Konoha New York
Chapter 8: Gaara the Explara
New shit by Madara o.o;
Ayame, Kage, Mina, BT, SC, and whoever else read this.
Sorry this took so long. I had some stuff to do and all that and also my sister hogs the computer a lot. x.x
This chapter sucks ass. x.x;
I rushed on it a bit and it didn't come out that good. Not as good as 7, 3, and 4 (my favorite chapters). Maybe even worse than the beginning. I know the plane scene sucks. I'm SORRY. X.x It was hard. A bit of writers block, meh. x.o
Srsly.
So I hope you all like it nevertheless. I'll see if 9 will come out better.
AND NOW WHAT YOU HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR. o.o particularly the poeple in my school who read it, and my other friends
KNY CH. 8.
GAARA THE EXPLARA
Kimi: WHICH I WILL NOT BE IN. -.- yet again
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It was yet ANOTHER peaceful morning in the city of...Konoha New york! Meanwhile in Konoha Zoo, our sweet-Gaara-sama-kun was standing in front of a crocodile display, complete with a gourd on his back and a soda with one of those plastic giraffe heads for the top of the cup...yeah. It was for Shukaku... In the background, there was a brown-haired woman being attacked by crocodiles, cursing and swearing to the heavens.
"Good evening...my name is Gaara. And this is my pet retarded-fish-frog-raccoon thingy: Kicks."
"DAMN RIGHT!" Shukaku was wearing a pain of white Nikes with a green check thingy. "WE ACTUALLY MADE IT TO THE EIGHT CHAPTER!"
(note from the author: I forgot what they are called. x.x)
"Can you find Kicks?" The red-haired male asked nobody in particular.
"Nobody else can see me BUT YOU, retard..."
At that point what seemed like a mouse arrow floated over to Shukaku and clicked on his eye, causing a stab of pain. "OW!"
"There he is." Gaara then wandered over the alligator pit and stepped inside, avoiding the crocodile and stepping to the trainer. "Mom...do you need me to explore?"
"Talk to me again and you'll be in a world of pain." Karura was covered in bruises and alligator bites. "Get me a box of twinkies. Can you do it?"
"HELL NO
I mean...yes we can..." Gaara turned to the reader of this fic (aka you) "Gourdy has the map. Normally, I can just take the map out but I'm in an explaring mood today. Therefore you must do it for me. OR ELSE. To read the map, yell map."
At this point, you should be yelling out "MAP" to the computer screen. For the people who are not yelling map, yell map. You BETTER be yelling map. For Gaara's sake AND (insert-your-favorite-character-here) If you don't yell map, you may be causing the death of someone. Yes. The next person who's ringing your doorbell could be your favorite Naruto character on the verge of dying because either someone stabbed him...you didn't yell map. k? o.o
Gaara paused for a few moments, then yelled again. "LOUDER!!!!"
Yell map again. Maybe Gaara will shut up and get with the point...or not. Gaara emptied his gourd and dug through the sand in search of a map. When he couldn't find it, he asked his inner demon. "Kicks, did you take the map?"
"Who me? Yes me! Couldn't be! Then who?
Yeah I did it. T.T"
"Where is he?"
Shukaku laughed evilly and pointed to a burnt piece of paper, which appeared to be dead.
Gaara blinked in shock for a few minutes then regained his voice. "MAAAAP!"
"
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Raymond was washing in the shower washing his oh-so-perfect kazekage hair. He grabbed a bottle of Suave shampoo and squeezed it onto the palm of his hand, then ran it through his hair.
"I'm going to become Akatsuki leader...one day...I will...
"I am Marcus, honorable Akatsuki leader. I would like to give the title to an honorable man...a man like no other, one who knows what he's doing. May I present to you THE finest man I've ever met, Raymond!"
"Thank you, thank you." Raymond stepped onto the podium.
"My name is Raymond and I have been pondered to be in the Akatsuki for 20 years."
/applause/
"Now I'm here to let you know that I will no longer be JUST the Kazekage. I WILL be Akatsuki leader. Because the AKATSUKI doesn't rule me...
Ray threw his fist in the air. "I rule the AKATSUKI."
"My thought of being with two idiots day-by-day is now vanquished. I have captured every bijuu and dinished every jinchuriki in the world. Now I will conclude this speech by inviting you all to a restaurant for you to have a taste of my succulent, medium-rare-
TWINKIE!"
