Disclaimer: I am actually running out of clever ideas for disclaimers. Obviously, I'm not talented enough to own Gravitation.
Shatter CH 11. Eiri POV.
Someone (I cannot, at the time, remember who) once told me that someday, I would be severely punished for the large amount of drinking I do.
That day has finally come.
It starts innocently enough. I stumble, damp and miserable, into the small, badly-decorated, relatively-crowded bar. The heavenly smells of smoke and alcohol penetrate my lungs, gently guiding me toward a state of temporary bliss.
I then take the last empty barstool, inwardly yelling at the bartender to stop chatting with the drunken regulars and get his scrawny butt over here.
Now would be nice.
Okay. Ten seconds and I'm out of here. Tapping my foot somewhat impatiently, I turn to face the clock, and for not even a nanosecond, meet the big, obnoxiously shiny blue eyes of a man I know, and wish I'd never met.
That's right. I am seated next to the one and only Sakuma Ryuichi, and his pink cloth...rabbit, I think it is.
Well, isn't this the whipped cream on top of a perfect day.
Fuck.
I crank the gears in my head, planning my escape. I'll tell him I need to pee, then–
Crap. He recognizes me.
And subsequently begins yammering in my ear, like we're friends, or something.
Suddenly, I am overcome with a burning desire to fling myself off a brigde.
Instead, I wave over the inept bartender, and request a large glass of the hardest liquor he's got.
Some ear plugs as well, but he just looks funny.
Obviously, he's never tried conversing with Sakuma Ryuichi.
That lucky, lucky man.
"I couldn't believe it!" Sakuma is saying, after thirty minutes of incessant babbling, much more loudly than necessary. "The maid stole my favorite pair of underwear! She stole them, and apparently, she kept them under her pillow too, as some sort of good luck charm or something! Now that's just gross, don't you think?"
Yes. Now please shut up.
"Kumagoro thinks so too," he rambles on, moving the rabbit's head up and down in some lame imitation of a nod. "So you know what Tohma did? He got her fired! Got her good, na no da! Shazam!"
Tohma. I try not to look like I'm cringing. Absently, I wipe my lips with the back of my hand. I then wipe the back of my hand on my pant leg.
I need something to wipe my pant leg on.
No, I need a smoke.
"You got any cigarettes?" I ask. Oh, I'm slurring already.
"No siree!" He says cheerfully. No, dammit, Sakuma, this is not a cheerful subject!
"Cigarettes are very, very bad for you, Yuki-san!" He lowers his voice to a whisper. A loud whisper. "Do you know what cigarettes do to you, na no da?"
"Of course I do, idiot."
He's choking. No, the rabbit is choking. Sakuma is making utterly repulsive hacking sounds, and his moronic plush toy is clutching its neck, dramatically suffocating itself. He then drops the rabbit onto the floor.
"Oh, Kumagoro," he sighs, looking down sorrowfully at the lump of fabric on the ground. "I told you cigarettes were bad."
Suddenly, I wish that I always carried around a big, shiny gun, just like Shuichi's psycho manager.
Come to think of it, he managed Sakuma too, didn't he?
How great the temptation must've been, having to spend every waking minute with this lunatic, and having that gun, right there in his pocket, just begging to be shot.
I'm not sure if I really pity him, or really admire him.
Sakuma bends over to pick up the toy, and dusts it off gingerly, giggling to himself. I find it very, very difficult to believe that this man is about ten years older than me.
Hell, I can't believe he graduated kindergarten.
He fishes a cherry out of his fruity little cocktail, then plucks the fruit off its stem and pops it into his mouth. Humming to himself, he twirls the stem around his finger.
I focus my attention on the pool of moisture forming around the bottom of my glass, slowly seeping through the napkin it's place upon.
Fascinating, really.
"Oh, hey, Yuki-san!" Sakuma exclaims, a few decimals short of louder than humanly possible. "I have something to tell you, something important!"
I nod slightly, bracing myself for an epic tale of starfish and green tea.
"Okay!" He begins, clapping his hands like he's proud of himself for forming these two syllables. "This is a big, ginormous secret, but I simply must tell you before I explode."
No. Please, explode.
"About Tohma...he has a really super-big crush on you."
The rabbit's nodding again.
Now I really wish I had that gun.
Anyone wanna shoot me?
Anyone at all?
