Title: One Hand Clapping
Author: Stormy1x2 (travelingstorm)
Words (fic portion) for chapter 6: 6022 (approx 18 OpenOffice pages)
Rating: PG13 for language
Pairing: Mention of April/Casey, Casey's mom/dad
Summary: Book 1. Casey learns not all battles can be won with a hockey stick, and April, and the TMNT learn there's more to their so-called 'simple' friend then they ever dreamed.
Notes: Once again beta'd by the wonderful Red Rebel. Slight warning of graphic descriptions near the end.
o0o...o0o
96969696969696969696969696969696969696969696
o0o...o0o
Loud, wet-sounding coughs were what woke him up. Casey opened bleary eyes and listened to his mother hack and wheeze in her room down the hall. They were not an unfamiliar sound-his mother had been a heavy smoker for a good part of her life, despite her otherwise healthy tendencies, and so he didn't immediately panic when one final loud burst from her ended in abrupt silence. A minute later, he heard faint muttering, and the sounds of her over-stuffed pink slippers scuffling down the hallway towards the bathroom.
Casey yawned, stretched and let a hand down to scratch his stomach idly before casting his gaze to the small, battered alarm clock that told him the time was seven twenty-something. The something part came from the fact that the final number on the display screen no longer registered, a direct result from Raphael throwing it at Mikey's head and actually connecting with it, one too many times.
Lots of time. With a faint groan, Casey pushed himself up and rolled over, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. His mother's appointment had been set for ten thirty this time, meaning they had to be on the road in an hour if they wanted to make it on time. Most people probably wouldn't consider an hour enough time to prepare, but he was a graduate of the 'stick-head-under-sink-and-shake-like-dog' school of haircare. Granted, he then used a towel and then a brush to smooth it out, but the whole procedure took less then ten minutes to do.
His mother had similar methods. She preferred to shower at night, which meant mornings required about ten minutes to wash her hair at the large sink in the basement and brush it back, letting it dry naturally.
Hell, we're gonna be early, he groused. It was very tempting to consider flopping back over for another half hour snooze, but then his mother started hacking again, and he winced, opting to give in and stand up instead.
Eying the pile of clothes in the corner, half in and half out of his bag, he picked up two pairs of jeans and checked them, throwing the cleanest looking pair on and tossing the leftover to the other side of the room he'd mentally designated as the 'laundry basket'. He did the same thing for his stack of t-shirts and tank tops, sniffing the armpits to find the one shirt that wouldn't drive away everyone in a two-foot radius, and pulling it over his head before heading downstairs.
He passed his mother in the hallway who waved wearily at him as she disappeared back in her room. She was pale again, the dark shadows under her eyes looking like someone had cold-cocked her, giving her a matching set of eight-balls. One hand was clutching her robe to her chest, the other was trailing along the walls like she was relying on it to provide her with some measure of stability. Only the deadly look she shot at him as he passed her prevented him from offering to help her back to her room.
They needed to talk. And damned soon. But not now.
Coffee. Nectar of the gods, giver of life and keeper of sanity. Yessss...Casey loaded up the pot, dumping enough in for two cups and turned it on. A scrounge through the cupboards revealed a couple of boxes of fruit-and-grain protein bars which he decided would make an adequate breakfast. Carrying his bounty over to the table, he sat down heavily, unwrapping one of the bars and eating it in an effort to keep himself from falling asleep.
It had not been a pleasant night. Again.
The nausea seemed to hit his mother hardest at night, and he had woken up at three in he morning to the sound of her giving offerings to the porcelain god. It had been bad enough that she hadn't been able to close the door after her, and he had slipped inside. His mother hated for him to see her in any moment of weakness, but she had been too far gone to put up much of a fight, and so he'd held her hair back for her. It wasn't much, but at least it was something he could do, since his story-telling didn't seem to provide much of a distraction, and she was still refusing to take any more pills.
They had talked for a long time that night, before his mother had finally given in and had gone to bed, leaving Casey free to call April and get her take on the whole thing. He hadn't expected to be grilled by the guys so quickly.
It had taken a lot of fast words and back-pedaling to get Mikey to back down out of an immediate road trip. The hyper turtle was always in the mood for an adventure-particularly when said adventure took them to the farmhouse where they could be outside without being undercover-and had been all for heading upstate the following morning.
