Word spread quickly in camp kidney, in fact, the bean scouts knew what happened nearly as soon as it happened. One of the many things bean scouts were notorious for, besides the smell of their socks and the feminine way they wrote, was the way they gossiped more effectively than any bunch of teenage girls any where. Dave and ping pong even published their own gossip column. And so all the campers of camp kidney, and a few curious squirrel scouts, managed to get up the next day at the crack of dawn driven by the pure hope of seeing something bad happen to someone else.

They gathered around near a strange structure that hoo-ha built and waited for something cool to happen.

Soon Raj showed up he was being pushed by patsy, he had to be, he was too scared to move. Patsy was trying to console him despite the fact that her father was merely a few feet away. In the crowd clam and Lazlo were holding up a 'we believe in you Raj' sign. Edward was standing next to Lazlo, where Raj usually stood. "this is going to be good" he grinned.

"I know" said Lazlo happily "me and clam even baked a cake for raj's victory celebration later"

"Celebration!" clam echoed.

"That's not what I meant you idiots there's no way he'll…" Edward started then he glanced at the sign and decided to let them of with a "-groan- losers!" while wondering how anyone would be comforted by the thought that a bunch of morons, who believed in a scoutmaster that lived in the sky and threw air conditioners at people, believed in him.

In fact Raj was comforted by this and, despite the way he was acting, he was considering himself quite brave, I mean, he wasn't trying too hard to run away was he?

"You'll be fine" said patsy. She brought her face close "I'm sure you can do it!" Raj blushed.

"Hey! No fraternizing with my daughter!"

Raj jumped back a few feet "y-yes sir!"

"So" said patsy "where is this test, daddy?"

Hoo-ha raised a hand and coughed demurely into it "if you were to direct your attention to the left…"

Raj and patsy directed their attention to the left.

There was nothing there.

"No! My left!"

"Oh!"

To hoo-ha's left stood one of the most deadliest pointiest looking obstacle courses in the world.

"I even installed a shark pit!" added hoo-ha merrily.

"Where did you get a shark?!"

"Nurse's office! Duh!"

At the bottom of the shark pit nurse Leslie wheeled around in circles loath to leave his chair even underwater.

Raj was bustled to the obstacle course's start line where he stood sweating bullets. Hoo-ha pulled out a timer and set it. "You have …TWENTY MINUTES!!" he bellowed in raj's ear. Raj started wishing he was an animal with smaller less sensitive ears.

Raj stared ahead of him waiting for the commander to holler 'go'; he shuffled his feet and thought 'this obstacle course isn't so bad!' This is denial, and then he thought 'I can totally do this!' and this is extreme denial the kind used to stop you going off the deep-end. Raj knew this but it made him feel better to try to think that the obstacle course he was just about to face was as small and unoffending as he was. Despite this it stood just as intimidating as ever perhaps even more so. Raj tried to think of the things he had on his side, well he had pretty powerful legs and …and...Well, Lazlo and clam believed in him, even if they showed it with some of scoutmaster lumpus's best bed sheets and lots of colorful markers. Patsy believed in him too he knew she did and really didn't want to disappoint her and he certainly didn't want to lose her since for the first time in his life he had someone to be reckless for.

"GO!" yelled hoo-ha the anger in his voice making Raj wonder if the guy could sense when boys were thinking about his daughter. This frightening thought propelled Raj quickly across the first quarter of the obstacle course in a blind panic. He nearly ran into the first hurdle it came up so suddenly that he tripped and bounced over it and, thanks to his rounded bouncy body, screaming over next three hurdles.

He landed and rolled to his feet and tottered forward "that wasn't so bad!" he said, dizzy, and ran into a wall. He looked up it was a wall with a rope attached. Wait! he was supposed to climb up this? Was the commander crazy? He grabbed the rope and scrabbled up the wall. Unfortunately for Raj his arms were not as powerful as his legs were, in fact, they weren't powerful at all they were weak and noodley.

"Flap your ears, Raj!" suggested Lazlo.

"Fly!" said clam.

"Do I look like dumbo to you!" screamed Raj near the top of the wall, his arms straining. He finally managed to flip himself to the other side. it had taken him so long to get over the wall there was no way he'd finish the obstacle course before time ran out.

The next obstacle was one of those wire mesh things you crawl under. Panting and cursing under his breath Raj got to his knees and started wriggling his way along the course.

"He's too slow" said Edward.

Lazlo frowned and waved his "we believe in you, Raj" sign higher.

Raj tried to speed up but the space under the wire mesh was too muddy he kept slipping. Hoo-ha grinned to himself and started counting down the last few seconds aloud "15…14..." raj's hand fell on something hard and smooth buried under the mud. Slowly, he looked down and his eyes locked with the compound eyes of a huge cockroach who had been enjoying a luxury mud bath. The cockroach grinned.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhh!!"

Raj shot out the other side of the wire mesh at super speed running for his life, for he was sure a cockroach that big could have his head off in a split second.

"12 …11..."

He grabbed a rope that was in front of him and swung over the shark pit where Nurse Leslie made absolutely no attempt to lunge at him.

"10…9…"

Raj started to slow down exhausted.

"8…7…6"

The cockroach peeked its head out of his shirt it grinned and whispered in raj's ear "'ey baby..." Raj screamed disgusted, frightened and possibly sexually harassed. He flew over the last few obstacles and reached the end just as hoo-ha finished saying four.

The crowd of campers cheered since all of them were the type that got picked last for basketball teams; they were amazed as his athletic feat.

"Raj you did it!" Lazlo cheered throwing the sign into the air.

Scoutmaster Lumpus looked up horrified "blanky?"

Commander hoo-ha looked at his timer in disbelief. He shook it a few times and put it to his ear, wondering if it was slow. he looked up and saw his daughter rushing up and hugging her boyfriend. Hairs stood up on the back of his neck. No way was she old enough to have a boyfriend! He tried to think fast nearly spraining his brain muscle, and then an idea struck him. He sidled up to Raj and patsy.

"That was amazing Raj you just whooshed past those last few obstacles all of a sudden" patsy was saying

Raj chuckled nervously wondering how she didn't see the cockroach, it had been nearly the size of a truck but at the same time he was glad she didn't.

"Good job good job" barked commander hoo-ha.

"t-thank you, si-"

"And you finished just in time for your second test too!"

There was a sound like a record dying.

"Ex-excuse me?" Raj stuttered.

"Your second test! What? Do you think I'm some kind of wimp or something giving people only one test? A real man would have twelve at least!"

"Eleven"

'Eeeh?"

"I-I already finished one sir!"

"Whatever… wait here!" The commander walked off to find his next test.

"Pasty..?" Raj said.

"Yes Raj?"

"I am not very fond of your father" he said in a guilty tone.

"That will make our wedding awkward"

"Wedding?" Raj wondered how they had jumped from dating for two weeks to engaged.

Hoo-ha returned dragging scoutmaster Lumpus by the neck. He'd been having so many great ideas lately and usually it took him weeks for a new thought to lodge itself into his head.

"Commander Hoo-ha? Why are you dragging scoutmaster Lumpus like that?" asked Lazlo slightly worried but somewhat amused.

"Oh this?" said commander hoo-ha lifting up his victim who was trying to play dead. "This is the next test!"

"Scoutmaster Lumpus is my next test!?" Raj asked panicked.

"No!" the commander shook Lumpus like a lifeless fish "your next is…to capture the Algonquian moose! Ha! What do you think of that!?"

Raj leaned over to his best friend "…help me…"