A/N: I'd like to admit something: I'm a gossip whore. I love reading tabloids and I love reading gossip blogs. There's just something about them that's so juicy, so satisfying and so… mindless. That's sort of what I'm trying to achieve here. I want this to just be a collection of mindless, enjoyable short stories written like articles and stuff like that.

Originally this story was supposed to be completely Lily-centric. Then I realized how stupid that was. Tabloids don't solely focus on one person, no matter how intriguing they are (think Britney Spears or Angelina Jolie). So having a story written like a collection of tabloid articles chronicling Lily's every move is a little stupid.

So now I'm going to write the story with a whole bunch of people involved. There are going to be a lot of chapters that are L/J, a few that center around the staff, some about other Marauders and still others about any other characters I like. Each chapter is going to be the "cover story" of that week's issue, and the chapters aren't necessarily all related. They are going to occur in chronological order, but the only real continuing story line is going to be that of Lily and James. The rest are just going to be fun fillers. )

This is experimental, and I really hope it works out. I'm a little iffy on the structure of this story, so please feel free to leave as much feedback as you want. And if you think of any brilliant ideas about characters in specific situations, you can tell me and I'll write about it and credit you as the source.

Disclaimer: I am nothing but a student. I don't any of the rights to anything and I'm not making any money off of this. So… don't sue please and thanks!

CRASH AND BURN OF THE NON-COUPLE

Is this the end of the Pax Head-people-a?

If there is one thing that's not a secret in this school it has to be the rocky relationship between our beloved Head Boy and Girl. Many of Lily Evans and James Potter's fights have been quite public and memorable: who can forget the time in fifth year when Lily pushed James into the lake? And what about the time when James charmed a cloud of sparkles that read, "HEX ME, I DESERVE IT" follow the redheaded firecracker around for a week?

Yes, the student body – and possibly the professors – all have fond memories of the pair snarking and snapping and cursing each other.

But could it all be over? The Hearsay has learned that Evans and Potter, both 17, have had the fight to end all fights this past weekend.

"It was really bad," an anonymous tipster tells the Hearsay. "I was in my dormitory and I could hear them going at it in the common room, and my room is seven floors up!"

Yet people in Gryffindor, the school house of both Evans and Potter, can attest to the fact that they fight regularly in the common room. Some say that it has become rather entertaining and that the students watch it as if it were some sort of show. Also, the entire school can attest to the fact that both of them have really loud voices that can carry quite admirably. So why is this fight so different?

"It's because James has a new girlfriend," says our tipster. "You know Emmeline Vance, right? Well, he's dating Emmeline Vance. At least they were snogging pretty hardcore in the broom cupboard. I would know if it was hardcore or not. I found them. Oh, I wasn't using the broom cupboard to do anything like that, I just wanted a broom. And I found them. And then I was all, 'Whoa, that's intense' because it was. So yeah. He's dating Emmeline."

Well, okay then. One might say that it's about time. After all, Potter is one of the most eligible bachelors at Hogwarts. He is Head Boy, captain of the Gryffindor quidditch team, has top marks and a devilish grin that is slightly lopsided. He's quite the catch, and it's the opinion of many people that he has pined for Evans for far too long. It's rumored that he began to fancy her in their first year, expressed his "undying love" for her in their fifth and then proceeded to ask her out everyday for a year.

Yeah, it's about time he got over her. No offense, but it was getting sad.

It's unclear why Evans took the news so hard, but upon hearing it from a third party, she immediately sought Potter out and began to scold him and telling him that a girlfriend would only distract him from his Head duties that he has been dutifully ignoring ever since he received the post. She went on to tell him that having a girlfriend was bad for him and that he didn't really know how to treat women and she was better off without him.

Quite a mouth on that one, eh?

Potter didn't take the last few comments very well and shot back with a carefully aimed, "How would you know? Why do you care? We're not friends, we were never friends and so I really don't give a rat's arse about what you think. I'm not the person you think I am, Evans, and I think I like it that way. So kindly take you nose out of my business and start looking out for yourself because you need far more help than I do."

He was vindictive and mean, which is surprising because Potter has hardly ever reacted in a hostile manner towards Evans' barbs. He would normally prank her, call her names or just laugh at her and provoke her some more. To actually reply maliciously is something new, and Evans didn't appear to know how to react. So after a moment of blinking surprise she stomped on his foot and stomped her way out of the common room as people quickly jumped out of her way to avoid getting stomped on.

This occurred of Saturday evening. It is now Tuesday and they still have not spoken to each other despite the fact that they lead the Prefect meeting yesterday and they have a group project due in potions along with Remus Lupin and Henry Goyle on Friday.

Since the school year began a week and a day ago, it seemed as though they were willing to put aside their differences and work together as the Heads. Without them speaking, will it mess up with our school events? Will we ever see another humorous public spat? Will Evans' hair be turned pink again? And, most importantly, with Potter's girlfriend in the picture, will a Lily-James union ever come about?

For now, the answer seems like no to every question above. Let us take a moment of silence to grieve for the loss of the tumultuous non-friendship of our favourite non-couple. It was fun while it lasted, probably more for us spectators than for the people who were involved.

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, good night.

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