Title: A Whitelighter's Priority

Author: rachelAbendstern

Summary: Shaken from Bianca's death, Chris leashs out at the city. Spike finds himself once again in the position of mediator.

Spoilers: Season 6 Charmed; BtVS up to and including 'The Gift'

Disclaimer: Neither Buffy nor Charmed is mine, and I don't make any money with it. Lily though belongs to me XP.
The intro is taken out of 'Mother Earth' by Within Temptaion.

15. Rock Bottom

With every breath and all the choices that we make
We're only passing through on her way
I find my strength believing that your soul lives on
Until the end of time I carry it with me

Mommy's gone. The bad man hurt her and now she's gone.

Lily didn't understand much of what had happened before, but she knew that without a doubt. She wanted her Daddy! Why did he leave her with those strange people? Why did they leave Mommy behind? Where did the big scary man go? And who were those people? There were so many questions swirling around in her head...

The little girl kept staring at the tall blonde man who had spoken to her Daddy. He seemed nice. Lily could tell he was a demon. No human she had ever seen could change the colour of their eyes into glowing yellow but she had seen some demons doing it. Again, she might be too young to understand many things but she understood that, too. And he seemed to like Daddy. He was using many bad words now but from what she could understand he was worried.

Maybe, Daddy was hurt, too? But he would come back, wouldn't he? She had missed him so much and she didn't know why he had to leave for so long, but he came back just as he promised. So he wouldn't leave her alone now, right?

"Hey there, Sweetie." Lily was startled by the voice next to her. She hadn't seen the red-haired woman walking towards her. She had a kind smile and Lily instantly liked her. The little girl rubbed her long sleeves over her face to get rid of the tears and sniffed slightly before she answered.

"Hello. Who are you?"

"I'm Paige. I am a friend of your father's." Lily felt like a weight fell off her small shoulders; a weight she hadn't even known was there. So Daddy didn't leave her with just any people but with friends. Silly her.

"What's your name?" Paige asked while she was kneeling down in front of Lily.

"Lily."

She jumped when suddenly lightning blinded her again and the loud thunder almost split her ears. Where was Daddy? He knew she didn't like thunderstorms. He always orbed away when he was upset about something because more often than not, storms broke loose when he was really upset. Maybe that's why he left today? Did Daddy cause that storm? He had to be very, very angry or sad for a storm like that. But what could make him so angry and sad?

Losing Mommy, the little girl suddenly realized.

Lily shuddered when she heard the wind rattle on the windows and heard another thunder rolling over the house. When she saw the nice woman holding her arms out for her, she flew into them without a second thought. Clinging to Paige, she listened to the other grown-ups talking.

666

"What just happened?"

Piper had a hard time making herself heard over William's consistent and colourful swearing and the roaring of the storm outside. Making her way quickly to where her son had just dropped his force field, the witch had the funny feeling that, if only he knew who to leash out on, Wil would gladly have torn someone limb from limb. Actually, it told volumes of the bond they had unwittingly established with the demon that he didn't just take his anger out on one of them.

She picked Wyatt up and took a long look at him, unable to quench the sudden uneasy feeling she got. What could have happened in the future for Chris to become so... homicidal? The witch was well aware of the fact that her young Whitelighter had quite a few dark spots in his personality but she had never seen him like that before. And what had Wyatt to do with anything? The way the vampire had talked the young half-breed out of his rage had clearly suggested that Chris knew Wyatt and that Wyatt... No, she wasn't following down that path! That was just ridiculous...

Tearing her gaze away from her little boy and forcefully stomping on that queasy feeling in her guts she turned to see Phoebe and Leo still standing shell-shocked whilst Paige picked up the little girl Chris had left behind. Which raised another two questions...

If that little girl was who Piper presumed she was – namely Chris' daughter – where was Bianca? Unfortunately, the queasy feeling only intensified with that question, giving her a pretty good idea of what the answer would sound like even though the Charmed One tried with all her might to deny the obvious. It was a whole lot safer to ask her other question...

"Where did he go?"

666

The sudden storm was unnerving her. Unnerving her almost as much as Chris' uncontrolled rage and grief had only moments ago.

