Title: Outlaws2006 - Chapter Twelve: The names Bond. James Bond
Rating: PG
Author: moonmajik and Tanya
Synopsis: Robin and his gang of outlaws, plus Guy of Gisnborne and the Sheriff, get swept 800 years into the future, to the year 2006, into the ladies bathroom of a Starbucks Coffee House. Follow their journey as they get to grips with their new surroundings. Based on the BBC's 2006 Robin Hood.
Pairings: Robin/OC, Will/OC, Alan/Djaq
Disclaimer: We do not own Robin Hood or any associated comments, such as "We go to Nottingham" or "Not being Funny, but..." Especially do not own the Sheriff. Damn. We do, however, own Charli and Tanya. In the later Chapters, there may be other characters that we own.
"Gisborne, get off my foot!" Could be plainly heard in the street as soon as the door to Charli's flat had slammed shut. "And get your bony elbow out of my Stomach!"
"Not meaning to be rude, but it was you who suggested that we hide in this bush in the first place!"
"Well, Gisborne, we could have stood outside that…that…towering block of…whatever…and waited for them but, we would have been seen…and…" The Sheriff elbowed Gisborne hard in the stomach causing an 'oof' to escape from his mouth. "The point is…we need to see what that pitiful excuse of a man and his friends are up to."
"It seems they are having a better time than we are, my lord," Gisborne seethed. "Not to spoil your fun or anything, but the last couple of hours has been a complete waste of time. Your idea to find out who the Monarchy were and overthrown them, at first, seemed most entertaining. But seeing as people we tried to ask ran away when we approached them…well, like I said, complete waste of time. Although, there was that one man who spoke of some place called America…who is George Bush anyway?"
"Gisborne!" Vaysey gave Gisborne another well-earned elbow. "Do I care about the Monarchy right now? Clue? No! Do I care about George Bushy or whatever his name is? Clue?"
"No." Gisborne rolled his eyes.
"Correct. Now…" Vaysey slowly and carefully removed each of his black leather gloves. "What I do care about is Locksley and what he is doing. So, whilst we are here in this…" he looked around and pulled his face, "disgusting world of 2006, we could perhaps take advantage of him and his men whilst they are 'distracted'?"
Gisborne smiled evilly. "Do you have any suggestions, my lord?"
"We watch them, for as long as we can, trying to catch out there weaknesses. Although…" he narrowed his eyes and studied the block of flats. "I have a feeling I know what they're 'weaknesses' may already be."
Tanya looked around, her fingers tangled in her hair in madness, as the outlaws tried to settle down in the living room to watch there first ever movie. It was utter chaos. Little John insisted on standing for some reason. Alan and Djaq insisted on sitting together, whatever that meant. Much wanted to sit in the bathroom and Robin and Will wanted to sit on the floor. She cursed to herself just thinking about not getting to watch Daniel Craig in peace, cute outlaw men or not.
"We'll sit on the floor," Charli spoke for both her and Tanya.
"No!" Shouted all the men at once, causing both Charli and Tanya to jump. "I'll sit on the floor." Robin and Will said at the same time. There was a moment's confusion as Charli, Tanya, Will and Robin looked between themselves, each unsure of what to do.
"You're the guests, you take the seats," Tanya thumbed to the large three seater sofa that easily left room for about five if squashed on…although Alan and Djaq had already claimed two. "We're used to sitting on the floor!" Tanya joked, but only Charli laughed.
"A lady should not have to sit on the floor," Will frowned. "Least never before a man."
"Yeah but…" Tanya opened and closed her mouth a few times before narrowing her eyes. "Look, it's 2006, not 1106-"
"1192." Someone corrected her.
"So, we don't do chivalry. We're used to having doors closed in our faces by men today." She continued. Will looked completely horrified at the thought and went to protest. Robin got there first.
"Sit," he ordered before taking a place on the floor and dragging Will down with him. Tanya looked at Charli and mouthed. "Did he just order us to sit?"
