Disclaimer: Truthfully, I never would have thought up Invader Zim. So…no, I do not own.

Summary: Zim has finally thought of the perfect way to stop Dib from interfering. But Dib isn't going to stop trying, even as he tries to find a way to reverse what Zim did to him.

'thought'

"speech"

-0-0- is a scene/character jump

Chapter 3

Zim ran straight to his house and disappeared inside.

Dib, however, was not a fool. He knew better than to try and barge right into Zim's lair unprepared and without scouting out first. But he had come prepared!

Opening his bag, he took out his equipment and began his scouting mission. The windows were dark, so maybe Zim had taken refuge down in his lab…

Sneaking closer, Dib went around the entire house, and finally gave a large grin. Zim wanted him to come inside, that much was obvious by his behavior. Well, he'll just have to surprise Zim! He wasn't going to fall for the obvious trap!

Oh no, he was going to wait until it grew dark, and Zim would think he wasn't coming. Then, he could sneak in through the window, avoiding the gnomes at great cost. If he was stealthy enough, he could do it. He had done it before. And then, he would not take the trash can down, as he had done before. Instead, he would take the table entrance that he had seen the dog-robot use. That would surely surprise Zim!

Snickering, he crouched in a hiding place in the next door neighbor's yard to wait for dark.

-0-0-

Zim, meanwhile, was indeed down in his lab. He sat in his chair; Gir perched on the back of it, laughing victoriously as he raised a small object into the air.

"Look, Gir! The secret to my success in this plan!" he proclaimed. He held in his hand a small tack, with small glowing red lights on it.

"But master…you tried that before, didn't you?" Gir asked, in one of his rare moments of lucidity.

"Yes, Gir, I did. But at that time, it wasn't the method of getting the cells into The Dib that failed, it was what happened after! No, this method worked so well the first time, why not do it again? Besides, he won't be expecting a similar trick as the first one from me!" Zim crowed, laughing.

"OK. I want a cookie." Gir said, and took off, leaving Zim to mutter to himself about the magnificent plan he had come up with.

"Dib-beast should be getting in here soon, if I have learned anything about him." Zim said, giving a sharp grin as he headed towards the lift.

-0-0-

And indeed he was right!

Dib had slipped past the gnomes, and was currently congratulating himself on his upgrade in sneaky-skills as he began to open the window.

Carefully and quietly he crept inside the dark house, glancing back and forth anxiously, his camera at the ready.

Little did he know that Zim knew he was there, and was quite prepared for him.

Dib walked quietly through the living room, heading towards the lift. As he got close, the desk flipped up and out came that little robot!

"Huh?" It turned a curious gaze onto him. Then its eyes snapped red. "Intruder!" it cried, going into a battle stance.

Surprised, Dib backed up and ended up tripping and falling back.

"What are you doing in my lair, pitiful human?" Zim cried out, suddenly appearing near him as he ran out of the toilet chute.

Dib cursed. He was caught! Getting up and whirling around, he took off. But not before Zim was able to get close enough to launch a blow that took Dib by surprise. Normally their battles did not come to physical blows, though some did.

Whatever Zim had hit him with, it stung. He shook it off and disappeared out of the window, Zim's threats echoing behind him.

-0-0-

Back at the base, Zim gave a satisfied smirk as he surveyed the sharp object held in his palm. He had gotten Dib good with it, and if it worked the way it was supposed to, by three days he would start feeling the effects.

Two days after those three days would be the day Zim would have to help his enemy again, for by that day Dib will start being more Irken than human, and would need a Pak to survive on Earth.

Now, Zim could refuse to help, and just let him die. But where would the fun in that be? Oh no, he wanted to see that infuriating human drown in his anguish as he realizes he is what he seeks to destroy, and any person he might have gone to for help would gladly put him on the autopsy table instead of Zim.

Yes, he would be kind to his enemy. Actually, he has so far been nothing but kind! Dib now is going to be Irken, a great honor for anyone! Of course, Dib will not see it that way, but he will learn! He will learn when the human-filth of Earth continue to ignore and reject him!

