Here it is Chapter Four of To Understand. Now that I think about it, this is actually a really good title for the fic…hmm.

To Understand: Part Four

Confusion and Trust

By Harmony283

Reviews Good: 4 (wow the most I've EVER had for a Chapter!)

Syntia-I'm glad you liked the Zelloyd part in this chapter. Out of every couple I'll ever write about this is the hardest one for me to get right (mostly because, like I said before, I haven't had Zelos as my highest relationship character so I don't know much of what happens).

DraNKa-Oh, you aren't getting enough sleep? Ack! I'm sorry! Um, well, here's the next Chapter…and yes I'd like it if Mithos helped me get to sleep at night too…

Mizuki Hikari-Well…okay! Here's the next Chapter! I hope you like it!

Viaroura Fox-Yup it's a Gethos fan-fic…not only that, it's my first and one of the only ones I've found on this site. And this one should have a happy ending! And hey! You reviewed for my other ToS fan fic too! Well, anyways I hope you like this Chapter too…

Reviews Bad: (Still none! That's good!)

Disclaimer: sigh I don't own ToS, Namco does, so please don't sue me.

Authors Note: Well, I'm on Part Four now. Now it's back to Genis and Mithos' POV's. Though I have to say this gets kind of weird at one point--darn me and my overly imaginative mind. But, well, anyway…I hope you like it like the other three chapters. And what exactly is this 'immense power' inside of Genis?

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Genis' POV

"This immense power. What…is it?"

I gulp softly, staring up at my friend. I didn't want to be like the rest and lie to him…but…he would worry if I said that…that…actually, what would I say?

'Nothing, don't say a thing! Oww…why'd you hold me back anyway? It's because of that that he's worried!'

I shook my head, wanting so badly to tell the voice that she--I was pretty sure the voice was a she now--was wrong.

'How dare you think that I'm wrong! And by the way, he's pinning you down to the mattress and he's really close to you…hmm, naughty, naughty.'

I flushed crimson at her words, looking anywhere but at Mithos' curious/worried gaze.

"Look at me, Genis." He whispered, unpinning one of my arms so that he could turn my face towards him.

I do and he seems to realize exactly how close we are. But it doesn't make him move he just blushes.

"I…" my voice seems to not be working, I'm so embarrassed and he's…so close…my mind getting fuzzy.

'My you really are a naughty boy. But really, you have to tell him not to get so close.'

"What?" I barely whisper this, Mithos looks at me questioningly, moving to pin my wrist back on the bedspread. I flush as he leans down closer to me.

"What's wrong…? Why won't you tell me?" His grip tightens, and I wince. He notices, but doesn't let go. Now I'm scared.

'Look just tell him you're uncomfortable with him so close!'

"I…can't…"

"You can't what?"

"L-let go…it…hurts…"

He immediately lets go of my wrists and sits up. He's now straddling my waist, looking down at me, his turquoise eyes filled with concern.

"Genis…" he pleads. It makes me want to cry for some reason. I don't want him to worry, but I don't want to lie and say everything's fine if it isn't…

"Mithos…I can't…"

He bends down, touching my face gently with his fingertips, making me blush again.

"Tell me why."

"Because you'd worry and I don't want you to worry."

"But I don't mind…worrying about you…about someone…I care about." He smiled, his eyes softened as he twirled a strand of hair around his finger.

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Mithos' POV

"But I don't mind…worrying about you…about someone…I care about." I smiled down at the boy, twirling a strand of his silver-white hair around my finger, loving the feeling of it. It was always so soft and smooth. A little unkempt but that was to be expected.

He seems so…confused. I guess he must be. Even though he's mature and intelligent beyond his years, he's still only twelve years old. Whereas I'm…four thousand years older than he is. He hasn't even gone through puberty yet and he's already in a relationship.

But then I have to question if this really is a relationship at all.

The fact that we're on opposite sides of the same battle puts us in a bind for time we can see each other in. His friends would start getting suspicious after a while…and Pronyma, gods if she found out--

"Um…"

Genis' soft voice snaps me out of whatever state I was in, "Ah--yes?" I focus on him and notice he seems…more subdued. He's actually rather relaxed and--so cute…so…

NO!

I can't think like that!

But…he's…so…vulnerable, I wonder…has he ever been kissed before?

I lean down, gently placing my forehead on his as I had done earlier. I see him freeze in worry, I shake my head, "No…I'm fine…" He then blushes, obviously noticing something in my voice.

I brush my lips over his lightly…

But I can't!

I promised myself I wouldn't be like Zelos and kiss the one I love before I--

But it was just too tempting. Especially when he gasped.