Casey wasn't ready for that yet. If the guys showed up, they'd know instantly something was wrong, and most likely, his mother wouldn't be able to hide it. Or she wouldn't hide it-it wasn't like she couldn't handle the group of them, after all. Which was the main problem, really.
His mother would probably eventually take to the guys like a duck to water, and that meant she'd consider them to be more people to hide any sign of weakness from. It was bad enough trying to get her to talk to him when it was just the two of them camping out at grandmas place-he had a pretty good idea her mouth would seal up tighter then Fort Knox around company.
Mikey had been disappointed, but he'd also been easily mollified when Casey promised to broach the idea of a visit to his mother. Raphael had been suspicious, but then, he always was, and Casey dismissed him. Ditto Leo-it was no surprise Leo had been demanding answers and information the second he found out Casey was on the line.
That had been two days ago. Casey didn't know long he could stall the idea to Mike or the rest of them-Leo seemed to be determined to meet his mother now that she knew about them. He had listened to Raphael snicker about Leo's rants on how they had to verify that she wasn't a threat and that she really, really understood the need for secrecy-never mind the fact that technically she'd known for a year already and had yet to call the papers to tell them about giant rats and turtles wandering around her property.
His mother walked in, one hand pressed against her stomach. Casey noted the faint green look to her face and decided not to inquire about breakfast for her. Instead, he gave her a weak-though hopefully encouraging-smile as she poured herself a glass of water and muttered something about being on the road in twenty minutes.
The ride up was pretty quiet. His mother nodded off about fifteen minutes in, and didn't wake up until Casey pulled into the hospital parking lot. Her eyes flickered open as he followed the signs-for some reason, he still didn't understand the twists and turns of the labyrinth deceptively labeled the hospital parking lot without guidance-and a quick glance at her out of the corner of his eye, caught a resigned and weary look crossing over her face before smoothly disappearing behind a calm mask of indifference.
"It's that time again," she said dryly as he parked his Chevy. Casey turned off the ignition and nodded. She opened her door, hesitated, and turned to look at him. "You don't have to come in with me."
Casey rolled his eyes and shot her a mild glare. "Yeah, I do. Gotta make sure you actually go inside, and not run out the back door or something."
"Mouthy brat."
"I come by it honestly," he pointed out, and there was nothing she could say to that. She snorted instead, and got out of the car. "Besides, Sid's supposed to meet us here today."
"I know." She led the way into the building, striding confidently down the hallway, nodding at the nurses and doctors she passed like a General inspecting the troops. Casey followed behind, content to let her dictate the pace and mood she seemed determined to set.
Punching the elevator button, Casey noticed his mother giving him an appraising look.
"I got somethin' on my face or what?" he asked her warily. The last time she'd had that look, he'd discovered no, he was NOT too old for the lick-the-thumb-and-wipe technique all mothers valued, as though a mother's saliva held magical antibacterial properties.
She shook her head, a small grin on her face. "Nah, nothing. Well, something." She cocked her head to the side. "I never thought you'd forgive Sid so easily."
"Since when do I hold grudges, Ma?"
"You don't. Except for certain cases. I figured Sid might almost be one of those 'unforgivable ones'."
The elevator arrived and they moved aside, allowing for a pair of orderlies to move an empty gurney past them before stepping inside. Adelina hit the number for the Oncology floor.
Casey shrugged, thinking about it. "Sid's family. And he wasn't a Dragon-not to start, anyway."
Adelina nodded at him but didn't say anything-just continued that flat stare that gave him the urge to confess anything he'd ever done or thought about doing in his entire life. He tried again. "I mean, he says that anyway. I dunno if it's true, but I think it is. Feels like it is, you know?" He sighed, and leaned back against the elevator wall. "Part of me is still pissed off at him, but I want to forgive him too. Stupid, huh?"
His mother smiled at him. "Actually, I think that's rather...mature." She winked as the doors slid open, and she walked out, leaving Casey in mild shock. Then he shook himself and followed her, muttering to himself. "Ain't mature -don't want to be, ain't gonna be."
It didn't stop her from smiling. He fumed.