Zim snickered as he went down to the labs again.

It would be rather amusing if The Dib decided that he couldn't take the isolation and abuse anymore, and came to Zim for help. Yes, it would be rich indeed if Dib-beast turned on his old, uncaring Earth and aided Zim in the conquest of this disgusting planet!

But Zim knew that was highly unlikely, unless a large amount of persuading and maybe a mind wipe or two were involved. Hmm…he might have to keep those in mind for later, if Dib proves to still be a nuisance even after his change has completed.

Well, all will be proven in time. Meanwhile, he should get started on the Pak he was planning on giving to Dib. Zim wanted to make some special modifications to it…

Once again, his laugh rang through the metal pipes and machinery that lurked under the deceptive house.

-0-0-

The days passed, Tuesday became Wednesday, then Thursday. On Friday, however, the last day of class before Spring Break, Dib woke up feeling rather…odd. Not really ill, but just…wrong. As if something was not right.

He frowned. Could Zim have done something to him? No, the young paranormal investigator had been keeping a watchful eye on Zim for the past two days to see if he was going to take revenge on Dib for his break in on the base.

But Zim had just grinned coldly, with that same 'I know something you don't know' look in his eyes.

Dib walked with Gaz to school, and mused over his symptoms. Light headed, which made him dizzy. A weird, not-quite-pain in his gut, and an ache in his bones that felt like he was going through a growth spurt. Maybe this was normal and he actually was?

Maybe.

With a sigh, and a shake of his head to clear it, Dib went to class as the bell rang, and once again started his glaring match with Zim.

-0-0-

Spring Break at long last!

Dib heaved a relieved sigh. No school for a whole week! That meant plenty of time to observe Zim, stop Zim's evil plans, try to get evidence of Zim's alien form, and prove the next door neighbor's ferret was actually a vampire changing his shape to fool the humans into a false sense of security.

Yes, it was going to be an enjoyable spring break!

That is, if he would stop feeling so weird. Actually, this has gone past weird, and was bordering on scary. He was having problems with many things. And the ache in his bones and his gut were getting worse. Maybe he was getting sick, like he had first thought? Dib looked in his mirror in the bathroom, and noted that he was looking a little green. Leaning closer to the glass showed that his eyes were odd, the pupils shrunk so far as to be pinpoints, with the normal amber color of his eyes seeming larger than ever.

Yes, he must be sick. He was feeling rather tired, as well. Shrugging, he decided to turn in early, and so he crawled into his bed and closed his aching eyes, deciding a nap would be the best thing for him and whatever mysterious illness was plaguing him.

However, his sleep was broken later that night. Jerking up at the sound he had heard, he pulled his hurting body out of bed and began to search, remembering at the last minute to pull his glasses on. Throwing his trench coat on, he realized he had fallen asleep in his clothes.

No matter…there! The sound again! It was out in the hallway…

Narrowing his eyes, he reached for his door handle and, taking a deep breath, yanked the door open.

Nothing, nothing but empty hallway.

Sighing, he turned around to go back to bed.

"Hello, Dib."

Letting out a loud yelp of surprise, Dib jumped backwards into his closed door. Zim stood mere feet before him, grinning that smug grin of his.

"What are you doing here, alien scum?" Dib hissed, eyes narrowed.

Zim, however, just eyed him up and down, examining his green-tinted skin, the obvious fact of his eye color being more prominent than before.

"I am here to give you something, Dib-filth." Zim said calmly, and pulled what seemed to be a similar contraption to the one he was already wearing out from behind his back.

"What? Why? What kind of trap is this?" Dib growled, eyeing the thing warily. It had to be at trap. This just screamed trap! But…alien technology…he could examine it and finally have proof…but why would Zim give him something that he knew Dib would use against him?

