Those Crazy Obelisks

by Shrilanka-San

Alexis came to Duel Academy to play the game, not knowing that the school was a melting pot for ultimate insanity. Now read the story of her and her friends' first year, as they partake in random misadventures in the world's most dysfunctional dorm.

6. The Fort of Understanding

'Those Crazy Obelisks' is proud to support the CFT (Chunky Frog Toffee). Or is it the other way around?

Hey, it's the Slifer Gang! Don't be surprised if I ever get a chapter out staring nothing but them. You see…they're as prone to crazy escapades as the Obelisks are (as I'm sure you've all figured out).

I wanted to make this story line structured around the idea of random, almost sitcom-like episodes, none of which lasted longer than a single chapter. So no matter how long this particular chapter grew, I constantly banged myself on the head by saying 'NO CONTINUATION CHAPTERS! NO CONTINUATION CHAPTERS!'. However, logically, I doubt any of you will want to stomach a nine thousand word long chapter, especially since, being fan-fiction readers, you have innate inclinations to enjoy the chapters that are as short as possible to satisfy very small attention spans.

So basically…yes, this is a part one chapter. I will try not to let multiple-part stories arise once again in this one. Sorry.

Now the plot gets kind of tricky to work, because now we're actually having conflicts with the original story line. Yeah, I'm sure I'm going to get hammered by mail that says 'HEY! ALEXIS FIGURED OUT ZANE HAS A KID BROTHER WAY BEFORE NOW!', but I didn't want to introduce that kind of a topic until people had a decent clue what all of the characters in the story were like through development of their personalities. So that's my excuse, as poor as it is.

Here we go!

CHAPTER SIX

The Best Intentions

Part One: The Fort of Understanding

"HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG!" screamed Kat at the top of her lungs to the audience of fan-fiction readers out there, who, being a fiction character, isn't supposed to realize that she is being viewed by an audience. "IGNORE THE NARRATOR WHO KNOW'S NOTHING! My name's Kat Tillian, and I am the strongest, fastest, and overall hottest P0W4H L4D33 in the school! GO ME!"

She waved a little flag in front of a cluster of Obelisk desks in the lecture class that had 'Powah Kat' written on it. Then she threw it over her shoulder with such force that it stabbed a random Obelisk student in the forehead, causing her to scream in pain and fall backwards to the ground.

"And being the hottest, etc etc POWAH Lady in the school, it is my duty to inform you that…sadly…it's time for…you guessed it…OCTOBER!" screamed Kat. "Well, don't cry, don't cry! We've got a whole bunch of months to go before school ends! Including October! SO YAY!"

She smiled, as the random Obelisk student tried to get up, causing her to get a smart punch in the jaw by Kat, causing him to fall over again.

"So in case any of you weren't here for the first few chapters or were out of it or who are just plain stupid, fear not!" said Kat. "For I, KAT T., THE ENEMY OF ALL OBELISKS, have composed a list of three things you should be aware of before we officially exit September! HECK YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

THING NUMBER ONE!

"CHAZZ DIES HIS HAIR!" screamed Kat, pointing to Chazz's spiky head.

"Okay, the idiocy level in this room has just shot up!" said Chazz, turning to her, just managing to miss stabbing his eye out with her pointed finger. "WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU RANTING ABOUT NOW?"

"YOU TOTALLY DIE YOUR HAIR DUDE!" said Kat, stabbing her finger into his forehead, causing him to yell angrily.

"WHAT FRESH GARBAGE IS THIS!" yelled Chazz nasally, flailing his arms about in pure rage. "I DO NOT DIE MY HAIR! YOU'RE MAD! YOU'RE UTTERLY MAD! NOW GET AWAY FROM ME, BEFORE I SICK ZANE'S SOULESS FANBOYS ON YOU!"

"THEN HOW COME YOU'RE HAIR GETS PINKER THE CLOSER IT GETS TO YOUR SCALP!" yelled Kat.

Silence. Chazz inhaled and was about to speak-

"I'll give you five bucks if you never mention this to Zane," said Chazz, holding out a fiver.

"MAKE IT TEN!" said Kat.

"Seven!" said Chazz.

"THREE!" yelled Kat.