When they stepped into the Oncology lounge, Casey's eyes zeroed in on the lean figure of his cousin sprawled out in the plastic chair. He had a baseball cap draped sideways over his head, arms flung out over the neighboring chairs, legs stretched out into the hallway as though trying his best to impede all the foot traffic the hallway provided. Casey snorted in amusement.
Adelina did one better and strode forward until she towered over the snoozing figure. Then she smirked, reared back and delivered a sharp kick into Sid's calf muscle. Sid came awake with a howl.
"God DAMN it you little fu--" His eyes finally registered who was there, and his mouth abruptly slammed shut, eyes wide. "Shit!"
"Nice to see you too, boy," Adelina drawled, folding her arms and eying her nephew with amusement. "Nice mouth, by the way."
Sid's face flushed. "Yeah, well, I didn't know it was you, Aunt Addie," he grumbled, looking away. Then his head swung back around and he glared at her, "That fuc—er, freakin' hurt!"
"It was supposed to. Maybe next time you'll keep your legs out of the hallways. Innocent people walk by here you know." Reaching down, she smacked his head lightly, and then ruffled his hair. Sid rolled his eyes.
Casey burst out laughing. "Sid, you look about sixteen years old right now. Ma, if you'd pinch his cheeks, it'd be the perfect finishing touch!"
Adelina looked as though she might consider it. Sid scowled and backed away, holding his hands in front of his face defensively. "Shit! Man, do not give your mother ideas!"
"Adelina?" A familiar voice called out to them. "And of course, Casey!"
Bianca strolled down the hall, arms full of folders and miscellaneous papers. Casey's mother couldn't hide the smirk as the brightly smiling nurse hurried over to greet them. Adelina received a polite and friendly "Hello!" while Casey was treated to a one-thousand watt smile.
"I can walk you down to the therapy room if you like, Ms Jones," she offered graciously. "Unless I can do something for you, gentlemen?" She smiled at Casey again, but then directed a similar one at Sid, who grinned right back at her.
"I think we're good, Miss..." he trailed off expectantly.
She dimpled prettily at him. "Please, call me Bianca."
"Sid. I'm Casey's cousin." He winked and stuck out his hand for her to shake. Adelina rolled her eyes and then lightly touched the young woman on the arm as hint to get going. A final wave, and then they disappeared around the corner, Bianca sending them one last heated look before she was gone. Casey shot a look at his cousin.
"You might come in handy," he commented. "You can take her off my hands."
Sid grinned wolfishly. "Gee, now there's a burden," he drawled. "Pretty little thing, and sweet too. You sure you don't mind?"
Casey glared. "Um, hello? April? I don't need another sweet, pretty thing-I've already got one." He registered what he'd just said and amended it slightly. He didn't even want to think about what April would do to him if he called her a 'thing'. "Sweet, pretty woman, that is. Cafeteria?" He jerked his head in the direction of the stairs. For some reason, he was feeling the urge to walk instead of taking the elevator again.
Sid shrugged, nodding. "Sure."
It was too early for sandwiches and salads, but the pancakes on the breakfast menu looked pretty good and smelled even better. And it's cheaper then MacD's, Casey thought with satisfaction. He looked over to see Sid making a face at the runny eggs, opting for a double order of toast instead, and grabbing a couple handfuls of jelly packets.
Finding a free table, Casey claimed it for them and sat down, pouring syrup over his pancakes and digging right in. In contrast, Sid took his time and did his best to drown his toast into submission using almost six full packets of strawberry jam. Casey raised an eyebrow. "Want some toast with your jelly?"
Sid grinned. "Oh come on, I've done worse than this."
Casey blinked-and then nodded. "True," he agreed. He shrugged. "But it's been a while."
Sid nodded, eyes on his toast floating in a lake of jelly. An odd smile passed over his face. "What time is it?"
Casey glanced at his watch. "'Bout ten-forty. Why?"
Sid looked up at him almost searchingly, and then the small smile disappeared as he didn't seem to find what he was looking for. "Nothing." He brandished his fork and used it in place of a knife, pressing down on a corner of his toast to sever it. "Cheers, cuz."