"Trap? No trap. Can I not be nice once in a while?" Zim asked innocently. He scrutinized Dib's appearance, and tried to hold down a smirk. The concoction was progressing nicely, and soon Dib will need the Pak. Not yet, but who knows how fast it might progress? It was already farther along than the computer had estimated! Just goes to show that the superior Irken DNA is conquering the weak human DNA without much resistance, as it should be!

"No." Dib answered immediately, going into a more defensive stance, eyes narrowed.

"Well, fine then. Accept it or don't, it does not matter to me." Zim lied, grinning. He knew that temptation and curiosity would make Dib look at the Pak, and examine it. He also knew that when Dib was at the stage where the Pak was needed to keep him alive, that it would be there. He also knew that Dib would not show anyone the Pak until he had finished examining it himself, and by that time he would be Irken, and any attempts to show somebody would bring about his own doom!

Dib was too easy to predict sometimes.

Zim tossed the Pak onto Dib's bed, and vanished out the window before Dib could say anything.

Muttering under his breath about crazy aliens, Dib cautiously approached the Pak, expecting it to blow up in his face at any moment.

Nothing happened.

Now more curious than cautious, Dib picked it up and began looking at it.

It was what it seemed, a Irken Pak. So…why would Zim do this?

Curious and suspicious, Dib did not sleep much that night, nor the next two nights. Not just because of the Pak, but for a far more sinister reason.

He was getting worse.

-0-0-

Dib woke up the next morning, and practically screamed in shock.

He could see…he didn't have his glasses on, but he could see! Oh, how he could see! He could see better than he ever could before.

Leaping out of bed, he got a flash of vertigo and stumbled, throwing his hands out to catch himself. But he did not get up…he was staring at his hands.

His hands…they were different…three fingers, and there was a definite green color to his skin.

Now freaking out, he staggered to his feet and ran into the bathroom. His eyes widened at the sight of himself.

His eyes…they were solid orbs of amber, and glinted strangely in the harsh lighting of his bathroom.

They were like Zim's eyes…

He was definitely green, and out of his hair…were antennae. It was hard to tell at first, but the odd feelings and…stuff he heard/smelled was obviously coming from them. One was crooked up, arching back to blend in with his scythe of hair. The other lay lower, running flat with the rest of his hair.

And now, with Dib becoming an alien, he was going to need a life supporting-Pak as well.

He would need the Pak…but that might be soon, or later, and by then, it might be too late to change himself back…

And he would of course attempt to reverse this. He was NOT going to be an alien! But going to the Swollen Eye was out…they would do to him what he had threatened to do with Zim! His father was another strike-out. He would just experiment on him like had been planning to do to Gaz when she got the pig-curse.

He knew it was an awful thing to think about one's own father, but he couldn't lie about his dad's behavior. If he got discovered by his father, he would not get any help. He will be put into that big glass box that Gaz was put into, and held for tests.

Well! He would worry about how to reverse it in a moment. First things first…he needed to disguise himself. He was not going to let himself get caught because of a stupid mistake like not disguising himself!

But how? He did not have the advance alien Irken technology that Zim did! His father may have something…but he would have to go down to the labs to find out, and that would mean running into his father, and that would be disastrous! No, he needed a temporary disguise until he could find something more efficient down in his father's lab.

"DIB!!" a loud knock sounded on the door.

It was Gaz! Dib began to panic. She could not see him like this, she'll tell dad! Or…she probably won't even notice. If she had her game…then she wouldn't pay any attention…and he could slip past to his room. That could work…

"Are you done yet?" She growled through the door, and Dib gulped. His antenna that was arched like his hair flattened next to the other one subconsciously as he cringed away from his fierce sister's voice.

"I'm done, I'm done! Now…just…back up and turn away so I don't hit you with the door!" He said, and flung the door open and dashed to his room while his sister just stood there with an eyebrow arched.

"You're insane," she muttered, walking in and slamming the door.

