A/N; Well..second chapter..Took me a loooong time to write, mainly because of damn school. I hope this chapter fills any confusion, but if not, drop me a review, and I'll try attempt to "fix" it.
The rain hammered down on the windows as Lana looked out. She was sat by her mother's side, gently squeezing her hand. Her father had just gone into surgery, and Lana had mixed feelings about whether she wanted him to survive. She looked down at her mother's bruised face, wandering how something like that could have happened over the years without her noticing it.
"Mom..I'm so sorry.. I should have stopped him.. I'm so sorry.." Lana said softly, fighting back tears that threatened to escape. She refused to break down, she would be strong, for her and her mother's sake.
An attending, Bailey and her stream of interns trailed into the room quietly. Bailey cleared her throat, and Lana looked up. She acutely nodded as she let go of her mother's hand as a handsome Doctor began to speak.
"Maria Parker, 37 years old, suffers from internal bleeding and head trauma, also has some unexplainable bruising around her lower stomach, upper chest and face." He finished speaking as Bailey handed him the chart.
"She's yours Karev, schedule an MRI and get back to Dr Shepherd with the results."
Derek walked briskly through to the NICU searching for Addison. He saw her hunched over an isolette, examining a baby's pupil.
"When were you going to tell me she's here?" Derek asked her, waiting for her response.
"When I found time to find you." She coldly replied, turning around with her hands on her hips. "Do you really think I wouldn't tell you that our own daughter whom we haven't seen in eight years is in this hospital?"
Derek ran his hands through his hair, a million thoughts running through his mind. He was happy with Meredith, and then Lana had turned up.
"Does she know we work here?"
"No. I don't think she knows who we are." Addison turned back to the isolette, not wanting Derek to see the tears forming behind her eyelids.
"What? But she was with us for six years!"
"I know." Addison whispered quietly, not hearing Derek walk up behind her. A tear fell, and she wiped it away discreetly. He hovered over her, not knowing how to approach the situation. Addison turned her head away, a sign for him to leave.
She lay trembling in the alley, she stayed for a few minutes, before picking herself up and attempting to find her way home. A random middle-aged woman approached her, asking is she was okay. She shied away from her, her eyes showing evident fear. The woman held out her hand, asking for her to accompany her. She held on to her hand for dear life, thinking if she never let go, she would never be hurt again. The woman asked her where she lived, but the young girl stared blankly.
She didn't remember.
Lana awoke from her deep sleep, remembering what she had dreamt. She shuddered, and stretched her legs. Her mother fluttered her eyelids, and opened them.
"Hey, mom." Lana yawned, grabbing hold of her hand.
"Lana.." Her mother let out a weak whisper. "I'm sorry.."
Lana almost laughed, she had said practically the same thing earlier. "For what, you never did anything." Lana's face was etched with confusion, looking down at her mother's peaceful, yet worried features.
"I'm sorry.."
"Sorry for what? Lana sensed urgency in her mother's voice, which was only peaking Lana's curiosity and confusion.
"I took you away.." With that final statement, she instantly flatlined, the dull, continuous beep filling the room and echoing in Lana's ears, drowning out what her mother had previously said. Nurses ran into the room, and Alex sprinted to the bedside, where he immediately started compressions, and charging up the paddles. After a couple of minutes, the room the monitor had been switched off, enveloping the room into a silence Lana couldn't bear. She stared straight ahead, her eyes blank. She barely heard the confirmation.
"Time of death, 15.27"
Lana briskly walked out of the room, toward the nearest restroom. She didn't bother to lock herself in, she just emptied the remains of her lunch into the toilet. She stared at herself in the mirror, seeing dark circles under her eyes, and the faraway, blank look. She couldn't process what had happened. Her mother just died. She was no longer in her life. She didn't exist anymore. Lana splashed water over her face, and as she opened her eyes, she recognised the woman from earlier, from the nurse's desk.
"I'm sorry..I heard about your mother.." She started, before Lana interrupted.
"It's okay. I'll get over it..I don't think she was my.." Lana trailed off, the fact just settling in the pit of her stomach. She put a hand over her mouth and ran for the nearest toilet. She felt the woman scrape her hair back, and whispered soothing words in her ear. She sat back, wiping her mouth.
"I'm sorry." Lana choked out, embarrassed of having chucked up in front of another doctor.
"Hey, it happens. I'm Addison." She introduced herself. Hoping her name might trigger something. Lana looked sideways, and managed a small smile.
"Lana Caoimhe Parker. But mainly Lana."
Addison felt a pang of pain. She didn't have her surname. Addison cracked a small smile, and squeezed Lana's shoulder. Lana stood up, brushing her jeans. She offered a hand to Addison, who pulled herself up. They exchanged smiles before exiting the restroom.
"Hey, erm, Lana? Would you like to spend the day with me in the NICU?" Addison offered, hoping to spend time with her. Lana smiled. "I'd love to" The two made their way up, Addison stealing glances at Lana. She looks exactly like me, Addison realised, briefly closing her eyes, but opening them so she couldn't bump into anything.
