-1I'm sorry that it took so long for me to continue, my gradfather passed on November 9th and we found out about it on the 12th so I had to take a little time to cope with things, even though we all knew it was going to happen, the doctors told us three to six months and here it was less then 2 weeks later and he was gone… But I'm alright now and so I shall continue…
Rosebud
Bar Fights and Bullets
Chapter 2
Sam helped his brother to bed before taking the small orange bottle of tranquilizers off of the night stand and opening it holding out two pills in his direction, "Here."
"I know the routine." Dean quipped and swallowed them down dry; "Thanks."
Sam nodded and pulled the blanket up for him before exiting the room, "I'll see you in the morning."
"I'll be here.."
"Or on the floor." Sam's voice almost sounded annoyed.
"Yeah, yeah, shut up."
Rubbing his hand over his chin, Sam exited his brothers room and closed the door making his way out to the sofa and sat down…
He knew by now that it was going to take exactly seventeen minutes for the tranquilizers to take effect and for his brother to fall into a dreamless, cold slumber, the only way his was able to get any rest at all these days without plaguing nightmares, and waking up in a cold sweat…
Memories of his 'accident' consuming his thoughts and making there way into his dreams.
Fingering his way through the latest issue of TV Guide Sam kept a close eye on the clock watching as the next seventeen minutes seemed to take years to pass by, he himself was completely exhausted, so tired his eyelids refused to fully open anymore, but there were still things that needed to be done, that he could not do while Dean was awake…
So finally as the clock struck one forty eight, Sam rose to his feet and tip toed to his brothers room carefully opening the door and peering into the darkness… Dean was asleep his arm tossed over his eyes, just as Sam knew he would be.
Quieter than a mouse in church the younger Winchester brother made his way toward Dean's bed and knelt down at the end of it carefully pulling the comforter off of his legs….
Sam swallowed down a gag, just as he always did, taking note of the small deteriorating legs before him, legs that less than four months ago were strong and powerful… muscular but were now weak and lifeless… like an infants.
He kneeled down and took the left first massaging it all the way from the tip of his toes to the ball of his heal and then as far up as his arms could reach before working his way down again…
He lifted it into the air and then back toward the bed, repeating this motion quite a few times before beginning to imitate a walking motion, bending at the knee and straightening it again over and over…
Dean never so much as stirred, he never did, why would he, as long as Sam was silent his brother would never even know he was there, he couldn't feel a thing from exactly six point four inches above his waist where the first bullet had entered his spine, to the tip of his toes, complete total paralysis… With only a four percent hope of recovery…
Sam had held on to that four percent hope for so long after the doctors had informed him of his brothers condition, he tried as hard as he could to be optimistic about it, after all this was Dean, his older brother, his hero… He was going to be just fine, he had to be alright…
But as time passed and reality set in, Sam knew his hopes were those of a fool and that Dean, the Dean he knew was never going to be returning again….
Even now, as he kneel here before his brothers sleeping form in the darkness a limp leg in his grasp. Even now as he made his way through the motions of physical therapy he had forced himself to learn, even now as he felt the small, weak muscles working there way through his fingers… His heart bled, hopeless and helpless.
When Dean was awake, Sam refused to let him see this side of him through, refused to let him know how little he believed in a recovery, and just how accepting he had become of the consequences for his actions….
But Dean, he knew Dean was not stupid, his brother had always been able to read him like a book, and he knew that Dean knew how he felt, from the guilt and the pain to the hopelessness that now resided in his heart… Bu it didn't stop his baby brother from trying to hide it from him, from trying to mask it with whatever emotion he could find….
And Sam had the right idea, avoid the subject at all costs, never talk about it… Never discuss reality, and maybe someday it will go away…
Rising to his feet, Sam replaced the blanket over his brothers legs and walked to the nightstand taking two pills for himself from the small bottle, after all Dean wasn't the only one having nightmares these days….
3 Months 11 days and 6 hours earlier
Sam looked down at the wad of 20's in his grasp and smirked making his way back toward his brother who was sitting on the same barstool he had been three hours earlier when this whole façade had started, a pleased look written across his face….