"Deal," said Chazz, pulling out three ones, as Kat snatched them out of his hands and started doing a silly victory dance which was like a bad cross between the shopping cart and the lasso. "Thank God that she has no idea either how to add or haggle…"

SIDE NOTE TO THING NUMBER ONE!

"While were still on the topic of hair, I have a side note!" said Kat, waving wildly behind Zane, who was relatively oblivious to the whole thing due to the fact that he was neatly writing down the week's assignments in his notebook. "Now then, while Chazz's hair is stiff and starchy and not fun at all except to be used as an insult, Zane's hair is SUPER MEGA SOFT!"

With that, she literally dumped the top half of her body weight onto Zane, her face falling straight into the back of his head, sighing happily. This caused him to let out a very soft cry of that disgusting feeling that you get when you see something that got hit very badly by a car that hadn't been cleaned up in a while or when someone dumps ice cubes down your back.

"Ah…I swear, that never gets old," said Kat contently, as Zane looked utterly repulsed, twitching slightly. "Oh yeah, another thing. Don't EVER try to stuff your face in Chazz's hair! I did that once and-"

---ooo---

"I'M BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDING!" screamed Kat, running around Chazz's desk, covering her face and shrieking in shocked pain, her hands covered in blood, as Chazz just gave her a weird look, wondering what possessed her to throw her face into the back of his head.

---ooo---

"On the other hand, you could stuff a pillow with this stuff!" said Kat, pointing over her shoulder at Zane's hair.

"Where the heck is Samantha when you need her?" said Zane, looking all over the room.

THING NUMBER TWO!

"While we're still on the same subject as Zane, that brings us to Thing Number Two!" said Kat, peace signing the audience.

"Samantha?" called Zane, looking around.

"You see, Zane…is actually a woman!" said Kat.

"Samantha!" Zane said in a much louder tone.

"Seriously, from a certain angle, doesn't it look like he has boobs?" asked Kat.

"Okay, that's enough," said Zane. "This was…almost amusing for a little while. But it's gotten out of hand. Go back to your side of the room Kat."

"N3V3R!" screamed Kat. "YOU CANNOT HIDE THE TRUTH KAISER! YEW CANNAE HIDE THE TRUTH!"

"What truth?" asked Zane. "I am not a woman, and Chazz doesn't die his hair!"

"You tell her!" yelled Chazz angrily, carrying a box of hair dye, which he quickly hid behind his back the second Zane turned around.

"Don't worry dude!" said Kat. "I am fully supportive of your sick way of living life!"

"Where are you Samantha?" almost yelled Zane.

THING NUMBER THREE!

"This was originally going to be a side note to the side note of thing number one, but I was running out of ideas and I got hungry by the time I got to thinking up this item," said Kat. "So, the very last item is about the Obelisk Lady herself, Alexis Rhodes!"

"You don't have a timer that I can borrow, do you Zane?" asked Chazz to Zane.

"Professor?" asked Zane, raising his hand.

"Now, this is about her hair!" said Kat. "You see, while her hair is this sort of a doughy color, you know, like donuts and bagels and pizza, you'd expect her hair to smell like pastries! But it doesn't!"

"Can I borrow your tranquilizer?" Zane asked, still raising his hand.

"Anyway…Lex?" asked Kat, looking around, at last realizing that Alexis wasn't in the room. "Hey, where's Lex? I need to…Lex? Woo-hoo? Lex? Olie Olie Oxen Free! Lex…Lex?"

---ooo---

"I really hope she's done with that 'month in review' thing," said Alexis, staying firmly crouched behind a huge garbage can in the hallway outside of the classroom. "Honestly, which one is scarier, Kat or Joku?"

---ooo---

"I think we all know the answer to that…" said Joku in his usual mega-monotone, wearing a frilly pink shirt, hot pants, and a huge, black, lacy umbrella.

---ooo---

"Okay…she should be done know…" said Alexis, peeking over the garbage can to see if everyone was gone. "Time to-"

"ONE! TWO…uh…uh…hang on…oh yeah…THREE! FOUR…SIX!"

"It's four five six Jaden!"

"Oh…yeah…I've always kind of had a blind spot for five…"

"JUST SHUT UP AND COUNT!"

"OKAY! FOUR! FIVE SIX! Okay…here's the tricky one…SEVEN!"