Casey saluted him with a piece of pancake and they ate in relative silence. It wasn't the relaxed kind of quiet that had come over them the day before, but a charged one. Obviously Sid had been expecting Casey to pick up on some kind of hidden signal, but Casey was clueless as to what it was. There was nothing odd about the time that he could think--
Oh.
Casey snickered. Sid looked at him with confusion. "Case?"
The ex-vigilante waved his hand over their food, and gave him a knowing look. "It's almost time for 'elevenses'."
Sid's eyes lit up, and then he doubled over laughing, catching himself just before his hair fell into his jelly-lake. "I didn't think you'd remember!"
Casey grinned as memories of summer mornings with their grandmother flooded over him. Casey had always wanted pancakes, but Sid preferred toast-with as much jam as he could sneak before getting his fingers smacked. Growing up, the boys had had voracious appetites, and were seemingly always hungry.
Grandma Cassie had indulged her growing boys, always having plenty of snacks on hand and big, delicious meals to provide them with the energy needed to race around the grounds and terrorize the barnyard cats. Casey had been fine with whatever cookies, or granola bars he could find, but Sid always wanted toast if hunger struck him before noon.
It was even better after Grandma had finished reading her Tolkien books to them when Casey was eight years old, and Sid was just turning thirteen. The characters in the book who were always hungry, had reminded their grandmother of themselves, and she had acted accordingly.
"Grandma Cassie's hobbits," Casey snickered. "God, I almost forgot."
"How could you forget that?" Sid snorted, still chuckling. "What did she say as we were growing up? Short, chunky, and with bottomless pits for stomachs. Thank God we each hit growth spurts to make up for all the thirds, fourths and elevenses she indulged."
"I never believed her when she said she thought our feet were getting hairier," Casey said, nodding his head.
The silence that had hit them early disappeared under the weight of far happier memories, and they whittled away at the rest of their meal, playing the age old game of 'remember when'. Any leftover negative thoughts, be they Sid's past or his mother's ailment in general, faded to the background, and he wound up ordering a second stack of pancakes alongside Sid and his renewed order of toast. Breakfast took them over an hour to complete.
For some reason, Casey would always look back on that breakfast as being one of the best he'd ever eaten.
o0o...o0o
96969696969696969696969696969696969696969696
o0o...o0o
Somehow, on the way back up to Oncology, the discussion turned a bit more personal, and Casey found himself fending off questions about his apparent love life. Sid, normally rude and crude on the subject of women, was actually treating the topic with a bit more diplomacy then he ever had in the past, which meant Casey couldn't hit him. Yet.
"So you and April never did it yet?"
"SID!" Casey growled. "What the heck makes you think I'd tell ya somethin' like that?"
Sid grinned disarmingly. "Wishful thinking?"
Casey rolled his eyes and smacked his cousin upside the head. Despite the fact that Sid was the older of the two, it was like he had become the Michaelangelo of the Jones family. Which would make me Raph, Casey smirked. That would explain the head smacking.
"Look, April is...ya just don't talk about April like that. No locker room shit, okay? She's better then that." Casey leveled a stern look at his cousin who nodded and conceded the point.
"I gotcha, I gotcha. Still," Sid sighed. "She is a fine piece of work." He winked at Casey. "You are a damn lucky man."
"Don't I know it," Casey replied softly. A brief vision of flowing red hair and soft, glowing skin formed in his head. Long legs and a killer smile. Smart, sophisticated, with a great sense of humor. Strong. Loyal.
His.
How the hell did I get so damn lucky?
Sid was watching him with a knowing look when Casey came back to himself. "Took a detour into happy land, huh?"
Casey smiled. "Yeah."
"So how long you two been together?"
Casey blinked and thought about the question. "Um...not sure, really." But that didn't sound like the right answer-or even a good one, even to himself.
Sid was looking at him like he agreed with his mental thoughts, even though there was no way for him to have heard them. "Dude, how can you not know?"
"'Cause we're not really, together together," he said, scratching his head sheepishly. "It's kinda weird."
"I'll buy that," Sid nodded. "You guys looked pretty 'together' at the farmhouse last year. What happened?"
"Nothing happened. Then or now." Casey led the way back into the waiting room, casting a suspicious look around for Bianca. She wasn't there but another nurse, in yellow scrubs this time, was grabbing some folders off the desk. "Excuse me, miss?"