No, that was as wrong as it could get. Chris' feelings had been unnerving on a completely different level. Phoebe had occasionally been able to sense something from the young Whitelighter, whenever he had been in enough emotional turmoil to hijack the empathy blocking potion she was sure he had taken. But nothing before had prepared her for the sheer, gut-wrenching all-consuming pain she had felt from Chris when his eyes had so unexpectedly turned into those eerie bottomless holes. The empath had been so caught up in the other's emotions she hadn't even heard what Spike had told the boy to calm him down.

"Where did the storm come from?" Phoebe asked nervously, jumping together with the dark-haired girl in Paige's arms when deafening thunder struck once again.

The vampire stopped mid-rant and turned a disbelieving stare at her. Where his threats and curses had failed to attract anyone's attention anymore, his sudden silence succeeded.

"Bloody hell! Don't tell me you haven't found that one out yet!"

Okay, she still worried about Chris. But she was seriously getting pissed at him. Did everyone know more about their Whitelighter than the ones he came here to help?

Shaking her head in confusion, Phoebe stuttered. "Wh... what? Did I miss something?"

Surprisingly enough, it was Leo who quietly told her: "Chris is the elemental witch we couldn't find."

"Congratulations!" Spike sneered, words thick with sarcasm. "You just figured that out? One would think the change of weather every time the boy is upset would have been a clue."

Oh. That would explain it. Although Chris didn't really seem to have those powers under control if he could provoke a thunderstorm like that every time his emotions were running wild.

"You know, this is so not fair!" the woman suddenly exploded. "How come you seem to know so much about our Whitelighter and we don't? Even Dad knows more than us!"

And there were the amber eyes again. She really should know better than to challenge an already aggravated vampire.

"Because I bloody well pay attention!" the demon rounded on her, hissing furiously.

Ducking her head in shame, Phoebe was reminded of her father's words. She had to admit that both men probably had a point so she refrained from arguing any further.

Besides, they really did have other things to worry about. Like an emotionally instable half-witch with enough uncontrolled wild magic to cause the worst storm of the century out there.

666

Leo could not deny the twinge of guilt he felt at the demon's words. He had been so obsessed with proving Chris guilty of – what? Dishonesty most likely or using his family as a means to an end – that he completely ignored everything about the young man that pointed towards another truth.

The Elder had been proven right about the dishonesty tonight but although he resented the fact that Chris had not deemed it necessary to tell them about his true nature, Leo just could not bring himself to be angry with the boy. Much.

The price Chris had had to pay was simply too high to be gloating about such a petty thing as being proven right. The young man had lost his wife today. Leo didn't understand much of what had transpired only moments ago – didn't want to understand – but even he could tell where Chris' anguish stemmed from. He didn't even want to imagine the same thing happening to him.

Looking at the girl Paige was holding Leo racked his brains over how he would explain that to his fellow Elders. Allowing Chris to stay here after the Titans had been vanquished had been an expected, but not unanimous decision. Convincing them to let his daughter stay as well would be that much harder to accomplish. But the earlier events clearly suggested it would be plain irresponsible to send her back.

Leo wondered if Chris had intentionally left his daughter behind or if he simply didn't have enough control over his powers to allow him to use them consciously. He shuddered, thinking of the harm Chris could unwillingly cause.

Looking out the window to see a jagged lightning bolt split the sky in two in a matter of milliseconds, he shuddered again. He was fairly certain Chris didn't have any control over his powers at the moment. What could the boy possibly do if he had full control?

One more reason to find him as quickly as possible...

Somehow, all this eerily reminded him of Piper's time as goddess when she finally understood that Leo had become an Elder and could not come back to her.

"Well, what are you waiting for?"

The sudden voice roused the Whitelighter out of his thoughts, reminding him that he had more urgent matters to worry about right now. Spike's golden eyes glared at him, the ridges on his forehead pushing forward and teeth elongating into sharp fangs. It was a sight to behold but not one he wanted to experience more times than absolutely necessary.

"Do your Whitelighter thing, for god's sake!" the demon growled angrily and with all too obvious impatience. "Sense for him! Come morning there won't be a San Francisco left if he continues like this."

666

The storm was raging over the city. There was thunder and lightning and rain and a wind so strong he wondered why it had not pushed him over the cliffs yet.

He didn't know how he got here.