"YOU DID IT JADEN!"

"YEAH! A NUMBER WITH FOUR-"

"FIVE!"

"-FIVE LETERS! WOOT!"

Alexis could just feel the pulses of idiocy reverberating around the room, so with extreme caution, she peeked over the top of the garbage can to face the racket. What she saw was (PALIDROME) a kid wearing a Slifer Red dorm jacket, his face stuffed in both arms, which were resting against the wall, looking like he was playing hide-and-go-seek with some unknown party. He had rusty brown hair, which was cut so short you could tell he was a boy, yet long enough to look absolutely ridiculous (SCREAM FANGIRLS, SCREAM!).

"READY OR NOT, HERE I COME!" screamed the brown-head at the top of his lungs. There was silence as he just stood there for a minute. Almost half a minute passed.

"Pss! You're supposed to look for us Jaden!" said a high-pitched voice, yet one that sounded male.

"OH! I always forget that part…" said the brown head, presumably 'Jaden' going by what Alexis just heard. "RIGHT! WHERE ARE YOU SYRUS!"

"Right here!" said a very short kid, presumably Syrus, who had very light blue colored hair, with huge, sparkling gray eyes not-hidden-at-all behind very tiny glasses, getting up from behind his hiding spot, which was behind an open door.

"FOUND YOU!" said Jaden.

"…RATS!" yelled Syrus.

"RIGHT!" said Jaden, not the most gracious winner in the world, but at least he wasn't doing the 'Jaden Dance'. "NOW IT'S TIME TO FIND CHUMLEY!"

He walked two steps over, standing next to a huge wall of human, taller than him by a solid head, looking around in all directions, as if not noticing him, because in truth…he didn't notice him. Even though the huge wall of a person's only form of camouflage was a small, potted plant that he held in front of his face. The confused individual finally turned to see this huge wall of a person, and just stared at him for a moment.

"Is that you Chumley?" asked Jaden.

"How did you know?" asked the man of greater-than-average body weight, his face peeking from behind the feeble plant. His facial appearance is hard to describe, but one would put it in some kind of category between one who looks like a koala or a girl with pigtails who stuck an oxygen pipe in her mouth and blew herself up, then put a pair where her nose should be.

"WHOA! YOU'RE GOOD!" screamed Jaden.

Oh…they must be Slifer Red boys…thought Alexis. Funny, everyone says that kids from Slifer are hard core drop outs who beat up people and key scratch cars and smoke and don't put the seat down…and other tough kid stuff. You know…sort of like-

Wavy Imaginary Scenario Effects

"YOU'RE PRETTY COCKY, YEW KNOW THAT ROOKIES!" yelled Jaden, in a long, black trenchcoat, carrying a short, finger-print stained iron pipe, with a rough 'Fight or Die' T-shirt and black leather pants.

"You wanna walk on our streets?" said Syrus, wearing a jacket similar to Jaden's, and also with similar pants, but instead of a T-shirt, his chest was tied up by taunt, white cloth (with a crudely drawn Dark Magician Girl on the front), like he received a vital injury across his chest.

"Then get ready to pay up!" said Chumley, who was wearing a white t-shirt, same coat and pants, and really cool looking black sunglasses.

"Oh, you want pay? We'll give you pay!" said Kat, wearing a 'Madlax' kind of outfit, with a skin-tight shirt, short jacket, black leather hot-pants, and tall, thigh-high onyx boots.

"We'll even give you a special bonus for our trouble!" said Samantha, wearing a down-to-the floor pleated skirt that had a huge rip up the side of her thigh to her hip, sunglasses instead of her normal ones, and a button-up black trench coat like the boys.

"I'm Joku," said Joku, also wearing a long pleated skirt , middy sailor blouse with the middle part torn out, and a 'PH34R II$' headband.

"THEN GET READY, CAUSE WE'RE HERE TO COLLECT!" screamed Jaden, ripping out a pair of 'Super Soaker's and letting loose at the three, who all leapt with super speed in different directions.

"THEN YOU GET READY TO TAKE IT!" screamed Kat, pulling out a pair of her own and firing a barrage of a counter attack on the gang, causing them to turn to defense.

"I'M NOT TOO SCARED TO DIE!" screamed Chumley.

