Dear Diary
It's been a while hasn't it?
Many apologies. Was forced to vacate the lair quite abruptly due to wandering fop and nosy police-type friends.
Went to Scotland for a few months, played golf.
Fop terrible at golf.
Missed INCREDIBLY easy short putt because of "the terrible uproar the butterflies were making in the next meadow".
Ridiculous.
Do NOT understand why Christine prefers that to me.
I have a manly cape; he has a foppish hair cut.
I have an adorable attack dog, he has a carrot.
Am confused.
Erik
Dear Diary
Made cupcakes
Christine came down to visit.
Was seemingly excited to see me.
THREW herself at me and cupcake tins.
Said Fop tried to make cupcakes for her while I was gone.
Apparently failed miserably.
Yay
Erik
Dear Diary
Fop has gone TO FAR.
Was cleaning up and unfortunate cupcake mishap in the kitchen this morning and what did I find?
Carrot bits EVERYWHERE.
Is hereafter banned from lair.
Unless it is by my invitation, and only then if it is for his eminent demise.
God as my witness, I will tolerate it no longer.
Erik
Dear Diary
Have procured materials necessary for revenge.
Warned my shrink that he may have a new client soon, prepared him a bit.
Am hoping to get discount for recommending his services.
Hope for the best!
Erik
Cape update- Manly and perfect. Slightly cupcake scented. Go me!
A/N
Oh man guys. Soooooo sorry its been so long. Ive been reallllly busy. But yeah. Oh, sorry that this chapter is absolute crap too. Ill write more/better when finals are over. Yay school ending!
Ohhh yeah, if anyone can catch the P. G. Wodehouse refrence I'll gove you a cupcake. Just leave the quote/a norte thing ina review. Ill make ya one!
Peace out.
A