Raymond jumped in the shower as someone was hushing another person in the bathroom, then a few giggles. The Kazekage turned off his shower and stuck his head out of the shower curtains only to see Chiyo sitting on the toilet while Yashamaru was on the floor playing with a box of twinkies. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO DOING IN HERE?"
"HI RAY!"
"...guys, leave the room now..."
"Awwww." Chiyo got that sad little girl look on her face while Yashamaru shrugged and ate a twinkie. "Why?"
"I'm NAKED in the SHOWER."
Chiyo waved her hand at the former kazekage. "Don't worry I'm almost done!"
"Lord. These people are ethnically challenged." Raymond said to the sky. He then turned to Yashamaru and Chiyo. "Did you guys know that I AM Suna's kazekage?"
"whatever." The two just nodded and continued with their activities as Raymond sighed and crawled back into his happy place in the shower. "I hate those people. This is much worse than the time I took Kankuro and Temari to Princess Di's castle.
"KANKURO! KANKURO! LET'S PLAY NASA!" 7-year-old Temari jumped up and down at her brother in excitement. "oh my god!"
"YAAAY! I'M BUZZ ADAMS!"
"I'm Nasa!" Temari claimed her character and sat on the laundry basket. "NASA to The Challenger! T minus 10 seconds! Engine Turbines ready?"
"Ready!" Kankuro put on a wastebasket on his head as if it were an astronaut helmet, then sat down in the bathtub. "30 seconds to Mars!"
"10...9...8..." Temari counted down as she concentrated chakra into her hands and lifted the bathtub up into the air, then carried it onto the rooftop.
Downstairs outside, Ray and Princess Di were schmoozing, Ray with his british accent. "Well, Princess...I AM Kazekage of Sunagakura, hahaha..."
"Oh how charming."
"Hi daddy!" Temari was tipping the bathtub over the roof while calling out to her father.
Ray's face turned shocked. "TEMARI! KANKURO! GET YOUR ASSES DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!!!"
Kankuro climbed out of the bathtub just as it was about to tip over. "Abort! Abort!"
/shatter/
"NOOOO!!!!" Ray and the princess were crying as the bathrub broke into a million tiny pieces, Kankuro and Temari giving each other a high 5.
"Lord. Why am I surrounded by these people? " Ray spoke up to the heavens as he bathed himself regardless of his friends in the room.
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At a certain-somebody's-living-room, the NEJI huddled around in their secret room of...NEJIness. Everyone was wearing an outfit identical to the Hyuga Cadet Branch prodigy's in some way
"NEJI will commence." Ayame banged a hammer on the desk and called everyone to order. Now..."
"As we all know, we have a new member who will join us in a couple of minutes. Our next mission, meanwhile, is to find a way to kidnap and make the following person a member of NEJI..." Ayame drew a name from a bowl filled with slips of paper. "Uchiha-"
"DAMN!" Zabuza threw his open can of Sprite onto the ground which caused it to spill as he crossed his arms and stuck out his lip in disappointment. Gina stood up from her chair and cheered as she imagined all the good times Sasuke will have as a member of NEJI. "YES!"
"-Itachi."
"DAMN!!!" Gina then stomped her foot and pouted, sitting back down as Zabuza got up and cheered for the new member literally joining the club. "YES!"
"Think of all of the fun we would get if we has the older brother, Gina-chan." Ayame smiled at her friend, who in return, gave a demonic growl..
"You SAID we were kidnapping SASUKE." Gina glared at Ayame. "HE'S the one being attacked by a succubus right now. Itachi is such a player, he even cheated on himself."
Kashike started in. "FIRSTLY, Itachi is a very HOT player...and you can't cheat on yourself."
"YES YOU CAN."
"HOW?"
"You can date yourself, then date another girl."
"You can't DATE YOURSELF." Kashike shouted to the confused Gina, then knocked her down and started beating her up.
Zabuza held up his new can of soda. "CATFIGHT. Meow."
"WILL EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP AND GET BACK TO THE MAIN ISSUE HERE?"
Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at Ayame, who was standing at the front of the room of her apartment's living room. She pointed to her fellow chef. "THAT-GUY-OVER-THERE."
That-Guy-Over-There blinked. "Yes Ayame-sensei?"
"Get Neji out of the closet." The brown-haired fangirl smiled and watched as That-Guy-Over-There posed himself by the closet.
