Chaper – 8 Meetings
Number 12 Grimmauld Place came into existence before Harry's eyes after the initial disorientation of apparating side-along with Lupin. The sight was bittersweet as memories of time spent with Sirius and the others were jogged by seeing the familiar battered door and grimy windows. Its ragtag appearance reminded Harry of the dementor's rotting cloaks. Shuttering he had never wanted to come back here, yet now he was. Catching Lupin's eyes, he noticed how they glistened in the setting rays of the sun just the smallest amount; Harry realized that he wasn't alone in his regrets.
Quietly he walked with the others towards the entrance, knowing that it was dangerous to be out in the open like this. He felt strangely agoraphobic nowadays, almost like being a hunted animal. He wondered how long Sirius had felt like this and finally appreciated how depressing this house must have been in order to make him desire to flee into back into it. Harry softly swore to himself that this was just a stop, he wasn't staying. He wasn't going to let this place suck his soul.
Upon reaching the doorway Moody motioned to Harry to keep quiet and knocked quietly on the door. Just moments later the door silently clicked open and all of them filed in a darkened hallway. Still not making any noise they crept past the picture of Sirius' mother. Even though there was a heavy cloth draped over it, he could hear the slight moaning of Mrs. Black on the other side, "Oh why has this dreadful thing happened to us? To have so many filthy degenerates living in my house and desecrating our family's noble linage. What did we ever do to deserve this shameful treatment?"
Stealthily they made their way to the study, across from the stairway. Harry had hoped to actually go to the kitchen first, realizing that he hadn't eaten in probably a day and a half or more and was famished. Closing the door behind them, Moody pointed his wand at it and said, "Imperturbatus." The brief flash of light told Harry that they could finally talk. "Where is everybody?" was the first question Harry asked. He had expected throngs of wizards busily coordinating their offensive against Voldemort. The muggle movies portrayed command centers as a beehive of activity, yet this house stood silent, gravelike.
Shamefully, the members of the Order of the Pheonix, momentarily averted their eyes. "The wars not going well for us." Admitted Moody. "We've lost a couple to Death Eater's, but the biggest culprit so far has been fear."
Nodding appreciably, Harry kept silent.
Lupin started next, "The Order is not what it once was after Dumbledore was killed. Wizards stopped believing that they could do anything, that the best thing to do was keep low and wait for it to blow over. That's one problem with living so long, everybody believes that the pendulum will swing the other way eventually regardless of what they do."
"That's not what Dumbledore taught us!" said Harry bitterly
"We know, we know." Tonks now offered up. "Those of us who were fortunately to be close enough to him understand this, but most don't and want to protect their own."
"Surest way to a quick death, " grumbled Moody. "Voldemort is just as likely to kill a pureblood as a half blood as a squib as a muggle. Killing is all he cares about."
"You're wrong about that Moody." said Harry dispensing with any formality. "Voldemort once told me that there is no good and evil, there is only power...and those too weak to seek it'. He doesn't care about killing someone any more that you care about killing a flea. He has gone too from being human and now only thinks about making himself more powerful. Killing gives him power; his Death Eaters see that and emulate it thinking it will do the same for them."
While talking the door had opened and Harry heard Mrs. Weasley's voice call out, "They found you! We were so worried about you! Are you ok? Are you hurt?" While rushing through these and a dozen questions about his health, Mrs. Weasley enclosed him in a deep welcoming embrace.
Allowing himself to sink into the moment Harry thought, "If there truly is anything called home, this is it."
"Though I am kinda hungry." Harry said once Mrs. Weasley released him enough to breath.
She shot an accusatory glance to the others standing in the study of which only Moody was able to withstand, before shaking him gently and pulling him towards the kitchen. "We must get you something to eat right now then." She insisted. "Tonks, Hestia please go into the pantry and bring up some of those roasts we have."
