A/N: Thanks to Andrew Laplante for this request. Yes, I know, this is becoming over run with Gilbert and Sullivan. Hope you don't mind!
Never Mind the Why and Wherefore - A parody of Never Mind the Why and Wherefore from HMS Pinafore
In Erik's house, Raoul and Erik are arguing over who should marry Christine.
Raoul: Never mind the why and wherefore.
She's the one to choose and therefore
Though your lasso may look mighty
But I can't say that about your brain.
Though your house looks quite untidy
And your mind can be insane!
Both: Fighting you all day and all night.
Loathing you with all my might.
How I hate you for you're stealing
She, the humble fiddler's daughter!
Raoul: For his humble Swedish daughter.
Erik: She's his gallant Swedish daughter.
Raoul: And I met her by the water.
Erik: And I'm the one who taught her!
Both: Let the air with hate be laden.
Rend with strife the air above.
For she is a pretty maiden.
And I'm the man who owns her love!
Erik: Never mind the why and wherefore.
She's the one to choose and therefore
Though my lasso's not impressive,
I'm afraid you scarcely pass
'Cause she's looking for a man who teaches a great music class!
Both: Fighting you all day and all night.
Loathing you with all my might.
How I hate you for you're stealing
She the humble fiddler's daughter!
Raoul: For his humble Swedish daughter.
Erik: She's his gallant Swedish daughter.
Raoul And I met her by the water.
Erik: And I'm the one who taught her.
Both: Let the air with hate be laden.
Rend with strife the air above.
For she is a pretty maiden
And I'm the man who owns her love!
Christine enters and notices the quarrel. She interrupts, singing:
Never mind the why and wherefore.
I'm the one to choose and therefore
You are both such real good men
But which of you is great?
I hope whichever one he is,
He'll give me a good fate!
Raoul and Erik: Fighting you all day and all night.
Loathing you with all my might.
How I hate for you're stealing
She, the humble fiddler's daughter.
Raoul: For his humble Swedish daughter.
Erik: She's his gallant Swedish daughter.
Raoul: And I met her by the water.
Erik: And I'm the one that taught her.
Christine: Let the air with joy be laden.
Raoul: No, it's filled with strife instead!
Christine: You two think I'm a pretty maiden.
Erik: That is the whole point of this fight!
All: Rend with songs the air above
To the man who owns her love.
Rend with songs the air above
To the man who owns her love!