"Ladies and gentlemen, prepare to meet the newest member of NEJI..."
That-Guy-Over-There opened the closet door, which was Ayame's cue to say the name of the newest member.
"NEJI HYUGA! Neji! You're finally out! I want to tell you something: I love you. I love everything about you! And I also love Panic at the disco."
A body collapsed on the floor when the door was pulled open. It was Neji, blindfolded and tied up, spawled on the ground looking as if he were dying of starvation. "Need...food..."
"...oh...um...food..." That-Guy-Over-There chuckled nervously and itched the back of his head.
Ayame growled. "YOU IDIOT! NOW I GOTTA CONFESS MY LOVE AGAIN IN CHAPTER 9!...well, me and That-guy-over-there will take care of Neji. Meanwhile, you guys find a way to get Itachi."
"Yes!" The rest of the NEJI cheered with the new mission and all the fun they could have planning this scheme.
"And now people. It's THE moment of truth."
Kashike turned to her fellow NEJI members, excluding Neji, Ayame, and That-Guy-Over-There. The three people were wearing black Akatsuki uniforms/cloaks with little red clouds on them, hiding behind a bush in front of the Akatsuki Org. building. Kashike looked to make sure the coast is clear, then gave a signal. "Go."
Gina tied her hair back and climbed the oak tree. "Alright Gina, now just climb the tree and look for an open window." Kashike yelled as Gina made a face at her.
"Yeah! You know how Itachi looks like, right?" Zabuza called out to the girl on the tree. Gina kept on climbing and chose a destination, a window that looked as if it was a trillion billion miles away. "Yep...
ZABUZA, THE WINDOW'S TOO FAR AWAY!"
"It's right there." Zabuza pointed to the window about two feet away from Gina.
"Ohhhh!...
Wait dammit. It's locked." Gina shouted as Ayame wandered to the group of her friends-dressed-as-Akatsuki people.
"Hello peoples."
"Then find another one!" The brown-haired-man turned to Ayame waiting for her to say something. Ayame, getting the point, cupped her hands around her mouth so Gina can hear her.
"HEY GINA-CHAN!!! CAN YOU SEE MY HOUSE FROM THERE?"
"No Ayame! We have to get her INSIDE the building." Zabuza flicked Ayame's forehead, at which then the Neji fangirl punched Zabuza's hand away.
Kashike scratched her head. "Dude...aren't you supposed to be with Neji?"
"I'm sure that wherever dear sweet Neji-kun is, that he's being brave and not a coward."
/meanwhile/
Neji looked to see if the close was clear, then ran for his life.
/crash/
"Ow..." Neji slid off the window of the taxi he crashed into. The car door opened and out stepped Sasuke, wearing Lee's shoes . He looked down at the Hyuga prodigy sprawled on the ground.
"OH MY GOD!"
Neji held up a hand at Sasuke. "I'm fine...don't worry-"
"What the hell? No! you RUINED MY RIDE!" Sasuke threw his arms out in anger while examining the scratch Neji had put into the taxi. "It only cost me like a jillion dollars!"
"It's not even your car-"
Anger flashed through Sasuke's eyes "Hyuga, I'm going to kill you...
...in a verbal SERVE-OFF." The Uchiha concluded his sentence.
/back at NEJI/
"Hey Ayame." Gina called back down to her friend from the high tree-branch she was at. "How does your house look like?"
"Just get inside Kisame's room now." The brown-haired prep of NEJI instructed Gina. "He bunks with Itachi."
"Is it the one with half of the room "Extremely Emo" and the other half "Finding Nemo"?"
"Yeah."
Gina put on a ski mask. "I'm going in."
"GOOD LUCK GINA!" The other Neji members were outside in a group cheering for Gina, holding up posters.
Gina then slipped off the branch and into the window of Itachi and Kisame's bedroom. Half of the room, as Gina had previously said, was Extremely Emo. The walls were painted black and had Linkin Park posters on the walls, there were blades on the table, nail polish at the desk...yeah. The other half of the room consisted of blue walls, a fish tank, a Finding Nemo bedspread, and a lot of plushy fishes. Itachi was on his bed sleeping and Kisame was not in the room at the moment.
Gina tiptoed towards Itachi, but her foot got tangled on something. "Hey..."
"Gina, shhh." Ayame said to her friend from a walkie talkie.