The nurse looked at him. She was older, Casey was relieved to note, and had a professional, busy air to her. "Yes sir?"
"I was wondering if you could tell me how my mother's doing? Adelina Jones? She has chemo and radiation therapy today and it's been almost an hour since I seen her."
The nurse nodded. "I'll find one of the regular doctors or nurses and send them down to you - would that be all right? I'm not normally in this department, so I wouldn't know the particular details of your mother's treatment."
Casey nodded. "That'd be great. Thanks miss."
"Of course." She smiled and walked off down the hall. Casey watched her leave and then sat down on the plastic chairs - from Hell, he decided, shifting uncomfortably-and then blinked as Sid plopped down next to him, staring at him intently.
"What?"
"Yeah, like I'm gonna let you get away without finishing that little story." Sid snorted. "What do you mean you aren't together? You love the girl don't you?"
"Yeah," he said gruffly. "I do. 'Least, I think I do." After all, that was a big, scary word to be throwing around casually.
"And she obviously feels something for you, right? I mean, you two were practically glued at the hip when I saw ya."
"She cares for me. She cares for everybody," Casey said, matter-of-factly. "It's just...it's never come up, ya know? We both know there's something there, but it's not like I have a claim on her or anything. We hold hands, we've gone on a few walks, but we usually get interrupted. I remember one time she specifically said flat out we were not on a date when all of our friends thought we were. We ain't, like, official." Then he gave a goofy little grin. "But I do owe her a date for standing her up."
"You stood her up? And she didn't beat the crap out of you?"
"It was the night Ma came down, to tell me about, well, this." Casey waved his hand at the Oncology department they were currently sitting in, and Sid deflated instantly.
"Oh."
"Yeah, oh," Casey echoed.
They sat in silence for a few more minutes, before Sid casually asked, "So, does she know?"
"Didn't tell her."
"Why not?" Sid looked confused, which made Casey grin a little. At least he wasn't the only one without a clue.
"Not really sure," he confessed. With a sigh, Casey leaned back and folded his arms, staring at the tops of his battered hightops like they held all the answers he was searching for. "She's got enough to deal with right now, and this is me and Ma's problem, not hers."
"That's a lousy excuse, kiddo," Sid said dryly. "From what I can tell of your girl, she'll probably be pissed off you ain't mentioned it yet."
"Probably," Casey nodded. He wasn't that stupid. He was well aware that keeping secrets from April was not a good way to win her favor. That didn't mean he wasn't going to keep a few things to himself temporarily, though.
"So give me a better excuse."
Casey glared at his older cousin, who smirked at him innocently. "I ain't got one."
Sid grinned. "At least now you're being honest about it."
o0o...o0o
96969696969696969696969696969696969696969696
o0o...o0o
According to the doctor, his mother was proceeding with her treatments just fine, and there was nothing to worry about. That didn't prevent Casey from jumping to his feet the instant she appeared around the corner. Sid didn't necessarily jump, but he did get to his feet to follow behind.
"How ya feelin', ma?" Casey asked, looking her over anxiously. His mother shrugged, rubbing one arm slowly.
"Tired," she said wearily. "And cold. I should have brought my jacket."
Sid silently shrugged off his trench coat and handed it over without a word. Adelina looked at it like she thought it was going to disintegrate into a thousand pieces of worn and dirty leather, but then she shrugged and gave him a small smile. "Thank you, Sid."
"Sure."
She pulled it on and got one arm caught-Casey had to help her, and she shot him a venomous look, yanking her arm away. "I'm not helpless." she hissed, eyes flashing.
Casey was well-versed in dealing with his mother's 'evil eyes' and glared right back. "I never said ya were, ma."
"I can put on my own damn coat!"
"Technically, it's my damn coat," Sid pointed out calmly, staring up at the ceiling as though it held the answers to life's mysteries.
Adelina glared and looked as though she was going to say something particularly scathing in nature, when her face paled and she swayed a little on her feet. Without saying a word, Casey had her by one arm, and Sid stood by the other, ready to assist her should she require it.
