20.long gone

He crept into the manor in the still dark of the night like a shadow. Indeed, he even felt like a shadow- nothing but a faint image of the man he was when he departed for Alderaan over a standard week ago. Darth Vader was becoming consumed with turmoil. His emotions had always been a source of weakness as a Jedi, fortunately for him it was a source of strength as a Sith- but now, his emotions had rendered him unable to function in either the light or the dark. He couldn't embrace the light due to his fears, but whereas they once strengthened him through the ways of the darkside, the nature of the emotion alone… compassion, caring, friendship… a desire to protect- they were wholly incapable of creating the type of power that fueled the Sith.

As soon as he reached the stairs, he could feel the heavy blanket of sleep that was currently wrapped tightly around Aurren. He moved slowly but surely up the stairs, opening the outer door to her chamber with a wave of his hand, not even breaking his stride as he entered her rooms.

Instead of being greeted by a room full of moonlight, he noticed that all of the curtains in the outer rooms had been drawn. Using the force to enhance his vision, as well as keeping tabs on the sleeping woman, he moved through the rooms quietly, and through the open door to her bedchamber.

Once more he entered a pitch-black room. He moved to the curtains and gingerly pulled them open enough to let a sliver of the silver moonlight fall onto the sleeping lady in the bed. As he turned from the curtains to look at her, his eyes dropped to the floor and he noticed the trail of clothing that led from where he stood at the windows, to the foot of the bed.

He moved to the bed and sat down as gently as he could so as not to disturb her. He was still feeling guilty about the sleep suggestion from the previous night. He could tell she had already been asleep for a long time, and that she would continue to sleep until well into the morning.

Looking at her, he couldn't help but think about the day that they arrived at the villa, when he had entered her room and watched her sleep. He had been so confused that day… in truth he was still confused. He simply sat there and stared at her. A smile spread across his lips when she turned over onto her back in her sleep, the covers slipping down to her hips revealing the scant undergarments that were her only clothing.

Accompanying the smile was also a deep blush to his cheeks as he looked away. It occurred to him that he had picked out these garments… even though it was hurriedly and without much consideration. He never assumed that he would actually see her in them… well, in only them. And as he turned his eyes back to her, his grin widened as he thought about how perfectly they suited her. He swept his eyes over her- from her long dark lashes that fluttered with dreams against her cheekbones, down the long elegant length of her neck, past her clavicle to the swell of her décolletage covered only slightly by the simple but elegant cream colored silk bra. He followed it down lower past the arch of her hip to where matching cream silk panties rode low on her hips.

He felt a growing discomfort the longer he sat there. He knew that what he was doing was something she would not be comfortable with. In fact, he even found it slightly creepy that he was lurking in her rooms late at night while she slept and looking lecherously at her scantily clad form. A new heat rose to his face, this time from shame and embarrassment for violating her- even though she would never know it.

He rose to leave, but then turned back for one last look. He reached down to her, where the sheets were collected at her hips and moved to cover her with them when he found himself stopped… and staring at the white, silky, perfect skin of her stomach. Suddenly, she was no longer perfect. He could see the cuts and bruises from his visions littered across her once flawless skin. He released a breath that he did not even know he had been holding.

He moved away from the bed, and used the force to cover her back up instead of doing it with his hands. He needed to distance himself from this.

He didn't think anymore as he left her rooms and entered his own. He ordered a protocol droid to come and pack for him. He would be leaving for a few days. He had to leave.

As the droid packed, he made his way down to the kitchen, and placed himself in the chair in front of the hearth where he had sat for the past week as he waited for Aurren each morning. He picked up a data pad and began to write… and then stopped. He left momentarily, then returned with a sheaf of paper and a pen. Sitting down once more, he picked up the pen and began writing.

Miss Farr,

I am sorry that this letter is all I can leave to inform you of my departure. A situation has arose which requires my immediate attention. I do require you to stay here at the Villa and continue your work. In fact, my direct orders to you are to not leave the grounds until my return.

I know you will not question my orders or disobey me. You have been one of the few people since the rise of the Empire that I feel I can truly trust to fulfill my orders unquestioningly.

Here, Vader stopped. 'Did I just… "trust"?'

"Yes,' he thought, 'trust is an okay word. Trust is ok. That reveals nothing…'

He couldn't believe that he was putting so much effort and thoughts into simple orders to a subordinate.

'But these aren't simple orders to a subordinate… are they…'

The truth of the matter was, he knew that when Aurren found him gone, only leaving this note, she would feel as if she had done something to upset him, and would quite possibly prepare herself for his wrath upon his return. That was something he wanted to avoid all together. Although she really was the reason for his leaving, he didn't want her to know that. He did however, want to save her from feeling as if she had.

He began again

I look forward to continuing our work upon my return.

'There…' he thought, 'that should help, I think…'

He signed the note with a large black "V" that had become his trademark and did not look at it again as he set it on the table and left the villa.

It was late in the morning when Aurren finally woke up. Glancing at the clock, she shot up in bed with disbelief. It was mid-morning… mid-morning the next day! She had slept from early the previous afternoon until now.

She had to admit that she felt much better than she had yesterday, but she was shocked that she had actually slept- soundly- for that long.

She stayed very still for a moment, trying to discern any sounds of Lord Vader moving about the house. She wondered if he had even returned the previous day. She couldn't hear a sound.

Aurren scrambled off of the bed and to the wardrobe and dressed hastily. It wasn't until she came out of the closet that she noticed that her curtains were open- not completely, but she was certain that she had shut them all the way the afternoon before to block out all the light. She noticed the way a single shaft of light seemed to fall upon the place where she had once lain on the bed. She did not however, even begin to entertain the suggestion that someone else had opened the curtains. She had no clue that Vader had been in her room hours before watching her.

She thought herself much like a mouse as she crept through the house quietly, trying to keep her ears open for any sound of her Lord. She even peeked around corners to see if he was in the rooms before entering them. At long last, she found herself in the kitchen. He was no where in sight. She glanced out the back windows towards the ship hanger, and noticed that it was gone. "I guess he didn't come back last night," she said aloud to no one.

It was then that she noticed a single sheet of parchment laying on the table with a pen on top of it. The first thing she noticed was the large black V at the bottom, signifying that this was written by Lord Vader. "I guess he was back…"

She read the letter at least 4 times before she finally put it down.

Aurren was somewhat relieved at what appeared to be the light tone of the hastily scrawled letter. As short as it was, three words stuck with her. "Trust" and "look forward".

He trusted her? He looked forward… well, to continue their work but… perhaps it meant to see her as well.

Maybe he wasn't mad at her. Maybe she wouldn't feel the down pouring of his wrath after all.