Disclaimer - CSI:NY is not mine...
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Danny arrived at the hospital as soon as his workload had allowed. He had been forced to slip out of the lab this time, and Adam had promised to cover for him for as long as he could.
He had been doing this for so long now he could almost do the entire trip on autopilot and he almost smiled to himself at the thought as he threaded his way through the numerous doctors, nurses, patients and equipment that thronged the corridors of this part of the hospital.
He had already passed the nurses station and reached Louie's door when he finally heard his name being called. He was tempted to continue ignoring it, to hasten his pace and hurry through that door to the relative security and peace and quiet of his brother's room. But good manners prevailed and he stopped and turned to face the nurse that had followed him up the corridor. He almost flinched when she reached out to touch his arm.
One look at her face was all it took. One look to realise and have everything crash down around him, for his eyes to fill and his breath to hitch. That same look he had seen so many times before on the faces of his colleagues and no doubt he had worn himself; that look of sympathy, of concern, of pity and he could feel the awful reaction it provoked welling up inside of him all hot and burning and ready to churn out on the first person it could.
His vision seemed to tunnel and narrow so all he could see was that expression, his world shrinking until all it consisted of was that single look.
"No." It came out sounding thin and weak.
Sympathy shifted to understanding. "Detective Messer…"
"No…" He shook his head vehemently. "No."
Understanding shifted to concern as he roughly plucked her hand from his arm and he turned away from that face, that expression to push open the door.
He rushed headlong into the tiny room, his head spinning and his emotions a jumbled churning mass inside him.
Louie.
He lay there motionless as always, neatly tucked into blankets, his skin pale against the sheets and bandages. The scene was as familiar as always and his heart nearly leapt, a relieved grin almost lifted his features, except it was quiet. Too quiet. At first Danny couldn't place what was wrong, but then he realised.
The machines were silent. There was no reassuring beep from the heart monitor, no deep subdued whoosh from the ventilator. No muted electrical hum.
Nothing.
Danny stared at his brother blindly for what seemed like an eon, all of his focus willing something to happen. Anything. But nothing happened and eventually Danny simply sank into the bedside chair. He felt numb. All those emotions that had been rushing around inside of him only moments ago had simply disappeared. Evaporated and now he was left feeling like he had been hulled out, cored like an apple.
He felt empty.