"What did I tell you Sammy boy? It's as easy as pie…"
"Yeah, can we uh get out of here now though? I think I pissed them off…" He mumbled handing over half of the twenties in his grasp to Dean and finishing off the last of his second beer placing the empty glass on the bar top.
"Relax man, what's the worse they are going to do? Beat you with their trucker hats?"
Sam looked over his shoulder at the two angry men glaring back at him, both of them gripping there pool sticks in the same death grip manner. "I guess, your right…"
"I'm always right, now have another beer… It's on them " Dean chuckled fallowing Sam's gaze to the two men.
"You know Dean…" Sam looked to his brother retaking his seat next to him, "One of these days our luck in the whole hustling business is going to run out… And then what are we going to do?"
"So negative little brother…"
"I'm serious man…"
"Then, then we'll uh… Take up a demon hunter collections fund?"
"Funny…"
"Shut up, stop worrying and drink your beer."
Sam shook his head and did as he was told pretty sure that this was not the right time nor place to be having this conversation anyway considering his had just hustled over two hundred dollars out of dumb and dumber over there.
"Hey Pretty boy." Both Sam and Dean turned around only moments later to see the two truckers, whose names were Al and Bob approaching them. Al was shorter then Bob, but what he lacked in height he sure as hell made up for in width…
"Who me?" Sam tried his best to look innocent as he pointed to his chest and cleared his throat.
"Yeah you, Al and I have decided that we want our money back…."
"Yeah… We think we've been had…"
"Sorry there boys, better luck next time, there's a no refund policy around here." Dean smarted off pointing to the NO REFUND sign hanging above the bar.
"Well give us a chance to make it back then…"
"You sure you want to take that risk boys…" Sam stood and popped his knuckles before stretching.
"there's no threat see…" Al took a step in closer, close enough now that Sam could feel the quite ripe smelling man's breath hot on his neck his finger digging into his chest. "You're going to lose…"
Dean was to his feet in a matter of seconds the bar stool wobbling as he jumped up. "You wanna take a step back there Cledus?"
"You stay outta this one…" Bob grunted, "He's just given your boyfriend here a little talking to, that's all making sure he understands the rules."
Dean's lips turned into an evil and defying smirk as he nodded, "Alright…" His blood was boiling with anger and he brought his fist back swiftly before throwing it into the hefty man's jaw.
Bob teetered like humpty dumpy, but unlike humpty dumpty he did not fall down… He staggered a few feet back and gripped his jaw, his eyes looking into Dean and burning with anger… "Your gonna pay for that one."
"I'm scared." Dean took a fighting stance using his fingers to signal for him to come on.
Sam groaned watching the last few seconds unfold and letting his gaze fall to the over sized man in front of him, I guess this meant it was fight time.
His shoulders shrugged and he brought his own fist back before sending it piloting forward toward Al's face. "I hate fighting." He called out in Dean's general direction his brother now pinned against the bar by Bob's stomach the large man's hand around his neck…
Dean reached for the empty glass still on the bar top and swung it over the man's head causing him to immediately stumble and let go of the hold he had on Dean's neck.
"I know, I know… But just remember you brought this one on yourself man, I was nearly innocent…"
"Nearly…" Sam mumbled under his breath taking another swing as Al lunged toward him, a crowd now having gathered around the four fighting figures….
Present Day
The sun was bright and nearly nauseating as it peered in through Sam's window as his alarm went off… Bare Naked Ladies One Week blaring through his ears….
Swinging his arm over he pounded on the off button and grunted loudly sitting up and stretching, "What a welcoming song to wake-up to… That's what I get to have stuck in my head all morning??? .." He rose to his feet and slipped his sweatpants on over his boxers, "Fabulous."
Rolling his neck from side to side he made his way out of his room and to Dean's, opening the door and sticking his head in…
He was pleasantly surprised to find his brother still laying in bed reading a copy of Hustler magazine he kept under his pillow to keep himself entertained.
"You're up." He stepped the rest of the way in,
"Yes Dad, and I even waited for you to come and carry me… like a good boy."
Sam sighed and shook his head, "I know I'm surprised…"
"Well I figured I gave you enough trouble yesterday… So maybe tomorrow…."
"Thanks…."