It was just a brief dizzy spell, a single moment of weakness - but it was enough to take the wind from her sails, and Adelina sighed, letting her anger seep away. It took energy she just didn't have at the moment to keep the fight going, and in the end, she didn't really want to fight her son. Or her nephew. What she wanted to fight didn't have a physical form for her to beat up.
Sid stood with her in the hospital entrance while Casey brought the car around. He offered to take the back seat, but she insisted she'd rather stretch out her legs and try to make up for the previous night's lost sleep, and wound up napping most of the way home. She woke up in time to hear Casey asking Sid about his apparent love life.
"--and I since you got such a kick out of grilling me, it's only fair."
"Well, ask away, cuz - just don't get angry if there ain't anything interesting. I told you, I don't have a girlfriend."
Casey tilted his head, briefly shooting Sid a considering look before returning his eyes to the road. "Boyfriend?"
Sid choked on a laugh. "Dude! I may have experimented a time or two in the past, but I generally prefer my dates blond and busty." He waggled his eyebrows.
"Experimented, huh? Sounds like you've got a few interesting stories hiding away after all," Casey commented, grinning. Then his eyes narrowed thoughtfully. "Blond and busty, hmm? So I was right-there is a good chance you can take Nurse Horn-dog off my hands."
"Ahh, sweet Bianca," Sid sighed, putting a hand on his chest. "The very thought of her fair image doth stir my heart in my chest." He snickered. "Among other things."
"And that would be the part where I say I don't want to hear it," Adelina muttered, pushing herself fully upright in the back seat, coughing lightly. "How far out are we?"
"Be home in ten minutes, Ma," Casey said, tossing her a concerned look in the rear view mirror.
Sid turned around in his seat. "How ya feelin', Auntie Addie?"
Sore. Tired. Nauseas. "Fine," she said shortly.
Casey and Sid exchanged knowing looks and she fought back the urge to stick her tongue out at them. Just who is the adult here? She fumed silently. Thankfully, they let the subject drop for the time being. The farmhouse eventually came into view on the horizon, and as they drew closer, Sid blinked.
"You cut the grass? I thought something that wild and untamed would put up more of a fight."
Casey thought of Mikey and Donnie subduing the lawnmower and attacking the lawn with war-whoops and battle cries. "You'd be surprised."
He pulled up in front of the house next to his mother's Volvo. Adelina got out unassisted and stretched. She still felt a bit shaky but she didn't want to go in and lie down just yet. "Gonna give Sid the tour?"
Casey eyed her strangely. "Ma, we spent every summer here when we was kids. And he refreshed his memory when he was here last year, remember?"
Adelina waved her finger at him. "Ah, but he didn't see the new and improved farmhouse-that-Casey-built."
Sid nodded. "Yeah, Case-man-I'm impressed. I had no idea you were such a talented Holly Homemaker." He grinned at Casey and ducked the automatic swing at his head. "When you were doing all these repairs bro, I hope you didn't replace the barn wall."
"What, remove the proof of your idiocy?" Casey shook his head. "Never. C'mon, I'll show ya what's been added."
"I'll go and get dinner started, boys," Adelina said, glancing at her watch. It was still early afternoon-her treatments had been finished by one o'clock, and the ride home barely took two hours, but none of them had had lunch. If she knew the boys-and she most certainly did - they were starving and wouldn't object to a early meal. Casey glanced at her again, and she stifled the automatic sigh that tried to escape her.
"I'm fine, Casey. I slept most of the way home, remember?" She reached out and gave them both a shove, sending them stumbling forward. "Go. Explore. Play. Visit the Sasquatches. Weed the garden. Something. Anything. I don't care what. I want one hour's peace from both of you, understand?"
"Yes ma'am," they chorused. Adelina nodded sharply, turned, and went into the house. As the door slammed shut behind her, she heard Sid ask in a confused voice,
"Sasquatches?"
o0o...o0o
96969696969696969696969696969696969696969696
o0o...o0o
Despite her careful dinner preparations - heavy on the light, easily digested foods that were easy to re-wrap for snacking on later - and going to bed early in an attempt to placate her son and nephew by taking it easy, Adelina still woke up at midnight with that familiar feeling.