Not wanting to disobey, but feeling rather put out that she had to do the "women's work" and get dinner ready, Tonks punched Lupin hard in the arm as she walked and narrowed her gaze on Moody. Who only half smiled with is crooked mouth. Just then Mrs Weasley added, "This place is a mess, Moody clear off the table and clean the dishes."
Moody was stuck watching Tonks' ever widening smile, lowered his head and answered, "Yes Molly, I'll be right in." Keeping his back turned he could distinctly hear Hestia and Tonks sniggering to eachother as they left to get the evening's meal.
The break suited Harry who really was extremely hungry. During the meal, everybody started getting Harry up to speed on the events following Dumbledore's murder. The conversation was at such a clip that all he caught was snippets while eating.
"Everyone's terrified that Death Eaters will jump out from behind every bush…"
"Any wonder why, they often do…"
"… Scrimgeour is under a huge amount of pressure to do something…"
"… and Gringotts was attacked twice this month; they're talking about closing their doors…"
"… Diagon alley is empty nowadays, except for Fred and George that is…"
Harry, picked up all sorts of gossip over the next hour about the wizarding world. In the intervening next couple of hours a number of wizards and witches showing up asking what had happened and if he was ok. The word was getting around that he was safe and those members of the Order who were still active waned to see him. Professor McGonagall showed at 11:00 p.m. and expressed how relived she was to see him safe. While that may be true, it was immediately obvious to him and the others in the room that she was very distracted and almost didn't want to be there.
Almost an hour later, Harry was shocked to see Ron and Hermione excitedly bursting through the door to the kitchen. Hermione immediately drew him into a huge hug while Ron stood there slapping him on the back saying how great it was to see him.
"Man you had us worried! We thought for sure that he had gotten you and… ", but Ron stopped before saying what was on their minds when he saw Hermione tearing up and getting ready to cry.
"We were so scared that Voldemort had killed you." Choked out Hermione.
Voldemorts name caught everybody's attention and the room went quiet. After a moments silence Mrs. Weasley unexpectedly interjected, "Guess what Harry? We have a bit of a surprise for you."
Blankly looking back at her, he couldn't imagine what it was.
"Happy Birthday Harry!" she said quite loudly while brandishing an incredibly delicious looking chocolate cake. On it was large candle in the shape of the number seventeen burning brightly while seventeen miniature Quidditich players zoomed around, tossing a quaffle amongst them.
Laughing, he realized that it had completely slipped his mind after his abduction two days ago. He cheerfully accepted the well wishing of all who were there and furthered enjoyed doling out the cake. He had never had a birthday party before and couldn't imagine a greater gift.
After quite a while of talking and catching up with his best friends, Moody moved up to him and said, "Well Potter it is time for your birthday spell."
"Oh yeah, that's right, I can legally cast magic now. What do you think it should be?" Harry gushed as he pulled out his wand.
He looked around to find a far greater solemnity than was present just a moment ago. "Whats the matter?" asked Harry.
"You don't know do you." answered Ron for the rest of the group, " I suppose it comes from not growing up in a wizarding family, but the first spell you cast after coming of age is special. From now on whenever you cast it will never fail you. The trick is, if you cast it wrong, it will never work for you again."
"That and Harry its kind of a secret thing. We aren't supposed to know what it is. I guess it comes from wizards not wanting to be embarrassed if it fails. Anyway, you should take a moment and go into the other room." Hermione followed up.
The room full of people eagerly watched Harry as he exited into the hallway. Standing there in the partial darkness he thought of the hundreds of spells he had tried over the years. For each and every one of them he thought how beneficial it would be as his birthday spell. He weighed each one against the other. Can't be too weak or it's not worth it and it can't be too powerful or I might goof it up. Then with a dawning insight, one spell stood clear from the rest.
In the kitchen, the conversation had picked up again as they speculated on what spell Harry would choose and the ones they wished they had used themselves. When all of a sudden a loud crashing noise came from the other room and they rushed out to see what was going on. It was at that moment Mrs. Black's voice rang out from behind the sheet, shouting with all her ability, "YOU FILTHY HALF-BREEDS DISHONOR AND BETRAY ALL THAT WAS NOBEL IN OUR WORLD!!"
