I am very sorry for the delay. I wish I could tell you that there won't be another but I dealing with some health issues and can't promise the regularity I was previously so proud of. I will try and post at least twice a month. Since we are winding to a stop it shouldn't be so bad...said the spider to the flies.

Thank to Michelle and Jennifer for weeding through my fever addled brain. I know it's not cute in there.

Thank you guys for continuing to even care about this story.

Observation Gil

Gil ate his lunch and dinner in the hotel room. He had gotten some menial work done on his laptop. He also managed to not roll up into a ball and die. He counted that as his greatest victory.

The phone jostled him out of the self pity that had threatened to consume him. Assuming it would be Sara telling him where she would be staying for the next few days, or possibly weeks, he answered the phone quickly, "You made it." The silence he was met with was a millisecond too long, and he began to worry. "Hello?"

"Gil?" The voice was crisp and surprisingly sweet. It was almost as if Sara had cast an incantation that had somehow brought Alana forth.

"Alana," he breathed as he looked out over the ocean and gripped the edge of the bed with his free hand.

Trying to keep the bitterness from her voice, she said, "I assume I'm not who you were expecting."

He moved the phone from one ear to another. "No, you weren't." He tried not to sound cruel. He had already hurt enough people for the day.

"Sorry," Alana replied, her delicate hands starting to sweat a bit. She had hoped he would be alone, but had never really expected it to happen. After all, who went to a romantic island on their own? Certainly not Gil Grissom, the man who preferred rustic mountain top cabins when he wanted to recharge-alone.

She had often wondered about the husky voiced woman who had answered his phone before. The woman had been wary of her, and understandably so. The new girlfriend always knew about the old one. The confidence she had heard in that woman's voice had troubled Alana.

Alana had never completely believed that she and Gil could ever make it. There had always been something dark on their horizon. She'd been on guard for cracks in their relationship, for his roving eyes and his wanderlust.

Nothing in his life had ever seemed to be enough. He never learned enough. Never worked enough. She was never enough; though nearly so.

She had known that it was rude to call and to interrupt his obvious romantic encounter. But when she had seen him at one of their old haunts, she had simply not been able to help herself. There just seemed to be something serendipitous about the near encounter.

She wasn't even sure why she'd come to the island. Maybe it was to remember their time together. Maybe it was to put it all behind her? She couldn't really be sure now. Seeing him after nearly a year abroad, it was all muddled in her brain now.

"How was London?" His voice interrupted her thoughts.

Grateful for the normality of the question, she launched into a dialog about how invigorating the work had been for her. She went on to tell him how much she'd enjoyed her time away, but was glad to have returned. She finished by saying that she'd been able to visit some the great masterpieces during her time off.

"Good for you. I heard good things about the restoration to Nevel."

She smiled. He had been keeping tabs on her. Perhaps? One could only hope. "They seemed pleased." she said lightly. "How have you been, Gil?"

"Very good." It was an honest answer, but it stung her a bit. "You?"

"Fine." she said mildly. Immediately, she regretted her answer. She should have said something more positive to counter his answer. "I've called you a few times."

"So I understand." His voice was gentle. He had hurt enough people already, and Sara had made him promise to talk to Alana. She had been very clear about that.

It was Alana's turn to cut through the moment of silence that time. "I-are you here alone?"

"Actually," he swallowed. "Sa-She went back this morning." He dared not speak Sara's name to Alana. There was something too intimate about it; something that felt a little too much like betrayal.

"I'm here alone," was her response to the unanswered question.

"Oh." Had she imagined that his voice had perked up, or was she lying to herself again where Gil Grissom was concerned?

For his part, Gil saw this as an opportunity. It was an opportunity to see Alana, to put the past behind him, and to gain Sara's trust again. There was also a tiny corner of his brain that wondered why Alana had come there alone, but he resisted the urge to dwell on it. Whatever her reasons were, he would know soon enough.

He clicked on the TV and placed it on mute as he turned to CNN to check the time: eight o'clock. "Why don't we meet for a drink? At O'Mally's in an hour," he asked.

Almost giddy with anticipation, she nearly giggled. "Great. I'll see you there." Before he could respond, she had hung up the phone and dashed to the bathroom to check her appearance.

Sara

Okay, so I had a little breakdown. Alright. I had a big breakdown. But I'm doing much better now. Kelly really is going to be a good mother one day. She listened to me babble on and on, and cry and cry, and she didn't once tell me I was stupid. She just listened to all of it, and gave only her gentle brand of advice.

After I calmed down, I called Gil, but he didn't answer the phone. I'm trying not to make too much of it, but it's...difficult. All kinds of nonsense keeps running through my head. I mean, he said he loved me, and I do believe him. Gil has a lot of faults, but he doesn't lie. He never lies. And when I looked into his eyes just before I left, I could see the hurt there.

I really don't want to hurt him, but we've got to sort through all of this crap. And no matter what he says, Alana is an issue. An issue he's not prepared to deal with. I know a little something about what it's like to bury that stuff until you think it doesn't matter anymore. But it always matters. Just how much is what makes the difference.

For what it's worth…I don't think he's really in love with Alana anymore. But she's still got some kind of a hold on him. Maybe talking to her will finally shake it off.

On top of all the crap with Gil, my period is starting and the cramps are a mother. I thought the pill was supposed to help with this stuff, but I'm still having to deal with it month after month. It's not so bad when Gil is around. He puts a hot water bottle on my belly and starts waxing poetic about biology, and the life giving nature of the womb, and how wondrous it all is. For such a smooth player, he can be so cheesy sometimes.

We haven't talked about kids-exactly, but he's made it pretty clear that he wants some one day. I'm not sure what kind of mother I'd be. But if Gil thinks I'll be a good one, and he'll be around to keep me from doing stupid things, then I'm willing to give it a shot. At least I know what not to do.

Me, with kids, well that's just one of the craziest things I've ever considered. But it all seems strangely possible now. All of this makes me think about my brother. I've been hoping to hear from him. I wonder if he has kids, or if he's married. He's still pretty young, really.

Another roll of pain hits me, making me double over again. So much for the Advil. I roll over and try to get some sleep. I guess it could be worse. I could be pregnant. Wouldn't that be a mess?