"SHH NO. I STEPPED ON SOMEBODY'S G-STRING."
"Well you should have PUT YOUR SHOES ON BEFORE YOU CLIMBED UP. Now get him."
Gina took out her butterfly net of doom and put it over Itachi's head, then she dragged him outside, the still-sleeping Itachi too heavy of a sleeper to notice.
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Hinata, Shino. I got a surprise for you." Kiba led the blindfolded Hyuga Girl and Bug Boy through the corridors of KNY Airport, then through a terminal passageway that-lets-you-get-on-the-plane (Forgot what they were called. x.x) where he sat them both down on a seat of Arizona Airlines. When he was done with that, he let the blindfolds go.
/wtf/
"An airplane trip?"
Kiba shhhed them and lowered his voice to silence his plan. "We're gonna hijack this plane and fly to Kentucky."
Hinata froze, fear covering her from head to toe. Shino only coughed. "Why?"
"Because I want real KFC, not Konohian KFC. Konohian KFC is contaminated with germs of not-kentuckyans therefore giving you AIDS."
"you could have taken the plane to kentucky..."
"IT'S NOT THE SAAAAME."
Shino grabbed his daredevil-streaked rootin-tootin' whatever partner Kiba. "You aren't going to do this, right?"
"Yes I am." Kiba said as the plane door closed, causing the actual plane to start taxiing. Hinata paled in fear and grabbed Shino, Kiba whistling the tune of Sweet Home Alabama.
/30 minutes later/
"Alright, we are above Kentucky right now, folks." The pilot said using an intercom. This was Kiba's signal to get up and start making his was towards the cockpit. "I'll be back."
"I DON'T WANNA DIE!" Hinata called after him, but Kiba kept on going. The plane started to shake and luggages fell out of the compartment area above the seat.
"Excuse me folks, this is the pilot. We'll be experiencing some turbulance because the co-pilot is TOUCHING MY WHEEL. TT"
"Folks this is the co-pilot. It's not the PILOT'S wheel. It's the AIRPLANE'S WHEEL-what. Who the hell are you?"
Kiba's voice then appeared in the intercom. "The name's Inuzuka. Kiba Inuzuka. Or Ludicrus Mace. But THAT is another story-"
The co-pilot spoke again. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE BOY?"
Kiba's voice. "Say hello to my lil' friend!"
Everyone started murmuring about what they were talking about, then screamed as a shot was heard. "AHHH!"
The plane started making that sound when you crash, and people were running around screaming in a panic.
Hinata grabbed hold of Shino again as Kiba ran to the both of them and pulled them to the emergency exit, then jumped out of it with a parachute on his back. He pulled the string as Hinata and Shino clung onto them for dear life. "KFC HERE I COME."
A few minutes later, Team Kurenai minus Kurenai arrived at a KFC in Louisville or something, only to find out that it was closed.
"Oh. Too bad. Let's go home." Hinata sighed happily and hool Kiba's hand, pulling him to the airport.
Kiba shrugged in sadness, then spoke into Hinata's ear. "Don't worry Hinata. There's always Rice-A-Roni, the SAN FRANSISCO TREAT-"
"SHUT THE HELL UP, BITCH." hinata kicked Kiba (that's a first) and dragged him to the airport, Shino following them pretending to be a bug.
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"Ohhhh, you wanna start something? Then bring it." Sasuke motioned Neji toward him, then stood still to defy his pride.
"Ballerina man."
Neji took out a slice of bread/pound cake and started throwing pieces at Sasuke. "Fruity-tooty ducks ass hair boy scout."
"Fist, MY HAIR IS NATURALLY IN BALANCE. And how else would I know which way points to civilization without leaving a trail?"
The Hyuga spat on the floor at Sasuke's feet. "At least I don't go to OROCHIMARU with all my problems."
"well...if Peter Piper picked a pack of pickled peppers, how many pickled peppers did Peter Piper pick?"
Neji smirked, cross his arms, and stared Sasuke right in the eye."Eight."
(Uh...Madara here. . Thing is I forgot what the answer to that riddle is, so just play along, k?)
Damn, this Hyuga guy is good, Sasuke thought to himself.
Sasuke, getting the smile of satisfaction, put on a serious face. "Well...Neji. Did you know the Soul Society just called. They want you to sell your body to science."
"Seriously...?"
