up at the grey sky, and sighed sadly as rain poured from the heavens, it was getting late and all in the town was calm. The blonde teen turned his head to look at the sleeping figure in the bed; Alphonse his little brother, no longer the giant hulk of armour he used to be, instead he was an 18 year old in a 15 year olds body and was currently sleeping peacefully on the bed, his eyes closed and his breathing even.
Ed smiled to himself sadly as he looked at his hand the one that was covered in a synthetic skin colour fibre, but still had automail underneath; he'd yearned to get his brother's body back, it's what he'd lived for, what he'd joined the military for and even if he hadn't gotten his own limbs back he was happy enough knowing Al was human again.
Even if they weren't in Artemis, this world was now a peace where they lived was nice and quiet, many people were doubles of the ones they knew or had known, in fact there was only one person he hadn't met who had a double; Colonel Mustang.
'So why do I feel so empty?' Ed thought to himself and mentally groaned, he'd been making himself avoid this question ever since they'd closed the gate and this feeling had started, it wasn't just emptiness he was feeling, he felt a sense of longing for something, though the blonde had no idea what it was, he also felt like he was missing something, but again Ed was clueless.
Ed sighed once more and leant his head against the cool glass window and closed his golden eyes as his thoughts drifted back to 2 years ago when he's managed to come through the gate.
Flashback
Winry had hugged him first, relived he'd come back, she looked so happy to find him alive, then he saw his little brother and was overjoyed, hugging the other ecstatically; when he'd passed the gate he didn't know if the transmutation had worked, but to find that it had and seeing his brother in the flesh was one of the happiest moments in the blondes life.
The reunion was short lived though, as Al and Ed needed to stop the huge Nazi ship that had crossed the gate after the elder Elric, from destroying everything in sight. As they transmuted the ground to make a tower of earth to rise and meet it, they almost fell from the tower when the ship opened fire at them then fire had flown from behind Ed and destroyed the gun turret. Al's smile and his eyes widened in recognition and Ed turned. Roy mustang, the Flame alchemist; the man who had sent him on pointless missions, and teased him about his height in his youth was smiling at him, and nodded, silently urging them to go on, telling them he had their backs.
It wasn't long until the tower they'd made was tall enough for them to get onto the ship and Roy leapt from the balloon and ran up it in front of them. Roy sighed as he ran and he spoke actual words to Ed for the first time since they had been reunited "I figured it was you who had brought all this trouble here Fullmetal"
If the situation hadn't been so serious Ed probably would have laughed in relief, same old insults, same old Colonel. "Jeez I just get back and this is what I get? No 'Hello nice to see you after 2 years' or 'It's good to see you alive', no, you just shower me with insults! Thanks Colonel Bastard" Ed snapped back in reply but a smile was on his face as he said it, and the blonde wasn't too sure but he swore he saw Roy smiling too. Al sighed at this and sweatdropped at the exchange "Please don't say such things brother…" he said but he knew it wouldn't do much good. When they finally reached the deck, they ducked for cover as more gun turrets were transmuted out of nowhere, and Roy used his fire alchemy to destroy them "Go and stop the ship! I'll cover you!" Mustang ordered. Al and Ed nodded and ran ahead; Ed looked back at the doorway for a second, the blonde alchemist, smiled and nodded before giving a salute, a rare sign of respect off Edward, before following his younger brother.
Roy smiled at this "I always knew you were alive…" He whispered to himself, but somehow Ed managed to hear it just before another burst of fire destroyed a gun turret in a small explosion. When the task was done Ed used alchemy to cut some of the ship apart. "Al I've cut of enough of the ship for you to transmute for you and the Colonel to land safely, I need to seal the gate on the other side before this gets worse, Colonel...destroy the gate on this side…and look after Al for me" Those were his last words before Ed turned and went back inside the ship, a few moments later his brother joined him saying that Mustang had let him go and that he said he'd get rid of the gate, and as his brother said this he felt sadness overwhelm him, but he pushed it aside as he did what he had to, to destroy the gate...
End Flashback
Ed sighed, after that the gate was closed off and he and Al were cut off from the world they'd spent their lives in, where all their friends were, Ed felt the familiar pang of longing and sighed 'Who though? Who the hell am I longing for? Winry?...No not Winry…It can't be Al because I have him here…no…it couldn't be…' Ed's eyes snapped open and his mouth dropped as he felt that pang of longing again, but this time much more severe as he thought about Roy Mustang.
'Is he…is he the reason I feel empty? Because he's not here anymore? I don't get it; I didn't feel like this before…' But Ed knew he was lying to himself; he'd felt a sense of longing in this world four years ago, when he was on his own, but back then, Ed had thought it was because he was missing his brother, not because of a certain flame alchemist! Ed groaned quietly as he put a had over his heart and rubbed the area gently "Stop it" He muttered to himself "There's no way you can see him again, and there no way he can see you, I…I have to live without him…"
Ed's golden eyes softened and grew sad as he spoke and before he could stop himself, his eyes filled with tears and fell silently down his face. After a moment Ed realized what he was doing and cursed quietly as he wiped his eyes. 'Damn it what am I doing?' He thought 'It's not like I…' Ed broke off and sighed 'Oh who the hell am I kidding? I've been in love with him since I first saw him that day when I lost my arm and leg and he'd come looking for our father…Heh I thought it was a dumb crush…'
Ed wiped his eyes again, but then more tears fell from his eyes as he reminisced, but these one's he didn't bother wiping away "But dumb crushes don't last for eight years" Ed whispered aloud "All the arguments, all the fights, and teasing about my height, I enjoyed them, deep down, it was my sneaky way of getting closer to you, every time I tired to punch you it was to touch you…I'm meant to be a genius and it never clicked that I was in love with you and I was stooping so low for your attention…until now, oh god if you were here you'd probably be laughing your ass off at me right now…" Ed sighed and closed his eyes as he pictured what Roy looked like the last time he'd seen him, he had an eye patch on his right eye, but the man still looked beautiful, almost untouchable in Ed's mind.
"I wonder if you ever knew the truth." Ed whispered to himself "I wonder if you ever suspected I loved you? Or even if you secretly loved me back?" Ed sighed and closed his eyes, more tears falling from his face. "I guess I'll never know now, I guess I'll never be able to see you to gather the courage to ask…" Ed brought his knees up to his chest as he curled up and began to sob quietly, sadness washing over him as it finally sunk in that he was never going to see the man he was in love with again.
"You bastard!" Ed sobbed "You'll probably go on without me and get married and have kids just like Hughes always hinted at you to do and you'll forget about me, everyone will forget about me and Al; Havoc, Winry, Riza, Gracia, Elysia, Feury, Breda, Ross, Falmen, Armstrong…they'll all forget…" Ed whispered as he continued to cry, his heart was beating and he was alive, but he was without the one person he wanted and it made his heart hurt.
His heart was longing, longing for one person, it was just sad irony that they could never come and quell it…
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Okay what did you think? I know I know its very angsty and stuff but what would you be like if you had been thrown in another world and it just hit you, that you were in love with someone who you would NEVER be able see again?
Also I forgot to mention but Edward is 20 in this fic too, He's spent 4 years in the world past the gate, two of those years were with Al.
Any way comments are appreciated; this took me all of 30 minutes to think of and writ this, I was listening to this song while I did so and was my inspiration for the story: http/ Rotaski