-After breakfast and the dishes were done Sam made his way toward the small front room of their living quarters and stood in the door way Dean was doing the same thing he did everyday sitting in front of the television ignoring reality and losing himself in some horrible game show he found on one of their stolen cable channels.
"You know there was a time when you hated day time tv… Remember that?"
"Yeah well maybe I should go for a nice jog instead eh?"
"Funny…" Sam exhaled defeated, "I'm gonna go take a shower, is there anything you need first?"
"I'm cool a cat…" Dean retorted dryly turning back to his program,
15 minutes to himself…. 15 minutes of pleasure, Sam relished his morning showers because for 15 minutes nothing and no one was going to bother him… And of course for that same reason he feared them as well… What ifs would plague him from the moment the water started until it stopped again… What if Dean needed something, what if Dean called for him, what if Dean….
He stripped his clothes off and turned the hot water on as far as it would go before climbing in , the steam from the temperature quickly engulfing him, he welcomed every hot stinging droplet against his flesh as he closed his eyes and kept them closed, relaxed almost instantly.
As the next commercial break hit Dean grunted his throat exceedingly dry from the burnt toast and bacon of the mornings breakfast, leaning down he released the break on his chair and made his way toward the kitchen….
Pulling up to the sink he noticed that the small drain board was cleared out, the sink was empty… His head tilted up looking at the cupboard, far out of his reach….
"Damn-it…" He growled loudly and ran a hand through his hair,
He looked toward the still closed bathroom door and swallowed, he should wait for Sam, he should be out in a few minutes,… He could get him a cup… And the water too if he just asked for it….
Dean shook his head defiantly, "What am I a child? I can do this…" He snarled and leaned down putting the brake on once more…
He ignored the trembling of his hands as he undid his own seat belt and leaned down removing the straps from his legs and sliding them off there holders moving the small peddle like objects out of the way with his hands.
He inhaled and then exhaled loudly looking up once more, all he would have to do is balance himself on the counter top long enough to reach up with one hand and get the damn cup
"Piece of cake.." He groaned and put his hands on the counter his arm muscles thankfully still stronger then ever….
"One…. Two.. Three…" He whispered to himself before pushing himself up on his arms and out of his confinements…
"Shit…." He could feel the burn in his arms beads of sweat forming instantly on his forehead….. His lower body dangling like a weed below him as he looked down his eyes catching sight of his legs "Useless, Damn useless pieces of shit…" He growled and then tilted his head back up to focus on the task at hand….
Suddenly he was more thirsty then ever….
He nearly jumped, or he would have if he wasn't concentrating so hard on the task at hand when he heard the sound of his wheelchair toppling over, he figured he must have only been out of it for a few seconds, even though it felt like hours had passed, and the force of him pulling himself up had somehow knocked it over.
"DAMN-IT" He cursed breathing heavily.
What the hell was he supposed to do now? He felt the sweat pouring from his hands making his grip slipperier then ever he was going to hit the ground, hard… probably smash into the metal hell beast below him and break a few limbs while he was at it…. And there was nothing he could do about it…. No way he could stop it….
Hearing the commotion Sam shut the water off and listened carefully for a minute before stepping out and sliding his boxers back on to his soaking wet body he opened the bathroom door and shock filled his body at the sight before him, dean dangling like a rag doll from their kitchen counter top even from there Sam could see the sweat bathing him, his body slowly slipping….He darted forward and across the kitchen in less than a second he was standing behind his brother his arms wrapped around his waist…
Dean had just let go his body falling toward the ground when he felt strong arms around his body keeping him up right and he knew who it was who it had to be….
"What the hell do you think you are doing?" Sam's voice was angry as he struggled to keep them both up. His slippery wet flesh making it all the more difficult.
"Let go of me." Dean's voice was hard , and just as angry…
"What Are you doing?" Sam repeated holding the helpless man in his grip.
"It doesn't matter alright… NOW LET GO!"
"No! What are you crazy?! You could of hurt yourself."
"Good."
"Dean…" Sam lowered his voice a little…
"You should of left me be…."
"That's never going to happen…I'm here and I'm not going anywhere else until we get you back on your feet again.,…"
"Yeah…. Right…."