"Yeah." The Uchiha smiled eagerly at Neji, then dialed the Soul Society. He gave the phone to Neji. "Here..."
"Neji Hyuga. This is the Death Reaper calling for you. I NEEEEED you BOOODY."
A look of fear appeared on Neji's face, then suspicion."...Naruto? Is that you?"
"HI NEJI!" Naruto waved hi to Neji from the rooftop. "THROW ME SOME CAKE!"
Rather than some cake, Neji threw a rock at Naruto, knocking him out as he fell off the roof and landed on Sasuke. "Rock pwns paper."
Naruto woke up and ran to Neji, getting off of Sasuke. "Neji Hyuga!" He grabbed the person whom he was speaking to and shook him by the shoulders. "OMG. YES IT IS! I'M NARUTO UZUMAKI AND YOU HAVE JUST BEEN PUNK'D!"
Sasuke was bursting in laughter as Neji finally got the point and smiled a bit. "..."
"ADMIT IT!!!!"
"...yeah...yeah, I've just been punk'd."
"THIS IS LIKE THE TIME WE HIJACKED THE CAR WITH THE SHURIKEN. THIS IS SO...AWESOME! NEJI HYUGA JUST BEEN PUNK'D! HYUGA PRODIGY. WELCOME TO PUNK'DVILLE, POPULATION YOU."
/knock out/
"loser." Neji blew at his poking finger as if it were a gun while Sasuke was still laughing.
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ATTENTION ALL AKATSUKI MEMBERS: IT IS HOTDOG DAY TODAY. HOTDOG DAY.
Moans of disatisfaction filled the office room of the Akatsuki Corporation when all employees of the company (Deidara. Sasori. Tobi. Zetsu. Hidan. Kakuzu. Kisame. Itachi wasn't there atm) were working on faxes. Tobi scanned a document into the computer to edit something on it when the office door opened and in stepped Kankuro and Temari.
"Hey Tobi, we're looking for Ray."
Tobi lifted his head up from his work and spoke in a southern accent. "Yo he dead."
Kankuro leaned toward Tobi for better listening reception. "...no I'm looking for RAY-MOND."
"I said he dead."
Kankuro spoke slowly for Tobi to understand. "No, I'm looking for Kazekage Raymond."
"What da matter wit you? I SAY YOU HE DEAD."
"...THE KAZEKAGE!"
Temari whacked Kankuro on the head. "Moron, it obviously means he's not here. Let's go." With that, Temari dragged Kankuro out of the building away from Tobi, who only shrugged and went back to work.
/poof/
"I'm sorry I'm late." Raymond spoke to Tobi. "Tell Marcus I'm here."
Tobi got up and ran to the door yelling ZOMBIE, then knocked himself out. Marcus answered and gestured Ray, Yashamaru, and Chiyo in. They entered the room, stepping over Tobi as they went in.
"Ray, I got your resume. I must say I'm thoroughly unimpressed."
Ray's eyes went wide with shock. "What? I said EVERYTHING you asked me to! My name, adress-" Raymond began leafing through the sheets on Marcus's table.
Marcus got a confused look. "The resume I got had a picture of a rock, a twinkie, and me dressed as a cowboy."
"...Yashamaru?"
Yashamaru smiled sweetly. "Yes Ray?"
"I'LL KILL YOU."
"Ok Ray."
Marcus pointed to the drawing. "Poor craftsmanship, AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN COLOR INSIDE THE LINES."
Yashamaru folded his hands and looked pleased with himself. "I color outside the lines because... It's the way I express myself."
"That's my husband!" Chiyo patted Yashamaru on the head, disgusted looks from Ray and Marcus.
"And the thing is...you're just not cutting it off. I mean...not only does it take Madara FOREVER to update a chapter, but I always get the same crap and cliches from all my interviews. An intellegent man,
the loudmouth girl with the attitude
...and he...he's just the whore."
"WHERE'S MY ELEPHANT INDEED!" Yashamaru yelled out randomly while Chiyo cracked her knuckled at Marcus.
The AL took an aspirin and massaged his scalp for a moment, then went to Ray and nodded toward the blonde. "I mean...we literally hear the word 'twinkie' everytime he opens his mouth."
The fourth kazekage blinked. "I don't understand what you're saying."
-
"-jealous because you can't have my twinkies!"
-
"Twinkies!"
-
"My twinkies!"