"My dad made me wear a-" said Joku, right before he got his lights knocked out by a punch form Chumley. Three seconds later, he rose to his feet. "-that was-" BAM! "-and it smelt like-" BAM! "-and my legs were-"

"YOU FIGHT LIKE A LITTLE GIRL!" screamed Syrus, as he and Samantha were in hand to hand fighting combat.

"YOU ARE A LITTLE GIRL!" yelled Sam, as the two each tried to take the other down with wicked awesome karate moves.

"YOU THINK YOU TOUGH! YOU THINK YOU TOUGH!" screamed Jaden, firing the super soaker in every direction, thoroughly drenching everything in sight.

Back to Reality Effects

"Ah…I seriously need to stop playing those 'Street Fighter' games," sad Alexis.

"FOUND YOU!" screamed Jaden, banging her on the top of the head, causing her to fall over, screaming in shock, which was cut off abruptly when her face came in hard contact with the tile floor.

"JADEN! WHAT DID YOU DO!" screamed the littlest one, Syrus, rushing over to Alexis's cringing form.

"Ow…" said Alexis, as little cracks were slowly spiddering from the point of contact between Alexis's face and the floor.

"Aw dude, and you slammed an Obelisk too…" said Chumley.

"OH NO! SAINTS PRESERVE US, WE'RE GONNA DIE!" screamed Syrus.

"Maybe we killed her!" said Jaden in an optimistic tone of voice.

"NO! THAT'S NOT A GOOD THING! NOT A GOOD THING AT ALL!" screamed Syrus.

"Oh…wait, she's moving…" said Chumley, as Alexis slowly began to struggle to her feet. "Sorry gang."

Jaden just kind of stared stupidly at nothing while looking all around the room absentmindedly, as Syrus hyperventilated and looked like he wanted to rip every single strand of hair out of his scalp one by one.

"Um…yeah…not dead…" said Alexis, massaging the point of contact on her head, slowly getting up into a sitting position. "Uh…ah…"

"WE'RE SORRY! WE'RE SO SORRY! DON'T KILL US! OR SAY MEAN THINGS TO US! OR TURN US IN OR SPIT ON OUR GRAVES OR PUT A CURSE ON US OR TRY TO KILL ANY OF OUR FUTURE CHILDREN OR-" Syrus began to rattle off in horror.

"No…it's okay…but seriously, you shouldn't hit people like…that…" said Alexis.

"Wait…you're just going to let us get away with it?" said Chumely, giving Alexis, a long, thoughtful look. "I mean, you're just going to let us off the hook? Just like that? No snide remarks or anything like that?"

"Well, if you promise not to do that again, I guess I can…" said Alexis.

"OH THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU-" said Syrus, grabbing Alexis's hand roughly, and shaking it with the force and speed of a man twice his size.

"Girl must have amnesia or something for just letting us off like that," said Chumley.

"What does cleaning products have to do with anything?" asked Jaden.

Chumley just stared at Jaden for awhile, as Syrus continued to violently thank Alexis and shake her hand.

"Or she's just nuts," said Chumley.

"THOSE CRAZY OBELISKS!" said Jaden, twirling his finger around his head.

"Why am I nuts?" asked Alexis.

"Because Obelisks hate Slifers about as much as we hate them back!" said Chumley. "They think that we're a bunch of arrogant, pea-brained, idiotic wanna-bes, and we think they're a bunch of…arrogant, pea-brained, idiotic wanna bes. No offense."

"None taken," sad Alexis, thinking that her arguments of her own dorm were similar to the apparent trend.

"Hey, what's your name anyway?" asked Jaden.

"Oh…Alexis," said Alexis. "Alexis Rhodes. It's very nice to meet you."

"I'm Jaden Yuki!" said Jaden, thrusting out a hand.

"Syrus Truesdale!" said Syrus, shaking Alexis's hand even harder.

"Chumley Huffington!" said Chumley, also sticking out a hand, which Alexis shook after shaking Jaden's hand, considering one of them was still out of commission.

"You know…it's okay…to stop shaking my hand, I mean," said Alexis, as Syrus continued to shake it.

"But…if I don't do this, you won't forgive me!" said Syrus.

"Of course I'll forgive you!" said Alexis. "You didn't do a single thing wrong!"

