Please remember that this is narrated by "Rosie," a Wammy's House student that I made up. It is definitely a total coincidence that her name starts with R, just like mine. See my page for for the "Dear Reader" letter if you haven't read it yet.
You'll notice that in scenes that don't directly include the Baudelaires, I drop Snicket's style... If this is too weird and abrupt please let me know. (But only if it's excessive, because I do treasure the break from writing in his style... it's exhausting.)
I'm so sorry for the delay on this chapter. I finished it during Christmas break, but have been really slow in getting it edited and up. Doumo sumimasen. I don't know when the next one will be up either. I'm having a really hard time getting started. Moushi wake arimasen!!
Persistence is the trait of sticking to something until you've achieved what you wanted, and people will often tell you that it is a good trait to have. If you have ever experienced someone else's persistence, however, you may find that it can be rather annoying. For example, if a waiter persists in trying to convince you to try a snail casserole, but you are allergic to snails, not only will the waiter irritate you, but he could endanger your health. If a construction worker persisted in building a new house right next to your own, you may be woken up several mornings in a row to the sound of a jackhammer outside your window, which is a very unpleasant sound. And if your parents persist in concealing your birthday present from you, you may find yourself very frustrated and uncertain as to what the present is. For these reasons, persistence can sometimes seem to be more bad than good.
Though the Baudelaires were all persistent children themselves, they, too, were often irritated by others' persistence. They were inconvenienced by Poe's persistent inability to help them. They were terrified by Olaf's persistent attempts to steal their fortune. And they were anguished by misfortune's persistent habit of hovering over them.
Unluckily for the Baudelaires, we are very persistent in getting what we want, and we are not subtle.
Mello was slightly late to dinner; the Baudelaires and Matt had already taken seats at the usual table and begun eating their chicken salads by the time he clattered his tray down on the table and sat. "Hi." He took a bite of his salad and then looked at the Baudelaires. "So you've spent a whole day at Wammy's now," he commented. "Have your impressions changed from this morning?"
The Baudelaires looked at each other. They thought about class that morning, how quickly everyone had read, and the difficult subjects they had tackled. They thought about the alphabet soup they'd had for lunch and the chicken salad they were having for dinner. And they thought about the wonderful hours they'd spent in the library, reading for fun and then studying their individual interests. All in all, Wammy's House had turned out to be a satisfactory—maybe even better than satisfactory—place to live so far. "I like it here," Klaus said. "It's certainly better than several of the places we've stayed since our parents died." His sisters nodded in agreement.
"Several of the places you've stayed?" Mello questioned. "Have you lived in a lot of different places?"
The Baudelaires sighed. "Tasan," Sunny replied glumly.
"We keep getting moved around to many different homes," Violet translated. "And not all of them have been pleasant."
Mello cocked his head. "What's the least pleasant place you've stayed?"
"With Count Olaf," Klaus replied at once with a shudder. "He made us do impossible chores, struck me across the face, hung Sammi in a birdcage from his tower room, and tried to marry Vanessa by forcing her to perform in a play by Al Funcoot."
"Tried to marry her?" Mello asked incredulously.
"To get his hands on our fortune," Violet explained. "Our parents left behind an enormous fortune that we'll inherit when I come of age, but if he'd married me, as my legal husband he would have had control over my finances."
"That's just creepy," commented Matt, who wasn't playing any video game this time.
"Daro," Sunny said. She meant something along the lines of, "You're telling me."
"Because of that, we were removed from his care," Klaus added, "but he's been following us around from guardian to guardian, trying to steal our fortune and making our lives miserable, ever since."
Mello frowned. "I can see why we're supposed to watch out for this guy. Have you guys had any good experiences with guardians?"
The Baudelaires looked at each other sadly.
"To tell the truth," Violet said, "we've had a few very kind guardians, but Olaf always shows up and does something awful."
"Uncamonty…" Sunny said in her tiny voice.
"He poisoned Uncle Monty, the herpetologist who was our guardian right after Olaf," Klaus expanded, "and threw our third guardian, Aunt Josephine, into the jaws of carnivorous leeches."
"And although one of our most recent guardians, Jerome Squalor, was nice enough," Violet said, "his wife Esme was working with Count Olaf the whole time."
"Wow, I'm sorry," Mello said. "That sucks. That guy sounds horrible."
"Yep," Sunny said.
"He needs to be locked up!" Mello continued heatedly. The word "heatedly" here does not mean that he suddenly developed a fever, but that there was passion and determination in his voice. "Are you guys going back to the library tonight? I can help you look for incriminating information on him or something."
Klaus shook his head. "Actually, we were planning to visit Ms. Masen and get caught up with what we'll be learning here."
"Oh," said Mello. "Good idea." But he persisted, "What about tomorrow then? During free rec or something. I want to help catch this villain."
Matt peered at the enthusiastic boy. "I thought you said you hated spending rec in the—"
"This is more important!" Mello replied, cutting Matt off with a glare. "This guy has to be brought to justice!"
