Chapter Twenty: Proposal
What a fateful night...
After Patty stormed out of the kitchen on Sunday, she and Penny had gone back to speaking to each other in short, clipped sentences, just as they had after Patty's announcement about Halloween. The only difference this time was that Patty was just as stubbornly refusing to talk.
Surprisingly, though, in the five mornings since that horrible Sunday, Pork had not graced the Halliwell manor with his presence again. For that, at least, Patty was a little bit grateful to her mother. Not grateful enough to converse with her, maybe, but enough to at least be civil.
To cap it all off, ever since her discussion with Cynthia, she had been feeling a little odd about her relationship with Victor. It had only been a month and she already felt as though she were drowning in the emotions she felt for him. She didn't want to be in love with him. She didn't want to even be deeply in like with him. What she really wanted to do was blurt out that she was a witch and watch him run for the door now, instead of later.
Not that it would do any good. As much as she was loathe to admit it, even to herself, she already was in love with Victor, and losing him now wouldn't be any better than losing him later. Deep down, she held on to the illusion that it would hurt less; it had to.
She had practiced telling him one night, in front of the mirror. "Victor, I have something to tell you," she had told her reflection, hands clasped in front of her. "I know this is probably going to sound crazy, but I wanted you to know the truth. I'm a witch with magical powers."
How she pictured Victor's reaction echoed through her mind. A nervous laugh. Asking her to stop kidding around. And then all she'd have to do is grab something nearby, throw it up in the air and freeze it and-
She hadn't let her imagination go further than that. What good would it do?
She was trapped, and it was suffocating her. There were only three choices she could see: run away now and go back to being alone, keep on with the illusion, or tell Victor and let him leave. None of those options seemed appealing.
To top it all off, Victor had been acting oddly all week. He had called, a nervous jitter in his voice, early in the week to ask her out to dinner on Friday, but then avoided her the rest of the week. Which wasn't hard at all, of course, because she was avoiding him to in favor of soul searching. But why, why, was he not being his usual charming self? It bothered her more than she wanted to admit.
And now it was Friday and she was supposed to be getting ready for her dinner with Victor and instead she was lying on her bed, wearing a bathrobe, and feeling nauseous. What am I going to do?
Her mother's voice responded in her mind, as annoying and practical as ever: you're going to get up, dress fabulously, go to dinner, and stop worrying. Patty snorted. Easy for the illusion of her mother's voice to say.
Eventually, though, she managed to do it. She slipped off the bed, picked out an outfit, put on makeup and did her hair, and when all was said and done she looked amazing. Her stomach was still tying itself in knots, though.
What in the world was she going to do?
Victor felt the pocket of his suit jacket for the ring for the hundredth time since leaving his apartment. He was sitting outside Patty's house, car parked, willing the elephants tromping around his stomach to go away. She had to say yes. She had to say yes. What else could she say? No one really said "no" to a proposal, did they?
He swallowed hard and prayed his hands would stop shaking enough to get through the evening.
Without further hesitation he got out of the car and walked up the steps to the front door, knocking loudly and fixing a smile on his face. This night was going to be perfect. Perfect. The door opening, and his smile became genuine as he saw Patty standing in front of him, looking more beautiful than he had ever seen her.
"Hey," he said, unconsciously wiping his sweaty palms against his slacks. "You look wonderful."
Patty ducked her head shyly then gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks," she said. She shifted her purse from one shoulder to the other and for a fleeting second, Victor wondered if she was as nervous as he.
"Are you okay?" he asked. "You seem a little nervous."
She shook her head too quickly and smiled. "Oh, no, just...you know." She shrugged. "I still haven't made up with my mom yet and...well...it's just been a long week."
"Ah, well, tonight will take your mind off of all of that, I guarantee you." He took her hand and squeezed it, then tugged on it, urging her to the car.
"I hope so," she said, and she began to buckle her seatbelt as he shut the door and jaunted over to the driver's side. Perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect, he recited as a mantra in his mind.
The drive to the restaurant was short and uneventful. The conversation had been choppy, on Victor's part because of his nervousness, on Patty's part, he guessed, because of whatever was bothering her. Unfortunately, though, it only served to further unnerve him.
It wasn't until they were seated and Patty was poking at her salad that Victor built up the resolve to make conversation again. Really, though, he was so agitated he just wanted to propose and watch her eyes light up and her smile be genuinely happy.
"So," he said, "I think I'm going to start taking night classes next semester at community college."
"Yeah?" said Patty. "That should be good. You said before you've wanted to for awhile."
Victor nodded, trying to ignore the heaviness of his coat pocket. "It'll be slow going, being only a part-time student, but I think it's worth it. Especially if I'm working at the same time."
"You'll be great," she said. "You've got a head for business."
He hesitated, twirling his salad fork in his fingers and staring down at his salad with a blank expression. "Maybe you could take some classes too," he said, not looking up to meet her eyes. This was such a sensitive topic with her, but she was so intelligent, he couldn't just see her working at Buddy's forever.