He remembered silence, remembered rage and hate and darkness; and then a calm presence, pulling him away from the edge of the abyss he felt himself stumbling into. And he remembered the frightened quivering of the little girl in his arms when the wind was rising and knew that he had to get away from there; had to get away before something irrevocable happened.

And the next thing he knew he was standing on the cliffs over the bay, the huge frame of Golden Gate Bridge towering over the water, obscured by dark clouds and heavy bouts of rain.

The hate was gone. But in its wake it left a furious rage. And a pain so raw, so profound, so paralyzing that even breathing hurt.

666

"Don't you think I haven't already tried!"

Wow. Never knew that Elder had it in him, Spike thought somewhat impressed by Leo's sudden burst of temper. However he was not impressed enough to stop growling in anger at the helplessness of the boy's family. Weren't they supposed to be powerful or something? They were his family for god's sake and couldn't even find him?

"There has got to be something we can do!" the youngest witch exclaimed, the concern that was evident in her voice partly consoling the vampire to their lot.

She was sitting at a table, a map of San Francisco in front of her and a crystal pendulum suspended in her hand above it while Chris' little girl in her lap was staring at him in... was that awe?

Realizing he had slipped into game-face some time during the last few minutes Spike couldn't help a nervous chuckle. So the girl came after her father more than her grandfather. That was a relief – and might save Chris from being ripped into pieces once he got a hold on the boy! He understood that Chris had secrets. But how could he keep something as important as this from them, from him? How was he supposed to protect his family if they didn't trust him?

666

Shaking her head in frustration, Paige let the scrying crystal drop on the table without any clue as to where their young Whitelighter had disappeared to.

"This is pointless!" she complained agitatedly, tightening her grip on Lily who was still sitting quietly in her lap.

"Something about this storm is blocking our every attempt at finding him! I even had Lily's help scrying for him and nothing!"

"Perhaps he just doesn't want to be found," her empath sister sighed wearily, rubbing her forehead as if her head was aching while she was pacing in front of the table.

Anyway, this seemed to be everyone's favourite occupation nowadays; pacing. Phoebe was pacing right in front of her, driving her to madness, Leo was pacing in front of the window, Piper – well Piper had an excuse for her pacing since she tried to keep Wyatt preoccupied, and Spike was alternately watching the storm from the window and walking over to the table to look over her shoulder.

"Well, that's just his bad then!" Piper said determinedly. "We can't just let him devastate the whole city because he hasn't got his powers under control!"

Although it seemed like an eternity since Chris had wisped away for lack of better terms, they had been searching for the young man less than ten minutes. It wasn't a long time but with the havoc that could be wrecked by the storm they were kind of in a hurry.

"Yeah, well, you had them under control that time and you still almost destroyed the city."

At her sister's pointed look Paige raised her hands in defence. "I'm just saying."

"Where does he go around here when he wants to be alone?"

Damn that vampire! One of these days she was going to buy him a little bell for around his neck to hear him coming, she thought as Spike's voice suddenly sounded right beside her.

But it was a valid question. Where did the boy go when he wanted to forget about the world around him? Any other time her first answer would have been Sunnydale, but as the storm was still raging outside, Chris had to be somewhere in San Francisco.

"Besides Sunnydale? I don't know." she confessed unhappily.

"I know."

At first, Paige looked around in surprise at this new voice before she realized that it was Lily who had piped up. Apparently Spike had been quicker on the uptake as he was already crouched in front of the little girl, looking intently at her with glowing amber eyes. Surprisingly enough, Chris' daughter didn't seem to be intimidated by the demon – or not so surprisingly seeing who her parents were.

"You do, luv?" Spike asked unusually serious. "Can you show me?"

What happened next startled all of them. One second, Lily was still sitting in Paige's lap with the vampire crouched in front of them; the next the little girl grabbed the man's hands and promptly shimmered out of the attic with him.

666

Alright. That was not exactly what he meant when he asked the little girl to show him where her father might have disappeared to.

Spike found himself on a cliff high above the bay, dark clouds and rain obscuring the light of the sun he felt in his old bones was about to rise. The two of them were drenched in a matter of seconds, the wind pulling at their clothes and hair with undiminished fury.

Standing up he looked around the bare plateau, spying the boy only a few feet away from the edge – way too near the steep cliff for his comfort – while the girl pressed herself against his legs in fright of the storm.