-
"Twinkies?"
-
"Hm...twinkies."
-
"Twinkies..."
-
"OH MY GOD1 MY TWINKIES!"
-
"Twin-kies!"
-
"Just eating a Twinkie!"
-
"MY TWINKIE!"
-
"-when I'm drawing pictures of twinkies!"
-
"Mr. Twinkiekins?"
-
"TWINKIES!"
-
"-stepped on all of my twinkies."
-
"My twinkies?"
-
"Twinkie?"
-
"What about my twinkies?"
-
"-go good with some twinkies!"
-
"TWINKIE!"
-
"-twinkies?"
-
"My twinkies?...TWINKIES!"
-
"Do you want a twinkie?"
-
"Twinkie..."
-
"TWINKIES! I want a twinkie!"
-
"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY TWINKIES?"
-
"NO! ANYTHING BUT THE TWINKIES!"
-
"Well the thing is that Twinkies taste good..."
Raymond took a long look at Marcus, then got up to leave. "...shut up..."
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Well, the Serve-off was a success. Sasuke was proclaimed winner due to Punk'd Default. However, NEJI went all Team Rocket on them both and captured them, then took them to a place where only the strongest of men return from.
"Hi my name is Kashike and I'm sponosoring this video tape: Sasuke, God of Lightning vs. Neji, God of Destiny."
Gina was whining at Ayame and Kashike. "But Sasuke doesn't need no library book, retard."
"...what?"
"Whatever. Neji's gonna win anyway." Ayame high-fived her camera-man.
Gina did that evil-mokey-in-your-closet thing. "LIKE HELL."
"Win what?" Zabuza asked cluelessly.
Kashike gave a grin that said this is gonna be good and led all of them into a building.
/30 minutes later/
Kashike sat on the fence ledge and watched the two fighters get ready.
"This is the Wild Wild West Paintball fight."
"This sucks." Zabuza said aloud to himself as Teuchi rolled the camera into the pit where Sasuke and Neji were both half-dressed as cowboys. Better yet...they had the cowboy vest, hat, and boots on, but were shirtless and wearing only a swim garment.
Kashike cupper her hands over her mouth and yelled out to Ayame and Gina. "SPEEDO G-STRINGS."
"So hot...I mean dotdotdot. That rhymes." The two fangirls said at the same time, then went to the audience.
"Real Ninjas
don't RHYME their EXCLAMATIONS." Zabuza spat out in disgust, Itachi next to him, blindfolded and gagged like Neji was, watching Sasuke and Neji give dirty glares to each other.
"Whatever." Ayame said, then took out her camera phone to take pictures. Gina did the same but stopped when she and ayame were asked by the sponsor of the fight to get some twinkies to make the fight more...creamy (ew)
"The rules: Use your gun to shoot the other guy down. The winner wins. The loser must be eaten alive
...in a game of STBS by the senseis."
"I'M WINNING." Both Sasuke and Neji immediately shouted at each other.
Kashike then brought the whistle to her mouth. "The let the Wild West Paint Ball fight hold off until Ayame and Gina get back with the twinkies!
GONG YI TEMPAI!"
(Madara here. Dx I forgot how it goes. The chapter's about to end anyway so yeah. o.o)
-----------------------
At Winn Dixie, out blonde hero was sitting down at a bench waiting for his friends to arrive. Gina and Ayame were heading toward the twinkie aisle in order to obtain a box of the spongy cream-filled snacks known as...TWINKIES!
A certain blonde ninja (Yashamaru. x.x) was sitting at the bench beside the Twinkie aisle, waiting for his friends and everyone else to come so he can steal their twinkies and run off with them. He stretched and yawned. "Hnnnnn...twinkies.."
"Hey! If I were you, I'd stop that yawning." The brown-haired ninja known as Ayame had dies her hair purple with pink highlights. She was carrying a paintball gun while wearing a black paintball outfit. Gina was next to her texting somebody wearing the same thing. "Nyeh."
Ayame waved her finger at Yashamaru while giving him a glare." You don't want to wake THEM up...don't you?"
/long silence/
Yashamaru blinked his purple eyes at Ayame. "Um...who's them-"
"LONG LONG AGO! BEFORE THE TIME OF YOUR FLIPPING TWINKIES OR PURPLE-HAIRED PINK-HIGHLIGHTED NINJAS WERE EXISTING...
there was...an Hyuga prodigy of the Cadet Branch! That went by the name of N-"
"Uh..." Yashamaru interrupted Ayame. "Don't you...have something to do with that paintball gun?"