"…I didn't?" asked Syrus, as the hand shaking began to slow down.

"No, of course not!" said Alexis.

"Don't worry about him Lex!" said Jaden. "You see…he's kinda off kitter around Obelisks."

"Just…hero worship or something?" asked Alexis.

"No, because his older brother's an Obelisk, and he's a cold, heartless jerk!" said Jaden.

"Oh?" said Alexis, the description meeting many people she knew in her class.

"Yeah!" said Jaden. "He completely broke his heart and crushed his confidence, and he still thinks that he's worthless and pathetic, and he doesn't even care that he's in the same school as him!"

"That's terrible," said Alexis.

"Oh yeah!" said Jaden. "And he's at least elevenity million feet tall, and they say that if you look into his eyes, you'll either die or turn into a rodent!"

Silence.

"I expect that to be an exaggeration of sorts…" said Alexis. "Well, it was really nice meeting all of you guys, but I probably should get back to class, with the exam and all…"

"HOLY CRIPES, SHE'S RIGHT!" said Jaden in horror. "This is seriously cutting into my naptime! Gotta go Lex!"

"FORGIVE ME!" screamed Syrus, following Jaden down the hallway.

"Later," said Chumley, following the rest of a gang in an awkward shuffle, leaving Alexis alone in the hallway to try to get herself to her feet. Funny, she never considered that there were many sibling besides her going to this school (she thought it was a relatively rare thing). She couldn't help but think…she remembered…

"Can't get screwed around with those kinds of thoughts…not before a test," said Alexis, her head putting pressure on the still aching spot on her head. "Well, better get back. Kat's gotta be done by now…funny, you'd think an older brother with that kind of warped description would just stick out. I'm surprised I haven't met him."

---ooo---

"I really wish I could put this politely Akiro…but please get that camera out of my face," said Zane flatly.

"Hello, and welcome once again to 'Who Cares About Your Opinion?'," said Akiro, walking up to the group of desks where the trio usually sat, holding a long microphone. "I am the daring and super-good looking Akrio, and today, we look at a common practice amongst the school that most sane people call 'Duel Academy'. Politically correct thinkers label this event as 'test day', everyone else labels it a 'the tournament to see just how many people can successfully cheat off of Zane's paper'."

"Nobody's noticed why I'm on the floor and bleeding, have they?" asked Chazz, who's chair was completely tipped over, leaving him…lying on the floor and bleeding.

"Shut up, I'm getting to that," said Akiro. "Anyway, all of these potential 'cheaters' have various methods of attempting this endeavor. Glancing quick when they assume no one's looking, spyglasses, and much more unorthodox methods, which I am not at liberty to say on a low-rated fic are used to copy the answers of this test."

"I really am bleeding, you know?" said Chazz.

"Oh, would you suck it up already?" asked Akiro to Chazz.

"Hey, I found the first aid kit," said Alexis, walking back into the scene, after giving Akiro a sharp whack at the back of the head with a first aide kid, nearly knocking him over, at about the same time as Josephina timidly walked into the room. Her eyes were darting all over the room, with the sneaking suspicion that the crazy Ra girl was going to jump out of nowhere and take her down like last weekend.

"But by far the most bizarre methods of cheating are being used by a certain Kat Tillian, who is the proud holder of the only ten inch thick disciplinary file that Duel Academy actually accepted," said Akiro, leaning down right next to Chazz's desk after shooting Alexis a dirty look. "Believe me, we're all scratching our heads about that one too. Anyway, her methods of cheating are to literally take over the underside of the desk two seats away from Zane's to copy off his paper."

"Which is why Chazz is currently laying on the floor with significant injuries," said Alexis into the microphone. "She just shoved him back and took over."

"HEY! Before anyone asks, it wasn't to cheat!" said Kat, sticking her head out from under the desk. "Well…it was partially to cheat but…THIS IS THE FORT OF UNDERSTANDING!"

"The fort…of understanding?" said Akiro.

"Yuppers!" said Kat. "You see, I figure I'd get an extra edge in slamming Obelisks if I stood among them and learned their ways! You know…like those people on National Geographi-HEY! IT'S JOSIE!"