"Alright, luv." Spike had to yell to make himself heard over the howling wind. "You brought us here. Any idea what to do now?"

He wasn't actually expecting an answer from the kid. He was just thinking loud because honestly, he was at an absolute loss of what to do, now that he had found the raging young man. This time, the vampire didn't have the slightest clue what he could do to calm the boy down. If he would have been crying or yelling or cursing or brooding, then maybe. Now though he just felt helpless. And it was not a feeling he liked.

But to his surprise Lily suddenly looked up at him with her huge brown eyes, nodded slowly and turned around again to face her father, still tightly clutching his duster in both her hands. The boy hadn't noticed them yet, standing with his back to them and facing the waterside, his head bowed and hands balled into tight fists.

"Christopher Perry Halliwell!"

Spike almost jumped when the girl shouted right beside him with her high-pitched voice at the top of her lungs.

"You stop that nonsense this instance!" the childish voice demanded in a tone so much like an adult it would have been funny if not for the circumstances.

It had the desired effect however. Chris whirled around, staring at them uncomprehendingly for a moment, with eyes of swirling darkness.

"Go away, Spike!" the witch's hoarse voice sounded once more in his head.

And suddenly, at seeing the overwhelming desperation and furious anger in Chris' pale face, the vampire knew what to do.

"I can't do that, pet."

He pried Lily off his legs, hoping the little girl had enough sense to stand back even though he could sense her fear and walked slowly towards his young friend.

"If you want to fight someone," Spike began calmly, trusting that Chris would understand him despite the roaring of thunder and wind, "you'll have to fight me!"

666

"Oh that's just great!" Paige threw her hands up, partly in annoyance, partly in defeat.

"Now we lost all three of them."

"Did she just shimmer?" her oldest sister interrupted her startled, pointing wide-eyed at the spot where Spike had been kneeling only seconds before. "That little girl just shimmered!"

"Well, her mother was a Phoenix." Phoebe pointed out, already going for the scrying crystal.

Unfortunately, she had to reach over her little sister to do so. Paige only just managed to steady her when she was about to fall onto her lap.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Phoebe smiled sheepishly at her. "We can scry for Lily. She's a witch, too."

Mmh. Now that was an idea.

Two minutes later Phoebe grabbed Paige by her hand and told her unsuspecting brother-in-law in a bout of thoughtlessness: "You stay here and take care of my two nephews and their mother!"

Paige had enough common sense to orb then and there to the cliffs they had found before the shock wore off and Piper could jinx her loud-mouthed sister into next week, leaving a fuming Charmed One and one stunned Elder behind.

666

The quite physical blow she took when the winds almost knocked her off her feet was the first thing she noticed as they materialized on top of the cliffs. If the storm was raging over the city it seemed to have culminated right here where Phoebe and her sister were standing now, lightning striking every few seconds all around them, the thunder ringing in their ears.

The empath almost toppled to her knees a second time when her powers kicked in and she was all of a sudden swamped in a wave of unshielded, uncontrolled emotions. A steadying hand on her upper arm helped her to regain control over her unpredictable powers. Looking around still shaken, Phoebe finally caught sight of whom they had come here to find.

"What are they doing?" Her younger sister cried out over the storm, outraged, worried and confused all at once. Not that Phoebe could blame her.

Spike and Chris were at each other's throats, trading blow after blow in a vicious dance of deadly skill and long honed reflexes. Or so it seemed; until the woman noticed that the vampire was actually holding back, mostly intent on defending himself with only the occasional fierce kick or punch in between. Suddenly she understood what was going on here.

Quickly snatching a handful of rain-soaked cloth she was only just able to keep Paige from charging right into the middle of the fight.

Spinning her head around, the other young woman accused her in frustration: "What are you doing?"

"Anger management." Phoebe explained in a calm voice. Or as calm as possible with the wind still howling around them.

"Don't you see, Paige? Whenever Chris' emotions run high he loses control over his elemental powers. Spike knew that. He's trying to focus Chris' anger and pain on something else." Turning around, she realized that the storm was already losing some of its fury.

"And I guess it's working."

Once again turning her attention towards the two opponents, Phoebe watched in rapt fascination. They were excellent fighters, both of them, moving with the grace and apparent ease of wildcats. The woman winced in sympathy at a particularly strong kick to Chris' side when she became aware of her sister frantically looking around the plateau, searching for something.