Gina had her iPod on and was listening to Crazy Frog. She shot a box of Twinkies with her paintball gun, causing it to explode in cream and spongyness while Ayame's face turned into a death glare. "WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT THE PAINTBALL GUN?"
Yashamaru shrugged and smirked. "Oh, nobody! I'm just a sexy blonde who just happens to be one of the most underrated characters in the show while I'm also the most hated character, out of all the Gaara fans!"
Ayame spoke again in the cold voice. "WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT THE PAINTB-"
"yo people." Gaara was staring at the ground not looking at the people whom he was passing. He then grabbed a box of twinkies from the shelf. "If you see a 9-tailed-fox going by the name of Stealer, text the word 'wtf' to six six four six six."
/hiss/
Ayame and Gina snapped up to attention, the Uchiha fangirl pausing her iPod. "What was that?"
Gaara went into his inner mode and into the inner supermarker. Inner Ayame and Inner Gina were in the Inner Winn Dixie where a GIANT nine-tailed fox was crouched behind a tiny shelf of twinkies. Inner Ayame turned to look at Yashamaru after getting a look of horrow, but only saw a nickel in his place.
"...your inner self is a nickel?"
"Yeah..." The nickle spoke to Inner Ayame. "...omg...look at that fox over there...maybe it likes Twi-"
"HURRAY FOR CHAPTER EIGHT!" Kicks yelled as he appeared next to Gaara.
Inner Gaara spoke. "Oh no! Kyuubi is going to steal the Twinkies! I need your help! Do you see Kyuubi?"
"I SEE HIM!" Gina smiled and pointed at Kyuubi.
"Uh...no, I'm not Kyuubi. I'm your consience." Kyuubi nudged Gina a bit, who slapped her forehead and said oh yeah.
"Nevermind!"
"He's right there retard." Ayame pointed at Kyuubi this time. "And don't say you're my consience. My consience is Neji-kun."
"You're a smart girl...who is this Neji?"
Ayame counted her fingers as she said all of Neji's occupations. "My boyfriend, husband, Anti-drug-"
"ENOUGH!" Shukaku silenced the entire inner store with his boomign voice. "Let's stop this 9-tailed-FOX from stealing the twinkies! Say it with us!"
All of the inner people at the Inner Winn Dixie and Kicks held out their hand in a stop motion to stop Kyuubi. "STEALER NO STEALING-"
/fire/
"ow..."
A red aura of chakra surrounded the fox as Naruto took away Gaara's twinkies physically. "Haha!"
"Hey! We were gonna buy those!" Gina waved her arms whining at Naruto.
Kyuubi gave a scary grin as death music played in the background. He took a deep breath and was about to blow fire at all of the inner people again.
The Outer Gina froze and then yelled everyone to attention. "...run. RUN."
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Ayame and Gina poofed back to the stadium twinkieless and in defeat. Kashike ran up to them and greeted them. "So? What happened?"
"Kyuubi went all super saiyan on us and we couldn't get the twinkies." Ayame said, kicking a rock.
"We need to do something to pass the time until the fight..." Gina thought really hard for a group activity. Her eyes wandered to Itachi, then she had a mister grinch smile.
Itachi's eyes met Gina's. "...what?"
/5 minutes later/
Itachi was in a dressing room dressed as a paper mache creme pumpkin. He had no idea why, however. Things didn't change when Kashike filled the costume up with candy. "Of you'll see Itachi. You'll see."
She then led Itachi outside where Ayame, Gina, Neji, Sasuke, and That-Guy-Over-There were practicing hitting a tree with a bat. Zabuza tied a cord onto Itachi's costume then let it go over the tree branch.
"...oh HELL no."
The brown-haired soccer-loving girl got the camera rolling. "This...is the Human pinata."
"Oh shit." The five people with the bat smacked the tree so hard, that some of the bark peeled off. Itachi whimpered a bit, then glared hard at Gina.
"Guys, let me go first." Gina said, cacking evilly as she swung her bat hard in the air. "He's mine...all mine..."
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End Chapter 8. Told you it sucked. D:
Kimi: Because I wasn't in it?
You're DEAD, Kimi. Literally. x.x