I back away slightly; his expression is one of slight bewilderment, and…something else. I smirk and lean in again, brushing my lips over his once more. This time I add a little pressure to them.

I backed up slightly, smiling at him once more and was about to lean down and kiss him…

When, thanks to my angelic hearing, I heard footsteps.

Crap.

"What…is it…?" Genis asked as I hurriedly got off of him. I stare over at the doorway.

"Mithos…?" his weak voice calls out from the bed as he sits up.

"Footsteps."

Genis' eyes widened, "Wha--whose?"

"I dunno…it's…who else is here besides Lloyd and Zelos?"

"Colette."

"Colette."

"She…might just be…checking on Lloyd. She hasn't…seen him all day."

"Regardless, I…might have to leave soon." I couldn't look at him as I said this. I knew he would be sad, and I didn't want to see it.

I hated it when he was sad.

The footsteps got louder, but they stopped before they reached Genis' room. So Colette really was just going to go see Lloyd.

"Are Lloyd and Zelos sharing a room?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah! I got lucky and didn't have to share. Colette didn't have to share either. So, no, she won't find it weird that they're in the same room. Though…" suddenly his face turned a bright shade of red. He shook his head vigorously murmuring, "Shut up" to himself.

"What?" then I smirked, "Oh, I see. You're worried she'll find them in a compromising position?"

Almost as soon as I said that, a yelp could be heard from the other room, followed by a 'Wait Colette!'

A few minutes in silence we could see Colette running out in the snow by Genis' window. She seemed to be extremely pale. Lloyd was seen following after her, along with Zelos, who was following at a much slower pace. The two boys' clothes, from what I could tell, seemed slightly askew, as if they had thrown them on in a hurry.

Which I'm sure they did.

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Genis POV

'Well this certainly will be amusing'

I flinched, "Could you just leave me alone for a second?" I realized a little too late that I had said this outloud…and Mithos was now staring at me.

"You want me to leave?"

"Wha--no! Not you!"

"Not me…? Then who were you talking to?" His eyes, which had held some humor in the events that had just transpired, now were icy cold…like Yggdrasills' eyes.

Oh wait, they were one in the same…it was still hard for me to believe that.

"…Uh…well…it's…"

'Oh great…he's coming over here again. Thanks a bunch Genis! Do you know what'll happen if he so happens to find me?'

I bit my tongue to keep from answering. I really did want to know but…

Mithos was now standing in front of me. He was a good two inches taller than I was by now…why was I noticing this?

"Um…"

"Genis, what's going on in that mind of yours? You're a smart person, can't you tell what's going on? Can't you tell if someone's controlling you? And if you can…then why are you letting them?"

"Them? Well…I don't really…have…control…"

"Control?"

"N-No…I don't…she's just…" Suddenly my vision blurred. The ground seemed to be rising up under me…was that normal?

'Genis! Get a hold of yourself! You're going to faint if you don't!'

Too late…

I was already falling.

"Genis…!" I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around me, breaking my fall. Good, Mithos caught me. It would've hurt if I hit the floor…

"Genis…are you okay? What happened?" Mithos' voice held urgency in it, but it was getting farther and farther away.

'Genis! Wake up! Come on!' I felt a hand shaking my shoulder…

"Nnn…five more minutes…"

'NO! not five more minutes! You need to get out of here!'

"Huh?" I got up and looked around. The first thing I noticed was that I wasn't in the hotel room. I was in…wait, was this a…

mirror?

'Ah good! You're awake! Are you…okay? You don't look hurt.' I turned to look beside me, there, standing there was a girl with white hair and silver eyes garbed in a plain white dress that seemed slightly too big for her. She looked to be around eight or nine years old.

"Who…? Wait, a sec…your voice--you're the same girl that--"

'Talks to you in your head? Yes, I am. My name is Feral, nice to meet you finally, Genis.'

"So…Feral, where are we?"

'In Nifhliems Mirror.'

"Nifhliems Mirror? So is this why the floors and ceiling and the walls are reflecting us?'

Feral nodded her head, 'Yes that's the reason'

"You're…you're talking but your lips aren't moving. Why is that?"

'Remember when Mithos said you might be put under a curse by someone?'

"Uh, yeah, but what does that have to do with anything?"

'I…am put under a curse…or rather, a bind. It…prevents me from taking my human form in the world that you live in.'

"A bind? So you're…bound inside this mirror?"

Feral nodded her head, "Yes, I am. My, aren't you smart?'

"Well you said yourself that you couldn't take human form in the world I live and this isn't the world I live in."

