Secrets

Yuki awoke Monday morning to the distant sound of his alarm clock. He groaned and rolled over; why is my alarm on? It's Sunday, isn't it? No wait, It's a bank holiday… Yuki then had a flash back of himself turning on his alarm the previous night. Oh yeah, I guess I need to get out of bed then... Yuki slowly sat up and looked around his room groggily. Once his eyes had focussed he climbed to his feet and blindly pulled on his school uniform. It was the same every morning. Half of the time he didn't know what he was doing. It was routine that enabled him to get ready subconsciously.

Once he had collected his books and placed them roughly into his backpack Yuki slumped downstairs. He could smell Tohru's delicious cooking as he entered the kitchen and took a deep breath, soaking it in. Tohru turned to see him enter and beamed.

"Morning Yuki! I hope you are hungry," she said happily as she tended to the porridge mix. Yuki didn't have the energy to reply; he just walked through the room and collapsed onto the Kotatsu besides Kyo.

"H-Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing?" yelled Kyo as Yuki rested his head on his shoulder. Yuki snapped his head up, his eyes still half shut.

"Shut up you stupid cat or you will wake the whole house up," he spat before resting his head on the table. Kyo was furious, but knew if he said anymore Yuki would really do some damage to him, so just sat silently brooding until Tohru arrived with their breakfast. She smiled at the sight of Yuki sleeping and placed his bowl carefully next to him, cautious not to wake him. She then passed Kyo his bowl and took a seat next to her own.

"Poor Yuki is having trouble waking up again," she whispered to Kyo.

"Ah, who cares?" he said loudly. Yuki stirred and Kyo prepared himself for a hard hit across the head, but Yuki merely glared at him and turned his head away. He then quickly raised his head.

"Miss Honda? Do you know what the date is?" he asked.

"Oh, um… I think its March 15th?" she said uncertainly. Yuki then suddenly jumped to his feet. "I'm sorry Miss. Honda; I have some where I need to be. I'll be back later." He then left the room.

"What's up with him?" Kyo asked, before forcing a large sushi roll into his mouth. Tohru frowned.

"I don't know…" she sighed. "I'm a little worried."

"Ah forget him," said Kyo. "You always worry about everyone else. Try worrying about yourself for a change." Tohru looked down at her plate of food.

"I just hope he's okay…" she said sadly.

Yuki turned one final corner before arriving outside the large iron gates of the cemetery. His body felt heavy as he wandered through the grave yard. The sky was grey and murky; the forecast had said it was going to rain later. Yuki looked the rows of flowerbeds as he walked along the path. The flowers seemed to loose their beauty on a day like today, although Yuki was in no mood to admire nature. He then came to the familiar spot and stopped. The leaves from a near-by tree floated past as Yuki kneeled at the grave. He felt his heart sink. There were no fresh flowers and it hadn't been cleaned. His mother had not come to visit. Yuki then began brushing away the fallen leaves and petals from the marble. He heard a rustling noise and looked up. He couldn't see anything at first, but then noticed some brown hair, drifting in the slight breeze, from behind the near-by tree.

"H-Hello?" Yuki called, slowly climbing to his feet. The figure chanced a look around the tree, and Yuki instantly recognised the large brown eyes.

"Akina? What are you doing here?" the girl slowly walked out from behind the tree, she looked exhausted and somewhat depressed. The dark circles under her eyes did her no favours, and she looked like she had made no effort with her hair hanging down. Her clothes were baggy and her jacket had slipped from her shoulder, although she showed no signs of wanting to correct it.

"Oh Miss. Saito, what happened?" he asked worriedly. She looked like she might collapse at any moment.

"Hm? Oh, nothing, I'm…okay." Her voice sounded ghostly, matching her pale complexion. Yuki watched her for a few seconds and noticed she was swaying slightly.

"Akina…Would you like to sit down? I think you need to rest." He looked around and found a wooden bench near by, surrounded by blooming bushes and trees. He then walked towards her and offered his hand. Akina waited for a moment before placing her hand lightly in his and allowed him to lead her to the seat.

As they sat down, a strong gentle wind stuck up which caused several of the blossoms from the near by tree to float past them. Akina watched them dance in the breeze, a faint smile gracing her lips. "So beautiful…" she whispered. Yuki watched her anxiously.

"Miss. Saito, Are you sure there is nothing wrong?" Yuki knew it was none of his business, but he felt like he owed this girl. It was thanks to his carelessness that her life had been put in danger. He watched her reach out her hand to touch the drifting petals, only for her finger tips to brush the dancing flowers. "You can tell me… I will listen."

Akina held her hand out for a few more moments before making a gentle clutching gesture and bringing it to her chest. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Yuki noticed a small tear run down her cheek, despite her lips still curling into a small smile, it was followed by several more. Yuki leaned forward. With an outstretched hand he gently caressed her cheek, wiping her tears away. Akina turned her head towards him, her eyes still closed; she raised her hand and rested it on his. The tears poured slowly down her cheeks and splashed onto the bench. Yuki brushed her cheek with his thumb. Akina wasn't smiling anymore as the flow of tears steadily increased; she rubbed at her eyes. She felt foolish for crying in front of Yuki, but he merely cupped her face in his hands and smiled sadly at her.

"Akina-san… please tell me." Akina took a deep breath and turned her head away from him. Yuki placed his hands on his lap and waited patiently. There was a long pause before she finally spoke.

"M-my grandmother… She… was sick. And I didn't even know. Neither did Aki." Akina hung her head. "She was the only one in our whole family that cared at all about us. She used to send us weekly packages of food and things. A little note saying how much she missed us and that she hoped Akisame was taking good care of me." A few more tears ran along Akina's nose and fell to her lap.