"And he made up this plan, you see," he ties the cherry stem in a knot around his finger, "to hire this girl to pretend to be a producer, then she'd kiss Shu-chan and make him feel really bad about himself so he'd break up with you!"
That's lovely, Sakuma.
Wait.
WHAT?
"Kumagoro actually thought that was a pretty cool plan, which I guess it would be, if it didn't hurt Shu-chan. So I thought I'd tell you now, Yuki-san, before it's too late, and Shu-chan gets hurt!"
It is too late, you imbecile.
And, so help me God, I am going to kill Seguchi Tohma.
Or at least key his car.
Seguchi, you see is very proud of his car.
How could he even think of hurting my...
Of hurting Shuichi?
That bitch.
"Where are you going, na no da?" Sakuma asks as I stand up from my stool. It takes me a second to find my balance.
So maybe I drank a bit too much.
Oh well, never hurt anyone.
I don't answer.
"Can Ryu-chan come too?" He jumps out of his stool, bunny in hand.
"No."
"Oh, please, Yuki-san? Kumagoro loves car rides!" He's bouncing on his toes, and swaying himself back and forth. I think he's drunk too.
Never mind, the idiot's always like this.
"We can fit in the trunk!"
"Fine."
He did, after all, just help me realize that...
Oh my God.
I love Shuichi.
I love Shuichi, dammit, and if anyone, namely Seguchi Tohma, tries getting in the way of that...
Then they are one sorry motherfucker, na no da.
-
A/N: Well, it looks like we've finally reached some sort of climax. About time, huh? -laughs- I love this chapter...it was just insanely fun to write. If you ever want a POV challenge, Drunken Eiri is the way to go. It's a blast. Ryu and Eiri are my two favorites, and I really wanted them to have a chapter together, what with the super personality clash and all...I thought it would be fun. And it was. :D
That being said, my very deepest apologies if anyone was offended by anything in this chapter. That's the last thing I want, so I'm very sorry if I did! Should I bump up the rating of the story, I wonder?
Anyways, this is indeed the penultimate chapter...that means the last one's coming up next. Exams are next week, though, so I may not have it up on Friday, as per usual. Again, my apologies.
sayuri: Totally agree. I love Hiro. I think I have a few friends as loving and loyal as him, which I am truly grateful for...but none as sexy. -hit with a brick- Thanks for your review as always! Love you!
DarkMetalAngel: -laughs- Yeah, she does suck a little bit...but she's not all bad, as we now know. It's all that blonde pimp, Tohma! -falls over laughing-
Rena: Gosh, I am loving all this hostility toward Higuchi-san! Mwee hee, I like cliffhangers. I think everyone knows that by now, though. :D YES I LOVED YOUR FANFIC! SasuNaru is absolutely wonderful. Somehow, though, I can't bring myself to write it. Hmmm. LOVE YOU TOOOO!
Xedra: Awesome angst...really? Thank you! I personally think that I'm just awesomely angsty. XD "Oh crap, that horrible woman is back." That seriously made me laugh out loud! Love it! Oooh, I made your heart pound? Have I ever mentioned that I love your reviews? Yeah, I did. Oh well! I'm saying it again! LOVE!
engmbt: Eeee, thanks so much! That review made my day. :D I do agree that it's a bit overdramatic, but...that's actually what I was going for! Is that weird? -laughs-
Yuki: Well then, my dear, you are a geek of the very best kind. XDYes, I still love that phrase. I said it in an everyday conversation a few days ago. Eeehh? You don't remember the evil catlady from chapter two? Well, that was a long time ago, so I understand. Or maybe I'm just stupid and I read the review wrong. Oh well. Thanks so much, I love you too!
Stormpaw: Printed...it...out? Wow, so, I feel hugely special right now. -basks in glorious moment- Cheese? That is a little weird. I'll have to try it sometime! Ramen is my dear love. Oh, and I don't mind hearing about your eating habits! I'm rambling about mine too, after all. Thanks so much for your lovely longest review ever! I feel special again! -laughs- Love you too!
Thanks to everyone who reads this doofy little fic, and HUGE thanks to everyone who reviewed Brilliance, and Pretend...which, thanks to the lovely Yuki-Mizu, is going to be my new multi-chapter project, once I finish typing this one up. So if you like RyuShu, check it out if you have the time!
Have a wonderful day everyone! Thanks again!