She laughed lightly, but it had a hint of edginess to it. "Maybe," she said. "But I'm pretty happy with where my life is right now."
He looked up and watched her stab at her salad, looking positively miserable. "But Patty-"
"Look, Victor," she interrupted, "I know you mean well, but you've only known me a month." She set down her fork and crossed her arms. "I have more in my life than Buddy's."
"I know that!" he said. "You've got me and your friends and your family..." Although you seem to fight with your mom almost as much as I fight with mine...
"Yeah, I do," she said. "And I've got other things too, so just let it go." She sighed. "Between you and Susan, I swear..."
"Jeez, Patty," he said, frustrated with both her and the fact that he was getting snippy on the night he was going to propose. "This is the only time I've brought it up and Susan's not even here most of the year. Don't overreact."
She shook her head and picked up her fork again. "I'm sorry, Victor," she said. "I've just got a lot on my mind."
"Yeah, well, you're not the only one."
For the first time that night she looked at him with genuine interest and puzzlement on her features. "I'm sorry," she said again. "Is something bothering you?"
"No, I..." He shook his head. "Nothing that won't be resolved."
Patty smiled. "Okay, then," she said.
As some sort of peace offering, he assumed, Patty spent the rest of their dinner talking about nothing of great consequence, and making an effort to be pleasant. Still, something was distracting her, and he knew that he still didn't have her full attention.
He had thought out this proposal business as carefully as someone with a rash personality could. Dinner at a fancy restaurant had seemed like a great idea at the time, though he was now wondering if something more casual would have been smarter. Where he planned to propose, the bench they had talked at on their first date, he still hoped would be ideal, though. Romantic and significant and lovely. All requirements that were meant. He bit his lip as he paid the bill, his nerves more jumbled than ever before in his life, and was only calmed slightly when Patty put an arm around his waist on the walk to the car.
Perfect, he thought. It just has to be.
Patty felt horrible for being so short with Victor. He had gone to all the trouble to take her out to a nice, beautiful dinner, and she had been so obsessed with her own issues she had treated him awfully. She'd make it up to him somehow. If she didn't decide to break up with him, of course.
Something was wrong with him tonight, anyway. He had been acting nervous and rigid all evening, constantly touching the pocket of his coat and jiggling his hands and legs. He also kept tugging at his earlobe, a clear sign he was agitated. It couldn't just be at her behavior, could it?
"So, where are we?" she asked as he opened her car door and helped her out. She wrapped an arm around his waist again and he draped his over her shoulders. They walked toward a bench and Victor stopped in front of it, smiling down at her.
"Recognize it?"
Patty glanced down, momentarily puzzled, and then it came rushing back to her. It was that bench from their hot dog date. Their first date.
"Oh!" she said. She grinned and squeezed her arm a little more tightly around him, but he didn't respond. Instead he pulled his arm away and moved to stand in front of her, taking both of her hands in his and swinging them.
She smiled nervously. "What's going on, Victor?"
He smiled back and squeezed her left hand a couple of times.
"Victor?"
He cleared his throat. "Look, uh, Patty, I love you."
Patty's mouth fell open in shock. What...how...what?
"I love you," he said again, more confidently. "I've never felt this way about anyone else. I loved you the second I saw you and I know I'll love you until the day I die. I can't imagine my life without you."
Oh, God, she thought. Oh, oh no...
Victor sank to one knee, still holding her left hand, and fumbled awkwardly to pull a little box out of his coat pocket. With a little effort he opened it and held it out to her. "Patricia Halliwell," he said, "will you marry me?"
Patty swallowed hard and tried unsuccessfully to breath. Without thinking, she froze Victor with her right hand, and extracted her left from his, pacing back in forth in front of the bench in pure, unadulterated panic.
"What are you thinking?" she yelled at him. "We've only dated for a month, and I'm only nineteen, and I'm a witch and you don't even know it! We can't get married! Are you insane?"
Victor, of course, didn't answer, but simply kneeled there, hope and love shining in his frozen expression.
Patty sank onto the bench and buried her head in her hands. "Oh, Victor," she said. Without thinking her eyes welled up and she knew she was going to cry. This was so unfair. Why couldn't she just be normal? Why couldn't she just be happy that her boyfriend, whom she loved, was proposing to her and wanted to be with her the rest of her life?
She swiped at her eyes, her makeup smearing across her face and stood, forcing her hand back into his and unfreezing him. His expression instantly changed from hopeful to concerned as he looked up at her face, and somewhere in the back of her mind she knew it had to be odd to him that her expression had changed instantly.
"Patty-"
"Victor," she said, choking, "I can't. We can't."
"What? Patty, why?" he said, scrambling to his feet as she backed away from him.
"Because!" she said. "I...it's just...we can't!"
He threw up a hand and began to pace, the anger emanating from his entire body. "That's bullshit, Patty!" he yelled. "I want to know why. What's wrong with you tonight?"
She shook her head, wildly, turning away from him, trying to disconnect. After all of her concern and worry, this was how it would end. She swallowed hard. "I'm sorry," she said. And she ran away, not turning to see Victor's response.