"Damn it," she croaked, and flung the covers off, rolling over to try and make it to the bathroom in time. A wave of dizziness overcame her and she stumbled in mid-step, going down to one knee. The change in elevation sent a direct signal from her brain to her stomach and she vomited right there, on top of her pink, fuzzy slippers.
Gasping, she sat back and tried to catch her breath but a second surge hit her and she doubled over again, hands planted against the floor, bracing herself while her stomach did its best to turn itself inside out. Tears leaked down her face, dripping off her cheekbones and she panted, harsh, open-mouthed gasps that only helped suck the smell back in. She threw up again.
Vomit pooled around her hands, her hair dangling in it, and it took every ounce of strength to keep herself from planting her face in the god-awful mess.
"Arnold," she choked out. By the gods, she did not want her son to see her like this, but she needed help. Her vision was blacking out at the edges, and she did not want her obituary to read 'drowned in her own puke.' Her voice was little more then a rasp, but she tried again. "Casey..."
A light turned on in the hallway, the familiar tattoo of footsteps heading for her room. Her door swung open, letting the light shine in on what she knew had to be the most revolting scene her son could ever think to see. He stood there in the doorway, a silhouette framed by the light of the naked bulb in the hallway, probably frozen in disgusted shock.
She couldn't do it. Her head lowered an inch, her arms were wobbling. "Case--"
And then he was there, an arm wrapped gently around her waist, lifting her up. She knew she looked gross, vomit splatter all over her face, hands and hair, but her son didn't hesitate for even a minute. He slipped his other arm under her knees and picked her up, cradling her to his chest as carefully as a mother with a newborn, like she had once held him. She closed her eyes, letting tears of pain and exhaustion have free reign over their actions, and they chose to slide down her face, adding to the mess she'd already created.
Casey murmured something and her eyes snapped open to see Sid's tall form whirling around and running out of the room. God, how bad do I look if I can send grown men running for cover? She thought, closing her eyes again, but then she heard the sound of water running and realized her nephew had gone ahead to ready the bathroom for her. Casey carried her out into the hallway and Sid came out, gesturing for them to go in. Adelina cracked one eye open, almost afraid of what she'd see on his face. Disgust, maybe the look of one grossed out beyond all belief, or maybe something else, like resignation, as though he'd probably signed up for this by agreeing to come to the farmhouse in the first place.
She wasn't ready for him to lay a hand on her arm in an attempt to offer some sort of comfort. She blinked, a bit stunned at the look of concern and worry on his face, and she shut her eyes again.
Casey set her down on the toilet seat lid. She could hear him rummaging around for things and then he was asking her to look at him. She did.
"Ma, do you need help?"
Embarrassment flooded through her and pride made her thrust her vomit-covered jaw up. "I can take it from here," she said. Her breath was still coming in heavy pants, but not the pained wheezing it had been a few minutes ago.
Casey looked frustrated, but then he nodded. Sid knocked on the door and Casey strode over and opened it, accepting a cloth bundle Adelina recognized as her spare pajama set. He put it on the counter and then looked at her again.
"I'll be right outside. I'll leave the door mostly closed, but I want it open a bit in case you fall or are sick again. Okay?"
Adelina growled. "I will be sick again if I have to sit here smelling this much longer."
Casey glared at her, and repeated, "Okay?"
"Yes!" She barked at him, humiliation sweeping through her. Bad enough her son was getting used to her midnight throw-up sessions, but tonight's little episode left her with no illusions left. She was in no position to argue with him over what she could and couldn't do and she knew it, but that didn't mean she had to like it. Or be nice about it. She pointed a finger at the door. "Get out!" Belatedly, she tacked on a, "Please," to take a bit of the sting out. Casey nodded and left. True to his word, the door was left cracked open about half a foot.
Moving as slowly as molasses in January, she pulled her soiled pajama top off, and shucked out of the bottoms. The water was already hot and steaming, and she stepped in, giving a sigh of relief as the warm spray erased the sick taint from her body. She braced her arms against the wall and let her head hang directly under the nozzle, watching with a trace of morbid amusement as solid clumps of what used to be dinner fell with soft 'splats' to the ground, swirling around the drain.