"Where's Lily?"

Oh damn! Chris' little daughter! She had completely forgotten about her.

Finally they spied her; the little girl was crouching behind a small boulder, quivering, with her hands over her ears. The two sisters hastily hurried over and pried her away from her shelter and into their arms.

For a moment, Phoebe felt anger coursing through her, anger at her young Whitelighter and the way he had just abandoned his daughter with strangers. Then again, she had experienced first hand what state the young man had been in – and still was, to some degree. The only thing they could hope for now was that Spike was able to bring Chris back to his senses and quickly.

666

The darkness was fading.

And with it the burning rage that had fuelled his attacks.

He was dimly aware of strong arms coming around him when he slid to the ground, the last of his strength dissolving, leaving him bereft and helpless. The only thing left now was his pain. Pain and guilt over the deaths he had caused with his leaving.

He had left them. He had left them on their own and his grandfather had paid with his life for Chris' mistake. And Bianca...

Oh god, Bianca!

Slowly, a voice filtered through his confused mind. He tried to focus on what it was saying only to get away from the nauseating guilt.

"... not your fault."

That was Spike's voice. After that first recognition, the young man became aware of the demon's arms that were still around him and the faint scent of cigarettes and dust he always associated with the vampire. Spike spoke again and this time, Chris understood everything he said.

"It's not your fault, Chris! You can change it, that's what you came here for."

There were tears running down his face and he had not even noticed until now. Chris could not believe him. He tried to get away but Spike refused to let go. After a short struggle the young witch simply surrendered and burrowed even deeper into the embrace.

And Spike held on.

666

Sunnydale, a short while later...

She watched from the door of her darkened bedroom as the bleached blonde demon she had known for some time now covered the exhausted young man with a layer of blankets, stroking through the dark strands of hair with surprising gentleness.

A few years ago she would never have believed had anyone told her that Spike could be gentle, caring even. Now, she didn't know if she was glad or furious about that Initiative chip that had had such an impact on the vampire's... unlife. Seeing Spike this way made her wonder what the human had been like before he had been turned, if even the demon could still feel those kind of emotions that had always been the definition of 'humanity' in her mind.

In a way she was angry at the Initiative for what they had done to the vampire. Spike didn't belong into a cage, even if it was an invisible one, binding him in a way solid bars of steel would never be able to. She was furious about it the way she was furious about the cages keeping wolves, tigers and all the other predators at the zoo from their natural environment – knowing that they didn't belong in there but nevertheless glad she didn't have to face them without the security of those cages.

Although she had to admit that Spike seemed to truly care about her little family, helping them even if he didn't have to. She was grateful he had kept them safe all this time and continued to do so out of his own free will.

Something nudged her upper thigh and she looked down only to see the large, doe-brown eyes of Chris' little girl. She was grateful for the young Whitelighter as well even if she didn't truly understand the weird friendship he had developed with the vampire. But she could tell that the he had been a good influence on her friends, especially her sister and a certain redheaded witch who had taken her death a lot worse than Buffy had ever expected. If not for Chris, she might have ended up a living corpse for all that she knew. It was enough to make the former Slayer worry about him now, although she didn't really know him.

The two strange witches who had brought Spike and Chris here – surprising herself and Willow, who had summoned her friend as she did now and again – had left a few moments ago, worry clearly edged in their features. But Spike had all but thrown them out, showing an over-protectiveness towards the young Whitelighter Buffy had only ever seen in his treatment of her little sister. It was almost ridiculous when she really thought about it; Spike was a demon, body and – for lack of a better terminology – soul and Chris was a freaking angel, or half of it anyways...

Sighing, she picked up the little girl.

"Hey there, sweety," she said in what she hoped to be a soothing voice. "You want to go to your daddy?"

The little girl nodded wordlessly and the young woman made her way towards her old bed, coming to stand next to Spike. Lily hadn't talked much since she came here and Buffy couldn't really blame the kid. There was much she had to work through and being surrounded by strangers probably did not help a whole lot but there wasn't anything they could do about it at the moment. Her mother was... well, not there and her father was in no condition to do anything for the next few hours at the least.

"I think Willow wants to talk to you," Buffy explained the vampire, ignoring his surprised look for now.

"Something about an agreement the two of you had." She couldn't help the small mirthful smile at the thought of what was waiting for Spike out there.

