As we pulled into Wal-Mart, Edward began jumping up and down in his seat like a three year old. But considering the fact that he was, technically, 17 and a super strong vampire, the truck was rocking back and forth, people were already beginning to stare and we hadn't even made in into the actual story yet! I got out, and Alice yanked him out of the truck, I locked up and walked over to grab a cart.
Before I could get one, there was one in front of me, and Edward was sitting in it. "Hello Bella, what a lovely day we are having!" He said. I looked up in the sky, it looked like it was about to pour down rain. Lovely, my foot.
"Edward, get out of the cart, you're too big to ride in it." I sounded very much like a mom scolding her toddler.
"NO! I said I wanna ride in it, and I wanna ride in it!" I shook my head and looked at Alice.
"Just let him ride in it Bella, what are they gonna do about it?"
"Fine, but you're pushing him." I knew I couldn't do it even if I wanted to. We attracted lots of weird looks as we went in and Edward took it upon himself to wave at everyone, once we were in he went over to the greeter man and wanted a sticker. When the man reached to peel one off the sheets, Edward grabbed the whole roll and ran screaming off down the aisle, the sticker roll waving wildly behind him. I sighed and began to go after him, but I was taking my sweet time. Alice, having never been in a Wal-Mart before, was not much more help than Edward.
"So Bella, you're telling me that they have groceries and a café? Why would you need both?"
"Why do you care Alice? It's not like you can eat anyway."
"You humans are so spoiled! You can't even go home and fix your own hotdogs, you have to go to a store that sells them and buy one already cooked! It's ridiculous!"
"Alice, shut up and help me find your brother." But she was already gone; I glanced down the floor and noticed a trail of smiley stickers leading back to the toy area. I hoped I could get there before Edward hurt someone.
I finally reached the toy aisles and walked up and down each one looking for Edward. Suddenly something flew by me. After several repeated attempts at grabbing it. It slid down the aisle, finally coming to a stop. It was Edward sitting on a bike, but not just any bike, a pink Barbie bike that was three times too little for him.
"Bella! Look at this bike! Isn't it pretty! You can ride too, if you want. There's pegs!" I went over to him and tried to drag him off the bike, yanking his hair, which had him screaming bloody murder, when the worst possible thing imaginable happened.
"Edward? Bella?" I spun around, already recognizing the voice. It was Carlisle. He was with Esme and Emmett. Edward squealed and ran over to Carlisle, wrapping him in a bone breaking hug. Esme looked at Emmett.
"How's the stock market doing?"
Emmett shrugged, sheepishly."So far, so good."
Carlisle grabbed Edward's arm and began to lead him to the front door.
"I think it's time we got you home, Edward."
Edward looked up at him with big eyes. "Are the Martians back?"
"What, oh, err, yes? The Martians are back." Carlisle raised an eyebrow at me. Edward nodded in understanding. He smoothed his shirt, and his hair, giving me a dirty look.
Just as we were walking back to my truck, Alice came rushing out.
"Bella! Did you know they had CD's there too?" She was rushing out, with two boys in the standard blue apron uniform behind her hauling two carts each.
"Alice! We were only in there for 15 minutes! Did you have to buy the whole store?"
"Shush up, I got you a present!" She threw a stuffed dog at me. Why would I want a stuffed dog? "I figured you could name it Jacob Jr." She laughed at her own joke. I was glad Edward was drunk; because I'm sure she would have got in trouble for that one otherwise.
"Oh ya, Edward. This one's for you." She gestured to the last cart, which was holding…
"My Barbie bike!" He giggled again, I wondered if I would ever hear Edward giggle again after this. I could only hope not.
Carlisle, having enough, loaded a squirming Edward into his Mercedes, and he and Esme drove off, leaving Alice, Emmett, and I to load all the bags.
"We're going to get it when we get home, aren't we?" I asked they both shook their heads, I decided to load the bags as slowly as possible, and they followed my lead. We weren't too eager to experience the wrath of Carlisle.