Feral nodded her head, 'Well, yes that's true. But since this isn't the world you live in then you have to get out.'

"Ah--but how exactly do I do that? I don't see an exit anywhere."

'No…but there is a way out.'

"And where would that be? I'm sure Mithos is worried about me."

'Yes, I'm sure he is. Here.' Feral held out an item…it was a--actually what was it?

"What is that?"

It was spherical in shape, and looked about the same size as a Cruxis Crystal. But it was clear, almost white in hue.

'A Cruxis Crystal.'

I gawked at her, "A Cruxis Crystal? What are you doing with a Cruxis Crystal?"

'I…It was…my masters…when he was alive a little over twelve years ago. Back then…it was a regular exsphere…but he…after he…after he found out about his illness, he gave it to me for safekeeping. And…as you can probably tell from my appearance, I'm not a normal human, elf, or half-elf. That is why it turned into a Cruxis Crystal.'

"Um…so…your master…he's dead so why did he give his exsphere to you? I mean, isn't he still 'alive' in it or something?"

Feral looked from me to the exsphere in her hand, 'Yes he is still figuratively alive. But he told me that, whomever I choose, I should give this to them. So take it.'

"Um…okay. But I can't really wear it since I already have an exsphere and I don't really want to get rid of it…" I placed a hand over the blue exsphere on my right hand.

'Don't worry. A Cruxis Crystal, when destroyed, can fuse with an exsphere. Here, I'll do that now.' Feral closed her eyes, an eerie black glow surrounded her and the Cruxis Crystal. After a few seconds the crystal shattered, swirling in a small cyclone before draining into my exsphere.

A strange power merged with the warmness I usually felt from my Exsphere. It wasn't unfriendly…just foreign. A bright light surrounded me, blinding me momentarily. As the light ebbed away I glanced down at my exsphere. Instead of the normal blue it was now a transparent blue. (1)

A burning sensation on my back caused me to wince and look behind me. I gasped. There, in the reflecting wall behind me…was my reflection. The only difference was the pair of translucent wings there. The were blue, like Kratos' wings. The only difference was that they were much lighter, kind of like the ocean on a foggy earlier morning day.

"Wi--Wings!" I said, almost as if I couldn't believe it. Now I had wings, just like Colette, Mithos, Kratos, and Yuan.

'Now I wasn't expecting that to happen…then again, I never tried to do that before. Hmm, I guess they're useful in a way. Now then, the way you get out of here is…'

"Is?" I ask, turning my attention back to Feral. She pointed upwards, towards the glass like roof of the room.

'Now that you have that Cruxis Crystal, you can imagine anything you want here.'

"So all I have to do is imagine my hotel room and I'll be there?"

'Yes.'

"Then how are my wings useful?'

'The image has always appeared on the ceiling for Kloitz whenever he visited this place so I'm assuming it'll do the same for you. Your wings will help you fly up there.'

"I have to fly through the mirror?"

'Yes you do. Now try it.'

I nodded my head and closed my eyes, imagining the wooden floor, the bed, the small desk, the mirror, and Mithos. I opened my eyes and looked up. There in the mirror above me was a swirl of different colors. The quickly took different shapes and there was the hotel room.

'Okay then, you may go now.'

"Ah--yeah…okay…" I spread my wings out, flinching slightly, and rose upwards, surprised by how easy it was to use these wings.

'I'll be speaking to you again shortly.'

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Mithos' POV

I sit on the edge of the bed, staring at the motionless form of Genis. He'd better wake up soon or else I'll have to leave him. I glance warily out the window. About an hour earlier I had seen Lloyd and Zelos, along with a rather upset looking Colette, walking back through the snow. Thankfully they weren't paying any attention to their surroundings. But none the less, I had made sure to place Genis carefully in the bed, making sure to tuck the covers around him to make it look like he had done it himself.

It was about an hour or two to sunrise and I knew that Pronyma was probably suspicious of my whereabouts. I felt remotely sorry for leaving Kratos there to make up an excuse. She probably bugged him to his wits end.

And Kratos mad was not a good thing.

I turn my gaze back to the slumbering boy. His right hand, the one that his Exsphere was mounted on, was sticking out of the covers. I reached my hand out and gently stroked it. I then take it in my hand and run my fingers over the Exsphere. He had told me once that this was the 'life' of an old woman he considered a good friend.

Wait…what was that? Something was…swirling around in his exsphere…come to think of it, was it always this clear before?

Suddenly the sleeping Genis awoke.

"Mithos?" He asked, his voice slightly hoarse as he sat up, looking around the room with sleepy eyes.

