Author's Note: Woo! So, before anyone yells at me and accuses me of plagiarizing, I would just like to mention that the lovely Aquamarine101 has oh-so-kindly lent me her story idea. Yeah. Just a head's up!
This chapter is just an intro for the next chapter – and a very short and retarded intro at that – but next chapter will represent my own personal views. I feel like expressing my own personal views and so, because of the Freedom of Speech – which is not a right to be abused – I will express my opinions!
But that's all next chapter. Cos for now, all you gots to do is read, review, and enjoy!

It was a Friday night and all members of The Pretty Committee were unrolling their sleeping bags – which were fabricated from the softest satin Claire had ever touched – when Massie had one of her great epiphanies.

"Guys," she said, her eyes twinkling, "I just had a great epiphany."

"Ooh, what is it? Are we going to prank-call Derrick?" Claire exclaimed.

"No, Kuh-laire, even better. Remember how that Kori girl was babbling awwwn and awwwn about how she was this great writer in English yesterday? Well, apparently she actually posts stories online. About Harry Potter." Massie smirked.

The girls collectively expressed their disdain for such an LBR habit.

"Wait – how do you know she posts stories online?" Dylan furrowed her eyebrows in bemusement. Massie's smirk quickly faded.

"I just know, okay?" she snapped. "Anyway," she continued, "I think we should go on Fanfiction and say mean things about her."

"Ooh, that's a good one. But how do you know what the site's called?" Alicia said, playing with a lock of her black, silky hair.

"I just told you that I just know so stop asking questions and let me explain. So…what do you guys think?"

"Let's do it," Claire said.

After receiving supporting nods from the rest of the group, Massie went over to her iMac and turned it on. Once everything was loaded, she typed the URL in the address bar and the writing site's homepage appeared in less than a second.

"Ehmygawd, there are over two hundred thousand stories about some stupid wizard book?" Dylan gaped at the screen. "That's…that's…sick."

"I know. Now, if my suspicions are correct, Kori will have just recently published another chapter of whatever she writes and it should be on first page now."

Funnily enough, Massie's "suspicions" were correct.

3. Harry Potter and the Garrulous Gorillas by Kori the Katastrophic reviews
Harry is an exponent for a talking gorilla tribe endemic to England that wishes to seek respite from poachers. The gorillas are taken to Hogwarts where they grow to become as intelligent as their ancestor, Ishmael. But when the poachers are recruited into Voldemort's army of Death Eaters, only trouble can ensue… chap 95 up!

"Ehmygawd, ninety-five chapters?" Alicia shrieked. "She must spend every millisecond on the computer. She's like, a Loser Way Beyond Repair. Like a LBWR." She looked over at Massie to see if she'd acknowledge her ah-mazing acronym but was surprised to find her friend strangely engrossed in Kori's stupid – stupid, right? – story. "Um, Massie, aren't we supposed to say something mean?"

"Hmm – I mean, oh! Yes! Something mean. Why don't you guys type something?"

"Okay, okay, I got it." Alicia scooted Massie aside and, while her friends peered over her shoulder, typed:

Review Story: Harry Potter and the Garrulous Gorillas
Log-In to submit a signed/verified review.

Name: I hate you because you suck and so does your story
Review: Omg ur story sux! learn how 2 use good grammer and spelling b4 u ever rite ever again! go die!

Alicia sat back in the seat with a satisfactory grin and looked over at Massie for her approval, which she received in the form of a slight nod.

"Very nice," Massie said. "I'm sure Kori will like, upload a new chapter saying how pissed she is and then we can report her and have her account deleted! So cli–"

"Wait," Kristen interrupted. "Shouldn't we like…oh, I dunno, sound smarter than she is so we can be the better person?"

Claire opened her mouth to say something along the lines of, "With words like endemic and garrulous? Kind of impossible, don't you think?" but thought the better of it. Especially since Massie gave her – Kristen – an evil look.

"It's called flay-ming, Kristen. You're supposed to be mean."

"Yeah, I know, but…oh, never mind. But what is a flame, anyway, and how do you know what it means?"

"I SAID I JUST DO, FOR GAWDSAKES!" Massie screeched. Once the steam that had quite literally emitted from her ears dissipated into the air, she gave everyone a big smile. "Never mind me! Just submit it."

Afterward they sat there, staring at the screen, waiting for a new hi-my-name-is-Strawberry-Kori-and-I'm-super-pissed chapter to come out.

Nothing.

Massie checked her watch; it had been fifteen minutes.

Still nothing.

"Maybe we should go to her profile," Kristen suggested.

And so they did.

pen name : Kori the Katastrophic
contact : send message
user id : 1234321
since : 10-07-06

oOo 5/21/07 oOo
Just a few minutes ago I received a rather ludicrous (if I do say so myself) review from someone whom I bet is a highly disreputable individual. Just go to "Harry Potter and the Garrulous Gorillas" and you'll see what I mean. D:
Is that not – as I previously mentioned – hilarious? The person is the most inveterate hypocrite I have ever come across. Come on, now: did they really think I would be perturbed by a remark of such "intelligence?" /sarcasm/ I won't even bother deleting it because I want everybody to see how the world had been overcome by idiots. If you really want to insult me I suggest you create a penname so we can debate my grammar skills over PM.

Toodles!

- Kori

The girls could only gawk at the screen in shock. They had been publicly dissed by some LBR.

"At least she didn't put our names up," Claire said in an attempt to placate her friends.

"How could she? We didn't even leave them." Massie threw Claire The Look.

Oh.

"Ugh, why don't we just go to another section?" Dylan examined her nails, becoming bored with all the Harry Potter stuff.

"Ah-greed," Massie said. She regained control of the chair and scrolled around for a bit before coming upon a category labeled "Clique".

"Hey, don't cliques always have boyfriends? So maybe they'll be juicy romance stories!" Alicia exclaimed. "We should totally read some."

However, when the stories appeared, the girls gasped in shock. Because there were over two hundred stories…

All about them.