Disclaimer: IT'S NOT MINE.

-cries in a corner-

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Take me in, take me home

I can't stand to be alone. -"Lonely No More", Clay Aiken

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Shatter CH 8. Shuichi POV.

I'm too busy singing, crying, carrying myself away to a place where thunderstorms do not exist, that I don't notice the footsteps walking into my room.

Hiro won't mind, though, and I'm not that hungry anyway.

I just keep singing, singing. Float away, sadness, anger, hurt. Flutter off to the sound of these notes, little butterflies, and please, please don't come back.

Here, in this highly uncomfortable bed in this dark room, singing, without a care in the world, this is where I need to stay.

It's safe here.

A cigarette is lit. Oh, Hiro, I thought you knew, you really shouldn't smoke in hospital rooms. You know, if a doctor or someone catches you–

But that wasn't your lighter, was it, Hiro?

In fact, it sounded suspiciously like...

I turn my head to face the blonde head that does most definitely not belong to Hiro.

...Yuki's.

-

The rain has slowed down, I notice. I don't think it's raining much at all, anymore. I hear a few stray drip-drops here and there, like you do when someone forgets to twist the faucet all the way off. It's like that.

The tiny droplets of rain hitting the window, slowly but surely, are all I can hear. I've stopped singing, stopped crying, maybe I've stopped breathing too.

I don't know.

Yuki's here. Yuki.

I wasn't supposed to see him, ever again! I can't...he can't...I don't want him to know.

I don't want Yuki...to be broken again.

What, oh what, please God tell me, am I supposed to do?

"How many stitches?" he asks flatly.

Well, that's one way to start a conversation with the person who's single-handedly destroyed your life.

No. Don't talk to him. I will not talk to him. I don't want to.

Who am I kidding, of course I want to.

But I won't.

"Eleven," I say, almost as flatly.

...Crap.

He chuckles.

Why is he chuckling?

Last I checked, getting eleven stitches in your hand was definitely not funny.

I think I'm pouting.

"I've got you beat," he says.

Huh? I tilt my head at him. Sometimes, Yuki, I really don't get you.

He holds out his hand to me, and points with his other hand to a small scar that I've somehow never, ever seen before. Could I really have overlooked it? It can't be new, can it?

No, it looks healed, already.

Cautiously as I've ever done anything, I gently run my finger on top of the scar, feeling the bumps, the imperfection, the broken skin sewn together as well as it could have been, but in the end, not well enough.

I'm scared that by touching it, I'll break it open again. I'm terrified. I pull my hand away, as quickly as I can, praying that this is all a dream, that Yuki is not here, and I never touched it at all.

That scar is Yuki's. His.

Nothing that's Yuki's is mine, anymore.

I try to forget how wonderful it was, the feel of his skin, so tough, but silky smooth. I can't think about that. I can't have that.

Yuki is no longer yours, Shuichi.

Get it through your thick, pink head.

I scoot as close to the edge of the bed as I can, without falling off. The edge farthest away from Yuki. I can't even risk touching him. I'll break him. I know it.

A flash of pain in Yuki's eyes. His beautiful, gorgeous, infinitely sexy golden eyes, filled with pain, if only for a second.

Look what you've done, Shuichi.

I turn away from him. I can't look at him, can't stare into the face of the person I've destroyed.

I just can't.

The rain is still falling. Harder and harder, it's falling now. I think it may storm again.

Oh, please, raindrops, wash it all away. Everything. I don't want to hurt anymore.

But more than anything, please, I don't want Yuki to hurt.

I shut my eyes tight, chewing on my bottom lip. If I just wish hard enough, the rain will wash everything away, and one by one, everything will start to make sense again.

Right?

Arms. Around me. Yuki's arms. Aren't they?

No, Yuki, don't touch me, please. You can't, I'm...I don't belong to you anymore. I don't belong to me, either. I kind of get the feeling I don't belong to anyone. I'm just a ghost, floating around, wandering, waiting for someone to accidentally leave their door open so I can float in and pretend I'm home.

Home. I want to go home.

With Yuki.

No. No. Yuki's not mine anymore, he's not. I betrayed him, I screwed everything up, I destroyed his life, and mine too. I'm just a ghost, with nowhere to go.

I try to push him away. I do. But he wraps his arms around me, tighter, clinging to me, suffocating me. Wanting me.

I choke back a sob, staring for directly out the window, searching for light, answers, but finding nothing but dark, gray storm clouds. I try to remember how to breathe.

Make it all make sense again, please.

I can't help it. I cry.

Take me home.

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A/N: Oooh, they're getting sadder. Forgive me. Funnier chapters coming up real soon. Really!

More reviews? You guys really are too kind. I love you!

Bad Luck Jynx: Eeee, thanks so much! You're so kind. ...Did my story make you sad? I'm sorry. I was pretty sad when I wrote these past few chapters but...this story has a mostly happy ending. :D I LOVE your username, by the way.

I think it is a well-known fact, by now, that everyone on this site has a cooler username than me.

Oh well, what can you do.

RENA. YAAAY I HAVE A NICKNAME! Thanks so much. MORE STRAWBERRY POCKY FOR YOU! And anymore yummy flavors you like. Love you too. X3

Silvea: Wowie, thanks so much! I've never actually read Lord Of the Flies but...since it's a professional, published book, I'm very very honored. -jots it down on 'Books to Read' list- Thanks again, dude! XD

Murmury-chan! And the nickname returns. Umm, I'm the one who posted two chapters in three days, my dear. I think I'm the one with too much time on the comp. And I think we all wish we had a vase to smash, ne? Every once in a while at least. Thank you so much as always!! Love.

Sayuriiii: Wah. You really are too nice. You figured it out...is my writing too predictable? -laughs- Actually, I'm really happy that you're reading it the way I'm writing it. You're making me feel as though I've accomplished exactly what I wanted to accomplish with this fic and for this...I MUST GLOMP YOU! -glomps- Super love!

Yukiiii: Someone else who is way too kind. -bricked- YAY CHATROOM! -falls over- I love your reviews, you are awesome too, no da! Hee, the faces at the end of your review look like they're dancing. Glomps to you too!

Xedra: WOWIE. That's the kind of review I've always dreamed about! Thank you so so much...I've always wanted to be called poetic. I'm terrible, however, at poetry, so there go all my dreams of that. So that really means a lot to me, thank you! Gosh, I hate Tohma. He is super-evil in this fic...as will be revealed...uhhh, in a few chapters. -laughs- That's a pretty song, you were listening to, and sad too. I love sad songs! ...Okay, I'm rambling now. Thanks SO much again. :D

Everyone else! Thanks so much for reading, and I'd love it if you reviewed. ;D Thanks again!