"Oh," Matt said. "I see." He looked down at his salad, and the Baudelaires had the odd feeling that they had missed something.
Nevertheless, Violet asked Mello, "Do you really think we'd be able to find enough information in the library to incriminate Olaf?"
"You can find anything in our library," Mello boasted, and he fixed the Baudelaires with a persistent stare. "So it's a deal then?"
"Sure," Klaus said.
"Great! Tomorrow at two-fifteen. Free rec in the library. I can't wait."
"Ankyuu," Sunny said.
"No problem. Don't forget!"
The Baudelaires finished their chicken salad and stood. "Where might we find Ms. Masen at this hour, by the way?" Violet asked.
Mello tipped his head to the side and thought. "Probably in her room. It's on the left side of the far hallway upstairs, and there's a plaque on her door, so you can't miss it."
"All right," Klaus said. "We'd better be going, then. It was nice meeting you two today."
"Same goes to you three," Mello replied, and Matt nodded. "Don't forget, you're not allowed in the attic. And remember—free rec in the library tomorrow!"
The Baudelaires nodded, but it was a slightly curt nod; the final reminder had made Mello's persistent repetition conspicuous, a word which here means "stand out," and it annoyed them slightly. It seemed almost like he thought they were stupid children who wouldn't remember unless reminded constantly. Nevertheless, when he smiled they smiled back, and then they went to find the teacher.
"You probably could have done without that last reminder," Matt muttered once they were out of earshot. "They're not going to forget."
"Just making sure," Mello replied defensively. "This is important." Now that the Baudelaires were gone, he began shoveling the chicken salad into his mouth in a hurry.
"You in a hurry?" Matt asked, watching him slyly.
"Of course," Mello replied.
"To go where?"
Finishing his salad with record speed, Mello stood. "To the attic, of course."
-----Elsewhere, minutes later
As the detective L took a deep breath and inhaled the scent of his strawberry cake, a beep from his computer indicated an incoming message. L crouched and picked up his microphone. "What is it, Watari?"
"L, Mello has come to the attic," came the reply from his speakers, and L nodded, unsurprised.
"Good. Connect the video feed."
A video image of the Wammy's House attic flashed onto L's screen, and Mello was indeed standing there. "Hello, L," the boy said. He was speaking to a computer screen with only the letter "L," on it, but the detective suspected that he was long since used to that.
"Greetings, Mello," L said into the microphone. "I expected you a little earlier. Near has been here already."
"I know." Mello's face was too blank when he said this; obviously it was intentional. "But I have some information on the three children."
"Good. Let's hear it." As Mello spoke, L started eating his cake, carefully chipping away around the strawberry so as to save that for last.
"Count Olaf was the first person they stayed with after their parents' death," Mello said with an air of recitation. "At first, it seems, he was just abusive, but then he hung the baby in a birdcage from his tower and tried to marry the older girl so that he'd have control over their fortune as her legal husband. They prevented that somehow, and then they were removed from Olaf's care, but he keeps following them around from guardian to guardian to get their fortune. He poisoned their second guardian, their uncle Monty, and threw their third guardian, their aunt Josephine, to a bunch of carnivorous leeches… Are there really leeches that deadly?"
"The Lachrymose leeches," L said through a bite of cake, "found exclusively in Lachrymose Lake, are a species of particularly vicious, toothed leeches. It's possible. However—"
"L, are you eating?" Mello interrupted.
"…Yes. I am eating cake."
"Don't talk with your mouth full," the boy scolded. "Your voice is hard enough to understand with the synthesizer, and it makes it even worse when you talk through bites of half-eaten food."
"Wait a minute then." L took the last few bites of cake and then tenderly ate the strawberry. All the while, Mello stared into the screen, looking amusedly patient. Finally L swallowed the strawberry and continued, "However, that is not new information to me. Near has already told me about Josephine Anwhislte's fate."
Mello's amused expression slipped away into the intentionally blank one again. "I see."
"Is there anything else?"
"One of their last guardians, Esme, was working with Olaf the whole time," Mello added.
"Hmm…" L tapped a few buttons on his computer to bring up a file. "Esme Gigi Genevieve Squalor?"
"If she's married to a man named Jerome, that's her."
"It is, then." L skimmed the newspaper article he had scanned into the file. "Interesting. The newspapers reported that Olaf kidnapped Ms. Squalor. Apparently that is misinformation."
"Guess so. That's all I have for you right now."
"Nice work, Mello," L said. Mello inclined his head in thanks as L continued, "Please continue to find out as much as you can from the Baudelaires, especially what happened to their former guardians, as most of that is very useful information."
"Got it."
"Watari, is anyone in the hallway?"
"No," Watari replied after checking his hand-held monitor.
"You may go, then, Mello."
"Okay. I'll be back soon," the boy guaranteed with a wave, and he left. Watari closed the video feed.
L tapped the new information into his computer and continued his research.
One final note:
L is... a cake-sniffer?