Josephina screamed at the top of her lungs, running full speed from the homicidal Ra, who jumped out from under the desk, with the intention, it appeared, to give Josephina a hug, but having seen any other displays of general friendship from Kat, Josephina didn't take her chances. She wasn't going to get slammed again.

"And in an unrelated side story, the majority of the student population is screaming this question at the top of their lungs," said Akiro, as the two continued to run around the room screaming. "WHERE THE HECK IS SAM!"

"Perhaps I can answer that," said Joku, in his usual flat, almost robotic monotone, floating cross-legged over Akiro's head.

"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING UP THERE!" screamed Akiro.

"Up where?" asked Joku, suddenly right next to Akiro, looking as if nothing had happened.

"Ah…never mind," said Akiro, getting used to the relatively little lack of sense that his situation often brought him. "Anyway…Joku. What do you mean that you can explain it?"

"Sam's one dream is to one day be in Obelisk…it's why she's always working so hard, and she's the head of the Ra female class…" said Joku. "So naturally, she'd be concentrating on doing last minute studying to get a good grade on this test, even though it's just a ranking test and not an actual dorm switch exam."

He pointed to Samantha's table, as she had her face buried in a huge textbook, looking massively absorbed.

"…okay, that actually made sense," said Akiro. "Joku, have you finally gone to see a psychiatrist or something?"

"I'm wearing a-"

"OKAY! NO MORE! NO MORE OF THINGS WE DON'T NEED TO KNOW!" yelled Akiro, covering Joku's mouth quickly with the hand that wasn't holding the microphone. "Now then…ah yes, it's that time. Before we begin the actual test, we shall have our usual deeply moving speech by the esteemed professor, Doctor Vellian Crowler. So get your earplugs ready people."

"Nobody asked for your opinion!" yelled Doctor Crowler from the teaching desk at the center of the lecture hall. He was incredibly tall and thin, with looks that were…excentric to say the least. Everything about him seemed to be just a little bit over the top, from the bright blond shade of hair, to the very frilly Obelisk Blue teaching uniform.

"Actually it's 'Who Care's About Your Opinion?', but we tend to get a lot of-" Akiro said, just as a brick came in sharp contact with his head, sending him falling backwards to the ground.

"-pair of Speedos under my uniform," Joku finished, now that his face was uncovered.

"I have another one in my drawer if any of you would like to comment," said Crowler, shoving it shut. "Anyway, may I first say that I am pleased to welcome you to your first ranking exam. Now, to be fair to all the new students, a ranking exam can be a very stressfully thing, so think of this as a practice exam for your Dorm Switch exam, an exam that you can use to raise your personal rank within the school community, possibly even getting into a higher dorm room. Even the lowest Slifer can become the highest Obelisk by dist of their efforts on the test…though the day that happens is the day winged monkeys fly out of my derriere..."

"GET ON WITH IT!" yelled Kat, stopping chasing Josephina long enough to yell at Doctor Crowler. A second later, shed just managed to dodge a brick, which just barely grazed her cheek.

"HA!" she screamed in triumph.

WHAM!

"Yes, I lied. I actually had two," said Dr. Crowler, shoving the drawer shut once again to his desk, as Kat lay twitching on the floor, and Josephina managed to successfully scramble into a seat, thus attempting to shrink down with the hope of disappearing. "Anyway, as I was saying, while this will determine your temporary rank, it's more of a practice exam than an actual test. So calm down and just do your best. HOWEVER, before we proceed, may I remind you that the rules of any other test apply. This means if you cheat, your paper will be torn up. No exceptions whatsoever. Questions?"

Silence.

"Good," said Dr. Crowler, taking a huge stack of paper off the desk. "Oh…one more thing…under instructor, I will accept no less than 'Dr. Crowler'. If I see a single 'Mrs.' on that paper, in any context whatsoever…"

He ripped a paper off the top of the stack and crushed it in his hands, flicking open a trap door on the top of his desk. He then tossed the balled up paper into the trap door, and suddenly, a tower of fire shot up from within the trapdoor, sending soot and charred bits of paper flying all over the top of the desk, until he slammed it shut.

"You know, it's technological advancements like these that make my job fun again," said Dr. Crowler, as everyone in their seats stared at the desk in horror. "Alright…once you get your test, you may begin."

