You won't cry for my absence, I know -
You forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant...?
Am I so insignificant...?
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?
I woke up stiffly, my eyes remaining close to save effort. I could've sworn I died too, I rather I did. I didn't like being in pain. After a time I finally opened my eyes to find myself in the hospital. I looked left, unable to move my head from the large amount of bandages wrapped around it. A packet full of dark blood was attached to me through my arm. I felt sickened by it, knowing it was someone else's blood pumping into me.
I sighed slightly, my eyes flickering in the direction of the door. I noticed two shadows outside on the wall. One was pacing. I smiled slightly, knowing it was Roy. At least I know he's waiting for me. Maybe he does care...
That was all I was thinking about when I fell back into a deep sleep.
-
The next time I woke up, I was in a different room. More machines were hooked up to me, small monitors beating with my heart. I cringed, staring at it. Then I started to hear voices. I blinked, trying to look around me, but the room was dark, the only window sprinkled with stars.
It turned out there were other people in the room, muttering to each other. I couldn't catch what they were saying, but one of them sounded like Roy. My heart fluttered at the thought that he was still here with me.
The person I kenw was Roy sighed, walking over to my bed and sat down, staring at me. If I could, I would stare back, but now my eyes were closed. I was feeling tired again. The other person, who I now took as my doctor went over to the machines and started slowly switching them off.
Slowly I started realizing what was happening. Those machines were keeping me alive, and they were being turned off. So I was going to die.
"I'm sorry Riza..." Roy murmered, leaning over where I lay. The air seemed to fill with the scent of his cologne, making me dizzy. I felt him gently kiss my forehead and push a strand of hair out of my face. Then he sat back down and held my hand as I slipped away again.
-
I stirred again shortly, feeling a dull burning in my chest. I opened my eyes and looked almost frantically for him. He was still by my side, holding my numb hand with a sad look in his eyes as he watched me. I stared back, tears filling my eyes. "R...Roy..."
He blinks, surprised I was able to speak. "Riza...I really am sorry I couldn't save you..."
I gazed at him longingly, unable to speak any longer. I nod slightly, closing my eyes and letting go. Then, I died.
-
Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?
-
They held my funeral a few days later. How do I know? Because I was there. Somehow my soul lingered on when I was seperated from my body. Probably because I still have unfinished buisness in Central. I still have to protect im and see if he truly did love me.
It seemed like he didn't though. After the funeral, life at the office seemed ordinary. It was like no one even cared that I was dead or not. I was replaced quickly. Occasionaly I would be the subject of convosation, but otherwise, nothing.
Roy seemed unfazed by my death, acting as he normaly did. That crushed the heart I no longer have present.
I watch him alot more now, knowing he couldn't see my staring at him or hear me trying to talk to him. But I've been starting to think he can still feel my prescence. It's strange, but anything I do to actually affect the world would happen.
Today I started to experiment with that, the exact week after my funeral. It started out with small things, stealing a pen or a file someone needed and watching their reactions before silently placing it back. Then it got more significant, and into bigger things until finally, while Second Luitenant Havoc was walking past, I was able to push him. He fell back with a cry of shock, slipping down into a staircase.
I watched him fall, a small smirk on my face. I liked that I was at least able to do this. I could use it as revenge.
-
Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
I know what you do to yourself,
I breathe deep and cry out,
"Isn't something missing?"
"Isn't someone missing me?"
---
x.x Wow, that took longer to write then expected. -nods slowly-
Please review!
© Copyright 2007 Ayumi Elric (FanFiction ID 1136837 ). All rights reserved. The series Full Metal Alchemist(Hagane No Renkinjutsushi) belongs fully to Himoru Arakawa; usage of her series and character is entirely borrowed. All rights reserved for plot, not to be stolen, copied or reproduced without the permission of Ayumi Elric.