It hit her then. It had begun. What Doctor O'Brien had been saying would happen. Her son would watch her die, and this was the first step. Tonight, Casey had seen her as weak as a newborn kitten, scrabbling on the floor in her own puke, helpless, like she'd never considered herself to be in her entire life.
Her lip twitched and she bit it savagely, sending a spark of pain jolting through her face. But the move didn't stop what was about to happen-what needed to happen, and Adelina felt her face crumple, squeezing her eyes shut in a last ditch effort to hold her emotions at bay.
It didn't work.
Adelina gasped, and then thick tears began streaming down her face, mixing with the shower spray, and harsh sobs began to erupt from deep within. The last thing she thought before she gave over completely, was that she hoped the sound of the falling water would block the sound of her crying.
o0o...o0o
96969696969696969696969696969696969696969696
o0o...o0o
She stayed in the shower as long as she could, but it seemed like no time at all had passed before Casey was at the door, giving it a light tap of warning. "Ma?"
"Yeah," she croaked. "Coming."
She turned off the water and grabbed a towel, still moving slowly. The world was not exactly a stable place for her at the moment. She took a few minutes to dress and brush her teeth, noting with zero amusement that Casey never wavered from his post by the door.
Stubborn. Over-protective. Gee, I wonder where he gets it from?
Adelina smiled. It was a small smile, tainted with exhaustion, but it was there, and with it came a small amount of her self-respect. Just enough, that she felt she could face her son again, and she pushed the door all the way open to see her son staring at her.
She opened her mouth to thank him for taking care of her.
"Did you have fun cleaning up?" was what came out instead.
Casey cocked his head to the side,and she wondered a tad hysterically if he was going to insist on them hashing it out while she had the physical and emotional strength of a used piece of tissue. Then a hint of amusement joined the concern on his face, and she breathed a sigh of relief. "This is revenge for all those times I threw up on you as a kid, right?"
"You bet," she said, nodding devoutly. "Considering how many times that happened between the ages of one day to two years, plus your third birthday party when you stole three extra slices of chocolate cake, and the bronchitis you got every year, eight years in a row...I think I still have a ways to go before we're anywhere close to being even."
Casey shrugged. "You forgot the circus when I was seven," he pointed out, mildly. "Two bags of cotton candy, a caramel apple, and three hot dogs before the Tilt-A-Whirl did NOT make for a happy ending."
"Oh, I don't know," Sid said casually, joining them in the hallway. "I had fun that day."
"You weren't the one that had to clean him up," Adelina muttered. But she took in the water spots on his clothes, and the plastic bag dangling from one hand. But apparently, he did the clean up this time.
Her embarrassment threatened to make a return. Sid seemed to notice though, and leaned forward, giving her a kiss on the cheek and a gentle, "Good night," before disappearing downstairs to dispose of the bag. Casey walked her to her room and she blinked at the sight of a large bucket sitting on the floor by her bed. She glanced at Casey and saw him fidget, obviously expecting her to say something.
She sighed and gave him a wry grin. "Too bad we didn't think of this before bedtime."
Casey chuckled. "Yeah." He leaned forward and kissed her other cheek. "Good night Ma. Shout if you need me, okay?"
She almost brushed him off with her usual reply of how she'd be fine, when she saw beyond his smile for just a second. It had wavered, like a holographic card that had a hidden picture lying beneath the surface, that appears when you tilt it a certain way. The concern in his eyes, the taughtness of his jaw, the pale tint in his skin-they all revealed to her once again that she wasn't the only one scared. She relented.
"I will," she said instead, making it a promise. Casey smiled, a real smile this time, and Adelina fell asleep feeling a bit better after all.
o0o...o0o
96969696969696969696969696969696969696969696
o0o...o0o
End Chapter 6
Notes: Not quite sure where the LotR reference came from but it just hit me while I was writing and it demanded to be added. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It's hard balancing Adelina's mentality with her sickness and finding a level of reality without becoming too cliched.
One Small Monkey helped me with revisions for chapters 1 and 2, so I'll be posting the cleaned (again) versions shortly. Thanks OSM!
Chapter 7 is plotted out but remains to be actually written. Okay, I have 2 pages. Heh. Same goes for chapter 8 (well, minus the 2 pages). I need some motivation. Blah.