Yuki felt terrible. "I'm so sorry Miss. Saito… I had no idea…" He took her hand. "It's okay, I know how you feel. It does get better though. Their memory never goes away… but you just have to remember them and all of the good things. Don't be sad because they are gone; be happy because they were here."

Akina sniffed and looked up at Yuki. She saw he too had lost some one. He had that sad, empty look Akina had seen her sister wear ever since that night.

"She helped us escape you know," Akina remembered her sister telling her that night. "It got her shunned by the whole family in the end, but she said she wanted a better life for us, away from the Saito's and their constant feuding." Akisame had sobbed as she told her sister this. From birth she had been treated terribly by her mother, father and older brother. "It's because I wasn't a boy," she said quietly. "Father always wanted two eldest sons." Akina hadn't known any of this. She was only a few years old when her sister had taken her away from that place. Akina was quite sad to think she had never even met her younger sister Fuyu. Akisame had been back to the house a few times. It was usually just to visit grandmother, but she also admitted to going not long after Fuyu was born. "I mean, she's my little sister for God's sake. You can't not let me see her!" But they didn't let her see her. Maybe they were afraid she would try to take Fuyu away too. Akina wouldn't put it past her sister, but either way, Aki came home that night a different girl. It was from then on that she never took Akina back to the house. Even visiting grandmother was banned. "She said she'll come to us." Akisame had been hurt badly. She was only trying to protect Akina; but now Akina wished her sister had only let her visit her grandmother, because it had been five years since she had seen her face to face, and now she was gone.

"Would you like to go for a walk?" Yuki asked. Akina nodded. She was feeling a little better now that Yuki was with her. He got to his feet and helped her up. A small breeze struck up once more as they walked slowly around the cemetery. On such a gloomy day, the place had such a heavy and depressing atmosphere. A small wooden fence lined the path that entwined between the graves. Fallen leaves decorated the path as they strolled silently. Large blooming trees surrounded the area; the grass was a fresh green as it always was in the midst of spring. After five or so minutes, Akina decided to ask the question that was burning inside her.

"Yuki-kun… Why are you here?" A gentle drop of rain fell to the ground as Yuki stopped and blinked at Akina.

"I'm sorry Miss. Saito but I don't think that's any of your business." He replied, getting rather defensive. Akina had not anticipated his reaction.

"Oh… I'm sorry; I didn't mean to upset you. I was just asking… I mean, I told you why I'm here so I just wanted to know…" A few more droplets splashed around them as the rain steadily grew heavier.

"There is no reason for you to know, Akina-san." Yuki seemed to be getting rather annoyed, and in turn, so did Akina.

"There's no need to be so rude about it Yuki I was just asking. Why won't you tell me?" she asked impatiently. The rain was now in a steady flow as it began to soak into Akina's clothes.

"I already said, I don't think that it is any of your business. What difference will it make if you know or not?" Yuki said roughly, his anger building.

"Friends should know these things! But clearly you don't consider me a good enough friend to tell me. Or is it something else? Huh? Is it because I'm a Saito? You know what Yuki, I thought you were better than that," said Akina heatedly.

"You are the one who kept your name a secret! You knew our families were feuding and yet you never thought to mention that?" he asked crossly. The heavens had now opened, rain drenching Yuki's hair and clothes.

"No! I didn't! And you want to know why? It's because I'm better than that. Why should our families petty arguments get in the way of our friendship? You don't even know what they were fighting about, do you?" yelled Akina. It was getting harder to hear each other over the pounding droplets around them.

"That's still no excuse for you to lie to me! It's none of your business why I am here, and that is that."

"What is wrong with you? It's like you never want to share anything with anyone! You never let anyone in! Or is it just that I'm not good enough for you?"

Yuki was shocked by her words, he shivered as the cold wind pierced through her soaked clothes, but he wasn't about to back down. "Don't be so stupid! Don't twist this around and make it about me! I am here for a reason and that reason doesn't concern you, your family or anyone else! You're just a little girl! You wouldn't understand. You have no idea what I have been through in my life and don't you dare try to understand! Yes you are a Saito and I am a Sohma, we aren't meant to be friends so just keep away from me Akina! I don't need you!" Yuki yelled, he then turned and marched back down the pathway. It wasn't long before he disappeared from view completely through the thick layer of rain. He was fuming mad, but he knew some of the things he had said were out of order. As he approached the grave he had been at when he first spotted Akina, Yuki began to feel immensely guilty. Rain ran down the marble memorial, washing away the dead leaves and leaving the train of a small stream back in his previous direction. I didn't mean any of that… he thought, filled with disappointment. And now I have really hurt one of my friends…As the rain dropped from Yuki's fringe onto his cheeks, it masked the sadness in his eyes.

"Dad… what have I done?"

Akina watched Yuki walk away, her fists clenched. The downpour soon completely blocked her view so she turned to face the opposite direction. How stupid is he? All I wanted to know was why he was here and we ended up having an argument… Akina's fists slowly loosened their grip as she thought about the things Yuki had said. "Yes you are a Saito and I am a Sohma, we aren't meant to be friends so just keep away from me Akina! I don't need you!"

Tears began to well in her eyes, although cleverly masked by the water droplets running down her cheeks. She collapsed to her knees. How could he say those things? She thought desperately. He didn't mean that… did he? Akina buried her face in her hands; the rain and winds swirling around her, her whole body shaking in the freezing cold. And there she stayed.