The phone rang, and Derek reached for it. He and Addison had searched everywhere for Lana. Addison was near to a breaking point, but she held it together, waiting for hope. Derek answered the phone.
"Dr Shepherd? We found your daughter." At those words, Derek grabbed Addison and held her close, as he asked for more details. He hung up, and chased Addison out into the streets. When they reached the building that their daughter was in, mother and father burst through the doors, asking for her. A woman brought her out, but they hardly recognised her. The Lana they knew, was bubbly and oozing with confidence. This Lana was pale, and withdrawn. She looked up at Addison and Derek without a trace of recognition. She held on to the woman's hand, who introduced herself.
"Hi. I'm Maria Parker, I found your daughter lost on the streets." Her voice was laced with accusatory undertones, making Derek and Addison uncomfortable, and guilty.
"Ms Parker, with all due respect, but we searched high and low for her, we phoned every search party we could, we phoned the police, filed a missing person's report, we did everything we could to find our daughter." Derek said, trying to keep his voice strong. Lana looked confused, and started fiddling with her pocket. Addison leant down to her level, and kept eye contact.
"Hey baby, You can come home now." She said softly, stroking Lana's hair. Lana inched closer to Maria, not registering what was going on. Addison's heart slowly broke, as she heard Lana's small voice.
"Who are you?"
Derek put his hand on Addison's shoulder, tears threatening to come out of his own eyes.
"I'm your mom." Addison spoke, hoping this little bit of information would register in Lana's mind. Lana slowly slipped her hand out of Maria's as she gradually remembered.
"Mommy," Lana cried, as she ran into Addison's embrace. Addison held her tight, never wanting to lose her again. Derek stooped down, and held the two of the most precious women in his life close to him. He buried his head in Addison's hair, but that didn't protect him from the bombshell that was to come.
"I've contacted lawyers, they feel the same about this situation. Lana is being put under my care."
Addison stood up, disbelieving.
"What? Why?!" She yelled, hoping this was all a terrible dream. Derek held on to Lana's hand, and laced his free one into Addison's.
"We all feel you neglected Lana. You lost her. She was found wandering the streets, full of bruises, and tatty clothes." Maria said calmly. Tears were streaming down Addison's face, feeling her world crumble. Lana latched on to her leg, sensing the heartbreak.
"We'll be contacting you." Maria said shortly, before taking Lana's hand. Lana struggled against her, screaming for Addison. Addison reached her arms out, but Lana was being dragged away from her, like in some unreal dream. Derek ran after Lana, but Maria had disappeared. He returned to see Addison collapsed on the floor sobbing uncontrollably. In one blink of an eye, they had lost their daughter.
Addison showed Lana around the NICU, stopping at the baby she had been treating earlier. Addison checked her vitals as Lana watched, studying Addison carefully.
"I've seen you before.. I just can't remember where.." Lana trailed off as Addison looked up at her, hope written across her face.
"Where have I seen you?" Lana asked softly, walking around the isolette to where Addison was standing. Addison turned, and looked into Lana's eyes, seeing the mask of confusion and a spark of recognition quickly flash across them.
"Mommy stop!" Lana laughed, running across the beach. Addison was chasing her, eventually catching up to her and scooping her up in the air, twirling her around.
"How does it feel like to fly?" Addison asked Lana, setting her down and lay beside her.
"It feels windy." Came Lana's reply, making Addison laugh.
Lana took a step back from Addison, fear evident on her face. Addison looked confused.
"What's wrong?"
"I.. I can't breathe.." Lana gasped for air, holding on to the isolette. Addison's maternal instincts kicked in, and helped Lana to sit, and put her head between her knees. She slowly rubbed her back, as Lana's breath became more regular. Lana sat up, and leaned into Addison. At that moment, the facts kicked in. Her mother was dead, but was she really her mother? Tears escaped from her eyes, rolling down her cheeks and dripping onto Addison's lab coat. Addison held her tighter, knowing all she could do was to let her cry. She never wanted to let go, she didn't want to lose her again. Lana grasped Addison's coat, and pressed her face against her shoulder.
"Shhh.." Addison soothed, rubbing circles on her back. Lana briefly looked up at Addison before asking, "What is it like to fly?"
Addison closed her eyes, remembering the time on the beach. "It feels windy." She replied, smiling at young Lana's remark. Lana pulled back, and rested her head on Addison.
"I know you..I just..can't remember.." Lana said, the pain of not knowing evident on her face. It was at that moment, when Derek walked in, that Lana's whole world went black.
A/N; Okay. Read, Review, constructive criticism..whatever you feel like..Oh, there will be Addek, but at the moment, it's kinda about Lana..littttttle secret though...Addison and Derek "pretend to be together" for her sake..but who knows if it'll develop..Okay zipping my mouth!!! jeeez, no wonder people don't tell me anything!