"Am I back?"

"Back? You never left…well, you passed out for about an hour but…"

"So I'm in the hotel room? With you?"

"Yes, yes you are." I smile at him, squeezing his hand. Then I remember, I have to leave.

He seems to notice and his eyes widen, he squeezes my hand even harder in response, "You're…leaving soon?"

I nod my head, "Yes, I have to. It's almost sunrise."

"But…"

"I'm still the leader of Cruxis. What if your friends were to come back and see me in here with you? What would they think?"

"That I betrayed them."

"And you have no plans on doing so, do you?"

"N-No..."

"You...are unsure?"

"I…want to be with you. I won't lie about that. But I also know that if I side with you I--my friends…would be hurt."

"Yes they would." I took a deep breath, "That's one reason why I…do not want you to join me." Genis seems surprised, almost shocked at my statement.

"But…that's…not the only reason is it?" he seemed certain of this, and I smiled.

"Yes that's true."

"Then what's the other reason?"

"I…love you." I leaned in, placing another kiss on his forehead before lifting my hand and touching his cheek, to which he nuzzled it affectionately.

"I love you…that's why I do not want you to join me." Even though he was young he seemed to understand what I meant.

I pulled my hand away reluctantly, not wanting to leave him here…alone. He looked at me, his eyes were sad and yet…he seemed to understand now more than he had a few hours ago.

"Mithos…when I see you again--"

"I want you to promise me something." I knew I had cut him off, but I knew at least some of what he was saying. He numbly nodded his head, not daring to ask why I hadn't let him finish.

"When…when I see you again--no--when we see eachother again, we very well may have to fight each other. I…don't want to fight you. But I know that I may wind up having to so I ask this of you."

Genis nodded his head again, asking me silently to continue.

"I want you to fight against me with everything you've got…even if…even if one of us dies."

Genis seemed saddened by this, but oddly enough, his demeanor strengthened. He nodded his head, his eyes showing some fierce pride.

"And I will do that. It might hurt me to fight you even though I…love you…but I will because you asked me to."

I nodded my head and backed up slightly from the bed, drawing out my wings. I then took a step towards the window and opened it. I was about to leave when I felt…something cling to my back. I gasped and glanced over my shoulder.

It was Genis.

He had his face buried in my back, my wings protruding messily on either side.

"Genis…I have to go."

"I know." Came his muffled reply.

I twisted my body around, and soon had him in my arms.

"Genis…what more do you want?"

"…I don't know…I don't want you to die…"

"And I don't want you to die either."

He looked up at me, needless to say the look in his eyes shocked me. He was sad, angry, and worried at the same time. Such a strange mix of emotions on such a young boy.

"Martel…" he whispered. Now I was confused.

"Martel? What about…my sister?"

"Your sister died, you want her back…what if we…brought her back in a different way?"

"I've been doing this for four thousand years--"

"And it's never worked once."

"Genis," I whispered, my tone taking a slight turn to anger, "I do not want to fight with you over this."

"But if I find a better way…if I find a way to bring back her soul to her body…then I…will tell you."

I sighed and shook my head, "This is the best way for me to do it. Now Genis, if you do, meraculously find a better way, then by all means tell me. Some may think I don't care about those who died for this cause, along with the exspheres cause, but I--can't say I care about every single one of them. But like I said before, 'Everything comes with a price'. And yes, I know you hate me for it…for saying that…but it's important that you see how I feel about this. I can't just change my ways."

Genis didn't say a word. He seemed to be thinking it over. In the end he backed up and shook his head, "I…I'm keeping you…too long. You need to get back like you said."

I don't know if I was imagining things, but he sounded a bit withdrawn.

"Genis…"

"You said yourself you needed to leave! So…um…yeah, leave…you have to. Or else you'll get in trouble."

I nodded my head, turning back around flying out the window. Though honestly, I would have loved to say more.

'What if we brought her back a different way?' Those words kept ringing through my head as I flew off into the pre-dawn sky.

"That'd…be nice…Martel, I miss you."

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(1)--the ideas for the color and look of Mithos' wings is brought to you by the pic called 'anotherwingsofGenis' by DraNKa on Deviant Art! Whooh! I'm using one of your pics for an inspiration--I hope you don't mind!

Uh anyway, this is the end of Part Four. As always R&R CC is welcome. Oh yes, I looove reviews. But as of now it doesn't matter to me how many I get but I'd like to have at least two or more. Anyway…the next Part should be focusing mildly on the Tower of Salvation betrayal (though not going into much detail) and of course some things will be altered to fit the story line.