"I'll look after those two for a while."

666

The little one was certainly one of a kind, Spike thought as he stood up, absentmindedly ruffling her dark locks. This whole time she hadn't been afraid of him in the least, not even when she saw his true face. Of course, there had been so much going on that morning that the vampire was not sure whether the little girl really knew how she was supposed to react around anybody here.

He didn't have time to contemplate anymore however, because, as soon as he had gotten out the room a furious small redhead immediately blew up in his face.

Well... that was to say, Willow didn't so much blew up in his face as kick his shin once he was in her reach. Hard.

"Bloody hell! What was that for?" Damn that woman!

Instead of shrinking back from suddenly yellow eyes though, Willow accused him furiously: "You did it again!"

Huh? "What? I didn't do anything!"

Throwing her hands up in despair, the witch retorted just as heatedly as before: "Well, that's just it! I thought we were clear, you'd tell us when there's any kind of trouble with you guys!"

"I did. You said I was overreacting."

That one took the wind out of her sails for a second. But only for a second. She quickly regained some composure.

"Well... Still, you could have told us as soon as you knew for sure!"

Spike looked at the little woman in a mixture of amusement, pride and annoyance before heading down to the kitchen without another word, looking for a little breakfast.

Whatever.

666

This was not good!

Gideon had spied on the sisters ever since they had called Leo down to earth – again. And he didn't like the new development concerning the Charmed Ones' new Whitelighter. He didn't like it one bit!

There was another half-breed, another creature that should never have been born, running loose on earth! The more he thought about it, the more obscene the idea of a Whitelighter-hybrid appeared to be. There was not much that could be done about Wyatt now – at least nothing easy – but once the mess with that twice-blessed devil was resolved, he would have time enough to find out who exactly Chris' parents were and prevent... yeah, well, that from happening.

Apart from Leo – who had been taken care of – there was no other Whitelighter who dared defy the rules taking a mortal lover, at least not that Gideon was aware of. Of course, that was the problem. If he had been aware of Patricia Halliwell's secret relationship with her own Whitelighter, Sam, the Elder would have made sure to stop that nonsense, thus, Paige Matthews would never have been born either. As it were, Paige proofed to be too valuable to regret that mistake when she made her first appearance after Prue's death. Even Gideon was not foolish enough to try and break the Power of Three just because he didn't approve of the woman's parentage.

Wyatt and Chris though were on another sheet completely. Wyatt's powers were simply too dangerous to be allowed to fall into the wrong hands. It was as simply as that. He would not allow letting the Dark Side get her dirty hands on a witch that strong, by any means necessary!

And the same went for Chris, from what he had seen of the young man's powers tonight. He could not be allowed to ever use those kind of powers against the council and, judging by the contempt Chris unsuccessfully tried to conceal whenever he had to deal with them, Gideon was not too sure the young man would not be willing to do just that when pushed into a corner. For example when the Elder had finally found a way to get rid of Chris' self-proclaimed little charge...

Well, the Elder would deal with preventing another abortion when this whole mess with the Twice-Blessed was resolved to his satisfaction. And that included that little demon-half-breed as well. Meanwhile, he just had to make sure that Chris was not a threat to him anymore. Preferably by finding a way of stripping his powers.

He had to find an ally!

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Meanwhile, in a certain manor...

"You are what!"

Tbc

A/N:…I told you it would get worse.

Does it help any if I say I am truly deeply sorry for keeping you in suspense for waaayyy too long? Because I am. I didn't mean to take so long but along with having to prepare for exams, I was struck by a severe case of writer's block. I knew what I wanted to write but the words just kept eluding me. I hope you liked the new chapter nevertheless.

And sorry, but I couldn't help the last two lines… :)

As for reviews, I don't have enough time now to reply to them all – my father is practically breathing down my neck because he wants the computer all for himself tonight. I'll answer you all next time. And yes, there will be a next time. Like I said, I want to finish the story, it will just take a while.

Let me just say a huge huge THANK YOU to all of you who reviewed and a big I AM SO SORRY to all of you who were waiting for almost 4 months for this chapter…

P.S: Whoever asked if the Darklighter in my other story 'Fate's Weird Ways' was the one from 'Courtship of Wyatt's father': you were right, the same one :)