Despite the distraction that Mrs. Black's string of invectives was, they looked desperately for Harry, which was complicated by the darkness of the hallway. Fairly quickly they found Harry head over heals and tangled up in an old chair. This situation was all the more disconcerting because the chair was attempting to eat Harry.
Lupin correctly assessed that it was yet another item enchanted with dark magic that had either been left by the Blacks or possibly created by Ketcher when he was the house elf at Number 12 Grimmauld Place. Lupin shouted "Reducto" and pointing his wand at the chair, destroying it in a single blast. Several wizards started trying to quiet Mrs. Black again as the others helped Harry back into the kitchen.
He sat dazed for a moment and finally said, "Well I guess that was a bad idea."
Not wanting to pursue it, the group decided that it was probably late enough and that they should be leaving. Embarrassed Harry wished each of them a good evening as they left. Soon it was just the three of them left. Mrs. Weasley had humphed loudly she found out that Hermione was staying with Ron and Harry alone, but they were all of age now and no longer needed her permission. Instead she and Moody indicated that they would be by early tomorrow, very early tomorrow, to discuss some things.
Harry sensed that Ron and Hermione wanted to talk about the events of the last few months and what they were going to do. However exhaustion was taking over and he wished them a good night. Climbing the stairs, Harry headed for his old room, but as he approached the door to the master bedroom opened beckoningly. He was struck by the thought that it was his room now, the master of this house. He felt very uncomfortable with the thought, but that didn't change the fact that the house recognized him as such. Not wanting to deal with any more mysteries tonight, Harry made his way to the bed and fell fast asleep.
- - -
Harry awoke the next morning feeling refreshed. The cake and the camaraderie were good for him. Even in the light of day, there was a gloom. It was extremely large and the bed was more comfortable than he would have expected. That is where the positive aspects ended. The rest of the room would have been perfect had he been in a gothic vampire film. It had dark curtains that hung on the edges of the bed and an old, very dark carpeting that communicated no warmth what so ever. All the light fixtures were shaped like snakes and a number of small silver panels on the walls had been etched with the same motif. With a sense of foreboding Harry crawled out of bed to find the bathroom. It was little better, with the only redeeming feature being that it had a hot shower. Surprising there was a single, almost modern, feature in the master bedroom. As Harry opened a door just to the right of the bathroom it opened up into a room about the ten feet on each side. Looking around he realized that this was once used as a practice room. He didn't know if Sirius had used it as such, but one of the former owners did. He poked around and found a human shaped dummy that looked as if every spell in the book had been cast against it.
Trying a few of his own, he discovered that the dummy couldn't be caught on fire, or frozen, or even blown up using the same spell that had saved him last night. Instead, Harry found a hook in the ceiling and hung it from it. Harry started punching the bag in the same way that Dudley had shown him. Moving back and froth, it occurred to Harry that he could actually enchant a speed bag and some other equipment to help him workout. Continuing on for the better part of an hour, Harry finally went back to the bathroom and took a hot shower.
All he had was the clothes he arrived with, so he put them back on, intending to go out to get some new ones that day. On the way down the stairs he heard the soft tapping of someone at the door. Remembering the portrait, he opened the door to discover a goodly number of the Order had just arrived, to include Mr. and Mrs Weasley, Moody, McGonagall, Lupin, Tonks, Arabella Figg, and a few others he did not recognize. Two stood out in his mind. The first was a middle aged man who carried himself as if he had quite a bit of wealth and liked people knowing it. The second was an attractive witch who was wearing turquoise robes.
The all made their way back to the study only to find both Ron and Hermione reading a massive text they had found in the library.