Charli smiled and obediently took a seat next to Djaq. That left two seats, one for Tanya and the other for whomever else wanted it; John was still insistent on standing.
"Much, come out from the bathroom before I come in there and drag you out myself. John, please sit down!" Robin ordered again.
Much appeared, albeit reluctantly and lay on his stomach, head in hands, like a teenage girl. Little John sank down on the sofa, but remained perched right on the edge ready to jump off should the soft chair try to eat him. Tanya turned off the lights, handed the large bowl of sweet popcorn to Charli, who immediately took a handful and began chewing, and then sat down next to her.
"He really likes to give orders doesn't he?" Tanya whispered, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively. Charli to snorted with laughter and choked slightly on her popcorn. "Well, he is their leader," she said in between coughs.
"Sshhhh!" Tanya giggled, trying to straighten her face. "Daniel Craig is about to come on." She picked up the remotes and pressed a few buttons. The TV screen flicked on and the movie began.
"What in the heck is that?" John shouted at the TV screen just as Charli retorted. "Oh yes, because I want to be quiet for Daniel Craig!" Both were shushed again, this time by the other outlaws, all of who were gazing rapt at the screen.
The opening credits started, each outlaw staring at the television in complete awe. They had no idea what was going on and no idea what to expect at all. The most amusing part was when the opening shot of Daniel Craig appeared on the screen.
"Witchcraft!" John yelled, already on his feet and backing away from the group.
"Agreed," Charli muttered. Unfortunately, John backed up into the sofa, tripping himself up and landing in a heap upon Charli and Tanya. "Ow! Tanya, every time I watch this film with you I get abused! Last time you flung the box at me when I wouldn't shut up, now your making Little John fall on me!"
"Hey! Don't you dare start talking now! Or you'll get another box flung at you!" Tanya threatened. Robin turned his head and looked at her worriedly. "What!" She asked, annoyed. James Bond was on for Christ's sake!
"Oh, he's just seeing the violent side of you for the first time! Don't worry Robin, you'll get used to it!"
"Shut up!" Tanya hissed. "I'm trying to watch the film! The others won't get it if you don't let them watch it!"
"I don't think they're getting it anyway," Charli indicated Will and Alan, who were staring at the screen with their mouths hanging open. "How in the hell are we going to explain all the freakin' high tech gadgets and gismos in this film to them, Tanya?" Charli continued, but was quickly shushed by Tanya, Robin and Will again.
"I have an idea," Tanya grinned wickedly. "Witchcraft! Now, shut up and watch the film. The first chase is the best one!"
The group sat and watched the film for a good half hour without one word being said between them; the guys were too hooked to even want to talk. It was funny watching their faces as the movie progressed. Alan even let out a yell or two when things got pretty tense and Robin's face was screwed up in sheer concentration. Charli had had to get fresh popcorn three times, as Little John kept jumping up and knocking the bowl out of her hands sending popcorn everywhere. There was popcorn in Charli's hair, all over Robin, scattered on the floor and stuffed down in between the cushions of the sofa. Charli would be finding the moldy corn for weeks.
Much had stopped sulking and was gazing at the TV in rapture, concentration written all over his face. Djaq had been the only outlaw sharing the popcorn with Charli, and as a result of the sugar overload, was already bouncing in her seat. The last piece of popcorn had sent her over the edge, and Charli began to slowly move the bowl away from Djaq. Unfortunately, there was an explosion on the screen, and Daniel Craig appeared, cut, bloody and bruised, and Little John lept up again, knocking the bowl out of Charli's hands causing it to land upside down on Will's head. Djaq started to giggle.
make Robin and Will end up leaning back agaisnt Tanya and CHarli's legs! awww cute
can you see lots of fights between us? during the film. CUSHION FIGHTS. Well...you and me to start with…i'll go to hit u and accidenty catch robin in the face, i mean comon - we are going to be high on sugar. Then that starts them off. Maybe john can hit u, knock u off the sofa(coz hes so big) and stun u for a minute. then will can be like 'what did you doooo!!'. AREE YOOOUUU OKKAAY?!!?!