Dib panted heavily, leaning against his bedroom door. That was close. Now, to find a temporary disguise…

His right antennae arched back up to what seemed to be its normal position as he paced, thinking deeply on the subject. What could he do? His antennae were easy enough to hide, he just had to keep them close to his hair and they blended in perfectly. His green skin…he could just say he was feeling ill. But his eyes? How would he hide his eyes? He didn't own any contacts…

His eyes widened. The X-scope! The one he had used to catch Zim in the act of stealing the organs of the students! It covered his eyes, and no one would think it strange for him to have them…

Snatching them off his desk, he slipped them on and took off down the stairs, heading to the lab.

Once down there, he walked as quietly as he could towards the shelves that his father stored his various experiments and stuff on.

"Son? What are you doing down here?"

Dib froze in mid-step, his antennae flattening again. Dang, he was caught! He could salvage this, though. His father had told him where the nano-ship was when he needed it; maybe he could save himself a lot of valuable time by having his father point out some sort of thing for him!

He spun around, and hoped his father wouldn't question the scope covering his eyes.

"Hey, dad. I was, uh…looking for a portable holographic projector. Do we have one?" he asked in a rush, barely resisting the urge to reach up and forcefully hold his antennae still as they quirked and quivered to the slightest sound. If they kept this up, they might give him away!

Thankfully, his father did not notice them, but merely walked over to one of his desks and picked up a small, blinking object on a long chain.

"Here you go, son! Now be careful, it's a prototype!"

Dib took it from his father, and eyed it carefully. It was small enough to be able to be secretive and functional.

It was perfect!

"How does it work?" He asked.

"You put a cell sample into the small compartment here," and the professor pointed to a small hatch on the back of the mechanism. "And it will project a flawless, perfect, and utterly convincing image of whatever you had put in there!" he proclaimed triumphantly. When he looked back down, Dib was gone.

"Perfect!" Dib exclaimed excitedly as he ran back up to his room.

Wait…a flaw in his wonderful plan…

It required a cell sample! He couldn't use one of his cell samples, as they were partially Irken now! And that would be worthless, as it would project an image of how Dib was now, which would defeat the purpose.

Ah! A solution! Dib leaped up and ran to the bathroom, digging out his hairbrush. A normal, human-Dib hair would be on the brush…and would be the perfect cell sample!

Pulling free a strand, he carefully placed it in the back of the holographic projector. He placed two fingers on either side of the blinking oval, and pinched, pushing the two buttons that were there.

There was a flash of light, and then a beam of light began to form, and slowly it took the shape of Dib, in his normal human form.

"Perfect," Dib hissed, before blinking and flinching at the…Zim-ness of how he had sounded.

Growling, he placed the holographic projector around his neck, and turned to look at himself in the mirror.

Finally! He looked normal! Wait…normal, human looking eyes narrowed behind holographic glasses as he spotted one of his antennae poking up through the holographic image of himself.

Hmm…a complication. He raised his arms, and the holograph still covered him, mimicking his moves. But his antennae…his hologram did not have them, and so had nothing to cover them with. He'll have to hide them in his hair, but he'll have to find a way to keep them there, since they were apparently prone to moving on their own.

Flattening them in his hair with a conscious force of will, he examined himself in the mirror again. Hmm…fiddling with a few of the small controls, Dib made the hologram mimic his normal clothes, and made the glasses a bit rounder. There! He looked like his human self.

Smirking to himself, he snickered at the thought that he had just made a better disguise with human technology than Zim had with his 'superior' Irken technology.

Ohh, he couldn't wait to see Zim's expression when he entered class looking like normal. Maybe he'll confront Dib and attempt to find out how he did it, and maybe even spill how to reverse the effect for real!

Laughing in victory, he turned to his computer to start some research to see if he couldn't find a possible cure on his own.

-0-0-

End chapter.

Once again, thanks to all reviewers and readers!

Sorry, no big rant for you this time. shrug. Not much to comment on right now. Oh, if you care to see a picture I have drawn of Irk-Dib with his spider legs, go to and search for 'Sirithiliel', and it should be in my gallery.