Once they were all in the room and the door was closed, Professor McGonagall tapped her wand on a oaken table that sat in the middle of the room and the members had arranged themselves around as if she was calling a class to attention. She then said in her professor's voice "The Order of the Pheonix is dedicated to stopping Volde… Voldemort. It was Albus' great work to free the world of his evil and we will continue on in his stead. This day I would like to offer membership to Ronald Weasley (a slight gasp could be heard from Mrs. Weasley upon hearing her son's name), Hermione Granger, and Harry Potter. It was one of Albus' last wishes to do so." As Professor McGonagall said this an odd, pinched look came over her face as if an uncomfortable remembrance had come to mind. Member's agreeing please say yes." Concluding she scanned the room and watched as all the members' started motion an affirmative.
Before the tally could actually be made, Harry stood up and asked, "Excuse me Minerva, but what if we don't want to join the Order of the Phoenix?"
The entire room was taken aback at his question, even Ron and Hermione hadn't expected this.
"What do you mean Potter?" interjected Moody "Are you going to cut and run like the rest?"
Minerva almost on top of Moody also said, "It is what Albus wanted. He told me so last year."
Tonks pleaded, "But you have to Harry, it is what we have all been waiting for."
Hestia placed her head in her hands as was rocking back and forth slightly.
Even Hermione and Ron whispered, "But Harry…"
Raising his had to quiet down the meeting, Harry proceeded to say, "I suspect there are a number of agendas in this room. Minerva wants us to continue marching along Dumbledore's path, Moody wants to attack, and some of you believe that I am destined to defeat Voldemort in battle. All those may be good reasons you would want me to join, but they are not good enough for me to join. Let me be clear and unequivocal on this point, I can't defeat Voldemort."
The room erupted into a cacophony of assertions that he was wrong or under estimated himself or one even one members offering that they were all doomed. Ron and Hermione had turned their eyes from the group in apparent shame. Watching this continue for a while, Moody eventually slammed his fist down hard onto the table and shouted "Coward!! How many have died protecting you and now you are going to give up?!"
Assuming, the disarming calm that Dr. Randels seemed to exude, Harry stared directly back into Moody's eyes and said, "Oh you are quite mistaken about us giving up Moody. Ron, Hermione, and I leave to confront Voldemort immediately following Bill and Fleur's wedding (again Mrs. Weasley gasped). In the three weeks before that happens we have a tremendous amount of work to do and I can't see how we would do you any good in that time. In fact it might expose us to secrets that we just shouldn't have. Regardless, I can't see the Order lasting that much longer anyway. With Dumbledore's murder your center is gone and who will pick it up? "
Walking around the group seated at the table Harry proceeded to say, "Dumbledore is dead for one reason, that I failed him." A goodly number of the members objected to this and said that he shouldn't take this responsibility. Again signally that he had more to say, Harry continued by saying, "I have come to terms with the shame of this, but that doesn't negate the central fact that had I continued the DA, Dumbledore would be alive. So to answer your question Moody, that is when I gave up, not now." He let the weight of his admission sink in to the group.
"Look around and what do you see, an increasingly small number of valiant wizards fighting the good fight. I ask you, who amongst you actually knew what Dumbledore's real plans were?" Wide eyed and giving Harry her complete attention, this conversation seemed to have special meaning for McGonagall. In fact her manner had already changed from when she had arrived slightly stooped and introspective, to a more erect posture and bolder countenance.
Not receiving a single coherent response from the group Harry hammered his point home by raising his voice and saying, "If we fight this war Dumbledore's way we will lose, just as he did."
At this point Harry had finished his speech and ended up standing behind his chair. Griping it in his hands, Harry took one deep breath and announced, "As master of this house I hereby revolk the previous offer to the Order of the Phoenix to serve as its headquarters. Instead, I present an alternative for any of those who wish to live in a world without Voldemort, Death Eaters, or even Dark Wizards." Stepping back from the chair Harry peered deeply into each of the stunned faces looking back at him.
"Stand before me and say Voldemort's name without hesitation and become a member of Dumbledore's Army, Order of the Stag Division."