"Chazz, as friendly advice, I don't think that you should sit there…" said Alexis, as Chazz picked up his chair, and went to sit back down.

"Why not?" asked Chazz. However, three seconds later, Kat streaked over, grabbed the back of Chazz's chair, and flipped it back, dumping the contents out the back of it, and bolting right back under the desk, cackling darkly.

"DR. CROWLER!" screamed Chazz. "KAT'S GONE UNDER MY DESK!"

"Oh good lord, not this early…" said Dr. Crowler angrily, sighing as he began to pass out the papers. "Ms. Tillian, go back to your spot next to Ms. Anika."

"Sorry?" said Samantha, for the first time bringing her head out from behind the pages of the text book after hearing her name.

"NEVER!" yelled Kat from under Chazz's desk. "I will unravel the inner workings of the Obelisk Dorm, and I will do it by any means necessary!"

"Well unless you can somehow get your test all the way over here without getting out from under that table, you're stuck," said Dr. Crowler from the Ra side, slapping a test paper right next to the spot next to Samantha, where Kat usually sat.

"So…you're going to play dirty, eh? Fine…" said Kat, a carnal smile suddenly blooming on her face.

"Uh oh…" said Alexis.

"POWAH!" screamed Kat, lifting the entire desk by the two back legs over her head, and using it as a combination of a club and a battering ram to charge across the room, slamming aside anyone in her path. This caused many students to scream and abandon their desks, which were taken down one by one by the desk that was wildly being swung over Kat's head. With that, she jumped in the air, snatched the paper of her desk, then used the desk that she was holding a sort of a toboggan that she slid down the stairs wildly, screeching it to a stop to where it was. Then, she slammed Chazz, who was attempting to get up with it, put it on all four legs on the floor again, then quickly darted under it.

"AND THAT'S WHY YOU CAN'T STAND IN THE WAY OF A POWAH LADY!" screamed Kat. "Witness? KAT 'DESK' TILLIAN, THE ENEMY OF ALL OBELISKS!"

"I'd say this is another tenth of an inch in the file at least…" said Dr. Crowler, looking at the smoldering remains of the entire row that Kat destroyed.

Despite the awkward shuffling to right the desks in the class, partnered with the rapid scribbling of detention notes from Dr. Crowler at his desk, Alexis was relatively calm about facing the test, with the reassurance that this wasn't going to have too drastic an effect on her standing. Also, the questions seemed relatively easy to answer in her mind, as she felt pretty confident rattling down the answers, though she heard the test got increasingly harder the farther you went. She vaguely glanced up at the other two just to see how they were doing, and one thing caught her eye.

Zane Truesdale.

CLACKrattlerattlerattle…

The pen that she was holding fell right out of her hand and rolled across her desk as she stared in open-mouthed at the name that was written, clearly and plainly as could possibly descrived on Zane's paper. Zane eventually had to meet the shocked expression. For a moment, neither of them said anything.

"Your methods are more subtle than Chazz, but not by very much," said Zane, as Chazz threw himself across Alexis's desk and began copying down all of Zane's answers one by one.

"…Truesdale…" she said.

"Yes," said Zane.

Silence, save from the scribbling from Chazz.

"You're brother goes to this school…" she said.

"Which I find pretty surprising that he made it in," said Zane. "Any reason why you're bringing this up?"

Alexis just stared at him.

"Bathroom," she said, getting up without a second thought, without even bothering to look back, or to answer the question.

Silence.

"What was that?" asked Zane, as Chazz grabbed Zane's paper, erased his name, and wrote 'Chazz Princeton' where it used to be.

---ooo---

Chazz: We're seriously going to drop off the chapter on that kind of note?

Zane: I don't think we have much choice in the matter

Chazz: Look, I don't care, as long as we don't have to get sappy and angsty and other such un-masculine garbage.

Zane: Whatever you say captain.

Chazz: Next time, it's…HEY!

Zane: What? I'm letting you announce the chapter.

Chazz: WELL IT'S NO FUN UNLESS YOU JUST GIVE IT UP WITHOUT A FIGHT!

Zane:…just say it.

Chazz: MAKE ME!

Zane: Fine…next time-

Chazz: GAAAAAAAAAAH! (Tackles Zane, and starts a fist fight)

Alexis: (Looking on) Idiots.